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He was definitely not the one. There was no long-term potential here, and it wasn't because you didn't plan enough. You're placing way too much importance on the first few dates. He told you after the fourth date that he wasn't really into it I don't see how things were therefore great in the beginning. They'd barely gotten off the ground when he hit you with this. I get that the first few dates were okay but it seems you got far too ahead of yourself in thinking this was going to be great. Try to keep better perspective next time and don't let men like this walk into and out of and back into your life.

Hey all, For the last few months I have been having semi regular dreams about my ex boyfriend from about 5 years ago. For clarity, things ended abruptly from his end when I left for school so at the time I received little closure. We are also both currently in seemingly healthy relationships and these dreams are not inherently romantic or sexual. The dreams usually entail us reconnecting or having an established friendship, talking things out, and having mature conversations about the past and our current lives. I've started to become attached to the ideas in these dreams and honestly often wake up sad from them. I feel like I need to get this off my chest, but 1. there is no possible way I can get this clarity from him in real life as I don't want to be weird and we haven't spoken since the break up— I even messaged him months later just to check in and got no response, so I don't think I can be the one to reach out ever again (and we are both in relationships and I would personally feel weird if my partner messaged their ex no matter the intention) and 2. I would feel very weird and awkward talking about this with my current boyfriend because I would certainly feel weird if I was in his shoes and I don't want him to misinterpret my feelings or become upset. Google tells me I am craving feelings of closure and clarity, but why now and what do I do when there is no way of achieving it?

I don't really think I can name examples of people who continued to suffer long-term after ending poor relationships, no. The immediate break-up and some months after may sting obviously, but not long-term. Not if the person is of sound mind in a healthy emotional space.

Wait, what? How does his family have anything to do with this? As someone who has previousy obtained a visa for a European country (years ago now), it is issused or revoked by goverment authorities. His family would not be able to do this on their own, and certainly not without you going through the necessary steps. This would be handled by the embassy or consulate nearest you where you applied for the visa in the first place. The visa would be in your passport; they can't just call it in and have it "voided." How did you obtain this visa to begin with? I am asking because something sounds really off here.

This was insanely rude of her. Look man, this woman is not your friend. She doesn't give a crap at all, actually. Her horrible behaviour at this event proves it. I would not have anything further to do with someone who treated me this way. You need to start asking yourself where your boundaries and self-respect are. She apparently wipes her feet on you and you have let her do so. You need to cut this person off.

Do they really, though? I can't think of one couple I know personally who has done this. Yes, we hear stories but this isn't happening "all the time." Not in this day and age where I live, anyway. It sounds like you are exaggerating the frequency in your own mind to justify being reckless with your choices here. It sounds like you are coming to your senses, finally. Hopefully you make better decisions about your relationships in the future.

There isn’t enough information here. She could be interested romantically, or she could be just friendly. The only way to know for sure is to steer the date in a romantic direction and continue having one-on-one dates with her if she is showing romantic interest.

I haven’t really encountered anyone who suffered a lot and for a long time after they had left their incompatible partners. The suffering was during the bad relationship, or just after the breakup. Those who remained in bad relationships continued to suffer. At best, there was some lifelong sense of melancholic resignation.

It’s a good thing that you realize that. But you shouldn’t be rushing into things even with a person who seems right for you. I’m now with a partner who checks a lot of boxes, in what is definitely the best relationship of my life. We’ve been together for almost three years. About a year and a half ago I began precipitating things like moving together, getting married, talked about kids. That did nothing but put a lot of stress and strain on the relationship. Now, not in the least thanks to the kind and wise folks on this forum, I’ve come to understand that rushing things never works. Things have calmed down and we are able to enjoy the life we’re having much more than before.

What? I once got married a year into a relationship, and everyone (rightfully) thought I was crazy. I married someone else after 3 years of dating and living together. The married life lasted only 3 additional years, then we got divorced. Marriage, if you want to do it at all, is the last thing to do in a relationship, after it becomes 100% clear that the relationship has stood the test of time and is for life. It’s like a seal of quality, you put it on a guaranteed great product, not on something you simply want to be great.

If you let people take advantage of you, they will take advantage of you. She isn’t interested in you romantically and she isn’t a good friend. Why do you still want to be close to her? Why are you still thinking of helping her? You should end this unhealthy, unnatural connection once and for all. Stop pursuing her, stop pretending to be her friend while having romantic thoughts about her. And stop believing that she is your friend. Friendships never, ever work when one of the sides has romantic feelings for the other. In the future, please don’t pursue unavailable women.

I’m sorry this happened. I know it doesn’t feel like this now, but you’ve dodged a bullet here. The guy is obviously an immature, confused kid who isn’t fit to be in a real relationship with an adult person. One thing you can learn from this is that it is always a bad idea to get so enmeshed in the life of a person you’ve only known for a couple of years. Treating him like family, getting close to his family and letting him into yours was clearly a premature move. The decision to abandon everything and move to another continent to live with a boyfriend of two years was obviously rushed. A soulmate is someone who has stood the tests of time and hardships. Make sure your future partner passes those tests before you make such huge commitments.

I have an aversion to mortgages because I’d like to stay mobile and flexible for now, and mortgage ties you to one place. Also, where I live buying prices are exorbitant, while rent is somewhat tolerable. I’d definitely suggest moving out and perhaps go for a nice rental if possible.

Wow that is indeed an epic post! Well done on getting your fitness up and moving forward positively in your life, that's great. Reading through that the seems I see there is it's best to try and regulate your feeling if you're going in too deep with some girl who gives you the slightest scrap of attention. Also if someone spends most of their time complaining about how troubled they are and how lousy their life is, you're more there for emotional support than anything else. It seems like you've realised but its better to disengage and dont give it to her unless you genuinely just feel its a friendship and really want to help her.

Right, said girl was a fantastic communicator as well, really straightforward and thoughtful and would say anything she felt she had to say in a very fair, not dramatic way. So the bad experience obviously didn't put her off speaking her mind too much. Unfortunately we weren't compatible in the sense we were both in our 30s, she was dead set against kids and I want a family. But I wish I had met more girls like her to be honest, she was a breath of fresh air and definitely not the norm for me

It's strange that you're framing this as an either-or decision, where the only alternative to living at home with a toxic family is taking on a mortgage. There's also renting? If you're not financially ready to take on a mortgage then you don't purchase property yet, you could also rent.

Wow, what a douche bag. at least you know now he isn’t the guy who keeps his word and you can’t depend on him. im sorry for your pain. i would block him and never speak to him again. Thats a whole lot of hopes and dreams he shattered.waiting until 12 hours before is just despicable!

For context, I've been friends with this girl for about two years, and it's complicated to say the least. I think we both cought feelings for each other at some point, but somehow it never worked out. By the time I was ready to clumsily confess, she was already starting her next relationship and naturally rejected me. We promised to stay friends, but we never mananged to have a proper talk. Mainly because I'm shy and felt insecure when the topic came up. But I also see some fault in her, because we didn't speak for weeks and then she expected me to open up spontaneously. She's been single again for a few months now, and we've started seeing each other more often again. We've never called it a “date”, but judging by the deep talk, shared drinks and long hugs, it often felt like one, and I wouldn't be opposed to it. But it would also be fine if we maintained a close friendship. Last week we took part in a music festival, where you could also offer activities yourself. She wanted to set something up and asked me if I would like to support her. I liked the idea and agreed. I invested a lot of time, even some money and lent her my car. Of course, she did most of the work because it was her idea, but I think I contributed my fair share. After everything was set up, we shared a beer and stayed there for a while. Then she excused herself and didn't come back. She left me standing there alone for at least two hours. I couldn't just leave either, because we had brought a lot of things with us. I even asked the crew, but nobody knew what had happened. I am certain that I saw her briefly, cuddling with someone on a bench backstage. When she finally came back, she saw my disappointment. But instead of talking to me, she just said I should go get drunk and have fun. Because it was already getting late, I decided to stay and pack the car instead. I was always friendly and didn't snap at her. She promised to stay with me for the rest of the evening, we grabbed the last drinks and danced to the last songs. But the atmosphere was strange and she seemed distant, distracted, maybe even sad? Then she disappeared again. I found her with a guy behind a tent, standing close and talking eye to eye. I recognized him immediately. She introduced us a couple of weeks ago. They recently met at another event, he started his own company, and she seemed really impressed by him... I couldn't stand being there anymore. I fetched her bag and asked her several times if she would get home safely. She said yes, and said she would fix this and it didn't work out with him anyways. Then I left, on foot, I needed to get away. The next day I felt completely numb. In the evening, I brought her things over from the car because I had to drive the next day. We exchanged a few sad looks and a distant hug, but nobody said much. She said she would get back to me later, but she never did. Here's the thing: She is an attractive woman and will obviously end up in a relationship again, probably sooner than later. If I want to stay friends with her and I'm not the man she is interested in, that is for me to deal with. But regardless, I feel completely taken advantage of. I have the feeling she only took part in this event, to show this enterpreneur guy that she can pull off cool projects too. I feel like she took advantage of my attention and resources. I feel like she tried to hide all of this from me and would have preferred me to not be there at all. Even if you leave all hurt feelings out of it. I don't think it's right to just abandon your friend for hours without saying anything, while you're both hosting on a public event. I don't know how to deal with this. I feel deeply hurt and used. But at the same time, I feel terrible because I had to leave her with all her stuff. She probably feels like I dumped her. I know she's been having a hard time since her breakup, and I promised myself I want to be there for her. But this isn't the first time I've felt taken advantage of, or she doesn't speak to me for days. So now what, how to save this mess?

Thank you @Acacia98, what you wrote make a lot of sense. It does make me feel sad that things like that happen often and I do feel ashamed of myself for falling for it so easily. it still hurt when I think back of all the things that happened and said. I’m not sure whether I’m hurt because of how I was treated or hurt because I couldn’t be with him. I don’t know if I miss him because I like him so much or I miss the feelings he gave me at the beginning when things was great. I find myself regretting not trying harder, but then I tell myself I won’t be happy in long term if how he treated me at the end of the relationship is his real self. I guess I’m just very conflicted, sad one minute and then ok again. I feel I’m going a bit crazy to be honest. I hope in time I will forget about him and move on without regretting. I don’t want to keep feeling like his the one and that I lost the chance to be happy.

I hate thinking that I’ve been duped, but I feel that it isn’t the great romance it felt like. It doesn’t mean that in the right circumstances the timeframe would be unreasonable. I think what has destroyed the relationship is 1) She is overly sensitive and immature and can’t see anything she does wrong 2) she wants a lot from me, without giving anything back (commitment wise) 3) Age.

I think people get married quickly all the time (3-6 months) and I think in my head I got complacent and thought everything would always be sunshine and rainbows. I’m someone that is very self reflective so when we started having arguments I would apportion the blame to myself in my head and try to make up. I later realised that her behaviour isn’t acceptable. Always having one foot out and expressing doubts but also saying ‘ I love you so much’ etc. it is a case of I want it to work (or wanted) more than it can work. If the relationship is over (which seems likely) it’s not like I want to have kids quickly or get married to the next person I meet. I just felt she was the right person at the time.

When I left my ex-husband, it felt like the sun was coming out after years of rain. After a couple of weeks while I recalibrated myself, my life and mental health improved so much. I can't say I've seen much suffering among people who left bad relationships. But your behaviour of calling people who stay "cowards" does not reflect well on you.

You sound like me from over a year ago and years past. When you think you met a girl who was really into you and doesn't fully commit to what she agreed to the plans made. From what it sounds like she reeled you in with the old "hey stranger" greeting, because you 2 met a few years ago, too. I don't like that, and for good reason, they're looking for something that's not a relationship. Typically, it's attention and validation from guys that these type of women have no romantic interest in. Yeah, you're good enough as a friend, but anything beyond that, no. However, you don't know if she actually does like you romantically and bothers you for a good portion of the day. Then when she lays it out to you that she's not interested, you're left heart broken and feeling foolish. I've had this happen to me on 3 occasions with 3 women. For some context about me, I use to be very overweight. Always wanted to be with a woman, but whenever I tried, I failed. I also wanted to be fit. In 2019, I lost a whole bunch of fatty weight, changing my entire wardrobe and my mentality. Just this past year I finally packed on quite a bit of muscle, but I'll wait on that. Anyway, a year later, the pandemic hit but that's when I ran into the first woman. We'll call her Angela. I knew her from school years ago and our families know each other. Thought it was a good fit. Found out from her she was dealing with the lost of her brother who took his own life and she tried to stop him, so she blamed herself. Also found out Angela used to be engaged a few years prior to a guy who really wasn't a good person to her nor hardly anyone around them (keep this in mind). We went out a few times, had fun, spent hours on end talking, and felt like we were becoming very close. After our last date, and when I was about to go on vacation, I found her deceased brother's birthday was happening, and she went silent, even during my vacation. I got a hold of Angela's sister and brother in-law (who are friends of mine), let them know what was going on because I was concerned that she wasn't doing anything drastic. They acknowledged and understood so they checked on her, and said she was fine, with her even complimenting me. After my vacation, I was going to head to Angela's place to drop off some gifts, but she finally got a hold of me and told me it wasn't going to work out. That hurt, and I found out later, more or less, why she ghosted me wasn't because of her deceased brother, but rather her ex-fiance who had passed away just before or last date. She never got over him, even after he had got married to someone else. I even remember she had gone down to the town where she met the guy to meet up with a friend of hers, but honestly, I think it was to attend the funeral. Even after all the terrible things he did, like steal, lie, and abuse her, she couldn't him let go. So Angela was a learning experience for a couple of reasons: if it's been a few years and the person has shown no interest until now, there's something they want. Also, for every put down they make about an ex and they follow it up with the same number of compliments, that person is not over them. Finally, if they ghost on you and you've done nothing to provoke it, best to move on. Fast forward to the Summer of 2021, I met the second and third women when I started taking ballroom lessons. The 2nd woman we'll call Jody and the 3rd Hope (which we'll get into later). Jody is an older woman, but young for her age. I'd say she's more attractive than Angela, even though Angela was just a year younger than me. The catch with Jody was she became a mom when she was 17 years old and is now a grandmother, only in her mid 40s, too. She was married for 20 years and got divorced about a year or so prior to us meeting. There's a back story as well around the time we met, but it's long, so we'll keep it short. Jody had, seemingly, started taking interest in me. She loved talking with me, dancing with me, and enjoyed opening up her life story to me. I didn't go after her right away, but overtime, I started to like her, and she wasn't that much older than I was. A couple of times when she wanted to do something, a family matter comes up. We were still friends and we talked and did things in groups, but it got frustrating. Eventually, we finally went out a year later (and I'll get into that later with the third woman), and we had a great time. After that, though, and all signals she sent, it wasn't enough in the end because there were other guys after her, even a friend of mine. Eventually, I gave up on pursuing Jody, and she ended up getting engaged months later to another man, only to have the engagement called off over a year later (long story). To this day, I'm still friends with Jody, but I came out learning things: if a friend is showing interest in someone you like, don't try to compete and disqualify that person because it's not worth sacrificing a friendship over one individual. If she flakes on going out with you, stop trying to get that person. Finally, if other people are after her, it's best to stop pursuit of her because you don't know who she might have been with. Now, the last woman, Hope. She's the prettiest of the bunch. Slender, beautiful eyes, healthy, and athletic. Cool person, too, as she was kind, funny, and had more common sense than the other women. I found interest in her in 2022. For a brief moment during that Summer, she was seeing someone, but it was brief and not serious. Still, I ended up going out with Jody that Summer, and then when I found out from Hope's sister and brother in-law (who are also friends of mine), that she was not with anyone. Fast forward a month or so later, we began a series of going and hanging out with her and her sister and brother in-law, with her parents and other family members, and on occasion just us two. She even told me she 'loved me' and kissed me on the cheek at one point. I was beginning to believe in the possibility that MAYBE she might be the one. However, in early 2024, things started happening within Hope's family and disrupted our outings. She started to become a little more distant and disconnected because of the things that were taking place. Eventually, it ended and I had things were back to normal, until late Spring 2024, when I had asked her out again, and she told that she was not interested and rather just be friends. Longest and most quiet drive home I had in a long time, accompanied by a broken heart. Later, I heard she got a boyfriend, but, in the past, these boyfriends were not really boyfriends. But, November of last year, when we got together for a show, and out from this car comes a guy and, immediately, they started holding hands and kissing each other. Another jab at the heart. So the rest of the year was difficult, and despite a failed attempt from a friend trying to hook me up with someone who was the total opposite of who I had my sights on, I made a decision to remain single (unless someone came along). Like Jody, Hope and I are still friends only because of her sister and brother in-law. My final lessons: unless if the woman just goes out with you more often as a couple instead of just groups of people, even if its with her family, don't pursue. Just because she says she loves you, doesn't mean it's in a romantic sense, so unless if she actually kisses you on the lips more than once and holds your hand, she probably has no interest in becoming your girlfriend. If someone you really cared about turned you down, don't try to find someone else, regardless if a friend was simply trying to help, because you need time to heal. Finally, reflect on all the failed experiences you had, see if you did do anything majorly wrong, if you had, fix yourself, but if you hadn't, even with all your self-improvements, begin to make a decision if it's even worth trying again with anyone. I'm not trying to be a downer at all. It's rude when someone flakes on a date you set up with them and it's on them when they do that. So it's not you as a person. However, the reality of it is many of these people don't want to reveal their true intentions moving forward. As I mentioned earlier, I tried with other women before my weight loss but with no results whatsoever, and after my weight loss I had more success to, at least, have women go out with me. It's just they never say, whether or not, they want anything further than just to go out and be friendly. Instead, they give you the illusion that something may happen, but in truth, they don't want anything real romantically. Nowadays, if they're not interested and they still 'yes' to when you ask them out, they don't care enough to not only no show but also not say anything. An alibi, family emergency, work related, nothing, without even apologizing and rescheduling. If you do reschedule, it's not even a guarantee they'll show on the new time and day, and on many occasions, they don't. They won't even respond if you're checking if everything's okay on their end. If you're social media, you'll see them posting stuff, having a good time talking with friends, everything's fine, and they're even talking to another dude(s). But yet they couldn't give you the courtesy of communicating with you, her date. I've had at times that women I asked out and said they would go out on said time and day that they end up going out with another person(s) without even telling you they are. And they don't even feel bad about leaving you hanging. They come up with an excuse, like they're sick or tired, but even if they did stay in for the night, I found there were times they invite either friends or another guy over to her place. It's not that they don't want to be with someone, it's just they don't want to be with you. To wrap up this essay of a post, this girl in your story sounds like she's just giving you the run around. All excuses and nothing to show for it. She likes the attention and validation from you, but unless you're some highly attractive man, she doesn't want anything real from you on a romantic level. Best thing to do is move on from her. She's just going to drive you nuts by making you question if you're even good enough for any woman. I wouldn't even try to find another woman because, as you implied, dating just isn't as enjoyable as it once was. Instead, take time to focus on you. Over the past 6 years, not only have I lost fatty weight, I gained a bunch of muscle this past year (thanks to the gym I've been working out at) as well as regaining flexibility and balance with hot yoga, my income has vastly improved, I've been spending more time with family and friends, I've been doing competitive ballroom/Latin dancing for the past 3.5 years, and, overall, have a much more positive outlook on life. For over a year, I haven't even bothered trying to get in a relationship with women because for too long, I've been let down, and the simple truth is many of the women I may find attraction to don't find me desirable. I believe I would treat them right to the best of my ability, and for all 3 women people said I had done nothing wrong (even the family members of the first woman said it was Angela's fault), but to these ladies, I'm not good enough, despite the improvements. I'll gladly let them have at the Chads, since they think they're so deserving of them, only to see them not getting the relationships they wanted. I've got my own issues I'm trying to resolve and goals that need met. In other words, I have better things to do than to get flaked on again and again by those that have no interest. You should too. This woman in your story sounds like a manipulator, and, honestly, if she liked you, she would have not only gone out with you but also at a sooner time and day. She just didn't care, imo, and it's time to leave her behind, regardless if she pleads. That wasn't fair to you nor was it even right of her to do that, despite if she said she was "feeling sick." She should have said something and rescheduled right away well before the time of the date. At the very least talk, NOT TEXT, over the phone for awhile. Needless to say, I've been down this road, and this is all too familiar, so you would be best to move on. Sorry for the long post, but I hope that any of this helps.

As long as you can service the mortgage repayments, go for it! There is no better feeling than independence, especially if you come from a dysfunctional family background. You can't put a price on your psychological well-being, and you can never move forward while trapped in a toxic environment. From the moment you take ownership you have an asset which keeps increasing in value, (in normal economic circumstances), and if things go wrong you can always sell it. If you choose to buy in a condo, yes, there might be neighbours who get on your nerves, but you have to remember in communal settings that the world doesn't evolve around you, and you practice a bit of tolerance in return for the peaceful feeling of having your very own drama-free space.

Hello, I am new here. I am a woman in my mid-twenties and, up until four days ago, was dating a European for just about two years. I will try to make this as short as possible but with all relevant information. We knew each other through an online friend group of musicians. He pursued me, kept reaching out to me, and eventually I caved and we started talking on the phone and video calling. There was instantly a spark, we spoke very frequently, and it was obvious there was interest. I confessed that I had feelings for him around 2 months into talking, but he made it clear that he wasn't sure where he stood romantically with me and did not want to commit to anything before meeting first. We made plans for him to fly to the states so we could meet and go on a 2-week long road trip together and see if we were a good fit romantically. That meet ended extremely well, and it was clear that we were an item even after he left. About four months after dating, he said 'I love you' and things felt serious after this. We continued to meet each other, travel the world together, become enmeshed in each other's families and friend groups. Everyone around us was very happy and it was obvious that our close circles thought that this would be it and we would be together for the long-term. Not only were we a great couple, we were best friends. We had a couple bad arguments, bickered occasionally, but it was never anything that was relationship ending; we are both very stubborn and tend to squabble, but it always gets resolved quickly and we adapted to our small differences, made compromises, and were generally very understanding of what each other needed. The only thing I was ever wary of was his reluctance to talk about our future together, such as possibly getting engaged, but he never had an issue alluding to having children together. He told me he was "afraid of that stuff" which I understood, and backed off from the one time I asked. This might be relevant. As of around a year ago, we made the decision for me to move over to him due to the logistics, such as starting my graduate program there, getting on with many more friends there than I have here in the states, and having a big support group as a whole. My family was happy for me, his family was excited to have me, so much so that they went ahead and bought us a house for us to live in together (they are incredibly wealthy). Both him and I were excited and started the process for me to obtain my visa. Two weeks ago, I received my visa, which was my okay to move. By that point I had already started the moving process at my apartment and, now, really started to move. I got rid of everything: my furniture, my bed, my kitchen wares, my car, everything except for clothes and small hobby items that would fit in three suitcases, which my now ex was happy to help with monetarily. I also shipped two large boxes of very expensive collections to the new house, which was very expensive and covered by me happily. I also went through the process to bring my cat over, which is a bit tedious to do, but everything was going very smoothly and I was set to depart on 12/06. We were excited and talking about what we would do and when, like seeing a movie in theaters, him purchasing a litterbox and other pet supplies, grocery shopping. Despite the talks, I could see that he was not as affectionate as usual, but he said he wasn't sure what I was talking about. I was a bit on edge and stressed from the move, which caused some small bickering from my end, but I was apologetic. On the night of 12/05, 12 hours before I was set to leave, I received a text that said "[I] should not come to Sweden" and to "call as soon as [I] can". When I called him, he sounded upset and as if he were crying, but wouldn't really say anything. I was incredibly anxious and scared, so I asked if he was breaking up with me, and he said yes. We had a short 20 minute phone call where he told me that our "two significant fights" were deal-breaking and that his friends and family said that he should do this, that he would not reconsider, and that I cannot come. He had apparently been "racking [his] brain" about [if we should breakup] for this past week, and was apparently going to wait until I got to the airport but was convinced not to by his parents. To say I was devastated is an understatement. It felt, and still feels, unreal and like a big joke. Not even three hours after, I received an email from a family member that they were voiding the visa and notifying the necessary authorities, and offered me compensation for my travel, which was not a thoughtful amount. I texted him and asked him to please talk it out with me, to reconsider. We texted the following day, the day I was supposed to leave, wherein he told me that he was actually breaking up with me because he "was never in love with me" despite loving me and caring for me deeply. he said he was trying to hoodwink himself the entirety of the relationship, hoping it would go away or fix itself, but it didn't. I tried to contest it, but he wouldn't engage with my rebuttal. I also told him that I don't want his money, but the offer and email was cold and thoughtless. He responded that he would see what he could do and that he would make sure to send the stuff I shipped back. I don't really know what to believe if this is true or if he just got cold feet, but this is probably been the absolute worst thing that has ever happened to me. I have been left destitute and without any of my things except for my cat, both of us are now restrained to living in a very tiny room with my large family for the time being, as I am now without funds to move again. I've not heard anything from his parents, not even reaching out to see how I'm doing, which is incredibly surprising and unlike them. My life is ruined at the moment and I am lost, hopeless, and feeling like I have nothing to live for. I want to say I would take him back in a heartbeat, but I know what he did is too cruel to forgive, and I know he won't want me back anyway. I need guidance, advice, or thoughts about this. I do not have a large support group here, but I do have my family. I just want my old life back, but I can never have it again.