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Jesus Christ guys, I just wanted a read on the data I presented. Do you feel like there is chance based on what I said that she is potentially showing an interest in something beyond platonic? I'm just wanting a unbiased 3rd party that doesn't know me and doesn't know her and doesn't know the situation. I don't want a judgment on how much time I have on my hands or what trajectory I should take my love life or whether or not I should date her. I'm not coming her for counseling or broad spectrum dating advice, that's in my court, thank you very much. All I want is a read, what is your hunch, If you can't provide that or don't want to provide that, that is fine.

Don't know if that is a real number or that anonymous poster completely made it up. But in anycase the mods should take that post down.

I tiink you correctly assessed that he wasn't really feeling it on the date. It sounds like had a pleasant time but perhaps didn't feel a click. Having said that, I also think you are letting your emotions steer the ship too much : Lonely, really? It was a first meet-up. I could see if you two were actually dating and he often brushed you off, but this was not that deep. Also, in the future, avoid this sort of move: If someone tells you that they don't want to do something, that's your cue to drop it. Don't persist. In and of itself, it's not that big a deal , but it points to a sense of desperation on your part. If you have to convince someone to stay a bit longer with you, you're barknig up the wrong tree, in other words. Just let them go. Lastly, I sense a lot of projecting in your interpretation of events: Really, you have no clue if he was feeling either of the above. If he was longing for you, he likely would have kept the date going, tried to make another physical move, or mentioned meeting up again. And I rather doubt he was suspicious. He could just as easily have been curious about you. My overall impression is that he wasn't into it, true, but also that you walked into this date already loaded with an emotionally-charged filter. You may want to ask yourself why you pinned so many expectations on this specific date to the extent that you are lonely and sad about it. Disappointed, sure, but I would dig deeper. It seems it triggered something inside you, too.

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Why doesn't he just go out with his friends or leave the house himself if he needs alone time. Is it he specifically wants time away from you? Because that's what it sounds like.

She totally knows about your anxiety. Are you kidding me? And yes, you need to officially disclose this. BTW: the entire point of an intimate relationship is that we can disclose our strengths and weaknesses and get support! In other words, you refusing to talk about your anxiety defeats the purpose of a relationship. But let's back up. Tons of people have anxiety? And they do ok in relationships. But if your anxiety is interfering with an intimate romantic relationship, there's a bigger problem going on. Are you getting help for this?!

This is his problem. He needs to learn how to emotionally feel comfortable alone--with you in the house. Most couples solve this one by allowing the partner who wants alone time to not have to do a lot of talking. If he requires you to leave, that's just unrealistic and insulting. He needs to get to individual therapy to figure out how to feel rejuvenated with you around. I wonder if he grew up in a family where people NEVER shut up, so he thinks he needs an empty house. It's HIS job to work this out. Not yours. Maybe he can occasionally take a Saturday to himself and go walking, hiking or just listen to music. But that would be once a month kinda thing. I'm suspicious that your bf is more unhappy with the relationship than he's letting on. You might need to get your guard up--he may be angling to break up with you.

If he is really demanding that he must be alone in the house I'm surprised they have been dating for five years. Then again who knows how long they have actually been living together or around each other frequently.

When someone shows you what they're about, it's up to you to take them or leave them. In this case, the guy is after sex and doesn't care how you feel about that as long as you'll participate. So I don't understand why you haven't just walked away and blocked him.

Sounds like you have far, far too much time on your hands. The only way it makes sense to pursue anything with a coworker is if the right opportunity drops right in your lap. Otherwise, it's too much risk to your livelihood over fantasies you construct in your own head. That's not productive. Take your love life and your social life out into the world to enjoy a healthy context instead of living inside your own head.