undergroundlife13 Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 My ex took the cowards way out, ignored all my texts and calls for months. Im done contacting but hope to hear from him one day. Has anyone had an ex reappear? 1 Link to post Share on other sites
youngnlove89 Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Every.single.one But that doesn't mean yours will. And it also doesn't mean that if they do reappear that things will work out either! Link to post Share on other sites
BustedUpInside Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 My ex took the cowards way out, ignored all my texts and calls for months. Im done contacting but hope to hear from him one day. Has anyone had an ex reappear? Why is your ex a coward for ignoring your calls? If he didn't have anything to say, or didn't want to hurt your feelings by going over all the reasons why he doesn't want to be with you, isn't it nicer to just leave it alone and hope you are able to move on? 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author undergroundlife13 Posted June 17, 2013 Author Share Posted June 17, 2013 He wanted me back, then dissapeared. had he simply ended it it wouldve been fine I wouldve appreciated the honesty. Thats why hes a coward. Whats so hard with saying "i changed my mind sorry, were done" Link to post Share on other sites
BustedUpInside Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Oh, I see. That is pretty inconsiderate 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Author undergroundlife13 Posted June 17, 2013 Author Share Posted June 17, 2013 Thats where im at. he said "i miss you i really dont deserve you" blah blah blah only to just dissapear off of the face of the earth? I shouldnt be contacting him and ive stopped, but i have a lot of unanswered questions. Not to mention the breakup was completely out of anger on his part, and we were very happy. Sad. but i still love him. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author undergroundlife13 Posted June 17, 2013 Author Share Posted June 17, 2013 Every.single.one But that doesn't mean yours will. And it also doesn't mean that if they do reappear that things will work out either! I know. I mean i would LOVE for things to work out, but dont expect it. i just need closure. Link to post Share on other sites
SweetiePie12 Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 My ex took the cowards way out, ignored all my texts and calls for months. Im done contacting but hope to hear from him one day. Has anyone had an ex reappear? Yep. He came back in phases. Absolute no contact. Then, only about business. Lately: personal. Over a 13 month period. Scares the crap out of me. If he abandoned me once, he might do it twice. Link to post Share on other sites
SweetiePie12 Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 And it also doesn't mean that if they do reappear that things will work out either! Exactly!!! Link to post Share on other sites
SweetiePie12 Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 Why is your ex a coward for ignoring your calls? If he didn't have anything to say, or didn't want to hurt your feelings by going over all the reasons why he doesn't want to be with you, isn't it nicer to just leave it alone and hope you are able to move on? It's like that for some people. Not all. Link to post Share on other sites
SweetiePie12 Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 he said "i miss you i really dont deserve you" blah blah blah Huh. Mine is saying he misses me, but seems to want me to prove to him, still, that I deserve him. Not to mention the breakup was completely out of anger on his part, and we were very happy. Ah. I can relate. Our relationship was young, so the challenges that came our way were too much for our young affair. Link to post Share on other sites
BustedUpInside Posted June 17, 2013 Share Posted June 17, 2013 It's like that for some people. Not all. I don't understand what you mean. Link to post Share on other sites
Author undergroundlife13 Posted June 17, 2013 Author Share Posted June 17, 2013 Huh. Mine is saying he misses me, but seems to want me to prove to him, still, that I deserve him. Ah. I can relate. Our relationship was young, so the challenges that came our way were too much for our young affair. Did he leave you tho? And yeah me and him are young, i was his first relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
simplyamazing Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Why is your ex a coward for ignoring your calls? If he didn't have anything to say, or didn't want to hurt your feelings by going over all the reasons why he doesn't want to be with you, isn't it nicer to just leave it alone and hope you are able to move on? I'm sorry, but I just have to reply to this. If you're in a relationship and want to end it with your partner the RESPONSIBLE and RESPECTFUL thing to do is tell them, regardless of how it may make them feel. Vanishing IS the cowards way. And it hurts the dumpee even more. My EX sorta did this to me. So, no... it's not nicer. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
iouaname Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 I associate wanting my ex to reappear less with wanting him or the relationship back and more with wanting to feel validated and wanting to feel like after everything, I wasn't so easy to forget about. I think once the self-esteem issues get worked through, it won't matter anymore whether you hear from them or not. That was pretty lame of him to do, and I'm sorry! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
SweetiePie12 Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 Did he leave you tho? Yep.......... Link to post Share on other sites
Author undergroundlife13 Posted June 18, 2013 Author Share Posted June 18, 2013 Yep.......... Then he shouldnt be wanting you to prove you deserve him.. Link to post Share on other sites
1908 Posted June 18, 2013 Share Posted June 18, 2013 I've only had a few ex's in my life and all but one have been short-lived relationships. None have reappeared thank the gods. Link to post Share on other sites
scorpio1978 Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 Most of mind have, but much longer down the road after a break-up. One came back a month later with some lame excuse of wanting to give me back my Tupperware, but at that point, I was so pissed off and angry, I told him to keep it. He still pops up, testing the waters almost a year later, but I have no feelings for him. He dumped me in a very crummy way. One came back 10 years later and several others in a time frame in between. With every single one, the feelings were gone by the time they got their heads out of their a**es! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
underpants Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 Most of mind have, but much longer down the road after a break-up. One came back a month later with some lame excuse of wanting to give me back my Tupperware, but at that point, I was so pissed off and angry, I told him to keep it. He still pops up, testing the waters almost a year later, but I have no feelings for him. He dumped me in a very crummy way. One came back 10 years later and several others in a time frame in between. With every single one, the feelings were gone by the time they got their heads out of their a**es! Word. I bet you gave them something to think long and hard about. Link to post Share on other sites
LovelyDaze Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 Yes. I have had a few come back but the latest one(from the reason I came on LS for in 2009) was by far the "best." My ex left me for another and married her within months of meeting/dating. Not too long after, they divorced and he called, text and emailed for me to go out for coffee, lunch, dinner, etc. just to "talk". I was like anyone else on LS, I struggled and wanted to give in but ultimately KNEW his intentions were to keep feeding me breadcrumbs and eventually he disappeared(GOOD RIDDANCE !) It's always up to the dumpee to decide when and if they want to even respond to their ex after a hard break-up. My recommendation is to do so with extreme caution. NC is the golden rule and it works in so many ways. NC is great to give time and space away from the Ex. It can lead to an Ex realizing they truly want to work things out(not ex-sex, breadcrumbs, or ego boosting), It is ALWAYS great to get your feet, self esteem, and heart back on track, and NC is wonderful in the sense that it shows your ex that you are not some "psycho-ex" who is just going to beg and plead for their attention. My ex was no good and I have happily moved on! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
ljpaterson Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 The ones that you didn't really care about come back. The ones you kind of wish you would hear from, you probably won't ever hear from again. That's what happened with me, anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 My ex didn't come back. Over time, he may come back, wanting to be friends with me. I don't think I will want that though. AND - he was saying that he was still in love with me, he had never felt this way about anyone else (he has been around a lot of girls), that he adored me and loved me enough to want to try again. As you can see, even the exes who SAY they want you back/still love you/don't want anyone else/ they are not sure if they just want to move on. EVEN exes who say those things, don't come back, in a real way. I think NC should be a lifestyle. I would actually love to respond if my exes wants to be friends in months to come - except, logically, I know that I will not be ready for "friendship" with a guy I was once in love with. ...................................... Yes though. I think they can often come back. My gut says my ex will in some way, but it will be because he wants to be friends. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Enna Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 ALWAYS. It's the circumstance for which the phrase 'Be careful what you wish for' was invented. The first left and used to turn up singing songs on my doorstep. If I'd known about NC then I'm sure I'd have ended up back with him (thank God I didn't). One (I clung to initially, then just went NC) was pestering my friend with a long email about our relationship a year later (I was furious with him and got anger back) One came back after eight weeks of NC, only to be every bit as useless for the next 18 months I was with him. Latest ex, to whom I went NC immediately, is sending me self-pitying breadcrumbs saying he thinks about me 'so much' and 'I have loved you so much' and 'It would mean so much if we can still speak' (i.e. HOT AIR) after almost a month. So - they do always come back and it's always (in my experience) rubbish. It makes you feel better temporarily, but the risk is you end up with someone stupid enough to have got rid of you in the first place. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Leigh 87 Posted June 19, 2013 Share Posted June 19, 2013 ALWAYS. It's the circumstance for which the phrase 'Be careful what you wish for' was invented. The first left and used to turn up singing songs on my doorstep. If I'd known about NC then I'm sure I'd have ended up back with him (thank God I didn't). One (I clung to initially, then just went NC) was pestering my friend with a long email about our relationship a year later (I was furious with him and got anger back) One came back after eight weeks of NC, only to be every bit as useless for the next 18 months I was with him. Latest ex, to whom I went NC immediately, is sending me self-pitying breadcrumbs saying he thinks about me 'so much' and 'I have loved you so much' and 'It would mean so much if we can still speak' (i.e. HOT AIR) after almost a month. So - they do always come back and it's always (in my experience) rubbish. It makes you feel better temporarily, but the risk is you end up with someone stupid enough to have got rid of you in the first place. Did they come back because they genuinely were in love with you, though? Or were they just bored with their dating life and they really liked you and wanted to enjoy their time with you again? Just wondering. I assume that my ex will only bother with me again, cos he would want to be "friends". To which I would not even bother. Before NoContact, he would tell me he loves me/misses me/ does not want other girls AT ALL. That he did not want to move on for good and maybe we could work things out/get back together. I just think it is RARE that a guy comes back, with the GENUINE intention of wanting you back. Why did those guys come back, do you think? Link to post Share on other sites
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