stages in life

[Raindrop100]

Hi have anyone of you came across some stages in life where you are not sure where you are heading to??

 

I am turning 33 this year and started to love what I have studied and worked for over 10 years. I was accounting trained and have kept changing job for the past few years. There were varied reasons for hopping from one job to another. Amongst them were: vast discrepancies in the job scope during and after job interview, stress, unreasonable boss, human relations problem and etc.

 

I have landed in a job that I like most two years ago. Due to company restructuring and language barrier with the new management, I have decided to quit the job. I was asked to stay by my superiors but my mind was set to leave at that point of time.

 

I have attended many job interviews and got some solid offers from some reputable companies. However, I was hesitate to take the offer. Some interviewers have been questioning me why have I been hopping from one job to another, despite the fact that I did get some job offers from other companies. I start to feel puzzled whether accounting is really for me even though I have developed genuine interest in it along the way. I did hear rumours about my ex-superiors bad-mouthing about me even thought they tried hard to make me stay at that point of time. My conscience is clear as I have served enough notice and fulfilled my duties. If I was really that bad, why in the first place they tried so hard to retain me?

 

Many of my old friends have embarked on the new phase of life. Many got married with kids, some set up their own businesses and some migrated overseas and I seem to have lost my way.

 

Anyone out there willing to share some of your thoughts how should I get on my life from here?

[Trialbyfire]

Only you can answer the question of what you want in life versus doing a comparison to your peers. Do you really want to be doing what they're doing?

[Guest]

What did they say about you when they bad mouthed you. Sometimes employers may be disappointed for the lack of loyalty. They don't like to go through the process of hiring and retraining people.

 

Next stage of life - could do what your friends are doing, get married, have kids. Move overseas and work, a change of environment.

 

What goals do you have. Settling down; further advancement in career; career change (but may involve a paycut); financial goals ?

 

Most of my friends are coulped up, married (with kids). I'm still single. I'm planning to work overseas later in the year. A change of environment. Meet over people with similar interest as me (ie travelling). And maybe I'll meet someone as well.

 

Good luck.

[Raindrop100]

What did they say about you when they bad mouthed you. Sometimes employers may be disappointed for the lack of loyalty. They don't like to go through the process of hiring and retraining people.

 

He told my ex-colleague that I have not met his requirements; but ironically, he kept asking me to stay or extend notice period or to be converted to permanent staff there.

 

I chose to leave partly because of his attitude. I found he's rather inexperienced and irresponsible. There were chaos in the subsidiary due to top management's mismanagment and he was sent to investigate and monitor the situation. One day, I saw his stressed face and shortly after that he said to a few of us during lunch break, " I think I better leave early; if not, I will be held responsible if anything goes wrong here".

 

Another instance is that, he always asked a lot of obvious questions on analysis. From the obvious questions that he asked, I was sure he didn't have much experience in this area. But after he got all the clues and understood the working, he would present the analysis to the General Manager and said without blinking the eyes that "look, I am such a good cost accountant." For all your know, the analysis that I submitted to him have not been given any valued-added opinions or modication from his part.

 

Of course, there are many more instances.

 

I recently found out a few of his key staffs have resigned during the same period. They might have the same opinions of him as me.

 

Therefore, may be I shouldn't be bothered so much by his negative comments of me. I have an ex-colleague in another company, who was once in the same boat as me. He used to be his Partner's most favorite staff; but surprisingly, the Partner too, bad-mouthed him after he has left the company.

 

Yes, may be I would just move on and if good luck strikes me, I may just meet a good man and get married and have a family.

 

But I do feel dissapointed and disgusted by the behaviour of some married men that I have met. An ex-collegue and an ex-boss. Both of them are married with kids but yet keep coming after me, may be I should call it a "harrassment". When I told them off, they still don't get the hints and continue to be thick-skinned, I really feel pitiful of their wives and children. Is this a society disease in general?