Hmm... How to break to a friend that I want to date her?

[Gator762]

Sorry for the long post everyone, but this situation is killing me! Thanks for reading!

 

I have a friend at school, whom I've helped a number of times, and had dinner with, and coffee with a few times. I've known her for well over a year, but haven't spent too much time, as I was married. Once we spent an entire day together and we had a great time - as friends. I know at first she wanted to date me, but I was married at the time. Now that I've been separated for a while, I feel like I'm ready to date someone.

 

We've always had a strong attraction for each other. I never intentionally misled her, as I always wore the wedding band. But one day she asked me out, and I had to tell her I was married. She seemed quite a bit disappointed at that. I honestly think she did not know I was married, as I know her pretty well, and she would not ask me out if she knew that I was. She was in a relationship for about 6 months, and I fear that he is trying to get back together with her, even though he treated her pretty bad when he dumped her. Now I have this great sense of urgency, as it feels like I better get on her emotional radar before she considers getting back together with her ex-boyfriend!

 

She was also there for me during my separation... She was great, we met together and she listened to me open my heart up about the situation. I have told her that I'm extremely grateful for that. I don't know if I weirded her out telling her I got her a gift the other day - she said it wasn't necessary, but I told her that I was really grateful for the time she helped me. It was a very inexpensive but thoughtful gift, I know her and I think she will enjoy it.

 

She said she would call me later in the week for coffee, but the waiting is killing me! I haven't told her I would like that to be a date. I'm also afraid that the last time we met, I was quite emotional (aka - wuss!). That was the last time we met out together, and afraid that may have left a lasting impression. I really want to let her know that that I'm normally not such a wuss, and I haven't had the chance to give her the present - I hope that hasn't weirded her out! Would it be too much to call her this weekend? (Worried about competition).

 

I got her the present, because I felt a bit selfish that day. She was such a great listener and a help to me. It was near finals and I was very grateful that she spent the time with me - a true friend.

 

Would it be too much to rescind coffee, and upgrade that to a dinner? Or should I hold out and wait, perhaps ask her to dinner after the coffee? We've known each other for a long time, but I'd be more comfortable doing this over the phone, or in person.