What do I have left to do?

[Aeolus]

I'm new here and I never thought I'd come to a place like this....but me and my girlfriend/fiancée of 3 years have had a rough relationship due to my own selfishness and being blind...the first year and a half was pure heaven we were perfect for each other since we met she for perfectly in my arms and we never had an issue before I knew it we were engaged and supposed to have a baby....Long story short I cheated I lied and we were on off for the last year...well I ended up having an epiphany about a month ago and I wanted to apologize and propose again...I truly do love her and felt terrible for everything I did I gave myself to god and want and still have been changing my ways...she was set to leave for the NAVY a week after...so I wanted to do all of this before she left...one day I went to her I kissed her still got butterflies in my stomach and she cried she said that it reminded her how much she loved me...and we just talked for a little made our promises that we would keep contact and that we'd miss each other...we didn't talk that night too much...but then I find out about the other guy...I asked her who he was she just said a close friend...so I wasn't too worried...so the next day I went to her again on her lunch break with some gifts and a binder of pictures that she had given us for our one year I told her that I didn't want that binder to stop....that I loved her she went through it she got stuck on a couple of pictures...but she closed it and said no...she said maybe some day but not now and she walked out on me....I burst into tears and she looked back at me...the next day I did the same thing...I went to her again...and this time I poured my heart out to her...and she was completely different she was cold wouldn't even give me her hand...I told her I refused to let her go because I love her...I grabbed and I kissed her...she just shoved me away and walked out of the car and didn't look back this time....from there I only saw her one more time just to cry with her sitting there...what happened?how did she flip in a matter if days? Turns out she got with her "close friend" and I'm left here alone to regret everyday of how I hurt her...she's been away at the navy for 17 days but she's since sent me mixed signals she called me to say goodbye she secretly called me to try and contact her mother and she also secretly slipped me a letter too...the letter really didn't say much it was mostly an apology for calling me late that day...but am I looking too much into it?...is the love still there..I've gotten depression I've been seeing a therapist I have been trying to surround myself with friends and better myself but it's an everyday struggle thinking about the baby we lost and her...I'm stuck here what should I do?

[Mr Scorpio]

Learn from your mistakes. You say that you cheated and lied. You hurt her. Let her be. If she comes back, apply what you have learned and hope for the best.

 

Also, in the future, don't type everything in one huge block of text. You are more likely to get responses if your message is easier to read.

[AnyaNova]

For some reason, when I type a message into my computer with spaces, they never go through into the posted message. I have to either type everything on the phone and trust autocorrect, or type on the computer and hope nobody posts before I can edit and add the spaces in.

 

Perhaps he is having the same problem?