strangeway Posted April 12, 2007 Share Posted April 12, 2007 I am freaking out...I think I might actually be falling for him, when that is the last thing I wanted to do...He has wanted me to be with him for a year, confessed his love to me, the whole thing...For the most part, I have kept my feelings completely stuffed way down, but now...now..its like I am falling for him... I DONT WANT TO DO THIS!!! I dont want to fall in love! Its not good for me....what should I do?? I hate feeling like this, and what is worse, is that I can see it coming, but there are no instruction manuals for how to NOT fall in love...I have searched...though there is PLENTY for falling IN LOVE... I need help ASAP! Link to post Share on other sites
Michelle Voyvodich Posted April 12, 2007 Share Posted April 12, 2007 I mean no disrespect by my bluntness, but I am going to be blunt in this response. stop trying...stop trying to not fall in love, or for others to fall in love...just let life be as it is, open your arms, accept and love those around you. if someone adds something positive to your life, then it's someone you should hang out with. likewise, if someone takes, then don't invest in them. in either scenario, be the person who adds something positive to someone else's life. choose to share time with your lover and grow as individuals and a unit. do not seek for them to complete you, it implies that you're not good enough the way you are; and, you are good enough the way you are. You are complete on your own, even with all the crazies and insecurities. embrace goodness in any shape or form. do not detach or seperate yourself from others out of fear or in effort to maintain a pure state. participate in life i'm not sure if that helped you, but it helps me, so i thought i'd share Link to post Share on other sites
fassaction Posted April 12, 2007 Share Posted April 12, 2007 I am freaking out...I think I might actually be falling for him, when that is the last thing I wanted to do...He has wanted me to be with him for a year, confessed his love to me, the whole thing...For the most part, I have kept my feelings completely stuffed way down, but now...now..its like I am falling for him... I DONT WANT TO DO THIS!!! I dont want to fall in love! Its not good for me....what should I do?? I hate feeling like this, and what is worse, is that I can see it coming, but there are no instruction manuals for how to NOT fall in love...I have searched...though there is PLENTY for falling IN LOVE... I need help ASAP! first and foremost...why is it not "goodfor you" to fall in love? If you like him...and he likes you, whats the big deal? Link to post Share on other sites
Author strangeway Posted April 12, 2007 Author Share Posted April 12, 2007 first and foremost...why is it not "goodfor you" to fall in love? Because, on some people, love suits them perfectly....on me, it changes me into a wreck. I'd just as soon as avoid the whole damn thing...I dont want to get caught up in it all. I would rather exist in limbo than deal with all of this right now.. Link to post Share on other sites
fassaction Posted April 12, 2007 Share Posted April 12, 2007 Because, on some people, love suits them perfectly....on me, it changes me into a wreck. I'd just as soon as avoid the whole damn thing...I dont want to get caught up in it all. I would rather exist in limbo than deal with all of this right now.. have you ever thought that maybe this person might be the person who could ballance out the "limbo"? I just recently became single....and even though im not LOOKING for any particular person, or searching for the one, i wouldnt go purposely out of my way to remove myself from the situation. Ya never know what could happen. i think you should at least give it a chance, you dont have to GET MARRIED!! just ease into it Link to post Share on other sites
Author strangeway Posted April 12, 2007 Author Share Posted April 12, 2007 i think you should at least give it a chance, you dont have to GET MARRIED!! just ease into it There is no way that I am easing into anything...forget that...You dont understand, with this, with him...it WILL be marriage...he is that serious...Easing into anything requires him to become more connected to me than he already is, and its making me sweat enough as it is. I truly am so very attracted to him, in all ways, manner and levels, but I just cant do this...I really cant....(I wrote more about this in the General Relationship section, as I wasnt sure which section it belonged in) I am sure you understand. What would repulse him? What would make a man who is in love back off? Link to post Share on other sites
Author strangeway Posted April 12, 2007 Author Share Posted April 12, 2007 Basically, all I am looking for, is a way to get out of this before it all gets out of hand. Just give me a couple of tips to make him not be in love with me anymore, or some tips on how I can stop my own emotions for him completely before I get sucked into this whole love thing. This whole mess sort of snuck up on me when I wasnt looking...It sounds stupid but its true... And he wasnt making it any easier, with his tactics that just ended up with me at the beginning of falling for him right now... I mean, there was those times that he told me that us hanging out more often will make him feel less for me, because then he would get bored and tired of seeing me so often....but it seriously didnt, and I believed him and hung out with him like crazy even though I am practically a recluse. It sounded reasonable at the time, but all that ended up happening was he was more in love with me than ever, and now I am at this point were I might be feeling the same thing too!!! Why did I listen to him?? If I would have just stuck to myself like I always have, things would have been fine right now. Uggg....why couldnt he just leave well enough alone??!! There are a million other chicks in the world, why me?? I was seriously going along at a pretty even clip until this madness started up.. This is not looking good for me at all... What should I do? Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted April 13, 2007 Share Posted April 13, 2007 maybe u should get some counseling to explore why you don't want to get in touch with your feelings. perhaps, what you new as "love" before, the experiences that make you feel freaked out, are not the definition of love. or maybe it's the relationship role models that have skewed your view. forget that distortion and learn to redifine love according to your needs and wants; hopes and dreams. in all honesty though, it doesn't sound like it's about you getting rid of him...the problem is you don't want to face yourself. when it's all said and done. if he really loves you, then he will respect the boundaries you establish. if you don't want to get married, then perhaps there's another option...maybe you could be life partners. if he doesn't respect your boundaries, then maybe that's the real issue. it just seems like your feelings are so contradictory. how can someone be just right, but all wrong for you. ur hiding something...you don't need to tell me. but you need to find the true person you love and allow them to join you in that space when and if you feel comfortable. if you can't do that, then they are not "the one" note: if you can't receive love, then you can't give it either. human's need love to survive. Link to post Share on other sites
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