Do or Don't? => Dating a co-worker

[2Nice]

I have been working at my current job for four months. During these four months a co-worker has expressed interest in dating me. From what I know about him, he seems to be a really good guy and he's attractive. I wouldn't mind trying to see where things could go between us. However, at this time, I kind of feel like it may be unwise to date someone I work with. I would like to see what others think about this. Any offers of advice or opinions would be appreciated. Thanks.

[mighty bop]

I say go for it. Just be careful. I recently started dating someone from work and things are going great. If you do decide to go out with them, make sure you don't smother them at work or things will get old real fast. Also, don't make it too obvious that you guys are dating.

[Paulie]

I realize this might not be the answer that you were looking for, but only you can decide if this would be a prudent thing for you to be doing. I would absolutely NOT rule out dating this guy just because he works with you. This should not be an absolute thing, although it is wise of you to take this into consideration.

 

Do you like the guy? Do you see the possibility of the two of you being able to keep work seperate from your personal relationship? Could the two of you be mature in the event of a breakup? These are all things that you should take into consideration. I think it would be terrible, however, for you to pass up what could be a wonderful relationship simply because of "rules" (that you "dont date someone that you work with")

 

I wish you the best of luck

 

Paulie

[clia]

You must consider the long term ramifications of this before you decide.

 

Do you work in the same department? Do you attend meetings with him daily? Do you work closely with him?

 

Do you plan to tell anyone at work? Does your company allow co-workers to date?

 

If things go well, you don't have too much to worry about. It's more if things don't end up panning out that you might have to worry, especially if he's the one who ends things with you. You have to consider all of the scenarios, and if they occur, will you still be able to work with him and see him on a daily basis? We all know how bad breakups can be, and that the best way to get over them is to not have to see that person. Being that this is a co-worker, you will have to see him. No way around that.

 

What if you go out a few times and he never calls you again? What if he pursues heartily for a month or two and then backs off? Can you separate the personal from the professional? What if you date for six months and he breaks up with you? What if you find out later that he's a complete jerk? Etc...

 

Remember, you have to see him every day!

 

I'm not trying to inject a negative vibe into anything, but I think these are important things to consider. I'm going through a similar decision myself at the moment.

[Debster]

At first it's quite exciting - especially if you keep it hush hush - but in the end when it ended, it was very awkward at work.

 

Weigh the pros and cons and decide for yourself. If you don't know how you feel about him, I'd pass on it.

[2Nice]

Thanks to all who have responded to my post.

 

Yes, this is quite a decision for me. I really like this guy. However, I need to contemplate how it will effect the dynamic at work.

 

Fortunately, he's not someone I work closely with. I usually see him everyday though. We work for a small organization and rumors and gossip spread like wildfire. Which is why I hesitate on dating him. I am the type of person who prefers to have my personal life separate from my professional life. Yet, I don't want to miss out on a good guy.

 

Perhaps, the best thing to do right now is to work on our friendship and see where it goes from there.

 

If there are any more words of wisdom or opinions, I am open to hearing them.

 

Thanks.