Obsession? Or Deep Like?

[J.LO]

I recently wrote a post called "A Joy In Arguing". I got good advice from some people on LS. And iam grateful for that information.

 

The thing is, everyone is telling me that the guy is obsessed with me. The thing is I dont see it at all! How? It's not like he's following me around. And doesnt try and come talk to me at school, and he also wants me near his friends in order to date.

 

This is the story:

We;ve known eachother for years, and we were in the stage of "playing Games". Childish i kno. Anyways, now we are at the point where him and i are closer, admitted feelings and chat a lot more now on computer.

 

We get along sometimes great, and other times he can be out of nowheres such a jerk. It's like he has mood swings. He doesnt do it to his friends, or others, like strangers. He only gets snappy with me, and he tries to make us argue and pretend it's not him that's doing it. It's always me. Unless it gets out of hand and then he'll apolize if we get mean towards eachother.

 

We are closer on msn..we tend to talk sex sometimes. I like the fact that we've become closer, and at least he doesn't think bad things about me like other guys do that are hipocrites. Theres a guy in my class that will diss me, or anyone that disses me, he would stand up and defend me.

 

I got really scared when I wrote my other thread(the one i mentioned above) because of people thinking he is obsessed. How can he be though?

 

I know he shouldn't say mean things, but we do make up as in just talking normally. And now we are getting closer, except he wants me to get closer to him, by getting closer to his friends.

 

I don't just fall for any guy, and I've tried soo many times to just forget about him, especailly when he makes me soo mad because he can be a jerk. But everyone has flaws right?

 

Iam usually very smart when it comes to this kind of stuff, but i dont know about this situation at all.

 

One more thing is that he rembmers little things that other people wouldnt pick up on, like what colour gloves i wear and stuff like that, just to prove it really is him that iam talkin to on computer because once his friend was on pretending to be him but i knew it wasnt him and he told me that.

 

Anyways, what are your thoughts? And thanks for the help.

[Raleuse]

You know him a lot better than we do and he might just be cyclotimic (which is bad enough IMO but it's up to you to want to put up with it - as long as you know what you're getting into).

 

I admit he doesn't sound like he's obsessed.

 

I read a couple of articles yesterday that I found eye-openers. http://www.drirene.com/obsessed_love.htm

 

As you can read, there are many types of 'obsessed' lovers (I'm the codependent type and my friend is the narcissist type) so see if you can find a description that sounds like your friend.

 

I also read your reply to my post on your other thread and you are saying he's nice to everyone else... here's another article that I found useful.

http://www.drirene.com/spot_abuser_date.htm