I have a crush

[ruby_gloom]

On someone I met online.

 

Well, in truth, I didn't "meet" them, per se--I just sort of "found" them.

 

Some months ago, I decided to create a profile on a dating site. In retrospect, I'm not all that sure as to why I proceeded to create a profile on a dating site, given that I was still wasn't, and still am not, over my exbf. In addition to that, it should be said that I am not one who shares the idea that the best way to get over someone is to date others.

 

I do note the contradiction between making a profile on a dating site while still mourning over the loss of my lost love and thinking that dating around in an attempt to get over someone is synonymous for rebounding--which is something I find indignant.

 

Having said that, I honestly believe that the reason why I did so was my subconscious attempt to boost my self-esteem in a way.

 

I put up a picture and replaced the blanks with my information . . . and I actually got noticed. Maybe it was superficial, yes, and perhaps even deceitful in some regard, but it felt good to know that there were other men who found me attractive either in appearance or personality or both. Seeing the "winks" and emails on my homescreen put a bittersweet smile on my face, I must confess.

 

And then one day, there was a "wink" from someone who immediate caught my eye. Mind you, this was some much later down the line; later to the point where I had almost forgotten about going back to check the website.

 

I read through the profile and browsed through the images and I felt "something." I'm not certain I can tell nor describe what that "something" was with exactitude, however. It was just a nice feeling; one that made me smile sweetly and without the bitterness, and which prompted the fleeting thought: "Wouldn't it be nice to get to know him?"

 

Yes, yes it would be. So, then I proceeded to "wink" back, only to immediately realize there would be no way for me to actually ever converse with him in any way, since I wasn't a paying member, and I seriously doubted he was, either.

 

I was actually rather disappointed because, while I am still not over my exbf, he is the first person within a reasonable distance whom I have felt interested in, which is a big deal for me because I find it hard to become interested in guys.

 

So, with that, I felt shot down. How unfortunate it is, I think. Two winks: one from him and one from me. If you put them together, they become a pair of eyes--my pair of eyes which I now must close in order to at least be able to preserve the fantasy of what could have been.

 

Sigh.

 

So, I have a crush on someone I've never even met. And will never meet. I suck.

[Road Rage]

A crush is a mysterious thing isn`t it:confused: But I thought if you became a member you could contact this person. ??? I have never done the online date thingamajig.

 

Had to go to Wikepedia to figure out where Pangaea was:o I thought maybe it was somewhere close to Indonesia:laugh:

 

About a crush.... I believe a crush sometimes develops because the imagination is taking over where real life has not been allowed to roam. There seeems to be a trigger; a glance, touch, sweet words, etc, that make a connection. An emotional void within is craving to be fulfilled.

 

Much romantic literature from countless centuries alludes to this. Players/seducers are well aware of the power of the crush. It is mastery to draw a person into a crush with yourself.

 

But, the strategy is always to find a need, a lack, an unfulfilled desire. It is said you cannot seduce a happy person. In the course of human events, people, both men and women, stumble onto a trigger with someone and a crush ensues. It is as mysterious as the origin of the cosmos.

[burning 4 revenge]

It is as mysterious as the origin of the cosmos.

No it's not. She has a fantasy about some pretty boy, what's so mysterious about that?

[whichwayisup]

Just join the site, maybe he will too once he notices you're a member.

[Storyrider]

Maybe it is time to realign your concerns closer to home, family, and school. And you still don't suck.

[ruby_gloom]

Maybe it is time to realign your concerns closer to home, family, and school.

 

Probably. My concern certainly is with my uh, family and scool, though, even if it may not seem like it. It's just that I love to dote on these things because they are not nearly as troubling as the other things I have to worry about.

 

Plus, I can't help but be a hopeless romantic.

 

And this guy is dreamy. I like to dream about dreamy dreams.

[Storyrider]

Probably. My concern certainly is with my uh, family and scool, though, even if it may not seem like it. It's just that I love to dote on these things because they are not nearly as troubling as the other things I have to worry about.

 

Plus, I can't help but be a hopeless romantic.

 

And this guy is dreamy. I like to dream about dreamy dreams.

 

me too, man.

[tanbark813]

I don't get this:

 

So, I have a crush on someone I've never even met. And will never meet. I suck.

 

So instead of whining about it, pay the money and talk to the guy. What's the issue here?

[burning 4 revenge]

Plus, I can't help but be a hopeless romantic.

Yeah, me too Ruby_Gloom

[ruby_gloom]

me too, man.

 

Isn't it nice?

 

Btw: Where did your thread go?

 

So instead of whining about it, pay the money and talk to the guy. What's the issue here?

 

Oh, I would, but the issue is that he is not a member, either. So, even if I sign up and send him an email or whatever, he won't be able to read it.

 

So . . . it won't work. And that's just not cool, dude.

 

Yeah, me too Ruby_Gloom

 

I thought you had no feelings.

[magichands]

Btw: Where did your thread go?

I missed it! Anybody got a copy of the pre-deleted memory joggings? Sure would like to read it. Retrospectively.

[tanbark813]

Oh, I would, but the issue is that he is not a member, either. So, even if I sign up and send him an email or whatever, he won't be able to read it.

 

So . . . it won't work. And that's just not cool, dude.

 

If you sign up and send him an email he might reciprocate. Carpe diem.

[LN99]

Yeah,sometimes it's nice to just crush on someone. But it can get fustrating as well when nothing happens.

 

Road Rage described the whole thing quite accurately. I know I got a crush out of nowhere a few months ago because of a void.

 

But, I just wonder if we would actually like these guys if we actually got to be with them. Our minds can trick us into making someone SEEM so perfect for us when in reality they might not be.

 

If you really do want to get to know this guy, go for it. I mean, theres not much to lose right?

[Guest]

Perhaps the fact that you 'felt' something signals that you are over your ex... I know for me I was walking around in a daze for a bit not looking at anyone because I was still focused on the ex... I've started thinking 'hey he's cute' and that has made me realise that I'm ready to get back out there!

 

So I would join the site.. you never know he may join as a member or you might meet someone else.

[Storyrider]

Isn't it nice?

 

Btw: Where did your thread go?

 

I don't know!? I have a guess about what happened though.

 

I may have committed a faux pas.

[the_alchemyst]

Uhm.

 

Yea, what happened to your thread, Lucy?

 

*cough*

[ruby_gloom]

If you sign up and send him an email he might reciprocate. Carpe diem.

 

I thought of that but then I realized that when you are not a paying member, you can see that you have emails, but not from who.

 

So, I could send him one, yes, but he won't know it's mine.

 

What would he reciprocate then?

 

Perhaps the fact that you 'felt' something signals that you are over your ex... I know for me I was walking around in a daze for a bit not looking at anyone because I was still focused on the ex... I've started thinking 'hey he's cute' and that has made me realise that I'm ready to get back out there!

 

So I would join the site.. you never know he may join as a member or you might meet someone else.

 

Good point. For a while, I thought that I was beginning to get over the exbf, but the truth is that I'm not.

 

I have a "crush" on this guy, but I still love my exbf. I didn't think this was possible. Then again, I am the whore of the zodiac, so I guess it is.

 

And also, my eyes are set on this one guy (not including the exbf), so really whoever else is on that site is irrelevant. Right now.

 

Does I make sense? (No.)

 

But, I just wonder if we would actually like these guys if we actually got to be with them. Our minds can trick us into making someone SEEM so perfect for us when in reality they might not be.

 

If you really do want to get to know this guy, go for it. I mean, theres not much to lose right?

 

Yes! I often wonder this too. The crush is cute and all in its fantasy realm, but how would it be in the real realm?

 

From what I've read about him (admittedly, it's not much), I like the personality he projects and I think this he's hot. He seems nice and also really smart, and likes videogames and pot--just like me!

 

So, he would seem perfect, especially with his shaggy hair, but I would probably think he's too surreal were I to meet him.

 

I missed it! Anybody got a copy of the pre-deleted memory joggings? Sure would like to read it. Retrospectively.

 

Nope, no copy. But I read something nice about you. Sucks for you.

 

I liked that thread.

 

I don't know!? I have a guess about what happened though.

 

I may have committed a faux pas.

 

?

 

Was it because it was a "popularity" type of thread? I don't think those are allowed, but I don't remember.

 

Either way, I don't see the violation.

 

But then again, I have no storage memory.

 

Well, not for useful things, anyway.

 

Hmm. I wonder if smoke signals can reach him...

[Blue Phoenix]

Um I'm guilty of useing them kinda sites once or twice myself in the past. And I dunno if you can say the name here but many of them actualy do allow you to contact people. You just have to figure out how and def if your a paying member you can contact some one even if there not. So I don't see the prob here eather maybe sceared to take the 1st step?? If you were realy that taken by him and thats a rare thing for you then wouldent it be worth the say 20 somthing bucks to find out it theres anything there?? Or are you simply content to have a fantisey man??

[tanbark813]

I thought of that but then I realized that when you are not a paying member, you can see that you have emails, but not from who.

 

So, I could send him one, yes, but he won't know it's mine.

 

What would he reciprocate then?

 

Well hopefully pessimism and self-pity will land you your dream guy some day.

[Blue Phoenix]

--"From what I've read about him (admittedly, it's not much), I like the personality he projects and I think this he's hot. He seems nice and also really smart, and likes videogames and pot--just like me!"-- Ok 1st off be carefull don't let your self fall too deep into "the personality he projects" or his looks before you actualy met him. I could say I'm miss universe 2008 to on one of them sites dosent mean im the real deal. Just keep your head about things you see on line thats all I'm trying to say there.. And second I don't personaly get how shared drug use if a huge plus in any relashionship that actualy might go some weres but hey thats just me I guess lol...

[ruby_gloom]

Well hopefully pessimism and self-pity will land you your dream guy some day.

 

I can only hope.

 

BP: Really? I would pay $20 bucks to send him and email if I knew he was going to read it . . . even if nothing else happened afterwards, I'd know that I tried, at least.

 

Maybe I just don't know how to go about it. From what I've read on the website, you can only send/read emails if you're a paying member. So, if I subscribe, then I could send one to him, but in order for him to be able to read it or even see who it's from, he would have to be a subscriber, too, which he's not.

 

That's how I understand it, anyway, but maybe I'm wrong. Hmm...

[Blue Phoenix]

Well whats the name of the site?? I've looked and use a few of them maybe I can help..

[ruby_gloom]

EDIT: You have more good points BP. The thing that interests me the most about him is the personality he projects. I understand that he might not be this way, yes, but then again he might. It's a gamble, I suppose.

 

If I were to meet him, I'd be more realistic about things--definitely.

 

Plus, his aura is white.

 

(And I'm insane.)

 

Also, about the weed, I was just trying to be funny, but I fail at comedy.

 

EDIT 2: I put the name in my original post, but it was deleted. I guess I can't make direct references. It rhymes with patch, though.

[Storyrider]

 

I liked that thread.

Was it because it was a "popularity" type of thread? I don't think those are allowed, but I don't remember.

 

Either way, I don't see the violation.

 

I'm guessing, but I think it was more of a "Rumplestiltskin" type problem. Or you know the chorus of that Rolling Stone song "Sympathy for The Devil?"

 

I wonder if I could start it again in a more benign form?

 

Idea: If you know the town where your crush lives you could go on Craig's List Missed Connections and try to leave a message for him there.

[tanbark813]

EDIT 2: I put the name in my original post, but it was deleted. I guess I can't make direct references. It rhymes with patch, though.

 

I use that site. Even if he's not a paying member he'll still see who the message is from and get an email notification. Actually, I think he'll be able to read the message in his email. He just won't be able to respond without paying.

 

(And am I just slow or is this the_alchemyst?)