yxalitis Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Long time no post...seems I've been content with my lot. I was dating a girl in HK, but for various reasons (not the distance), I decided it wasn't right... Early last year i had a fling with my waxing therapist. We went out a few times and had sex once, but she had a bf, and I was in the midst of a bad break up with my girlfriend. I moved on from that, I moved to the other side of town, and let her to her bf. Well, fast forward and i have a new job back only a few blocks from her work. She was always the best waxer I've ever had (She uses an organic honey and sugar wax). I rsng and she answers the phone: "Hello [my name]" Hi Sue (assumed name), how's things? "Good, you haven't called me for a long time!" Anyway, we get to chatting, and she suggests I come out for dinner after work. We share a pizza, and she chats about her bf, who has been in India for a few months, but she is planning to go live with him...in New Zealand! She is the sort of super-pretty, super sexy girl that has no problem attracting men, but finding a man who truly loves her for who she is, not just for sex, is challenging. OK, I'm 49, she is 24, let's just get that out now. We get along very well, there has always been an ease to our relationship, she can talk to me like no other man (including her bf). She got annoyed when I jokingly referred to our fling, she seemed quite ashamed of that...or so I though. But we keep chatting and texting through the week, everything is just jovial friendship stuff until Saturday. She texts: "What you doing?" "At home watching TV, you?" "I have an assignment due, but too lazy to work on it." (She studying business at uni, she's a very smart cookie) I don't follow up on this, so a few lines later she texts: "Maybe you could help with my assignment?" Sure, come over after work" "Yes, sure, I will" "You know I never been to a boy's place on my own like this before" Come 9:00pm, she's finished work, and asks me if I could pick her up, as she's not confident finding my place on her own (She's never been to this place). I pick her up, she dressed casually, but sexy, her usual style. As I'm driving home, she says with a big smile: "I didn't bring the assignment" So we get home, sit on the couch, talk, share a drink. After a while..I don't know, I wasn't consciously trying to kiss her, I just naturally leaned over, she leaned in, and and we kissed passionately. We went to the bedroom for more intense kissing, then she broke off... Now, I can't, you have gf, I have a bf... And I get this...agreed. So I drove her home, we kissed more in the car, and i return back. A half hour later she texts me... "are you asleep yet" "Nope, wide awake" "Yeah, hehe, me too" So i start to put two and two together (yeah, I know, I'm slow sometimes) Mentions assignment mentions again, asks for help agrees to come over wanted me to pick her up kisses me passionately. So i text her: "If I just knock on your door in half an hour, what would you do?" "hehe, open it" followed by 8 tongue-out emoticons. So of course i go over, she answers the door in her sexy nighty she's still wavering, she makes me pinky promise no sex. but we kiss and fondle each other... she's wearing the most sexy lingerie knickers under her tiny shorts... we fool around, then i stop and say: "pinky promise", and lie next to her for sleep. we repeat this a few times, getting each other incredibly horny.. after about 2 hours, we start kissing again, her top is off by this stage, and I just pull her onto me...reach under her panties....she is dripping wet... We have sex...and it's incredible...she is an amazing, passionate lover...wow. After, she's crying...I never had a girl cry after sex before. We talk...she's feeling guilty, but clearly she wanted this. I stay over the Monday night, seems she want to be in her room every evening because her bf INSISTS she video chat every night. She video chats to him, and i can tell... He talks on and on about himself, then talks about her as a sexual object..."You're so sexy, I love your skin, you bum is awesome. When she and I talk, I talk about HER, not her sex. She chats to him while I'm sitting on her bed... Then we go to sleep, and again have sex. Tuesday morning, she tells me she can't see me anymore, so i say "that's fine, this is the last time you'll see me." I leave for work, and from her door I say: "See you tonight" She laughs, but says "no" Now, my intention was to go cold turkey, not call, not text, and certainty not visit that night. But she calls at lunch, then texts me: "What time you finish today" "Can i come over to your work and wait for you to finish" So she does, I take her home to have a shower anc get a change of clothes, and back to her place. This time there is no guilt, no games, and the sex was even more amazing. Wednesday morning, sex, then off to work. Wednesday night, again I just stay over, she is packing her things as she is moving to her friends place for a fortnight before going to Vietnam for a holiday with her family. Sex again, and in the morning again as well. OK, so you're all thinking...it's a fling. Both their partners are overseas, and they got horny. Except it's more that that. For a start..why me? This girl can get any man she wants...no problem. Yet the one she chooses is...me. Yes, she is attracted to me, but it's not a physical attraction, I'm not fat, but I'm not ripped either, and yeah, the age gap. And for me it;s not just physical either. Yes, I didn't pull punches describing the sexual interaction we had...but...there's more. I've had intense physical relationships before, I know the difference between lust and love. She talks to me like she can with no other man. I asked her...why did you come over Saturday... I'm human, I felt the need. NO, not why did you want sex...why ME? She looked away..."I don't know" I sat her down, and asked her...look, tell me if this is just a physical thing, OK? She shook her head... But I love my bf, I'm confused why i'm with you. "If not for him, I'd stay with you...but I made my choice, I'm, going with him to New Zealand" (He's Indian by the way, no idea why he's relocating to NZ). "Have you lived with him?" "A week in India once..." "That's IT!" "Yeah..." "Have you EVER lived with a boyfriend." "No..never..I always have my place...and just stay one night or so a week." "So, you are moving country to be with this guy...you've never really experienced much time with" (He's been in India for 5 months already, before that they dated for about 6 months). "I know, but it's my choice" "What do you love abut hinm" "nothing much,,he talks to much, I like quiet time, he controls me, tells me what to do" (And he does, he will call, if she doesn't answer, he'll just keep calling...like 20 times. OK, MY OPINION...feel free to tell me that I'm deluded... He's obsessed with her sexually, I've been in that position, it's a powerful state of mind...but he loves her for WHAT she is, not WHO she is. I'm clear, this is worth pursuing. WE talked about this, and she told me "Fine, prove your love to me!" So I invited her over for dinner, cooked her a vegetarian meal, watched IT Crowd which she loved...I could feel her comfort with me, the easy way she caressed me while sitting next to her, the kisses she offered... So, am I nuts? Because I don't think so... 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Robratory Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 (edited) I'm clear, this is worth pursuing. WE talked about this, and she told me "Fine, prove your love to me!" So I invited her over for dinner, cooked her a vegetarian meal, watched IT Crowd which she loved...I could feel her comfort with me, the easy way she caressed me while sitting next to her, the kisses she offered... So, am I nuts? Because I don't think so... I don't think you're nuts, but you know, [sex] is a powerful drug, so like Steve Reeves in that Hercules movie where they make him drink something every day that makes him never want to leave the Island of Hot Virgin Maidens (as if...!), you just can't see your way out. I think it's worth pursuing, but maybe not like you think. A 24 year difference? You'll be 73 when she's your age. At 49, how hot do you find the 73-year-old chicks? This is not a love for the ages, but it certainly could be a love for these days. My advice to you is to enjoy the spring chicken while supplies last. Enjoy her sexually and teach her stuff she didn't know, but don't get too involved in the endless drama that is her life. When the time comes, kiss her on the cheek and let her go. Maybe she'll remember you as fondly in her old age as you remembered her in yours. Edited January 23, 2016 by a LoveShack.org Moderator 2 Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 First off, I thought 14 year gap was pushing my luck, but you Sir have re-invigorated me! I salute you for this great conquest! As for 73 yr old guy with a 49 yr old woman... please... look at Stallone... Geraldo Rivera... if a 24 yr old woman is all over him at 49, he'll still be rocking it at 73. OP you are a hero to men everywhere! #MakeHongKongGreatAgain Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 20, 2016 Author Share Posted January 20, 2016 Another thing...she's setting up her own business, just opened the door today. This was a huge effort for her, yet she plans...to just leave it. A friend of my said: "She's looking for a way out of her arrangement, she's not happy, but too proud to admit it, maybe even to herself" And frankly, her bf is a douchebag... Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 20, 2016 Author Share Posted January 20, 2016 First off, I thought 14 year gap was pushing my luck, but you Sir have re-invigorated me! I salute you for this great conquest! As for 73 yr old guy with a 49 yr old woman... please... look at Stallone... Geraldo Rivera... if a 24 yr old woman is all over him at 49, he'll still be rocking it at 73. OP you are a hero to men everywhere! #MakeHongKongGreatAgain Hey, what's the hashtag in reference to? I've a big fan of HK, well, the girls anyway... http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/541519-holy-hong-kong-girls-batman http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/543518-holy-hong-kong-girls-batman-dark-night Link to post Share on other sites
neowulf Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Well.. I'm 37 and the thought of shacking up with a 24 year old makes me queasy ... She's 24 man. How can you possibly have anything in common with a girl so much younger than you? I'm not saying that to judge you. I'm actually asking. She's in a completely different stage of her life to you. She's just starting her life journey. You might be an interesting distraction for a while, but it's doubtful you'll build anything that lasts with this woman. Which is fine. You're two consenting adults. I just wouldn't get too attached. 7 Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Hey, what's the hashtag in reference to? it's in reference to a certain GOP candidate. Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Well.. I'm 37 and the thought of shacking up with a 24 year old makes me queasy ... She's 24 man. How can you possibly have anything in common with a girl so much younger than you? I'm not saying that to judge you. I'm actually asking. She's in a completely different stage of her life to you. She's just starting her life journey. You might be an interesting distraction for a while, but it's doubtful you'll build anything that lasts with this woman. Which is fine. You're two consenting adults. I just wouldn't get too attached. Yes and No. If they are madly into each other, why not? 37 and 24, what's not to like? If she's old fashion and wants something serious, what's the hang up? Then again, if two people are into each other, why let age stop them? -- I'm talking adults over 21. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 20, 2016 Author Share Posted January 20, 2016 Well.. I'm 37 and the thought of shacking up with a 24 year old makes me queasy ... She's 24 man. How can you possibly have anything in common with a girl so much younger than you? I'm not saying that to judge you. I'm actually asking. She's in a completely different stage of her life to you. She's just starting her life journey. You might be an interesting distraction for a while, but it's doubtful you'll build anything that lasts with this woman. Which is fine. You're two consenting adults. I just wouldn't get too attached. Most 24-year old girls are immature, party mad, insecure twits, i agree. This is not your typical 24 year old. She's not interested in going out clubbing, she's happy at home. She doesn't talk endless crap just to fill the air with sound, she'll talk about things of importance. She's smart, and wise... "When did you first fall in love" "Who can answer that" she replies "love changes throughout every part of your life, my first bf at 18 I loved" "Yes, was that real love?" "It was 18-year-old love, it was what it was" She's strong willed, sure of herself, but willing to accept multiple options when deciding on a course of action. She's demanding but not judgmental. Frankly, she's amazing. Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Ow, could not read. Paragraphs and formatting please? Don't know if mods have time to fix. Sorry. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Ow, could not read. Paragraphs and formatting please? Don't know if mods have time to fix. Sorry. Me too, I gave up, though being the same age as the girl ... just :sick:. I'm not against it in theory, but there is just no way. I see guys that old as a completely different species from me! The Dad species! 7 Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Me too, I gave up, though being the same age as the girl ... just :sick:. I'm not against it in theory, but there is just no way. I see guys that old as a completely different species from me! The Dad species! LOL, my H is 49. His daughter is 26. They are so many miles part in thinking, it's hilarious! 2 Link to post Share on other sites
Rejected Rosebud Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 I just read it and now I feel a little bit disturbed. But anyway OP, she has a boyfriend, you had sex with her before, then what was this about? "You know I never been to a boy's place on my own like this before" She must have been to her own "boy"friend's place since she stayed with him in it. And she called you a boy!! The whole "homework assignment" thing sounds more like an 8th grader, so I'm not thinking that this is an exceptionally together 24 year old woman! Also at first you said you were broken up with your HK girlfriend and at the end you said that you have a girlfriend overseas. You are contradicting yourself a LOT!! and it reads like some kind of softcore erotica. Anyway it just doesn't ring true so it's hard to take the whole thing seriously, good luck to you though. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
HereNorThere Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 (edited) It'll all be fun and games until you're that boyfriend on Skype. It's nice to see at 49 that you can still fall batsh*t insane over a girl, but c'mon man. You're demonstrating classic new love rose tinted classes infatuation/obsession. At 49, surely you've seen this movie before. This is how it always starts out. This time will always be different. How many people have you dated since you were 24? I know, I know "she's different" but surely this isn't your first go around. Have your fun and heck, even a little proud of ya *brofist* but keep your wits about you. We all get ourselves into trouble building the sandcastles out of bs from time to time. Part of wisdom is accepting that we all have a tendency to do this. Besides, she may be different, but she's still human. You've shown too much interest too fast and she will eventually disrespect you for it. That's just how they are, man. You don't make it to 49 without learning this lesson already. You just lost your head for minute, but don't make a rookie mistake at 49. Edited January 20, 2016 by HereNorThere 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Author yxalitis Posted January 20, 2016 Author Share Posted January 20, 2016 (edited) It'll all be fun and games until you're that boyfriend on Skype. It's nice to see at 49 that you can still fall batsh*t insane over a girl, but c'mon man. You're demonstrating classic new love rose tinted classes infatuation/obsession. At 49, surely you've seen this movie before. This is how it always starts out. This time will always be different. How many people have you dated since you were 24? I know, I know "she's different" but surely this isn't your first go around. Have your fun and heck, even a little proud of ya *brofist* but keep your wits about you. We all get ourselves into trouble building the sandcastles out of bs from time to time. Part of wisdom is accepting that we all have a tendency to do this. Besides, she may be different, but she's still human. You've shown too much interest too fast and she will eventually disrespect you for it. That's just how they are, man. You don't make it to 49 without learning this lesson already. You just lost your head for minute, but don't make a rookie mistake at 49. I do hear you...loud and clear... Yeah...the pretty young thing in my arms is a big deal..I agree. But I stand by my "she's different" comment... My last gf I lived with for 9 months was also younger and super horny, super hot... I left her because she proved that her interest was in what I am...not who I am. I'm not making that mistake again... I'm showing her interest..but not the kind she's used to. I'm not just banging on about banging her, or talking endlessly about her gorgeous figure, tight arse, or whatever... I'm taking to het about her character, her strength, her resourcefulness, her determination. I can assure you, men she knows don't talk to her like that. And in the end..I'm not throwing it all in for her..if it continues..great..if not..I have an amazing experience to remember... I am keeping a perspective here... For now, this is awesome. If it lasts...great..if it doesn't...I'm okay with that. Edited January 20, 2016 by yxalitis 1 Link to post Share on other sites
Toodaloo Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Same age gap as one of my exes. Yeah there is a reason why he is an ex... Time to cold turkey this one. Link to post Share on other sites
Zippy2000 Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Not sure what your post is asking however love has no age limit. My work colleague is 53 and his wife is 24. Im kinda seeing girl who is 25 now and Im 41. I need to add I dont look 41. More like 61 lol. Only kidding. I look in my early thirties. I do worry what other people think and I worry what this girl I like parents think of me. Although I do know she has spoken to her dad about me. Remember she is 24 and not 14. She is classed as a woman. An adult and she can choose what she wants in her life. I have a friend of a friend who is in her 30s who is weeing a 74 year old! As you get older I think its more acceptable. it just depends what you want in life. 1 Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 LOL, my H is 49. His daughter is 26. They are so many miles part in thinking, it's hilarious! What about 37 with 25? Link to post Share on other sites
truth_seeker Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Not sure what your post is asking however love has no age limit. My work colleague is 53 and his wife is 24. Im kinda seeing girl who is 25 now and Im 41. I need to add I dont look 41. More like 61 lol. Only kidding. I look in my early thirties. I do worry what other people think and I worry what this girl I like parents think of me. Although I do know she has spoken to her dad about me. Remember she is 24 and not 14. She is classed as a woman. An adult and she can choose what she wants in her life. I have a friend of a friend who is in her 30s who is weeing a 74 year old! As you get older I think its more acceptable. it just depends what you want in life. I'm in my late 30s and I'm interested in a 25 year old woman. I look in my 20s and I have girls in HS and college approaching me - I don't talk to them. lol. I've said it before, it comes down to LOOKS and at times STATUS Derek Jeter - 41 His fiance is 24 John Stamos - 51 He's dating 20 somethings Geraldo Rivera - 72 His wife early 40s... they met when she was in her 20s! Link to post Share on other sites
solway86 Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 I did/do like older women, but not with a large age gap. When I was 23, I liked a 36 year old, that's a 13 year age gap. Now, at 29, she'd be 42, however it never got anywhere as it was too far for even a long-distance relationship. Think about the reality of the relationship, do you actually have a lot in common in terms of personality, tastes in food/drink, religion, family values etc.? It can work, but takes a lot of time and effort, like any relationship, only more so due to age disparity. Not all 24 year olds are immature or party-mad, as someone suggested earlier - I knew a woman when I was 26, she 24, and she was very grounded, didn't do drugs, well-spoken etc. The fact she has a boyfriend already, though, red flag, you probably don't know if she is cheating with other men aside from you - and I am not saying this to scare you or offend you. Either way, take it carefully as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
HereNorThere Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 You mention her character and other moral attributes, but how much character can someone have if they are skyping with their boyfriend while the guy they are banging behind his back is in the other room? Seriously, what would make you so special that she wouldn't do this to you? She already shown you how treats her "boyfriend" and now that person is you. It honestly sounds like you are in love with the fantasy of who you want her to be as opposed to who she really is. I mean, that Skype thing was about as dirty as gets. Surely you can't ignore a huge red flag like that? 8 Link to post Share on other sites
No_Go Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 Oh people.... I see soooo many men (and women) SAYING that they look much younger.... Let's put it non-offensively.... They don't. I can guess ages pretty well, except for East Asians, just because the features are a bit different. The examples that you gave exist, but it is DESPITE the age difference, not because of it. Let me not be a generalist: in my personal experience, I dated a man who was 46 (at 27), then a 29 yo (at 29). Well, the difference was VERY measurable - even just looking at the skin texture. The older one was much more fun though - here is where age doesn't matter. If anything repulsed me from the older man was his BELIEF that he looks/appears younger and couldn't man up and embrace his advanced age with dignity... I'm in my late 30s and I'm interested in a 25 year old woman. I look in my 20s and I have girls in HS and college approaching me - I don't talk to them. lol. I've said it before, it comes down to LOOKS and at times STATUS Derek Jeter - 41 His fiance is 24 John Stamos - 51 He's dating 20 somethings Geraldo Rivera - 72 His wife early 40s... they met when she was in her 20s! 1 Link to post Share on other sites
MidwestUSA Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 What about 37 with 25? That's pretty reasonable, if she's a mature 25. They could be at the same stage of life, maybe not. It comes down to the individuals. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
smackie9 Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 ya if you have a mature 30 year old and an immature 50 year old, you can meet somewhere in the middle. 3 Link to post Share on other sites
VeveCakes Posted January 20, 2016 Share Posted January 20, 2016 I agree she lacks moral fibre big time. Plus she started a business and is just dropping it to move to another country with an ******* boyfriend? She isn't that smart, or there is something missing. 2 Link to post Share on other sites
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