guy.lepage Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 A lot of things have happened since my last visit on LoveShack. I have split with my wife in May and while the paperwork hasn't been completed yet, I am back on the dating scene. Needless to say, it feels very awkward after all these years. I was talking to a co-worker and mentioned my previous job, where I worked with mostly older women in their fifties and sixties. She smiled and responded that she was much younger, suggesting that her smooth skin was a clear indicator of her age (we are both in our thirties). I kept teasing her for a bit then went back to my office. While I was on my way out, I ran into her and she walked right past me without saying hello. She just blushed and smiled and disappeared. Are these signs of flirting? Being recently separated, I know I am a bit more sensitive then the typical guy and I don't want to over interpret her signals. Thank you all for helping me. Link to post Share on other sites
Mako482 Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 I divorced three years ago and tried dating right after the split, looking back it was a huge mistake. I suggest you take a break and get yourself together. Not sure how long you were married but most people lose their sense of identity and individualism in a marriage, you need to find it again before you start dating. A lot of women won't touch you with a 10 foot pole if they know you just recently separated, you are a liability right now to break some hearts. I strongly suggest putting it off. Link to post Share on other sites
Author guy.lepage Posted August 16, 2008 Author Share Posted August 16, 2008 Thanks Mako. I know I am rather fragile right now but I think that a rebound date is part of the healing process. I was just wondering whether she was showing signs of interest... Link to post Share on other sites
Mako482 Posted August 16, 2008 Share Posted August 16, 2008 Doesn't look like anything so far to me, keep up the flirting around and see where it goes. I disagree that a rebound is part of the healing process though, it is just an initial reaction to replace something you lost, usually all that happens is you end up hurting someone. Link to post Share on other sites
Author guy.lepage Posted August 24, 2008 Author Share Posted August 24, 2008 Finally, I managed to gather enough courage to ask her out. She was being quite flirtatious and I thought I had my chance. Unfortunately she could not make it. She seemed sincere that she would've loved to come along. In the couple days that followed, she remained flirtatious and kept joking around me. A few days later, she invited me to join her and a couple friends of hers for drinks and dinner. How should I view this? Is she interested? Link to post Share on other sites
gfto Posted August 24, 2008 Share Posted August 24, 2008 Doesn't sound like she's interested. When you asked her out, did you ask for a specific time and place? Or did you just vaguely ask her if she'd like to go out sometime? From what I can gather, it sounds like you asked for a specific time and place, and she declined without making an alternate suggestion. That would mean she's not interested. The "group date" is always a bad idea. I would politely decline that invitation and ask her for a real date unless you've already done so (see above) and she declined, in which case, you're out. Link to post Share on other sites
JoeNewbie Posted August 24, 2008 Share Posted August 24, 2008 Doesn't sound like she's interested. When you asked her out, did you ask for a specific time and place? Or did you just vaguely ask her if she'd like to go out sometime? From what I can gather, it sounds like you asked for a specific time and place, and she declined without making an alternate suggestion. That would mean she's not interested. The "group date" is always a bad idea. I would politely decline that invitation and ask her for a real date unless you've already done so (see above) and she declined, in which case, you're out. I was going to answer the same thing but why would she want him to hang out with her friends? And potentially mislead him? Link to post Share on other sites
gfto Posted August 24, 2008 Share Posted August 24, 2008 I was going to answer the same thing but why would she want him to hang out with her friends? She could just want to see if he'll show up, follow her to several clubs, and buy her drinks all night. And, it makes her look good in front of her friends. I've seen it happen many times. Link to post Share on other sites
Balthazar Posted August 24, 2008 Share Posted August 24, 2008 Same thoughts here. The group date is definitely not a good idea; you need time alone with the lady, not in front of people who will inevitably scrutinize you. Make an excuse for the group date. Then continue building rapport with the lady during work, to the degree which that is possible. At an opportune moment, ask her out for dinner with a specific time and date(find out from conversation what kind of food she likes or doesn't like). Cheers, Link to post Share on other sites
JoeNewbie Posted August 25, 2008 Share Posted August 25, 2008 Part of me agrees with gfto and balthazar - although I do think she would go through a lot just for a few free drinks. She knows he's interested (he already asked her out) so why would she voluntarily put herself in such an uncomfortable situation (if she's not interested)? My understanding is that Guy did not ask her out a second time - she initiated it. Seems rather unlikely that she would initiate this just to play around with him - and then risk throwing a work relationship down the toilet. Link to post Share on other sites
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