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For all you Nice Guys Out there


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The nice guys and jerks finish last and the balanced guy will finish first.

Absolutely... and as you know Riddler I think I have got me a winner!

Yippee!

 

Kindness and attentiveness should NEVER take the place of being real, independent, strong and capable. They can all very easily go hand-in-hand, and should. Anygthing else is disingenuous.

Trying to impress solely for purposes of getting laid or getting romantic attention is not really being true to yourself or the other person. Are they still going to find you attractive when you're not in character and on stage? That's the acid test!

Ain't that the truth...

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When women say they want a 'nice guy' they're making an understatement. And for the guys who misunderstand this are the ones that get burned...and when they do they come out the ashes as a better man, hopefully for their sake anyway. And when women say they want a 'bad boy' they're making an overstatement.

 

But it is true, when the term nice guy comes to mind people automatically equate that with stability and boredom. and the badboy stereotype will usually equate spontaneity and rebel.

 

A true man will incorporate the 2 characteristics and make it who he is. It happens naturally through life's trials and tribulations which is a sum of his personality, character, and flaws.

 

Very nicely and truthfully put.

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Absolutely... and as you know Riddler I think I have got me a winner!

Yippee!

 

Good for you.:)

 

Is any credit for that owed to the fine people here at LS?

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Good for you.:)

 

Is any credit for that owed to the fine people here at LS?

 

I think so, in an indirect way.

 

LS helped me get over my exMM and see how STUPID I was to be with him. Its helped me as a person in many ways.

 

LS has also helped me appreciate what a good thing I have got going with wonderboy in a number of ways.... when I hear about how NOT to treat someone, and how bad some peoples Rs are, I know I have got a good one, but also when I read about people with good R's that seem to work well, and have stood the test of time, I can apply that to my current R too.

Call it positive reinforcement.

 

Fanfare over! :D

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I think so, in an indirect way.

 

LS helped me get over my exMM and see how STUPID I was to be with him. Its helped me as a person in many ways.

 

LS has also helped me appreciate what a good thing I have got going with wonderboy in a number of ways.... when I hear about how NOT to treat someone, and how bad some peoples Rs are, I know I have got a good one, but also when I read about people with good R's that seem to work well, and have stood the test of time, I can apply that to my current R too.

Call it positive reinforcement.

 

Fanfare over! :D

 

Your welcome.:D

 

BTW, expect a bill in the mail for my advice. I expect to see a CHECK sometime next week.:laugh::p

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Your welcome.:D

 

BTW, expect a bill in the mail for my advice. I expect to see a CHECK sometime next week.:laugh::p

 

Or do you mean a CHEQUE?

 

For ONE MILLION DOLLARS mooohawahawhawhaw

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Or do you mean a CHEQUE?

 

For ONE MILLION DOLLARS mooohawahawhawhaw

 

No not a CHEQUE, a CHECK.:laugh:

 

It has to be for three million dollars and killing dogs is not required.:laugh:

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No not a CHEQUE, a CHECK.:laugh:

 

It has to be for three million dollars and killing dogs is not required.:laugh:

 

what about licking their butts? that thread was ages ago you have a good memory!

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what about licking their butts? that thread was ages ago you have a good memory!

 

:lmao:

Thats not required either.

 

I am still 25, so my memory is still somewhat intact.:o:laugh:

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It doesn't take long. I am already leaving myself notes aournd the house to remind myself of things.

 

1. breathe in

2. breathe out

3. The car keys are in the fruit bowl

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It doesn't take long. I am already leaving myself notes aournd the house to remind myself of things.

 

1. breathe in

2. breathe out

3. The car keys are in the fruit bowl

 

:lmao: :lmao:

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Salicious Crumb

On the other hand, when I've gone for the bad boy types, who seem a lot more aloof about the relationship, but spontaneously do something really nice, or give me compliments sporatically, when I feel that I've earned it means a lot more and just melts my heart.

 

And then the bad boy screws you over and all of a sudden hes an as$$hole.

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Salicious Crumb
Word.

 

The current girl I'm seeing stopped seeing the guy before me partially because, in her words, "He had no masculine qualities." She then went on to say that, "All girls want the aŠŠhole who will be nice to her." .

 

sweet...so I should become an as$$hole!! Maybe I'll have more fun that way!

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Salicious Crumb
The nice guys and jerks finish last and the balanced guy will finish first.

 

uh huh..until that bad boy cheats on ya...then you change your mind.

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uh huh..until that bad boy cheats on ya...then you change your mind.

 

 

Many times women will forgive the bad boy thinking he will come to his senses and want only her. She sees him as a man other women want but she has him. She sees the nice guy as always there if/when she wants him. We all seem to want someone who others want but don't appreciate the ones who just care for us and want to be with us.

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The problem with nice guys is that they idealize women. There are just as many female players and no good women as there are no good men but nice guys think that all women are being mistreated and they think they will be the one knight in shining that will show a woman what love is. This strategy almost never works. I can be a nice guy and I have a woman that appeciates that side of me but she has to be worth it. Nice guys will let a woman see this side no matter how badly she treats him and that is why keep getting hurt every time.

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goodbrother
The problem with nice guys is that they idealize women. There are just as many female players and no good women as there are no good men but nice guys think that all women are being mistreated and they think they will be the one knight in shining that will show a woman what love is.

 

I believe that.

 

I used to be something of that kind of nice guy. But I've learned since. And I've decided that I'm really not going to cater to women of any kind anymore. I will still be polite and such, but I'm not initiating or engaging in any form of non professional relation ship with any woman indefinitely. I'd rather find myself attaing knowledge, practicing my art & music skills, trading stocks, and making money. Then I'd still be more than happy to deliver a shy "nice guy" smile and turn down any woman who comes my way. Hows that for showing a woman what love is. My nice guy soloution is that I have goals for myself and am content with them.

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Lame guys, or guys who are too predictible are the ones who finish last.

 

I dated a guy like this. The compliments were so generic and overdone. For example, he would say I looked nice every time we went out, even if I was just lounging in my pj's. I loved it at first, thought it was fantastic, but soon I just ended up rolling my eyes, because it really lost it's meaning, and was just expected.

 

On the other hand, when I've gone for the bad boy types, who seem a lot more aloof about the relationship, but spontaneously do something really nice, or give me compliments sporatically, when I feel that I've earned it means a lot more and just melts my heart.

 

Well looks like I am in for some serious hurt here in life. I WANT to be predictable in a way, as in loyalty. I believe there is a certain comfort level that needs to be reached between a girl and any guy, bad boy or not. I do not go overboard in complimenting a woman on her looks or personality, but do it only when I feel that way. It is not often, and not with just with any girl.

 

There is always meaning behind what I say, else I wouldn't say it. So many people fire out these things with nothing to back it up IMO. That's why I say this. I am trying to convey that there may be 1 or 2 guys that still say things they mean and are sincere (and getting laid is not their motivation, the woman is). I feel bad for the ladies that have to differentiate between the two, but also I'm one of the guys that get lost in the shuffle when the motives are genuine.

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Good. You shouldn't want to and sound like a decent guy.

 

I like dating nice guys but to an extent. I can only take so much niceness. Need nice guy and bad boy type mixed into one person. ;)

 

Speaking for nice guys, they don't chase after just any woman. If you've caught his eye, everything he says is the honest-to-God truth and he will do what you say (to an extent). I quite frankly have a hard time distinguishing between a "nice girl" and a woman who is trying to tell me what I want to hear. Women must feel the same way.

 

The thing I try to do to set me apart from the pretenders is to say what's on my mind and never waiver. Back it all up. That scares women because they haven't ever seen that before. Then you run. Instead of doing that, wait out the nice guy. You will lose. Or win, as I like to think!

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Women see niceness as weakness in a guy. They want a guy to make them feel safe and protected and the bad boy type of guy fits their model of man.

A jerk guy comes across as confident and this sends a message to a girl that he can take care of her. The typical nice guy is more shy and not as confident so he gets overlooked for a date but makes a great friend.

 

You need to get a balance of being nice but showing your masculinity.

 

I respect your comment, but as a nice guy, I can be an ass to anyone who provokes me. I do not see the need to aggressively pick a fight with somebody whom I have no bones with. I will fight anybody who has a problem with me, but I get along with just about anybody. I will protect a woman's honor at the first chance as well as her safety.

 

She should realize this when I say the things to her I say. I am not saying I am a weak wuss. I can take care of a woman and treat her with respect and dignity is what I am saying! This is exactly what I don't understand! I think it is possible to be both of what you are saying.

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Ha ha.....six weeks ago I meet new girl. On 1st date I tell her "I don't do friends thing with women".

 

She replies "Oh, Alpha...its too soon to know where this is headed.."

 

Tonite I will be having sex with her. :)

 

Rock on, brother!

I am not usually one to be friends with a lady either, but I do have a few women friends. I am a big believer in every guy wants to get with a female "friend", but there are always exceptions. This nice guy has many alpha qualities as well as some beta (I guess you'd call it) qualities.

 

I strive to be the best of both worlds. I guess that's why it is harder for women to believe. I am confident in every way that one day a lady will see it is possible, because it is.

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Many times women will forgive the bad boy thinking he will come to his senses and want only her. She sees him as a man other women want but she has him. She sees the nice guy as always there if/when she wants him. We all seem to want someone who others want but don't appreciate the ones who just care for us and want to be with us.

 

This makes me sick. I think a guy should always be there for the woman he loves. I could care less who others want. When I'm into a lady, I want only her. I always wanted to believe women felt like this too, but seeing all this stuff in LS, I am really disconnected from reality. I guess I would fit into the latter description of what you're saying except the reagard for what other people think. Just MHO.

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The problem with nice guys is that they idealize women. There are just as many female players and no good women as there are no good men but nice guys think that all women are being mistreated and they think they will be the one knight in shining that will show a woman what love is. This strategy almost never works. I can be a nice guy and I have a woman that appeciates that side of me but she has to be worth it. Nice guys will let a woman see this side no matter how badly she treats him and that is why keep getting hurt every time.

 

You hit the nail on the head, brother! That about sums it up. I just like to think that any woman I agree to date is worth it else I wouldn't have agreed to see her.

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uh huh..until that bad boy cheats on ya...then you change your mind.

 

The bad boy is not the balanced guy. A guy that is at least a majority bad boy is more then likely a jerk.

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Rooster_DAR
Many times women will forgive the bad boy thinking he will come to his senses and want only her. She sees him as a man other women want but she has him. She sees the nice guy as always there if/when she wants him. We all seem to want someone who others want but don't appreciate the ones who just care for us and want to be with us.

 

I can totally agree with this, and I'm guilty of this as everyone else is. I have made some fundamental changes in my basis of thinking since this epiphany, let's see what happens. Also, maturity play in here as well.

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