bridget_jones Posted March 31, 2007 Share Posted March 31, 2007 And thanks Mike, your point is a good one. We both get the sex, he gets sex, $$ and presents. Whoa. Wait a minute now. There's a money exchange going on here, too? You're paying him to sleep with you? I'm confused. Editing this to say I re-read your original post. So this guy is broke and asks you to give him money? WTF??? Sounds like a winner you have here. And you are so naive. Not only does he get sex, he gets money to boot??? I repeat...WTF??? Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted March 31, 2007 Share Posted March 31, 2007 Whoa. Wait a minute now. There's a money exchange going on here, too? You're paying him to sleep with you? I'm confused. Editing this to say I re-read your original post. So this guy is broke and asks you to give him money? WTF??? Sounds like a winner you have here. And you are so naive. Not only does he get sex, he gets money to boot??? I repeat...WTF??? I re-read the post too and it seems this guy is a real LOSER. His cash gravy train * stopped * when she stopped talking to him and sexxing him up so then he starts * persuing * her again. I call this * SFWB = Shameless Friends with Benefits. No FWB recipient should be stalking your cash . At best good sex but this guy is getting more than Poontanga ! Link to post Share on other sites
blue16 Posted March 31, 2007 Share Posted March 31, 2007 But the more I am with him the more I care about him as a person, even though I don't want to be exclusive with him. It's hard to explain. I want the sex, I want his attention, I guess I want it all w/o actually being in a relationship. So basically you want all the things a normal BF would offer you, except you also want the ability to go and meet other guys too? Oh and I'm presuming you'd want him to remain single during this whole process? Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted March 31, 2007 Share Posted March 31, 2007 So basically you want all the things a normal BF would offer you, except you also want the ability to go and meet other guys too? Oh and I'm presuming you'd want him to remain single during this whole process? She wants the sex but no hassles from a man she likely sees as bad boyfriend material. Link to post Share on other sites
nicki Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Smokin' hot sex, after a time, just isn't enough.... I've never been in a FWB situation, but I've been tempted with an ex who was amazing in bed...and I really missed the sex! After thinking about it, I decided if he isn't good enough to be my boyfriend, then he isn't good enough to give my body to. And it wouldn't be fair to use him for sex either. But it was soooo tempting. Plus, I knew it would be a matter of time before I'd be sending cards and accepting bad treatment like you are, all in the hope that he would see me as his girlfriend. Or I would convince myself he was my boyfriend. Sex can do crazy things to us! Like make us bond to bad men who aren't good relationship material. "All or nothing" is my motto. And these days, I prefer being alone to being in half a relationship. (Plus, there are always sex toys for those horny nights in between. I'm bad. Sorry:eek:) Really, though, I think maybe you aren't being honest with yourself. You sound like a woman who is in love with this guy, or at least wants a real relationship with him....so don't settle for less. You deserve to have what you want. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Smokin' hot sex, after a time, just isn't enough.... I've never been in a FWB situation, but I've been tempted with an ex who was amazing in bed...and I really missed the sex! After thinking about it, I decided if he isn't good enough to be my boyfriend, then he isn't good enough to give my body to. And it wouldn't be fair to use him for sex either. But it was soooo tempting. Plus, I knew it would be a matter of time before I'd be sending cards and accepting bad treatment like you are, all in the hope that he would see me as his girlfriend. Or I would convince myself he was my boyfriend. Sex can do crazy things to us! Like make us bond to bad men who aren't good relationship material. "All or nothing" is my motto. And these days, I prefer being alone to being in half a relationship. (Plus, there are always sex toys for those horny nights in between. I'm bad. Sorry:eek:) Really, though, I think maybe you aren't being honest with yourself. You sound like a woman who is in love with this guy, or at least wants a real relationship with him....so don't settle for less. You deserve to have what you want. " All or Nothing " means you will be getting laid alot less Link to post Share on other sites
bridget_jones Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Original poster, you really have to think about what's going on here and what you want. I am not condemning FWB relationships. It's just that those work if both parties agree there are no expectations beyond sex of the other person. This guy asking you for money, and then treating you the way he has....that just wouldn't be acceptable to me. Link to post Share on other sites
LaDiva Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 He's saying sweet and nice things not out of showing emotion, but because he wants to get laid, hon. I'm glad to know that we all know this guy so well. I don't think that he has to "butter her up" to have FWB. OP just said that she isn't ready to give up on the sex either. I think that he is quite aware and OP has made it quite apparent that she is open... so to speak... Guys who are really into a woman don't go a whole weekend without calling, and coming over to hang out, watch movies, and have sex is not emotions, either, it's him wantin' his sex. the being "sweet" and "emotional" as you call it is him keeping you on the line to keep giving him sex. Ice age abstract thought in motion... I like a guy a whole lot, and the feeling IS reciprocated, but because I need time to myself (I'm on a sabbatical from MEN && SEX) I train myself not to call him so much, or not to pick up the phone everytime he calls. It's important to showcase that you have a life, I mean what were you doing before you met this character... the good men, I think, are excited about women who do stuff... its the tubs of lard men, who get excited about women that they have to do everything for. When he buys you roses and asks you out for dinner and calls you daily and wants to date you without it always involving sex, then let us know. Its quite common for men to be um... clueless about what to do in these situations. I'm not saying that he's into you, into you... and I'm not saying that he isn't... but what if... since you've already crossed the line of physical intimacy... he just doesn't know what to do from there? Roses and dinner and the calls daily are for people who are trying to get some, which would bring me back to my original question...lol.. why would he need to go the extra mile to try to get some if he's already getting it? && I say that in truth and trying to not sound hurtful. I think you were on the right track for NC. Look what a week did???!!!!! But this time I think that you should be more serious about it. I mean, sure you enjoy the sex, but I think that you would enjoy much more from him, no? So, put his bum on NC.. and actually do things that would allow you to not have contact with him, join a new gym, volunteer, get a new hobby, something!!!!!!!! (I know its hard because you work with him, but you just have to try my dear.) Link to post Share on other sites
Author Not_That_Innocent Posted April 2, 2007 Author Share Posted April 2, 2007 I'm glad to know that we all know this guy so well. I don't think that he has to "butter her up" to have FWB. OP just said that she isn't ready to give up on the sex either. I think that he is quite aware and OP has made it quite apparent that she is open... so to speak... Ice age abstract thought in motion... I like a guy a whole lot, and the feeling IS reciprocated, but because I need time to myself (I'm on a sabbatical from MEN && SEX) I train myself not to call him so much, or not to pick up the phone everytime he calls. It's important to showcase that you have a life, I mean what were you doing before you met this character... the good men, I think, are excited about women who do stuff... its the tubs of lard men, who get excited about women that they have to do everything for. Its quite common for men to be um... clueless about what to do in these situations. I'm not saying that he's into you, into you... and I'm not saying that he isn't... but what if... since you've already crossed the line of physical intimacy... he just doesn't know what to do from there? Roses and dinner and the calls daily are for people who are trying to get some, which would bring me back to my original question...lol.. why would he need to go the extra mile to try to get some if he's already getting it? && I say that in truth and trying to not sound hurtful. I think you were on the right track for NC. Look what a week did???!!!!! But this time I think that you should be more serious about it. I mean, sure you enjoy the sex, but I think that you would enjoy much more from him, no? So, put his bum on NC.. and actually do things that would allow you to not have contact with him, join a new gym, volunteer, get a new hobby, something!!!!!!!! (I know its hard because you work with him, but you just have to try my dear.) Hey, thanks! After last night I have decided to go back to NC - hard core this time and I'm not going to fall for his sweet talk!! I called him last night crying and upset over something that happened. He asked if I wanted to come over, so I did. As crazy as it may souund given my previous posts, I did not go over there for sex. I just needed a friend, someone to talk to. Remember, I was upset. I walked in the door and the first thing he said to me was I want you to cook for me. It caught me off guard but I said okay. Then he asked me what happened, as far as why I was upset. I told him and his response was that he didn't know what to say. Okay - no harm in that, but that was it. Everything turned into what he wanted. We bantered back and forth about what he wanted me to cook. He got frustrated because he wanted steak, baked potato and a salad and I didn't feel like making all that. His kitchen was a mess, therefore I wasn't motivated to go through the work of such a big meal. He said forget it and decided to make just a salad. That's where he got me, because he knew that I would feel bad for frustrating him. So while he ate his salad I agreed to clean the kitchen, which I didn't really mind because the mess was driving me nuts and I felt like it would be theraputic to keep busy. What I did mind was the fact that he essentially manipulated me into wanting to do it. Right then and there I realized, hey - this guy is an expert at manipulating me. But wait - there's more! He finished up the salad and was still hungry so he said he was going to make chicken once the kitchen clean. So I'm in the kitchen and he's lying on the couch calls for me to turn on the oven and clean out the pan he wanted to use for chicken. While I was doing that, he was falling asleep so I got the chicken ready and put it in the oven. The whole time he was asleep and I didn't want to wake him so I entertained myself by watching the movie he had going. When the chicken was about done I tried to wake him up, but I did so subtly by rubbing his hands and legs. Looking back I should have just shouted HEY - WAKE UP! There I was gently trying to wake him up and he says in a very rude voice - STOP DOING THAT PLEASE! I said fine, I'm leaving -just wanted to wake you up because the oven is still on. I start to walk out the door and he asked if the chicken was done. I told him just about and he asked if I was mad and sorry for falling asleep. I said no problem, I'm leaving - just wanted to let you know the oven is still on. He says (in a very rude voice) - SO WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST TURN OFF THE OVEN. So I walked into the kitchen, took the chicken out, turned off the oven and walked out the door. He yells to me THANKS FOR THE COMPANY, or something like that. I didn't even respond I just kept walking. I wasn't mad that he fell asleep, per se. I was mad because I went over there for comfort and all he could think about was himself. I'm also mad because of the way he was so rude about the whole situation, like when he asked why I didn't just turn off the oven, as if he was saying I GOT WHAT I NEEDED FROM YOU SO YOU CAN GO NOW. He could care less what I was going through, it was all about him. Why it took a sink full of dirty dishes and a pan of chicken to make me realize he's a selfish jerk, I don't know. All I know is that I am done!!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
nicki Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Hi Mary, :laugh: ! (Yes, less sex, but better life!) Not That Innocent, good for you! The guy is a big time loser. Reading your post, I got the mental image of you standing in his apartment with a big look of understanding on your face. (cue mental headslap image) Stay strong. He will come after you, with sweet words and chocolate, no doubt. Just keep remembering your Epiphany in his apartment. Say it over and over to yourself like a mantra. You have clear insight about this matter. Next time he calls, say: "I was just lying on the couch watching TV. Can you come over and clean my place and cook me lasagna, homemade, of course. Then I'm going to need a massage and a nap so let yourself out when you're done..." Really, though, you sound like a thoughtful, loving woman. Whatever kind of relationship you want with someone, I hope it is with a guy who treats you in kind. Link to post Share on other sites
LaDiva Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Hi Mary, :laugh: ! (Yes, less sex, but better life!) Not That Innocent, good for you! The guy is a big time loser. Reading your post, I got the mental image of you standing in his apartment with a big look of understanding on your face. (cue mental headslap image) Stay strong. He will come after you, with sweet words and chocolate, no doubt. Just keep remembering your Epiphany in his apartment. Say it over and over to yourself like a mantra. You have clear insight about this matter. Next time he calls, say: "I was just lying on the couch watching TV. Can you come over and clean my place and cook me lasagna, homemade, of course. Then I'm going to need a massage and a nap so let yourself out when you're done..." Really, though, you sound like a thoughtful, loving woman. Whatever kind of relationship you want with someone, I hope it is with a guy who treats you in kind. Most times advice that isn't warranted isn't advice that we often take! We as individuals have to learn the lesson ourselves. Otherwise, we just won't get it, and we will continue the same vicious circle... they say that experience is the best teacher... I heartily disagree... I'd have to say that obedience is the best teacher. Because I've been through this "experience thing", time and time again. It isn't until I start listening to myself, (the inner me) the things that have been instilled in me by my parents, and the authority of my high power that I said, HEY! this is all my fault! We sometimes are our own worst enemy! We can only be there to support and lend an ear... and give words of encouragement... Can I just tell you that I LOVE this site? Link to post Share on other sites
cassis Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Wow this guy sounds really charming! Even if he is just a FWB he shouldn't be telling you to cook and clean for him and then getting mad when you wake him up and don't turn the oven off. That's just ridiculous. You're not his slave. And you're not his girlfriend. You're a friend to have sex with, with no strings attached. But from what i've read so far i get the impression that you actually want more from him than just sex. You want the emotional side of things too. A relationship. The fact that you called him crying with a problem instead of calling a true friend that doesn't use you, makes me think you would like things to be more than they actually are. You've got to ask yourself though,if he treats you like this when you're apparently just friends, than how would he treat you in a relationship and would you really want that. Also, if you just stay FWB, no strings attached, do you feel comfortable with the fact that he could be sleeping with numerous other women? I only ask this because it sounds like you have feelings for this man and he doesn't recipricate them and definately does not treat you like you should be treated. You sound like a lovely person and i wish you all the best but if i was you i would get rid of this guy and focus on someone that treats me right. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Not_That_Innocent Posted April 2, 2007 Author Share Posted April 2, 2007 Wow this guy sounds really charming! Even if he is just a FWB he shouldn't be telling you to cook and clean for him and then getting mad when you wake him up and don't turn the oven off. That's just ridiculous. You're not his slave. And you're not his girlfriend. You're a friend to have sex with, with no strings attached. But from what i've read so far i get the impression that you actually want more from him than just sex. You want the emotional side of things too. A relationship. The fact that you called him crying with a problem instead of calling a true friend that doesn't use you, makes me think you would like things to be more than they actually are. You've got to ask yourself though,if he treats you like this when you're apparently just friends, than how would he treat you in a relationship and would you really want that. Also, if you just stay FWB, no strings attached, do you feel comfortable with the fact that he could be sleeping with numerous other women? I only ask this because it sounds like you have feelings for this man and he doesn't recipricate them and definately does not treat you like you should be treated. You sound like a lovely person and i wish you all the best but if i was you i would get rid of this guy and focus on someone that treats me right. Yeah, silly me to think that the Friends part of FWB would actually exist. That is why I called him, because I needed someone to talk to, like a friend would. Believe me, I don't want to be in a relationship with him - but I really did want to be friends. I know, naive of me to think that could actually work. I know for a fact that he has other women. Whether or not he is sleeping with them, I don't know. Somehow, that never bothered me. All I ever wanted was for him to be there for me when we are together, to give his attention to me when we are together. He's a known player, so I know he has other women but he has never thrown that in my face. But he may as well have since he treats me like crap in other ways. Oh well, you live -- you learn. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Hey, thanks! After last night I have decided to go back to NC - hard core this time and I'm not going to fall for his sweet talk!! I called him last night crying and upset over something that happened. He asked if I wanted to come over, so I did. As crazy as it may souund given my previous posts, I did not go over there for sex. I just needed a friend, someone to talk to. Remember, I was upset. I walked in the door and the first thing he said to me was I want you to cook for me. It caught me off guard but I said okay. Then he asked me what happened, as far as why I was upset. I told him and his response was that he didn't know what to say. Okay - no harm in that, but that was it. Everything turned into what he wanted. We bantered back and forth about what he wanted me to cook. He got frustrated because he wanted steak, baked potato and a salad and I didn't feel like making all that. His kitchen was a mess, therefore I wasn't motivated to go through the work of such a big meal. He said forget it and decided to make just a salad. That's where he got me, because he knew that I would feel bad for frustrating him. So while he ate his salad I agreed to clean the kitchen, which I didn't really mind because the mess was driving me nuts and I felt like it would be theraputic to keep busy. What I did mind was the fact that he essentially manipulated me into wanting to do it. Right then and there I realized, hey - this guy is an expert at manipulating me. But wait - there's more! He finished up the salad and was still hungry so he said he was going to make chicken once the kitchen clean. So I'm in the kitchen and he's lying on the couch calls for me to turn on the oven and clean out the pan he wanted to use for chicken. While I was doing that, he was falling asleep so I got the chicken ready and put it in the oven. The whole time he was asleep and I didn't want to wake him so I entertained myself by watching the movie he had going. When the chicken was about done I tried to wake him up, but I did so subtly by rubbing his hands and legs. Looking back I should have just shouted HEY - WAKE UP! There I was gently trying to wake him up and he says in a very rude voice - STOP DOING THAT PLEASE! I said fine, I'm leaving -just wanted to wake you up because the oven is still on. I start to walk out the door and he asked if the chicken was done. I told him just about and he asked if I was mad and sorry for falling asleep. I said no problem, I'm leaving - just wanted to let you know the oven is still on. He says (in a very rude voice) - SO WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST TURN OFF THE OVEN. So I walked into the kitchen, took the chicken out, turned off the oven and walked out the door. He yells to me THANKS FOR THE COMPANY, or something like that. I didn't even respond I just kept walking. I wasn't mad that he fell asleep, per se. I was mad because I went over there for comfort and all he could think about was himself. I'm also mad because of the way he was so rude about the whole situation, like when he asked why I didn't just turn off the oven, as if he was saying I GOT WHAT I NEEDED FROM YOU SO YOU CAN GO NOW. He could care less what I was going through, it was all about him. Why it took a sink full of dirty dishes and a pan of chicken to make me realize he's a selfish jerk, I don't know. All I know is that I am done!!!!!!!! This letter sickened me alot. The first thing he should have done is comforted you and offered to cook you some dinner, rub your feet and just let you relax and cry it out what was bothering you. I would not have offered to cook ANYTHING for him and would have told him if you are hungry cook it yourself or just order a Pizza. Then his slobby a** kitchen was a mess and he wanted you to get yourself dirty cleaning it. I would have told him " Wow someone is a real pathetic slob and you sure need to get in there and clean it " I would have then sat down on the couch and grabbed the remote. And then after you cooked for the bastard he told you to clean the kitchen AGAIN. I would have told him to get in there and help you clean it . Then he asked you to turn back on the oven. Were his hands damaged from a fire ? Could he have walked over to the oven and turned the little dials ? Then you cooked the chicken too while the lazy azz slept on the couch. I would have woken him up and said " Hey Lazy Butt go turn your oven on and cook your own chicken because I am leaving " The guy totally does not respect you and it just getting a piece of azz at his conveinance. This NC needs to be forever. Let him go find another slave. Link to post Share on other sites
blue16 Posted April 2, 2007 Share Posted April 2, 2007 Everyone seems to be getting mad at the guy because he is using her and what not...but what about the OP who LETS him get away with this? She is letting him walk all over her, and that's why he continues to abuse the situation. Is he a great guy? No, of course not. But something has to be said for the OP continually doing what this guy says...instead of actually standing up for herself. I have no idea why you would cook dinner for him, clean his kitchen, follow his commands while he is asleep on the couch. And this during a time when you were supposed to come over so he could comfort you...LMAO. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Not_That_Innocent Posted April 3, 2007 Author Share Posted April 3, 2007 Everyone seems to be getting mad at the guy because he is using her and what not...but what about the OP who LETS him get away with this? She is letting him walk all over her, and that's why he continues to abuse the situation. Is he a great guy? No, of course not. But something has to be said for the OP continually doing what this guy says...instead of actually standing up for herself. I have no idea why you would cook dinner for him, clean his kitchen, follow his commands while he is asleep on the couch. And this during a time when you were supposed to come over so he could comfort you...LMAO. I'm sure there are times in your life where you have come across a situation in which you could have taken advantage, but stopped yourself. I can't tell you how many times I have been given too much change back at the store, but I corrected the error because I did not want the cashier's drawer to come up short. That's just the kind of person I am. Yes, I allowed him to take advantage of me, but at the time I didn't see it that way because we are supposed to be friends and I thought he would appreciate the things I was doing, not take advantage. I think that is why some of the posters think he's a jerk. Ultimately it's my fault, but he's a jerk for perpetuating the situation!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted April 3, 2007 Share Posted April 3, 2007 I'm sure there are times in your life where you have come across a situation in which you could have taken advantage, but stopped yourself. I can't tell you how many times I have been given too much change back at the store, but I corrected the error because I did not want the cashier's drawer to come up short. That's just the kind of person I am. Yes, I allowed him to take advantage of me, but at the time I didn't see it that way because we are supposed to be friends and I thought he would appreciate the things I was doing, not take advantage. I think that is why some of the posters think he's a jerk. Ultimately it's my fault, but he's a jerk for perpetuating the situation!!! The most important thing is that you realized he was being an azz wipe. There are lots of jerks out there and I myself have let a few things go but only a few ( quickly ) and then I realize what a chump and move on Link to post Share on other sites
Author Not_That_Innocent Posted April 7, 2007 Author Share Posted April 7, 2007 He called yesterday. I was at work and didn't know it was him calling, otherwise I wouldn't have answered the phone. I think he could hear in my voice that I wasn't happy with him and he asked me what was wrong. I told him I don't like the way he treats me. That I think he's rude and has no regard for my feelings. He asked if it was about the other night when he yelled at me about the oven. I said yes, I came over to your house for comfort and it turned into what you wanted and needed. He apologized, saying that he has always been mean in his sleep, that when he was little his mom was always afraid to wake him up because he's angry when he sleeps. I said yeah, well- why did everything have to be about him that night since I was the one who needed comfort. He said that he was thinking about that and that he may have been selfish and that he was so sorry. He said that he wants to take me out for a nice dinner because of all the nice things I have done for him. I explained that I didn't want him to spend $$, that it would be more beneficial to just take the time to get to know me better so that he's not always hurting my feelings. He again said that he was sorry and asked if I could help him because he doesn't really know how to be a friend. I said okay, but in all honesty I don't care anymore. I don't plan on calling him or initiating any contact with him at all. I should have told him right then and there that I don't want to be friends anymore, but he seemed sincere in what he was saying. After we got off the phone, I realized the things he was saying were all a part of his scheme to try and win me back and get me to change my mind about him. Little does he know that he would have to do a lot more than say a few I'm sorrys to change my mind. He would have to show me through his actions that he's not a selfish A -HOLE, which I don't think he is capable of doing, or even wants to do. He WANTS something from me, so he was just trying to butter me up to get it. I am so on to him!!! I was the one who ended the conversation saying I had a lot of work to do. He said okay, I will call you later. I should have said DON'T BOTHER JERK FACE, but that is a weakness of mine - it's hard for me to be flat out rude to people, even when they have done me wrong. At least now he knows how I feel as far as how rude I think he is and maybe he will simply stop calling. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 He called yesterday. I was at work and didn't know it was him calling, otherwise I wouldn't have answered the phone. I think he could hear in my voice that I wasn't happy with him and he asked me what was wrong. I told him I don't like the way he treats me. That I think he's rude and has no regard for my feelings. He asked if it was about the other night when he yelled at me about the oven. I said yes, I came over to your house for comfort and it turned into what you wanted and needed. He apologized, saying that he has always been mean in his sleep, that when he was little his mom was always afraid to wake him up because he's angry when he sleeps. I said yeah, well- why did everything have to be about him that night since I was the one who needed comfort. He said that he was thinking about that and that he may have been selfish and that he was so sorry. He said that he wants to take me out for a nice dinner because of all the nice things I have done for him. I explained that I didn't want him to spend $$, that it would be more beneficial to just take the time to get to know me better so that he's not always hurting my feelings. He again said that he was sorry and asked if I could help him because he doesn't really know how to be a friend. I said okay, but in all honesty I don't care anymore. I don't plan on calling him or initiating any contact with him at all. I should have told him right then and there that I don't want to be friends anymore, but he seemed sincere in what he was saying. After we got off the phone, I realized the things he was saying were all a part of his scheme to try and win me back and get me to change my mind about him. Little does he know that he would have to do a lot more than say a few I'm sorrys to change my mind. He would have to show me through his actions that he's not a selfish A -HOLE, which I don't think he is capable of doing, or even wants to do. He WANTS something from me, so he was just trying to butter me up to get it. I am so on to him!!! I was the one who ended the conversation saying I had a lot of work to do. He said okay, I will call you later. I should have said DON'T BOTHER JERK FACE, but that is a weakness of mine - it's hard for me to be flat out rude to people, even when they have done me wrong. At least now he knows how I feel as far as how rude I think he is and maybe he will simply stop calling. He could just be a Narcisstic social misfit. I was once going out with someone like that. It was always all about HIM. When he wanted to see me , when he wanted sex, when he wanted to go out to dinner , when he felt like calling. One day he had his pissy fit mood which changed like often and I stopped picking up the phone. He begged me to see him and confessed he had strong feelings. Too bad .....It was too late. I was tired of his BS. Now he is off being toxic with a new girl...I feel sorry for her that she will have to live under HIS rules and lifestyle. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Not_That_Innocent Posted April 7, 2007 Author Share Posted April 7, 2007 He could just be a Narcisstic social misfit. I was once going out with someone like that. It was always all about HIM. When he wanted to see me , when he wanted sex, when he wanted to go out to dinner , when he felt like calling. One day he had his pissy fit mood which changed like often and I stopped picking up the phone. He begged me to see him and confessed he had strong feelings. Too bad .....It was too late. I was tired of his BS. Now he is off being toxic with a new girl...I feel sorry for her that she will have to live under HIS rules and lifestyle. I recently read up on Narcissistic Personality Disorder and of the 50 traits they list, he has like 40 of him. I also read up on how to get rid of someone like that and the best advice I could find was to ignore them. Once he finds another "victim" he will leave me alone. Link to post Share on other sites
Mary3 Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 I recently read up on Narcissistic Personality Disorder and of the 50 traits they list, he has like 40 of him. I also read up on how to get rid of someone like that and the best advice I could find was to ignore them. Once he finds another "victim" he will leave me alone. Right on ! Link to post Share on other sites
bridget_jones Posted April 7, 2007 Share Posted April 7, 2007 Didn't see this coming at all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Not_That_Innocent Posted April 8, 2007 Author Share Posted April 8, 2007 Didn't see this coming at all. As always, Bridget - thanks for your support! Link to post Share on other sites
mental_traveller Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 For a "relationship" to be FWB, you actually have to be friends in the first place. You know - when you get on with someone, think they're a cool person to hang out with, no drama, they respect you etc. Here you have an AWB - assh*le with benefits. Link to post Share on other sites
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