Hopefully A new chapter with this person

[kara45445]

Hello everyone. I was on here last year in september for a couple of months. I really got lots of help on here from reading other posts and getting a better understanding of what WE all go through. Hurt, Pain, Laughter, Tears, Joy, Fear and in the end we still find a way to move foward and heal. We all heal in different ways.

 

Some barry the hurt they have far inside and others move after the pain is gone. As for me I barried my hurt inside. My Ex had left me last year because we were having major problems in our 1 1/2 yr relationship. I have grown since then and learned so much since last year in September. I am able to see what I did wrong and what I know my ex did wrong. He got back in touch with his ex of 4 yrs and from that point he wanted nothing to do with me. I went just about crazy for one because he left me , but for getting clsoe to his EX again.

 

and I hurt 20 times more then if he would have left and had no one by his side. So anyways me crying and begging led to a bad ugly break up. Dec of 06 came and i tried again to get him back. DIDN'T work !!!. so come jan i was slowly starting to get better by barring my pain inside me but always longing for him to be in my arms. He changed his number he put a no contact order on me in Jan of 06. So i left him alone. so since sept. of 06 to jan of 07 you would think i could heal and move on, WELL not so easily.

 

I met others and went out yes i did and I had fun. I knew I could find anyone and start a new fresh relationship. I was going shopping and buying anything i wanted and i even started school part time which i am still going. He never once called. NEVER once called. I suppose that makes scense because he was that one who called it off. Well me and my stubborness made me call him around Feb 17th of 07..to see how he was. I called at work because that is the only number I have for him.

 

So I called nervously. He answered and I asked how are you. He said your not supposed to be doing this. I told him i know but i wanted to tell you i miss you and can we please talk. he asked why. I told him because I am hurt still and i just want to talk. He asked well when. So the next night we had dinner together. It was amazing how he said ok to the whole deal since we are not supposed to be talking because of courts and all.

 

Well we chatted and he talked about how tired he is at work he works long hours. I asked about his friend (EX). well he stated i want you to know it was nothing sexual i needed someone to be a friend with and well i thought she was that friend. She stoled some medication from me. He takes Vicodin for his back pain. So being good friends again for 5 months then she ups and takes a whole bottle of vicodin from you. he said yes. and i was shocked. I was thinking why would she do that. She was actually wanted him back i felt. He said he never wants to talk to her again. i asked him that if he would like we can be friends.

 

good true honest friends. He looked at him and cried. He said I hurt him terribly. all my screaming and accusations hurt him to the point where he broke down at work. I told him i was sorry. for all the problems. He said it didnt' have to come to the point of the courts, but I had no other choice, u wouldnt leave me alone at the time. I thought about it and i agreed. We so currently we are on good terms. He is gaining is trust in me. He told me i want ur friendship if that is seriously what you mean.

 

I told him yes. As much As i love him, I am now content and okay with a frienship with him. I want to be there for him. I told him that i needed a friend too. We agreed to be friends. He also apologized that when he lashes out at me its not me, its him and he says he gets upset with himself about work and everything and that its not meant for me.

 

So as of now we are friends and I hope we remain friends, whatever the future holds for us both. Thanks to loveshack for helping me cope when me and my ex were totally apart. if if wasn't for this website i don't know what I would have done.