UPDATE: I hate myspace. I hate my weakness!!

[EricOnTheWeb]

I pray for strength that this is it.

 

I want this to be it. I need to move on. He already has. I need to leave strong. I dont want the ending to be HIM leaving me AGAIN.

 

I need to be the strong person I am again. He's broken me like no one else has ever.

 

Everyone who isn't doing NC. Please learn from my mistakes.

 

 

Yes you WIll show him how much he has lost....and guess what?.....from what I read on what he is like.....you haven't lost a hell of alot:)

 

It's his loss and nothing but HIS loss.....You're strong now....stay away from Myspace ....and make him kiss your ass;)

[2ndIINone]

Things in life either make you or break you. this is breaking me.

 

it only breaks you short term..... but it'll make you long term.

 

God wouldn't give you something if he didn't think you could handle it.

[AriaIncognito]

I let go of mine via a text message 11 days ago. You can and should do the same....

[surfnbro74]

icantletgo im so sorry to hear the friendship thing didnt work out for you. the "lets be friend thing" usually never works out if you still have deep feelings for him. i know cuz i was in the same situation with my ex-wife. she wanted to be friends w/me too after the seperation, so i tried to that but in the long run it didnt work out cuz she was seeing someone else. so everytime i dont hear or see her i know she is with him which makes me hurt even more and after so many months like this i just gave up the friendship thing. i told her i dont want to be friends anymore and went to nc. im doing so much better now and feeling free again..some days i miss her but im healing faster by doing nc. im in better shape now also, since i joined the gym, been hitting it pretty hard and losing a lot of weight and gaining a lot of muscles. also, my social life is much better and meeting a lot of new people out there which is fun. so, you too can do the same cuz im a living proof of this. by the way, you are from texas..which part of texas? im also from texas, houston...we should go have a beer..lol. anyways, stay away from the "lets be friend " you are not

fully heal yet and it wont work out for you im sorry to say. go out w/ur friends and socialize and meet new people thats the best way to move on.

 

you will move on and be happy again...i promise

 

surfer

[neeser68]

In the big picture of things does it really matter if you get the upper hand? Does it matter if you end up with the power?

Honestly it doesn't mean diddly. It only means something to you and your ego. He hurt you and you want to hurt him back.

I say let all that crap go. All this energy that you are putting into all of this negativity is holding you back. You need to turn it around and start the healing process.

Control is a false sense of security. We really have no control over anything. Learn that and it will set you free!

You do have control over what you do and how you act. I hate to see someone waste their precious time on this earth over someone who isn't even worthy of your affections.

Surround yourself with positive things and keep yourself busy. Don't dwell on the sadness that you are feeling. You have so much more important things ahead of you.

You are destined for greatness!

[LakesideDream]

1st. When a person proclaims that they "cannot" to something.. they have already lost that battle.

 

2nd. You call him a man, and surely think of yourself as a woman, yet you are both acting like middle schoolers. Texting and Myspace. That's juvinile. He cheated on you, you cut him loose, end of his chapter in your life. What he does from now on shouldn't concern you. What you do obviously doesen't concern him.

 

If you want to be "the winner" go play tennis. Real people survive breakups, learn from them, and move ahead with their lives. Time for you to gain some maturity.

[Icantletgo]

Thanks everyone for their advice. You are all right.

 

Instead of laying around my house and crying and crying I have to accept the fact that while I'm crying he's probably out having a greatttt time.

 

I need to suck it up and when he calls, I have to show that I'm better than this situation.

 

He put his profile on private today (THANK GOD!) so I can't really check it and that'll be the best for me in the end.

 

NC is going to be hard. I didn't talk to him last night after all the texts. I couldn't sleep and my heart hurts...but i think about if I had initiated NC months ago, I would be fine and dandy now...

 

I still love him so much but I know it's for the best. I can finally start the rest of my life now. I can finally heal and see that the possibilities are endless.

 

I live in TX but not near Houston. Maybe next time??

[gmoise]

I completely understand where you are coming from. i was in this same state of mind when my ex of 5 years cheated on me last november. I knew he was a jerk, a lying, cheating bastard but for some reason I still needed his validation, I wanted him to regret leaving me, I wanted him to define my worth. Big mistake, I whined,and nagged and really made myself look pethatic. The lesson I learned, is that eventually he will realize that the grass is not greener on the other side. When you ask- I can't answer that, but the beautiful thing that I have realized is that once I picked myself back up, really started seeing what a beautiful, confident and intelligent woman I am, it didn't matter. Who gives a f***. He will remember the good times only when things start to go downhill in his new relationship. My ex hasn't come back but word on the street is that things aren't so hot with the girl he left me for. The honeymoon period is started to fade and he may realize he made a mistake, but the point is, it doesn't matter. Once you regain your self worth, you'll find that you don't want him back and that in itself will bring you better guys or the ex will come sniffing back out of curiousity. Hope this helps. Trust me, the less you want them, the more they want you.....

[Icantletgo]

gmoise:

how long did it take for you to feel this way???

 

did you initiate NC???

 

The thing is...things w/ his new girl aren't working out but he's holding out hope for her since he loves her!!! his new girl left him for her ex then cheated on her ex with some other guy!!!!

 

Thats' what he gets for dating 19 year olds!

[utwonderwoman]

Gmoise is right. As soon as I quit crying and calling my ex, picked myself up and regained my life back, within three months he was knocking back at my door wanting me back. But during those three months, whenever I thought about him, I only remembered all of the negative things he said and did to me. So when he finally came sauntering back into my life, I kicked him to the curb. I let him know that I was better off without him. I had started to see a wonderful man that thought I was his everything. And whom I eventually married. He has since sent me a couple of emails saying - let's be friends and stay in touch. I got to kick him to the curb AGAIN - no thanks, not interested. There is a saying that is soooo true - Living well is the best revenge.

 

BTW - all of my friends told me that as soon as I moved on and got happy, he would come crawling back. Men have seem to have a sixth sense about this thing.

 

You are going to be great, you just need to get your control back from this jerk and move on with your life. It isn't easy, but it is definitely doable. Hang in there!!!

[Icantletgo]

Wow. you are right. Everytime I let him break NC int he past..I was only making myself weaker and his hold on me stronger.

 

If i dont follow through w/ nc this time. he'll never see me as what i am: a strong, assertive, powerful woman. i've been weak for sooo long. I need to wake up and see my potential.

 

your story utwonderwoman is AMAZING.

 

It happened to me with ANOTHER ex. Broke up with me so he can go out with someone younger (all my exes always do that!) and i went nc with him for a month. he calls me crying saying he wants me back and I tell him I can't. I did it once and I can do it again!