AngelDaddy_LA Posted April 10, 2007 Share Posted April 10, 2007 My g/f of over 3 years will not stop calling a guy she gave oral sex to about 6 months ago. She says to trust her she/he are not doing anything bad but talking. It upsets me that she continues to talk to him and i have expressed my reason, yet she states she has the right to choose her friends and nobody can tell her who she be friends with or not. Now I'll admit she is right, but what makes this a concern is that she calls him over 100 times per month. He's the firast call in the morning, and they each other all day long. She says she loves me and knows this is upsetting to me yet will not stop calling him. What Gives? Link to post Share on other sites
Bree Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 You should end it with her. She may say she loves you but she is definetly not showing you love. Talking to someone everyday that she blew thats just wrong she clearly doesnt even respect your feelings. Link to post Share on other sites
Enema Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 Very disrespectful. I think at this point the question of if she's telling the truth about nothing going on is moot. Even if nothing's going on, the behaviour is still inappropriate and you deserve better. Link to post Share on other sites
LakesideDream Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 It's a big world, with to many prospective relationships hiding in it to continue wasting effort on this one. You say that she's your girlfriend, and has been for three years, yet she felt to compelled to suck another mans penis six months ago? Be rational, you are the "good for now" guy. She's out there shopping and test driving. Link to post Share on other sites
Emotional24 Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 first of all...she's already chosen him over you. 2nd...although you can't make her choose who her friends are you can choose for yourself if she's someone you'll want to stay with. Its all up to you and what you want to put up with. She's clearly not going to stop having him in her life to the extreme that he is. And regardless if she ever does stop contacting him as much...you're never going to be able to completely trust her and what she's really doing. Is that the kind of relationship you want to put yourself through??? It'll take a lot of work to get to that point if so. But since you've been together for 3 years and she cheated on you with this guy 6 months ago and is saying he is now "just a friend" and says she can choose who her friends are and is talking to him 24/7 then he is not "just a friend." Something isn't right with that picture. I'd get rid of her asap...easier said than done but no one deserves to be disrespected like this...now the question is how much do you respect yourself??? Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted April 11, 2007 Share Posted April 11, 2007 What gives? She's a cheater, a liar, selfish, self-centered, and has no respect for you or your feelings or your relationship. Dump her now regardless of how much you care for her because she will be nothing but heartbreak for you. She's already decided to put herself first, this other guy second, and you dead last. Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted April 12, 2007 Share Posted April 12, 2007 Are you out of your mind? If the roles were reversed do you think she would accept such crap from you? She is making you look like a total fool and you are continuing to accept such utter disrespect and humiliation from her. She clearly has no respect for you. It is sad that you seemingly have so little respect for yourself as well. Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted April 13, 2007 Share Posted April 13, 2007 My g/f of over 3 years will not stop calling a guy she gave oral sex to about 6 months ago. She says to trust her she/he are not doing anything bad but talking. It upsets me that she continues to talk to him and i have expressed my reason, yet she states she has the right to choose her friends and nobody can tell her who she be friends with or not. Now I'll admit she is right, but what makes this a concern is that she calls him over 100 times per month. He's the firast call in the morning, and they each other all day long. She says she loves me and knows this is upsetting to me yet will not stop calling him. What Gives? are you f*cking kidding me? You don't think anything is wrong with the bolded part? nothing at all? Now lets all goto the land of butterscotch rivers and chocolate waterfalls where that first statement of your post doesn't draw up a huge red flag She gave you the typical "bla bla you can't tell me who to be friends with" line? Talk about cliche, ok, it's like this: She is right, she can hang out/ talk to whoever she wants. However, the whole part about nobody can tell her who she can be friends with? Complete BS. Me, you, a homeless guy, anyone can tell this chick who she can and can't hang out with, the point is about whom she listens to. Your situation is already screwy because your gf seems to like giving oral to guys she isnt dating, but I'm talking about generally, people who say "oh my bf cant make me do this" or "oh my gf cant tell me not to do that" are completely kidding themselves. If I have a gf, I damn well have every right to tell her not to be hanging around alone with some dude, especially someone she gave oral to. If she put up a big fuss over it, she'd be dumped, plain and simple. Ladies: if you respect the guy you're dating, don't hang around with guys you've fooled around with. *beginning rant* People need to stop pretending there isn't an unwritten law when it comes to dating: if you're a girl with a bf, you dont hang around other guys alone. That is, there should never be a situation where you and another guy are hanging out somewhere without anybody else around, I dont care if you need to study for a test, goto a library and find another study buddy, do something. Now, if its you and a few female friends plus some guys, fine. Same with guys, you dont hang out with chicks alone if you have a gf. I dont care if you got some dawsons creek stuff going on where you've been friends since you were in diapers, you just don't do it..you wanna be alone with this person so bad? then date them, otherwise use common sense. Next: Ex's are out. Bottom line. They are an ex for a reason, so STFU about your little "oh we're just friends" and "oh we're just keeping in touch" no, none of that needs to happen. People you've been sexual with? Stay the hell away from them, you don't need to be around them, period. Heres a tip: dont fool around with good friends, cuz then they gotta go bye bye once you begin to date someone else, and dont you dare b*tch about it when your s/o asks you to stop hanging around a good friend you f*cked, nobody told you to mess around with a good friend, now you gotta accept the consequences. People really need to rid themselves of the notion they can have their cake and eat it too, because when they don't people get hurt. *ends rant* Link to post Share on other sites
reservoirdog1 Posted April 13, 2007 Share Posted April 13, 2007 My g/f of over 3 years will not stop calling a guy she gave oral sex to about 6 months ago. She says to trust her she/he are not doing anything bad but talking. It upsets me that she continues to talk to him and i have expressed my reason, yet she states she has the right to choose her friends and nobody can tell her who she be friends with or not. Now I'll admit she is right, but what makes this a concern is that she calls him over 100 times per month. He's the firast call in the morning, and they each other all day long. She says she loves me and knows this is upsetting to me yet will not stop calling him. What Gives? "What gives" is that she has no respect for you or your relationship. DUMP HER CHEATING ASS NOW. No shyt it upsets you! I can't believe this has been allowed to continue this long. Going no contact with somebody she cheated with is an absolute no-brainer. All you need(ed) to say was, "you're right, I don't get to choose who you can be friends with. But I do get to choose who I'm friends with. Get the picture?" If she wasn't willing to go no contact six months ago out of a little smidgen of respect for you, then she's got even less now. Besides which, sorry to say, I'd bet a pound to a pinch of shyt that she's still blowing him periodically, if not more. She's a whore. Get rid of her. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 13, 2007 Share Posted April 13, 2007 Yup, I fully agree with the rest of the advice provided. She's continuing her emotional affair with him and could possibly be continuing her physical affair. Talk about a complete lack of respect for one of the key foundations to a relationship. Walk...no...run away, before she hurts you worse. Link to post Share on other sites
squeak Posted April 13, 2007 Share Posted April 13, 2007 I call BS on this post, it is too unbelievable. She is calling him "hundreds of times a month"....."the 1st call she makes in the morning" to a guy she was with --and you are writing about what to do? If this is real, you have serious boundary issues, and I wouldn't call her your GF, she is in a relationship with someone else in addition to you. Nothing exists for you to dump her, just walk away now. I think this poster needs attention, this can't be real. It smells of troll. Link to post Share on other sites
chaos40 Posted April 13, 2007 Share Posted April 13, 2007 My g/f of over 3 years will not stop calling a guy she gave oral sex to about 6 months ago. She says to trust her she/he are not doing anything bad but talking. It upsets me that she continues to talk to him and i have expressed my reason, yet she states she has the right to choose her friends and nobody can tell her who she be friends with or not. Now I'll admit she is right, but what makes this a concern is that she calls him over 100 times per month. He's the firast call in the morning, and they each other all day long. She says she loves me and knows this is upsetting to me yet will not stop calling him. What Gives? ummm ... if this one isn't obvious I don't know what to tell you. Perhaps your definition of friends and her's are two VERY different things. Maybe her definition of a friend is "a guy I suck off regularly" ..catch my drift? Sometimes people aren't lying when they say something... thier just not giving away all the details Link to post Share on other sites
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