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I would start looking for a new job.

So what have you learned about her? That's what seems like the reasonable next step. Assuming you're telling the full story, this woman is extremely moody and acted unpredictably. What happened before all of this? What happened over the weekend?

My gf stayed the weekend. She had a lot of things she brought. She said she has a lot to pack. I started helping her pack. I was just trying to help but she said I was creating more work for her and got really mad. She threw something on the floor that I packed. I asked her why she was mad and she didn't answer. She brought her cats to my house. While trying to catch them to bring them home one was under the table. She kind of pushes me out of the way to go to the table. A little shove even though their was room to go around me or she could have said excuse me. The cat was still and wasn't moving. So it's not like it was running away. I got mad at that and yelled you can say excuse me. She doesn't say anything. I say you know when you get made you are really rude and are acting ridiculous. She yelled back and said I'm going home. I said can you stay so we can talk about this and she said no. I said love you as she was leaving. Took her a second but she did say it back. I apologized for saying what I said and apologized for causing her more work but I did say I was just trying to help and did say I felt disrespected but her shoving me and that I didn't deserve that

My boss is a female

so that means what, he cheated on you?

except not your niece. your friend's child, whom you have no actual relation.

Who exactly is she in danger from? For a woman, dating a woman is statistically WAY less dangerous than dating a man - people might not like this statement but it is factually true. So the danger is from her own parents, it sounds like? And, perhaps, from you... If you don't tell, then there is no danger. Period. Talking to her about it is only going to make things worse, especially if her parents overhear.

The real danger she is in is being rejected by the family that is supposed to support her because of her sexual orientation. So the best you can do is be there for her if things start getting messy with your brother/her dad. Whoever she chooses to date isn't really any of your or his business though. So unless she wants help or someone to listen there is really nothing to do.

I'm so confused as to why you are asking if you should try again with him, when you say you do not love him romantically anymore.

Yes, you do need therapy. You lack self-esteem, trust and you have a control problem. You cannot control that women will try to flirt with him, and you cannot be mad at him because women enjoy looking at him. I agree it takes a confident woman to date an attractive man, I know, my boyfriend is a tall jaw dropping, funny & on top he's younger than I + he's a medical professional surrounded by nurses. All the ingredients are there for me to be jealous and I am not. I understand I cannot control him, I cannot control others, and if one day he decides to replace me with a hot young nurse then....I will be fine! Life will go on, I will cry, mourn, get better, and I'll love again down the road. Stop trying to control life. You will lead a much happier life.

This is a test for what is 'true' love. Christianity is about loving everyone it's not about loving only those who believes like us. If someone comes to you and says they're hungry are you going to ask them of what faith they are before feeding them? Are you going to tell them they need to convert to your faith before you can feed them? Of course not, it goes against what charity is. Charity of the heart is also loving people as they are. Love Thy Neighbor was not only meant for when it's easy. You worry about your own soul, let her worry about hers. You should rejoy that she has found love, probably for the first time, so please don't make it something wrong! You lived your life as you saw fit, it's her time to live hers as she sees fit.

To me personally, this: would be a complete dealbreaker. If there are no romantic feelings then there can be no romantic relationship. Closeness, friendship, anything, but not a love relationship. I don’t think it’s healthy to circle each other after you both have fallen out of love. Maybe cutting off or at least diminishing contact would be a good idea. And it’s definitely time to start dating other people.

It's been a little over three years since my ex and I broke up. We got together very young (18 and 19) and were together for 8 years. As we were young, the early years had a LOT of ups and downs, and we were still working on some of them right before we broke up. Before we broke up, I felt he was the love of my life, even 8 years later. We were very much considered an annoying couple to be around. I was in love with his personality, perspective, and intelligence and thought he was beautiful. We were each others best friends and had a lot of fun doing practically nothing together. We had our issues (such as some overbearing family members, avoidance on his part of tougher things, and I had a tendency to be a hot head and jump to conclusions too quickly) but we were working on these things and they were all getting better before we broke up. We were ridiculously happy together, even when things were "bad." We could be having an awful time- be it a relationship issue or an individual issue, but we could put it aside and enjoy each other's company/be there for each other. But then I found out he had broken my trust. It was like it undid everything, and I felt utterly betrayed. At first, I was reactionary- angry and devastated and, honestly, mean. However, after some time, we sat down to talk and had some brutally honest conversations. We decided to move forward with breaking up more due to breakdowns in communication rather than what he had done. We really valued our time and how much we had grown together and shaped one another and broke up, hoping to remain a part of eachothers lives. I moved away, and we remained somewhat in touch, but very soon after, I knew I was no longer in love with him. I still had a lot of love and care for him. However, I still never stopped missing him. I missed having a partner, a support system, and my best friend. Still, I went about starting over and completed my MA and got a new job in my desired field. I made new friends and have built a life for myself. About a year later, we ended up in the same area and reconnected as friends, spending more time together. It has been another year since then. As of about 4 months ago, we have had less contact as spending time together, especially doing a lot of the same things we used to as a couple, began to get confusing and started to bring up old feelings. We've had some discussion around it and he has expressed wanting to have a deeper/larger discussion about our relationship and break up but we both have a lot of familial and work obligations so we have yet to meet... and truthfully, he is being avoidant again. In the entire last three years, neither of us has moved onto a new relationship or had any serious prospects. While I do not love him romatically anymore, I do still care for him, and I remember how easy and fun it was to be together, both in good and bad times. No one else has known me as well as he did or vice-versa. We got together young, and in a lot of ways, it prevented us from growing, and we made a lot of young and foolish mistakes, taking one another for granted. I find myself wondering a lot these last few months if it was a mistake. What if we were the right person at the wrong time? Too early? Should I reach out to try again? It has been three years, and we still seem to be circling one another. We both have acknowledged that while our feelings for one another have, of course, changed- we know it's a slippery slope (hence the distance recently).

I would watch my back and make sure that I log out of the register. You could go back to the manager and ask for more details on what they meant. I once worked at a job where a worker came up to me (she was a friend of a friend of mine) and she told me I was being too trustworthy. I remember her words. "Don't trust anybody around here. Not even me!" I had to think about what she meant. In my previous job, people were extremely friendly and trustworthy. This job had a lot of disgruntled employees and so I figured out that I seemed too unguarded in talking with these employees. I think she was right. I tightened up a bit. I didn't get paranoid. But I was more cautious. Now, back to you, it seems to me your boss likes you. And also he might not like these other people. Sounds like he's saying the other employees are not trustworthy, will steal from the register if they get the chance and so on. So see if you can bond with the boss. And look, sometimes you do want to leave a job. But it's possible that these other workers will disappear or get fired in the next year or so. I wouldn't quit the job unless I had another lined up. In other words, your boss just told you that the OTHER people were jerks, not you.

"OK, thanks for letting me know"

I am a 62 year old cashier at a gas station slash store. I have worked there over six months. I love doing customer service. I also cook fast foods there. When Xmas came the boss was speaking to me. And said just so you know nobody likes you here so watch your back. And log out of ur register cause they want to set you up." I was shocked. And hurt by this information. They planned a Xmas party at a bowling alley. I did not go I was scheduled to work. Did not want to go bowling with a bunch of folks who didnt like me anyhow. The boss also has food that says keep frozen thawed in the fridge that she has us cook for the customers. I asked her about it and she said corp told her to do it that way. I know food handling been doing it for years. What would you do in this situation?

Exactly. It's not a coincidence that they gave her number to a bunch of random men. OP, please be more careful in the future. This guy sounds like a very bad seed and you had a big blind spot for the red flags.

You're assuming all Christians and religious people reject a girl kissing a girl. In the U.S. polls tend to show a majority of religious believers accepting homosexuality. And one time kissing a girl doesn't really say much for what her sexual preference is. Lots of young women have flirtations with other young women. You talk about values. Well, us secular folks have values as well, strongly held values. And one of them is that we don't need to be bound by views of humanity based on how life was ten thousand years ago when humans were barely out of the jungle, so to speak (I know it's not literal!). You have some choices. You can investigate your views on girls kissing girls. Really investigate them. Or you can continue to just assume your views are right. You can (yes "can") indeed hold your views AND accept your niece--a lot of families do this. These families avoid the topic of dating altogether with the family member they suspect as being gay. One question: if she were to get married to the woman she kissed--let's say in five years--you gonna show up and truly celebrate the occasion with her? In this scenario (hypothetical and jumping way ahead) if you don't show up, she will be crushed, devastated. Just keep that in mind as you work out your views and your values. Kissing a girl isn't dangerous, not in the slightest. Being rejected by a close family member--that is the danger your niece faces!

But your niece isn’t pulling you in a different direction. She isn’t imposing your views on you or demanding that you renounce your faith. Her private life is strictly her own business. Neither you nor her parents should interfere in it. Just for the record, I also believe in Christ but I don’t see anything sinful in consensual homosexuality. My views have evolved with time, maybe yours will too.

'Confront' is a strong word, so decide your goal. If it's to alienate him and leave or kick him out, then your manner of delivery doesn't really matter. If you want to open a discussion, then telling him you heard his confession to his therapist is the honest way to start. The guy took this session in a home where you were allowed to be, so it makes no sense to walk on eggshells about that.

I don't understand the 'danger' or the difficulty. Most healthy people break away from the values of their family in order to learn and choose their own values. While this can create some rifts, it also teaches discretion in what one chooses to discuss with their family members. Whether your niece is experimenting or whether she's gay, it's of no consequence to anyone else. My cousin, who's lived with her lady partner for over 40 years, has maintained her relationships with our hard-core Catholic family. She simply doesn't entertain inquiries into her private love life, and the family has learned how to respect her boundaries. For all anyone knows, the two are friends and roommates. Where's the problem?

Could be. Doesn't cost them anything to phish for women with boundaries so low that they'll go along with anything. So why not profit from them? If she's that easy to manipulate, he wouldn't even need to tell her he's charging the dudes, so he can keep all the money himself.

Her love life is none of your business. It doesn't matter whether it aligns with your faith. She doesn't need your approval nor is she asking for it. Your fixation and attachment to this young woman sounds bordering on a little over the line.

Here is where you need to respect her private life. She is a young women figuring out who she is, and she isn't doing anything wrong. Whether or not you agree with her choice, her love life really isn't your business. If she has a problem at home because of this and wants to open up to you, trust that she will do that. Unless and untli she does that, don't over-step your boundaries.

Just because she likes girls doesn't suddenly mean she is a different person. She's still the same person that she was before you saw her kissing a girl. Treat her like you always have and let her be the one to make the decision when or if she wants to come out. And who knows you don't really know what the situation is. A lot of college age kids go through an experimental phase of their life and for many young women that involves having a fling with another girl. You don't really know what the situation is at this point in rather it is just a phase she is going through or if she has made the decision to have sexual encounters and relationships with other women for the rest of her life. In anycase she is old enough now for her to be the one to decide when she wants to come forward to the people in her life about the sexual and romantic interests that she has.