Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[benB]

I don't get why you haven't contacted me, this fight was completely your fault and yet I am the one thinking about you. You don't give a **** about me and that is clear. I need to move on just like you have in a matter of days. You are just heartless.

[visualbasicide]

I don't get why you haven't contacted me, this fight was completely your fault and yet I am the one thinking about you. You don't give a **** about me and that is clear. I need to move on just like you have in a matter of days. You are just heartless.

 

Ben, no one in a relationship gets over anyone in "a matter of days" unless it was very short lived. The ones that acted like that checked out a while back and only recently had the spine to leave.

 

Don't think for a second that there is some magical off switch for any of us. This line of reasoning will only make you feel frustrated because you will wonder why you can't "move on just like they have".

 

Take your time with it and don't blame yourself for anything that you feel, it is all real and all of it is valid. Accept whatever you are feeling and move forward with it instead of fighting it. It'll do you a lot more service in the long run. Best of luck.

[Lis007]

I loved having you over for lunch yesterday. I loved the hug you gave me when you arrived and when you left. I feel like i am floating on air but I know you only came for the kids....

 

Please give us a second chance, I love you and miss you xxxxxxxxxxx

[benB]

Ben, no one in a relationship gets over anyone in "a matter of days" unless it was very short lived. The ones that acted like that checked out a while back and only recently had the spine to leave.

 

Don't think for a second that there is some magical off switch for any of us. This line of reasoning will only make you feel frustrated because you will wonder why you can't "move on just like they have".

 

Take your time with it and don't blame yourself for anything that you feel, it is all real and all of it is valid. Accept whatever you are feeling and move forward with it instead of fighting it. It'll do you a lot more service in the long run. Best of luck.

 

Yeah sadly I know, we dated for five years or so, but she's broken up with me like three times before. So I should of seen this coming. I just need to forget about her for good this time because its becoming a habit for her to just ignore me for days or weeks then suddenly act like she wants to be with me.

[chloe56]

I can't sleep, I am hurting again. I can't even bear the thought of dating anyone, I have cancelled dates, not picked up calls. Feels like I am regressing.

 

Why, why, why??????? why can't I just let go? I haven't seen you in more than a year, it really is tearing me apart again, I keep hoping to catch a glimpse of you somewhere, I keep mistaking strangers for you on the street.

 

And the silence...

Are you okay? Do I mean anything to you at all? obviously not. why am I crying all the time again?

[visualbasicide]

I can't sleep, I am hurting again. I can't even bear the thought of dating anyone, I have cancelled dates, not picked up calls. Feels like I am regressing.

 

Why, why, why??????? why can't I just let go? I haven't seen you in more than a year, it really is tearing me apart again, I keep hoping to catch a glimpse of you somewhere, I keep mistaking strangers for you on the street.

 

And the silence...

Are you okay? Do I mean anything to you at all? obviously not. why am I crying all the time again?

 

Don't get frustrated. Took me a year and a half to balance out and I still have my off days. I know others that have taken less or more time, it varies from person to person. Just hang in there.

[chloe56]

Don't get frustrated. Took me a year and a half to balance out and I still have my off days. I know others that have taken less or more time, it varies from person to person. Just hang in there.

 

 

hey, thanks for that. I have been thinking I seem to dwell in the past too much, one step forward five steps back.

 

I need to get over this, just have to.

[visualbasicide]

I don't know if you were the dumper or the dumpee, I was the dumpee myself.

 

If you are like I was, dwelling on it probably indicates there is some part of it you haven't accepted yet, more than likely how they can seem to forget you so easily, you are hurt and they don't seem to care and you can't understand how it's possible after all you put into it, nothing you said or did mattered at the end and it doesn't make a lick of sense to you. If that is the case:

 

The answer to that conundrum is because they were selfish. Period. It's really as ugly, basic and simple as it sounds. Took me a long time to get that concept drilled in real good. Once I did, it got easier moving forward.

 

Yes I have my faults, and I could have done this, or could have done that, blah blah blah. The bottom line is I deserve a hell of a lot better than someone that shallow, ignorant, stupid and selfish.

 

Hope you figure out the same thing. Give it more time and you will.

[c0nfuzd]

I know you said there is no chance for us, that the marriage is over, but I will always hang on to hope; I know I did you wrong honey and I am so sorry for it; stupid I was that I couldn't see it till it was "too late"...but it's never too late, I refuse to believe it

 

you have said that I have changed and I will stick to these changes; no more weed and no more hatred towards you or the kids; as you see me today, expect it tomorrow; you know that I am not a bulls****er, I never have lied to you or cheated on you...so why is it you question my changes? why can't you believe that I have seen the light? that no drugs are more precious to me than you and the kids are...I believe in the vows we exchanged 10 years ago and I also believed you when you said them....why do you want out now? I know my emotional abuse and negativity and drug use over the years have brought you to this point-of-no-return, but how can you not even care about giving us a chance for the kids' sake? why won't you even consider counseling? we spent 15 years together and now you want out? so much effort and time we spent on this relationship...we have a house, 2 cars and 2 kids; why do you want to complicate things now? how can you honestly believe that divorce is the answer to our problems? especially when you see that 4 months later I have not regressed to my old ways...you will never have an argument with me again about our past because I now know that I am 100% guilty and shoulder the entire blame for the failure of our marriage

 

I want you to believe in us and not give up...your entire family is telling you not to give up so don't...I know that I can make you happy again, just give me one last chance and forgive me...so that our kids can also grow in marriage, not a divorce

 

I miss you sooooooooooooooooo much and I can't wait for us to share the same bed again; I am giving you the space you want and for as long as you want; I don't want sex from you anymore, I just want my life companion back so that we can grow old together and keep our family intact

[eidolon]

I miss you. It's your birthday on Friday. I want to wish you a happy birthday but I know you won't care to hear from me.

Jeg savner deg veldig mye.

[TragicAlliance]

Right as I was about to finish deleting you off everything last night, you showed up and started talking to me. You threw me a crumb and I ravenously went for it.

 

I still am not convinced that you would ever "sink so low" as to let me see how you really feel... if you're truly miserable or if you've gone on and are happier that I've cut the cord. You tell me you want to spend your life with me and then you go off for days or weeks at a time... mixed signals much, hon?

 

Meanwhile, I have been an open book with you. I've told you just about everything you ever needed/wanted to know... and hell, even some things you could've probably gone without. Why? Because I trusted in you. And what happened... I guess you took advantage of my openness. I guess maybe I brought that on myself.

 

I knew last night when we got on the topic of the ultimatum that things were going to spiral. I'm sorry I ever mentioned it, because I knew where I stood on that issue. I should've swallowed it and let it go. But now you don't have to deal with that ultimatum ever hitting the table as I've already bowed out. In other words... you won.

 

You have too much pride and too much ego to ever let me know how you really feel about anything. And that has driven a massive wedge between you and I.

 

You want me back and seriously mean it? - Make an effort. Little gestures of affection, subtle and without my prodding/hinting. Write me a letter for God's sake, I don't want anything fancy. Learn some humility and come to me openly and honestly about how you feel. Cry on my shoulder - let me know that you do need me. Stop keeping me at arm's length and hold me in your arms instead. Start treating me like your equal, not your inferior.

 

PS: I would give up my hobbies for you again in a heartbeat. All you'd have to do is snap your fingers and tell me when, and I'd let it go. I'd give up anything for you - that's because I care. I just sometimes wish I didn't care so damn much.

[Jonnyy]

To my ex:

 

i cant believe that you just threw all we had together out the window for some guy you just met who is way too old for you. You have completely changed who you are as a person. The new you is immature, childish, and not kind to me at all. You were the one who always said we were going to get married, that we were going to last forever. You dont even care how much pain and suffering you caused me and to top it all off you blame me for why the breakup happened when i had been nothing but kind, sweet, and an amazing boyfriend to you. You may want to explore the college experience because you are following in the footsteps of your very emotionally immature friend, but let me tell you that you are going to regret everything. Im not always going to be there to take you back when your infatuation with this guy ends. 2 years down the drain, for a guy who youve known for a couple months and was engaged and still hitting on you! im completely dumbfounded that you dont see anything wrong with what youre doing. Youve been so mean to me, swore at me, and just plain out yelled at me and then say im the one who is mean and doesnt care. You are selfish, and i am no longer feeding your ego. You need to learn for yourself that you ****ed up.

 

To guy who ex went to immediately after breakup:

 

I trusted my gf with you and you disrespected our relationship. Ive never even met you and you have the nerve to call me an *******?! Dude, you ended your engagement for a girl you just met that is 18 when your 24. You ****ed up big time. Once your guys' infatuation for each other begins to dwindle, you will both be in a world of hurt emotionally. Frankly, i find you as a creep. I swear to god if you hurt my ex i will put so much hurt on you. I find you as a liar. You lied to my gf about when your engagement ended and why. You have stolen her from me, but you have the new and very unattractive new girl. I would like my old gf back. I cant believe she chose you over me when ive been amazing to her. I cant believe she took yourside when you called me an ******* and saying i couldnt talk to her when ive never even met you or talked to you before. You are the ******* sir. Take this however you want, but you are a creep, your a liar, and i dont find you as a good person one bit. Once my ex realizes this you will be in the alley buddy. Stop being a fake piece of ****. I dont find it appropriate to hate anyone really, but its people like you who drive me dangerously close to hatred.

[Coupedriver]

Don't encourage me, science is dangerous enough without people like me tinkering with it.

 

 

Tinker away MAN..!!!!!!!!!! Hell I will even start a fund for you...!!!!!!

[Coupedriver]

I really dont know what to say to you Jess....I guess I am still numb after all of these months.I CANT believe I GAVE you SO MUCH...Watched your daughter EVERY WEEKEND,gave up my friends, so you could go to work.Rushed to your side NO matter what time of day or night.!! ALWAYS there for you...took you out of a hell house you were living in so you and you daughter could have a safe,dry and warm house to stay in.Bought EVERYTHING you wanted....spoiled the F*CKING hell out of you.Gave you money when you were broke...( while I went without..).. LIED on your taxes so you could get more money...and you tell me.." I am the BEST thing that has ever happened to you...I am your BEST friend..I never has so MUCH in common with anyone before...the BEST I have ever had in bed..I WILL NEVER LIE OR CHEAT ON YOU..!!!!!!!!!" and then DO WHAT THE F&CK you did to me...!!!!!!!!!!????????????? And then ask me "How are things going over there.?!?!!?" Strip me down to NOTHING....I am NO ONE...I cry all day...I cant listen to a radio..I have to go to counseling...I have to take medicine so I can sleep....medicine so I can eat. They think I am going to take my own life because the pain is SO AWFUL....Family wont even talk to me anymore...they are so tired of hearing about it.You think that little F&CK your with is worth MORE then me..?!?!??!??

 

 

Think he will TREAT you better....??!?!? I HOPE and PRAY he ****s all over you parade...I WOULD LOVE to be there when it happens..I once was someone...now I am just someone with a broken heart who wishes he go only go 1 day without this feeling...just 1 day.I lived and breathed for you...kept your head on "STRAIGHT" you told me once...Dont know where you would be if I wasnt there for you....WHERE THE F*CK are you now Jess..?!?!? I wish I could give you what I feel...Let you know how it is for people like me..Like I said before..If the Devil wanted to make a deal...I would...I will ask this question for the rest of my life...."How is it possible for ONE person to do this to another,and then act like like its just another day for them..???!??"

 

I HOPE one day you do call and want to get back together...what fun I would have with that day....Karma is coming Jess...and its headed right for you...and YES people..there is a TON of anger.....

[MisterB]

E ,

 

Tonight would have been our two year anniversary. Tough day for me today , no matter how much I tried not to think about it , it still creeped up in my head. I was driving home from school , just dazing at the road and I got tirey eyed just thinking about never being with you again. You use to say you loved me more , clearly we know that wasn't true. 5 months later I still adore you , still think your the girl for me , still would give you the moon. We broke up once and we never got a second chance , because you didn't want it. That will haunt me for the rest of my life. The fact that we were so serious with each other , and it all went to **** after one break up. Together a year and seven months and dating for a year and eight months and we were done after one failure. The unfair part is you know I changed were I needed too , I realized the mistakes I made , and the second time around would have been 10x better. And not like if our relationship wasn't good already , we had our minor problems but besides that it was great , you agreed.

 

Your birthday is coming in a week. And as much as I wish I could be there for you I'm not. I'm not going to call , not going to text. When you ended it again last week , saying there was nothing there anymore , I lost respect for you. You knew I was having fun enjoying my life , and you decided to come back and make it seem like you wanted me again. For a whole month we talked like we were going to get bavk together. And from one day to another you pulled the plug again. You made me take steps back in my healing , making it seem like you wanted me again. But what goes around comes around , so I almost feel sorry for you. If you don't want to give me a second chance , I hope you NEVER contact me again. One day I will love a girl worthy of my love again.

[dicky_fish]

Come home Fairy Fi xxx

[LuluinAZ]

Dear S,

 

From what I know, you won't be coming back, and I don't blame you. It's easier to see now how you have detached yourself so you can move forward and be happy. The thing is, we were never anything but wonderful and loving to each other, our timing was just terrible.

 

I could be there helping you now, visiting with your family, enjoying all of it. I hoped you would see how genuine my feelings for you are and that I want what you wanted all along. I just wasn't ready, and now that I am, it's too late. I'm sorry.

 

You fed me big lumps of goopy love and helped me heal and I'm forever grateful to you. My heart will always call out to yours, and sometimes, you will hear it and know how much you mean to me, now and always. I'd take a bullet for you. Please know, I'm going to finish becoming a whole person now, without you, because life is good and enough time has gone by wasted. We really aren't hollow logs, and look at you! You are happy in a new relationship now. I'm sorry I made a fool of myself trying to convince you that I am really ready this time for what you have been offering. If you ever come back, I want to be the best I can be, that's what you deserve, if not it's what I deserve. Still, there were some things you said which made me think you might be back, weren't there? Were you flipping things with me? Probably not, you are in a relationship, you told me.

 

I'm getting it together now, really. I'll get going and make plans, maybe I'll go to Paris alone, it's still there, right? Didn't you call me Baby on that call? Please come back, I want to do it all with you.

 

I love you,

 

L

[Unrequitedlove]

I miss you everyday. Do you miss me the same?*

 

It's hard waking up in the morning. It's as if I'm getting slapped in the face with reality each and every time I wake up. It hurts, but I'm numb now. I don't know what I want. Maybe I want you to feel the pain that I do. Maybe I want you to want me. Maybe I want what we had again. How could you ruin me? After all that I've done for you? What makes your life so much more wholesome now that I'm not in it? I thought I completed you. Now you make me feel like I never mattered to begin with. It hurts the most knowing what you're doing now. I don't know, but I wonder, and since I'm thinking of it so much, it turns into the truth.*You're sleeping with other women. More attractive women. You're spending all of you free time with them. You're charming their pants off, wining and dining them, just like you did to me when we started dating.

 

I want to be able to see you. I want to speak to you. You haven't made any effort in doing so, and that should be my closure, but somehow I can't shake the feelings I once felt for you and how genuine they were.

[Niaka44]

Tomorrow marks 7 weeks since our breakup, and yesterday marked 3 weeks of absolute NC. I woke up today and just knew it was going to be one of those days. I haven't had one for a long time, but now here I am, unable to stop my thoughts of you. I've gone through so many stages since I left you, and not in any order I would have predicted for myself. It seemed to go something like: relief, regret, pain, anger, a plateau of apathy, and now I'm back to regret.

 

To be honest though, there's that lingering sting of regret underneath everything every day. I was never sure if leaving you was really what I wanted to do. I mean, it WASN'T what I wanted: it's just what I thought was necessary. And in some ways, I am better off. I won't deny that. But in walking away from you, I walked away from not only a year+ of a relationship but multiple years of friendship. You meant so much to me long before I fell in love with you. I don't know how we ended up here; I just know I'm the one who led us to this place. It's easy to look back and pretend you were perfect and blame everything on myself, but I have to hold onto the truth that both of us did some things wrong, and ultimately we weren't the best match, maybe not even as friends. I honestly don't know if I can ever truly be your friend again after all the things that have been said and done. And I'm so sorry for my part in that.

 

I deleted your number from my phone, but I can't delete it from my mind. Yours was one of the few I had memorized. Sometimes I pick up my phone wanting so badly to send a text just asking how you are, but I don't do it. I still check your Facebook sometimes. Deleting you did nothing at all since you have no privacy settings. Sometimes I want to send you a friend request because I feel like such a stupid drama queen for defriending you in the first place, but it seems like that would make me look even worse. I don't know. I just wish things had turned out differently, better. I never wanted this for us. We were supposed to be the ones who held on even after we let go of the romance. I never even wanted to let go of the f*cking romance. I wanted you. I always wanted you. I just wasn't sure if you truly wanted me in your life, and I couldn't live with the uncertainty. To be honest, I'm still bitter and I do still blame you for refusing to talk anything through with me and making me feel like I was constantly running into a wall. But it's all in the past now, and I've been okay, I really have. I know I've been doing things right, taking it one day at a time, and I'll continue to do so. I just want you to know that I still miss you, but I'm only going to tell you on here.

[c0nfuzd]

My Sunshine,

 

Every morning I wake up in that dreaded basement bed and I hate myself for the place we are in now; I just can't shake it off. Then I see you all dressed up and ready to go to work. You look absolutely gorgeous. Your beauty is immeasurable. I tell you how pretty the dress looks on you, you give me the same reply thanks. And then I watch you take care of the kids by waking them up, dressing them, feeding them and getting them ready for school. All the while, I try to help in any way I can but can see how useless I am to you. You don't need me. You barely even make eye contact with me. Although I am still in this house, I know that you have checked out and that you are really an exW. Everyone tells me there is hope but I have all but lost it. Once I am recovered from the surgery, how long before you serve me with the papers?

 

All these years of marriage will soon be but a distant memory. And I am the only one to blame for it all. How terrible these drugs have acted on me. They are truly a gateway to hell. That temporary bliss they provided is now replaced with permanent damage on the whole family. I have lost so much because of them. Now, even though the drugs are gone, nothing else seems to improve. It's like a neverending punishment and nightmare. I'm sorry baby for everything I have done. I don't deserve you. If you do go ahead with the divorce, I understand. I sincerely hope you find happiness and peace without me around. But I know that if you still give us one last chance, you will never regret it. Just believe.

[Arikel]

I miss you. Its hard not picking up the phone to call you .. but when I actually hold the phone, it's also hard to call you. So yeah, I miss you. I miss the company we shared, and just watching TV together and just sharing a bed together. I miss the part of you that you showed me, the caring part, the small part that actually kind of loved me. I wish it were a bigger part of you, but it is what it is

[A7X]

<insert profanity here> You treated me with no respect, like I never mattered to you in your life <insert profanity here> I never thought I would say this, but I hate you for your actions.

[Lis007]

Darling M,

 

For you, I am making a book of memories to give to you for our 20th wedding anniversary, along with the painting I have done of us. Its bitter sweet going back through diaries and reading about our life together...

 

I wonder if I will even give it to you I am just thinking unrealistically perhaps that making it will help us reconnect and not give up on the 24 years we have been together.

 

I Miss you and I want so much for us to hold each other and put the past behind us and add new chapters to our life story.

 

You will always be my sweetheart and the love of my life

 

Love Me xxxxxxxxxx

[CopingGal]

Hi L.

 

I am glad you called me. I am glad that we decided to be civil to each other since we have to live in the same town. I listen to the message on the answering machine about 4 times...you have such a beautiful voice. But then I asked my roommate to destroy it. You treated me badly. Now you give your new gf everything. You told me you have no remorse for what you did to me. I can never take you back.

 

-S

[LuluinAZ]

Hi S,

 

You'll be proud to hear I didn't cry at all yesterday. I did a couple of things that took courage. I reached out to a lot of people that have gone neglected during my depression.... I even planned a surprise for CW, instead of being lethargic and making her do all the work in our friendship. I got in touch with my sister too.. this week I reached out to all my peeps.

 

It's plain you have moved on and I have to accept that. So there will be setbacks... if this is a roller coaster ride, I'm not sure if this is the going up part where the car tick tick ticks going up, or the plunge. Either way, I'm getting out of the house and going on the ride. FWIW, I love you!

 

Lulu