Need comments on whether to wait or not

Hi everyone, new to the board =). I was hoping everyone can give your comment on my situation.

This girl and I have been “together” for the past 5 years. When I say “together”, I don’t exactly mean we were dating. We got together at the beginning of our relationship because we both really liked each other. But because I felt I wasn’t ready to start dating due to various reasons, we remained friends with benefits until the 3rd year mark. Although I was still not ready, we tried dating anyways at this point because I felt it wouldn’t be a good idea to keep on dragging things on. However, the dating didn’t last long due to personal reasons on my end. But because we were so close to each other and got along so well, we remained best friends. However, we felt the benefits had to stop. Last year she moved out of town for school and during this time frame she has come to accept the fact that nothing more will come out of our friendship. The catch however is that I still have feelings for her but just haven’t brought it to her attention (I was probably being too friendly). I thought that since she’s away from home me being in school, it was probably not the right time to let her know of my feelings. Last week, she informed me that she plans on starting a new relationship with someone else. So I finally told her my feelings for her and that I would love to have one last chance. She felt that she has already given me 5 years of her time and I haven’t done much to act on the chances that were upon me. Thus, she was unable to agree to my request. Since she is someone I really cared for, there wasn’t much I can do other than to wish her happiness with her new relationship. We left on good terms and she wished me happiness as well.

Now here is my dilemma. I can't find closure and the means to move on because the rejection didn't come from her when she was single. Hence, I am very curious to know if things would've been different if I expressed my feelings to her before her new relationship. I say this because she was very surprised by my request for another chance when we had our final talk. It seems like there's still may be something left between us, but because she's in a new relationship, this matter cannot be solved entirely at the moment. Should I wait for her to see if she’ll become single again and make another request or should I move on and if the chance arises in the future, ask for another chance then? I really love her and it’s eating away at me that I didn’t express my true feelings to her sooner. Any comments would be appreciated.

should I move on and if the chance arises in the future, ask for another chance then?

^^^This is your answer.

You blew it, and youre LUCKY she stuck around for as long as she did. Dont count on her coming back though, because girls love doesnt usually come back the same after they give up on you.

Curious what could have kept you from telling her all those other years, yet now you want her. What were these personal reasons that you couldn't date her. Do you really want her now or is it just the realization that now you CAN'T have her, and you feel like you blew it. I know it's not always easy to understand your own feelings and you probably did your best to do what felt right, but you had such a huge window of opportunity, I don't blame her for not caring much now.

You can't stop her from seeing this other guy now. Just have to move on and see if you are ever presented with another opportunity.

^^^This is your answer.

 

You blew it, and youre LUCKY she stuck around for as long as she did. Dont count on her coming back though, because girls love doesnt usually come back the same after they give up on you.

I do know I was lucky.

Curious what could have kept you from telling her all those other years, yet now you want her. What were these personal reasons that you couldn't date her. Do you really want her now or is it just the realization that now you CAN'T have her, and you feel like you blew it. I know it's not always easy to understand your own feelings and you probably did your best to do what felt right, but you had such a huge window of opportunity, I don't blame her for not caring much now.

 

You can't stop her from seeing this other guy now. Just have to move on and see if you are ever presented with another opportunity.

I don't want to go into details what the personal reasons are, but due to them, I just wasn't ready to date. I think her leaving this time has made me realize how important she is to me. I don't blame here for leaving though. But as both you and boogieboy said, it's best that I move on now and if the opportunity ever arises again, maybe there's something I can do then.