Simling faces someimes tell lies...

[l-o-s-t]

Just thought I'd post this here in case someone, somewhere can learn from my mistakes:

 

Long story short: For the past several months, I'd had a "heavy" crush on a particular girl. I'd posted on here a time or two for advice during that period, as well as having read articles here and there to try and learn about gauging interest, etc. Time and time again, I'd read about eye contact and what it could mean - you know, prolonged eye contact, frequently looking your way, etc. All supposed to be signs of interest, right? Well, I was getting those signs often enough to make me think something was up, but it wasn't enough for shy ol' me. I wanted more, and I got it eventually. One day, I walked by her, caught her eye as always, and to my great surprise, she smiled at me. I figured it must just be a freak accident, but then it happened again. Ok, now I had something to go on: the next time I passed her I did my best to smile at her, and she shot back the most lovely, sincere smile I've seen in a long, long time. Now I had to act. I finally made contact, introduced myself, so on and so fourth. Things led to things, and it turned out she never had any interest in me, and didn't even really know who I was. She had simply smiled because I looked at her.

 

I'm sure most of you aren't stupid like me and already know this, but here it is anyway: Take things for face value, and nothing more. Don't try and over-read trivial situations, no matter what someone said it might mean. And above all, don't fall for a pretty smile, because it could mean nothing at all.

 

And with that, I leave you Loveshack: Thank-you to all who may have helped me at some point in the past - it's been insightful. I hope my leavings may in turn help some other troubled soul like myself in the future.

[Tony T]

Nobody, no sane person in the universe can have interest in you simply by smiling at you. That's simply your cue to smile back, say hello and keep moving. Then, the next time you see that person you smile again, get that introduce yourself, let them know you're glad to meet them and keep right on going. The third time you see them, under the right circumstances...and you can make those happen....you get into a conversation with them. Relationships evolve over time, they don't just get instituted with a smile. Whoever told you that?

 

I'd say a lady who smiles at you is one step over many of them who just look the other way. Now, if you walk over to a lady and say "Hey, Babe, I notice you smiled at me...does that mean you're interested in me...DUH, DUH, DUH??? This lady is going to tell you to kiss off. She will be embarrassed beyond imagination and pissed to boot.

 

Take things slow. If you find a lady who smiles at you, enjoy it. Don't take it as a sign of interest and don't take it as a sign of disinterest. The ONLY way a woman is going to be truly interested in you is to have a bit of conversation with you and learn about you. Even then, as she gets to know you she may become totally disinterested....or she may fall madly in love with you.

 

With your attitude, you may easily pass up Ms. Right a dozen times. You're asking for things to happen way, way, way too fast. GEEZE, where did you learn this stuff from anyway???

[l-o-s-t]

I don't know about the rest of you, but I wouldn't smile at a stranger of the opposite sex unless I found them quite interesting indeed, and that's how I took it. There's gota be a spark that lights the fire somewhere, and how the f*ck should I know what that is? Do you think I'd be on here if I knew? OBVIOUSLY I was wrong, OBVIOUSLY I'm a stupid n00b, or else I wouldn't have posted this as a mistake to learn from. I know what I did wrong. I'm not asking to be flamed for being an idiot. I'm simply posting MY mistakes for others who DON'T already know this to learn from, and I can see there's a guy about 3 threads below this asking about SMILES so don't tell me I'm the ONLY one who doesn't know this sh*t. Not everyone on here has mastered the game. Some of us have barely played yet.

 

Jez.

[polywog]

It's true, what Tony T said. I know you are shy, but not to worry. Maybe the girl you like who smiled at you is incredibly boring! Or annoying!

 

Finding true love is a learning process nowadays. Learn to know yourself and jump into the fray, with eyes wide open. Figure out what you desire in a mate. Then jump into the game, with compassion toward your erstwhile love-mates who are probably doing the same, and muddle through as kindly and concientiously as you can, and figure love out. Maybe it will happen sooner than later, but at least you have LS to help you muddle through!

 

Many of us here have been shy, and we are here to encourage you.

[monkey00]

Women are naturally friendly and flirts. Especially in the workplace, you'll run into single, married, and taken women who greet, make EC, and even smile...does that mean they all want you? no. For the majority of time at work it is a no.

 

The situation may change depending where you are and who you're with. There are many fine women who are interested in a guy, yet too shy to even make ec and smile. But regardless, the best thing to do is make small talk and see where it goes from there...and from there gauge interest level.