Trialbyfire Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 While I can empathize with your pain, your biblical logic is flawed. You CANNOT get a double whopper at McDonalds. Link to post Share on other sites
AHIWON Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 I think your intuition is correct. Not only that but I think she prefers Italian men with large feet. Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 This is a serious thread. I have several very valid reasons why I'm suspicious which, I will list here. 1. The time it takes to drive from my home to the local McDonalds is approximately 4 minutes. The average time it takes to be served through the drive-up window is 3 minutes. This amounts to a total of 11 minutes taking into consideration the trip going and coming plus the time it takes to be served. On average it takes my wife approximately 13 minutes to come back home after a trip to Mickey Dee's. Can anyone offer a realistic explanation of this time variance? If there are milkshakes involved it could explain it.... or if you are in an area of where immigrants seem to be employed by these types of establishments........ "NO I SAID CHEEEEEESE BURGER, AND A S-M-A-L-L DRINK....... NOT FRICKING SLEEZE FRUGER" also people that often enter these types of food providing establishments are part of a dark force. I understand satanist group there and pass messages to each other in the form of hot apple pies. Short term alien abuductions have also been witnessed. Any signs of anal probing? 2. The cheeseburger is technically a sandwich which leads me to believe that she may be into the 2 on 1 thing. If this is true I will be devastated! It could be..... sounds like she is trying to super size. My next piece of evidence is very deep, symbolic and may prove beyond all doubt the existence of higher being who is guiding us through the use of written codes and miraculous signs. Let's take a moment to examine what type of cheeseburgers she actually eats. She always orders a "A double whopper cheeseburger with extra mayo, ketchup, onions and large fries". Based on this startling fact and a program about the bible code shown on the history channel I decided to attempt and decipher the text above to see if I could find a code interwoven into the sentence describing what she eats. Prepare yourself, the results are SHOCKING! I was able to dissect several key words and phrases in this text which PROVE beyond all shadow of a doubt that GOD is speaking to me through the use of codes and warning me of her deceitful behavior See below A double whopper cheeseburger with extra mayo, ketchup, onions and large fries She is sleeping with another man She is cheating on you infidelity she slept with him All of these words can be derived from the sentence above. I am 100% confident this is NO coincidence! are you finding the wrappers in her luggage or in the trash can hidden under tissue? Link to post Share on other sites
AHIWON Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 While I can empathize with your pain, your biblical logic is flawed. You CANNOT get a double whopper at McDonalds. Thats the "fog talk" as this woman is so tied up with the two restaurants and this bizarre love triangle, there is sure to be some confusion. Link to post Share on other sites
Author chaos40 Posted April 5, 2007 Author Share Posted April 5, 2007 THis further PROVES the deceitfulness! That lying, rotten, whore! wait till I get home...she's gonna have some explaining to do now!! thanks so much for this additional insight BTW, do you think she was attracted to the POWER of the KiNG rather than the "Red Shoes" on the Ronald Mcdonald guy? thanks Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 Thats the "fog talk" as this woman is so tied up with the two restaurants and this bizarre love triangle, there is sure to be some confusion. Yes, the "fog talk". Considering the players involved, it could become confusing due to the lack of anything resembling a healthy diet on either menu. You are what you eat. Link to post Share on other sites
AHIWON Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 Perhaps a distraction from the burgers is in order. If you have seen Supersize Me then this may be a therapeutic alternative for her to try: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBrshcS3SXs Link to post Share on other sites
mental_traveller Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 Lately, my wife has been eating a lot of cheeseburgers. This new behavior has led me to believe she may be having an affair. Have any of you noticed a correlation between eating cheeseburgers and an unfaithful partner? thanks in advance Who cares if she is having an affair? Just eating lots cheeseburgers is sufficient grounds for divorce. I hate people who let themselves go after marriage. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 Who cares if she is having an affair? Just eating lots cheeseburgers is sufficient grounds for divorce. I hate people who let themselves go after marriage. I'll have to side with chaos40, an affair in general hurts everyone involved. He needs to have a d-day with her and bring the issue to light..or heavy, in this case. Otherwise, simply divorcing her will only bring pain and hatred. Communication is key but he also has to get his burgers in order before he does this. A legal battle with only ketchup stains and a few wrappers won't hold. Link to post Share on other sites
Author chaos40 Posted April 5, 2007 Author Share Posted April 5, 2007 Surprisingly, she has not gained any weight, even though she is regularly consuming large quantities of cheeseburgers. I suspect this may be due to the high caloric expenditures experienced during her sexual encounters with Ronald Mcdonald and Burger King. Damn whore! Link to post Share on other sites
Author chaos40 Posted April 5, 2007 Author Share Posted April 5, 2007 I'll have to side with chaos40, an affair in general hurts everyone involved. He needs to have a d-day with her and bring the issue to light..or heavy, in this case. Otherwise, simply divorcing her will only bring pain and hatred. Communication is key but he also has to get his burgers in order before he does this. A legal battle with only ketchup stains and a few wrappers won't hold. will she seek custody of everything on the kids meal menu? Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 will she seek custody of everything on the kids meal menu? If I were to guess, it would be the McNuggets only. A gut feeling. You know her and yourself best. If she gets custody of all the toys in the Happy Meals, how will that make you feel? Link to post Share on other sites
Author chaos40 Posted April 5, 2007 Author Share Posted April 5, 2007 If I were to guess, it would be the McNuggets only. A gut feeling. You know her and yourself best. If she gets custody of all the toys in the Happy Meals, how will that make you feel? Awful, I've grown quite attached to the nuggets and jr. cheeseburgers. I will try to make arrangements for joint custody. question: Do I get an attorney or do I allow the Colonel Sanders mediate the situation Link to post Share on other sites
Sup Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 Awful, I've grown quite attached to the nuggets and jr. cheeseburgers. I will try to make arrangements for joint custody. question: Do I get an attorney or do I allow the Colonel Sanders mediate the situation I would get the Nuggets and Jr. cheeseburgers validated, just to be sure they ARE yours, I would protect any and ALL cashdrawers that you have, including any packages of cookies that you may have invested in milk. After all of this why would you want her back? I mean, she's probably filled with Trans-Fats by now! EWWWW! Link to post Share on other sites
Author chaos40 Posted April 5, 2007 Author Share Posted April 5, 2007 I would get the Nuggets and Jr. cheeseburgers validated, just to be sure they ARE yours, I would protect any and ALL cashdrawers that you have, including any packages of cookies that you may have invested in milk. After all of this why would you want her back? I mean, she's probably filled with Trans-Fats by now! EWWWW! good advice... I would hardly want to end up supporting a dollar menu meal that isn't mine...with today's court system you just don't know though. She is not aware of the fact that I'm on to her so I don't think she has supersized her order yet. This is, of course, just a guess on my part. so, the consensus seem to be that my suspicions and evidence to support this is indeed well founded and I have a very legitimate case here. Do you think the judge will see my point of view and grant a divorce on the grounds of adultery based on my circumstantial evidence? Link to post Share on other sites
AHIWON Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 I'd persue a tribunal in front of the Colonel. That's your best bet. You know how he hates these burger types. Pretty sure you will come out on top. Get that transfat whore out of your life, you can do better than that. Perhaps someone who chooses from the healthy menu. Link to post Share on other sites
Author chaos40 Posted April 5, 2007 Author Share Posted April 5, 2007 I think I'll bring Taco bell into the loop as well. THis way, when she loses, that annoying little dog can chase the cunt away! Link to post Share on other sites
Mustang Sally Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 Don't forget to install a keylogger on her car's GPS...You may need concrete evidence. Oh, and save any receipts you find in the glove box... Link to post Share on other sites
Author chaos40 Posted April 5, 2007 Author Share Posted April 5, 2007 Don't forget to install a keylogger on her car's GPS...You may need concrete evidence. Oh, and save any receipts you find in the glove box... Does this mean that you DON'T think my code within the cheeseburger sentence is concrete enough? I thought that was pretty powerful and compelling evidence to support my claim Link to post Share on other sites
Snkpack Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 Never trust a woman who always has to have meat in her mouth. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 I'd persue a tribunal in front of the Colonel. That's your best bet. You know how he hates these burger types. Pretty sure you will come out on top. Get that transfat whore out of your life, you can do better than that. Perhaps someone who chooses from the healthy menu. I would go with the legal advice......not the Colonel's. Why do you ask? Because he is DEAD!!!!!! I think I would derive 11 original pieces of concrete evidence and take them to an attorney. If you can prove your case, biblical or not, then you my friend will take that rotten whore for everything she has and be living the good life in your new found White Castle! Link to post Share on other sites
jadedhalo Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 I'd persue a tribunal in front of the Colonel. That's your best bet. You know how he hates these burger types. Pretty sure you will come out on top. Get that transfat whore out of your life, you can do better than that. Perhaps someone who chooses from the healthy menu. I would go with the legal advice......not the Colonel's. Why do you ask? Because he is DEAD!!!!!! I think I would derive 11 original pieces of concrete evidence and take them to an attorney. If you can prove your case, biblical or not, then you my friend will take that rotten whore for everything she has and be living the good life in your new found White Castle! Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 I would go with the legal advice......not the Colonel's. Why do you ask? Because he is DEAD!!!!!! I think I would derive 11 original pieces of concrete evidence and take them to an attorney. If you can prove your case, biblical or not, then you my friend will take that rotten whore for everything she has and be living the good life in your new found White Castle! This is good advice. If she's had angioplasty surgery before, consider it one of the 11. Link to post Share on other sites
jadedhalo Posted April 5, 2007 Share Posted April 5, 2007 This is good advice. If she's had angioplasty surgery before, consider it one of the 11. Lettuce not forget haliotosis as well to add to the 11. I think with all of those onions, even the King or the Clown would wilt. Link to post Share on other sites
Author chaos40 Posted April 5, 2007 Author Share Posted April 5, 2007 I'm gonna stick that whore for every french fry, onion ring and cheeseburger she has!!!!! You guys are so supportive during this dark time in my life Link to post Share on other sites
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