J.LO Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 This guy and I have been just friends for a while, and we finally have actually told eachother we like one another. The thing is sometimes he is soo nice and sticks up for me and everything, and then the next second he can be rude and say fine I dont wanna talk to you now. Talk about mood swings. I dont know what to do, because we arent dating, and he has that maybe we will, but the thing is iam not sure how to feel for him when he acts like a snot sometimes. Other times we are having a great conversation, it's like he thinks he has to be in control or get what he wants..he isnt the type that would beg. I asked him before why he does this and he says he doesnt, and then we just fight. It's like he likes us arguing. And he does sometimes, he does it on purpose. WHat's the fun of making me mad? And then he does apolize at times too for doing it depending on if we got really mean and started dissing eachother. Anyways thanks and hopefully someone can help me. Link to post Share on other sites
princesspeaches Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 maybe he's bipolar. Or maybe he has multiple personalities. I'm not sure I'd stay friends with someone who's switch was flipped so easily, but thats just my feeling. Link to post Share on other sites
Raleuse Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 This guy and I have been just friends for a while, and we finally have actually told eachother we like one another. The thing is sometimes he is soo nice and sticks up for me and everything, and then the next second he can be rude and say fine I dont wanna talk to you now. Talk about mood swings. I dont know what to do, because we arent dating, and he has that maybe we will, but the thing is iam not sure how to feel for him when he acts like a snot sometimes. Other times we are having a great conversation, it's like he thinks he has to be in control or get what he wants..he isnt the type that would beg. I asked him before why he does this and he says he doesnt, and then we just fight. It's like he likes us arguing. And he does sometimes, he does it on purpose. WHat's the fun of making me mad? And then he does apolize at times too for doing it depending on if we got really mean and started dissing eachother. Anyways thanks and hopefully someone can help me. The guy who used to be my best friend is like that. First thing I noticed was how disrespectful he was to people close to him (but a sweetheart to strangers). I then realised he's a control freak. Wanted me to stay with him, to know who I called or texed, where I went, etc. I thought it was because he cared (silly me) Then he'd say hurtful/belittling things - started when he realised that I had fallen in love with him - and then would go into huge arguments if I tried and defended myself or even just tell him I don't appreciate being made fun of or ridiculed. Our fights became worse with time and my frustration at not only not being loved back but being constantly put down. I think it's on LS that someone pointed out to me he was being abusive and full of contempt and not really such a good friend. I looked into it and realised I had been sucked in the chaos of abuse without realising it. All because I was blinded by my feelings. I was lacking sleep and in a bad mood all the time which he of course argued with me about even more. Now that I have kind of detached a bit, I look at him and see how he picks fights with everyone. They always will do something that he deems stupid/bad and he'll start aguing. It's never his fault either - with me, it was because I was so moody and unable to take a joke and mentally ill (I was for falling in love with him). I'm telling you all this because I am seeing a few red flags here with your friend so beware. Mood swings are one thing but he could be like my guy and have some personality disorder or at least display some tendencies. Those people are very good at trapping those around them as if they were their prey. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 The thing is sometimes he is soo nice and sticks up for me and everything, and then the next second he can be rude and say fine I dont wanna talk to you now. Talk about mood swings. He definitely sounds like he has a mental disorder. And you haven't even started dating seriously. I would stay away from him if I were you. His behavior is alarming. Link to post Share on other sites
RecordProducer Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 I then realised he's a control freak. Wanted me to stay with him, to know who I called or texed, where I went, etc. I thought it was because he cared (silly me) I think it's on LS that someone pointed out to me he was being abusive and full of contempt and not really such a good friend. He was just your friend and wanted to know who called you and where you went? Don't you hate it when friends do that? I mean, it's normal for lovers to be jealous, but friends who are possessive....? Link to post Share on other sites
Author J.LO Posted March 6, 2007 Author Share Posted March 6, 2007 First thing I noticed was how disrespectful he was to people close to him (but a sweetheart to strangers). Thanks for the heads up on all that stuff. The thing is, he doesnt disrespect his friends or strangers. He's very nice to them actually. It's more of his friends that disrespect him. They make fun of him if he loses or does something that he enjoys. (sports) I just dont know why he does it to me, because he can be so nice. Then we can be talking and if someone else yells at me he would say something to them, but if he wants to snap at me, it's okay. Maybe you guys are right and he has some kind of disorder. And my first thing is i dont want to believe it, but I know that it could be true. I guess I wont be dating him now, and afew of my friends think he's obessed now because he knows little things that most people wouldnt pick up on. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted March 6, 2007 Share Posted March 6, 2007 Run away as fast as you can. You are looking for an excuse to hang on. If he's like that with you now as a friend can you imagine what it'll be like if you were his girlfriend? He doesn't it like being called on his behavior. Like most control freaks. They either deny it or in the future it'll be YOUR fault. You can't change him or love him enough to make this go away. If you become romantically involved with him the magic eight ball predicts alot of heartache in your future. As the saying goes: when someone shows you who they are. Believe them. Link to post Share on other sites
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