with boyfriend two years does he love me or not

[mtbutterflyrose]

Ive been with my boyfriend two years now and he has never said I love you to my face. As the years pass by I get more and more worried of what he wants from me. The other day was his 37th birthday and we went out drinking and I had said to him," You'll still love me tomorrow right." and he replied," We'll talk about that tomorrow."

 

Also, a few months ago we were talking on the internet and I just flat out told him that I loved him and his reply was<"I love you, but dont expect me to say it everyday." I mean com'on what is that all about? He has even brought up several times that we should move in together and once we even set a date and he backed out. I dont believe that I was ready either to move in with him in another town.

 

He is so wishwashy on the hole us thing one minute and the next minute he seems to have a plan for us. I have already left him (once) a year ago to try to get some type of knowledge of how he feels about me. At first it was cold and it seemed to me that according to him I was replaceable. And yet a few months later he was hunting me down asking me out again. I am so confused of what to think.

 

Some people say it is our age difference: i am 27, ten years younger then him. I do see the age difference when we go out partying and his idea of a good time is one beer and off to bed. Ha ha. Mine is stay up most of the night and talk and dance and flirt or even go bowling or play pool. I find so many levels of connection with him and the thought of him possibly not loving me breaks my heart.

 

I try not to lead on that it hurts and keep all bottled up and thats not good either. He did say a few months ago: I think you care about me more then i do you." It hurt me but it was probably the truth coming out. I dont know what to do! Should I stay with him even though he doesnt know what he wants. or should I leave and possibly have regrets? I know that I do love him and it would be nice to have our relationship more secure and validated. I just dont understand him:( .

[Guest]

All i can say...is that you need to love yourself first.

Its not huge validation that you are seeking... its just the normal emotion

of wanting your love reflected back towards you. That is soooo perfectly normal

...but to keep yourself in a relationship that is not even

fullfilling the simplest request of hearing the words I love you...

then you are NOT Loving yourself.

 

Any man is attracted to a woman who is confident and knows

exactly what she wants and what she deserves...and you aren't asking

for a ring nor a mansion...you are asking to recipocrate something

that he should naturally be wanting to give.

 

Please don't waste your time making excuses of why you should stay.

You are young.. love your self...know your self...

and the MEN in your life will notice.

 

Leaving him is not the end all and be all either...you never know..

he might react once again... and maybe he will say i love you.

 

If he doesn't then its his loss.

 

If he can't imagine why you would leave ....then something must have

seriously gone wrong in his past..where he doesn't allow himself to

really be vulnerable...but that is not your job to fix.

 

Let him evolve and you can evolve too.

[norajane]

He sounds like a commitment phobic person to me. If that's the case, he may not ever be able to give you what you want.

 

If he told you "I think you care about me more then i do you", believe him. He's telling you the truth.

 

Don't stay with him if you're unhappy.