Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[Marsil]

"Someone Like You"

 

I heard that you're settled down

That you found a girl and you're married now.

I heard that your dreams came true.

Guess she gave you things I didn't give to you.

 

Old friend, why are you so shy?

Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light.

 

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited

But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.

I had hoped you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded

That for me it isn't over.

 

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you too

Don't forget me, I beg

I remember you said,

"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,

Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead,"

Yeah.

 

You know how the time flies

Only yesterday was the time of our lives

We were born and raised

In a summer haze

Bound by the surprise of our glory days

 

....

....

Nothing compares

No worries or cares

Regrets and mistakes

They are memories made.

Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

 

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

I wish nothing but the best for you

Don't forget me, I beg

I remember you said,

"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead."

[sandybeaches]

S -

 

Your memory suffocates me. I need to get over you because it is the only change I have at finding peace.

 

I think you are going to Ibiza for work in January - or maybe you are already there. I guess this is the new hope you were referring to in your Hotmail status.

 

God works in strange ways. As you know, I connected with an old friend of mine who is part of your past. I didn't track her down to trash your name. I did it because I thought she might help me win you back. I never knew your story.

 

I learned that while I loved you with all my heart - I didn't even look at another man for nearly three years - you never felt the same way I did. You were even engaged for a time and I had no idea. I wonder if this was the big secret you needed to tell me. She told me what you did to her ... it's hard for me to believe this is the same guy who told me how much he wanted to find love and have a family. The sweet guy who was a bit nervous and shy when we had our first kiss in Penn Station. I gasped when I learned the truth about you. I wonder if you knew how much you hurt her. If you did, I don't know how you could sleep at night.

 

I then read the emails I sent to you after I found out about your other girlfriend. Like me, she went to see you to claim her man. Perhaps I lost it a bit and looked a tad crazy. But what struck me the most was your reply. Your excuse was a joke. No one with a brain would believe that this woman was a business contact. There was no passion, no regret, no sorrow in your words to me. Given that she is still in your life, I have to guess that she bought the story you told her about me. No questions asked.

 

Only a person whose heart was broken would respond with so much anger and hurt. It's what people in love do. The opposite of love isn't hate, it's indifference. Your reply showed how little you cared. You didn't try to make me stay. You didn't tell me you loved me. Nothing. Three years gone in an instant.

 

I'm not even sure what I want anymore. I'm fighting a battle I can't win and that has absolutely no reward. We can never "be" again. I don't trust you and if you came within 30 feet of me, my friends would stomp your a**. The one who would benefit would be YOU.

 

Funny how I'm the one who is broken up when you are the one who got more from this.

Edited December 5, 2011 by sandybeaches

[Chs]

Seeing you with someone else has been the most painful experience in all my life. I was unable to let go of the hope that you would come back to me, and you already being with him is so hard to deal with. You must understand that i your happyness is important to me, and i wish you two the best. That you can find someone else so fast just shows you are a strong person, and im glad you aren't in my position.

 

I miss you like crazy, and as much as seeing a new picture of you makes my heart stop beating and my temperature rise so much. I can't for the life of me imagine another girl in my bed, because you are the most sexy and amazing person i have ever met and no one can fill that void. I dream of you day and night, and i would give up anything to be with you again.

[BigDumbFoot]

Don't know what to do with my life since you've left. I'm completely freaking lost now. Jesus, why did I invest so much time into doing what you wanted to do?? Why wasn't I letting my own needs be met?? Why wasn't I working on my life, and my needs/wants?? What the hell was I thinking. I didn't want to lose you! I was too afraid of confrontation, and for what?? Now I'm barely a man because all my effort was going into satisfying you, and ensuring YOU were happy. But you barely cared about me. I mean, you barely put any effort into me. Relationships are a two way street. I figure you either had no interest in me as a person, or you just took me for granted. All the love I put out there for you, and you didn't even give a ****. You just hopped a ride with the next guy as soon as you could.. as soon as you decided you were over and done with me. Which is ok.. This really shows me your true colors. It really shows me the person you are, and probably were this whole time. I'm not saying that you are evil or bad by any stretch of the imagination. But you are definitely very self-centered. And pretty vain too. Not that I'm perfect by any means. But at least I can recognize my own imperfections.

 

Despite all of this I still waste so much time pining over you and pouring over the past we had together. Don't get me wrong, we had some pretty great times. But.. were we ever really right for one another?? The more time goes by the more I'd have to say the answer to that is no. Just because we were really good friends and got along great, doesn't mean that we were right together. How could we ever be right for one another when for you it was always 'take take take'. That's all you did in that relationship! I'm so done with being depressed and insecure over this whole thing. This shouldn't have been such a blow to my self-esteem. I shouldn't have let it come to this! I'm just as much to blame as you are! How could I be so stupid as to attach on to you without ever giving myself what I needed to grow.. It was a stifling and suffocating relationship! Now I'm sick and tired all the damn time. **** you. **** you being so selfish, **** you for not ending this earlier.. for dragging it on like you did.

[sandybeaches]

I am fighting a battle that I can't win and one that has absolutely no reward.

 

Why do I do it?

 

I want to believe the man I loved for three years isn't such a coward and a liar.

 

I want to know what the hell is wrong with you. On our second date, you told me how much you wanted love in your life and how jealous you were of people who had it. The universe sent you many good women and you hurt every one of them.

 

I want to know why it was so easy for you to walk away from me.

[sao2]

Hi *****,

I am not somehow more confident in our diverging paths as you imagined I would be. You know the ultimatum, my huge mistake, has eaten away at me for the last 2.5 years. It was a huge mistake. I hope one day, you can understand that I wasn't a bad person, but rather a person like any other, who makes mistakes and has faults. I have said it before, the ultimatum was borne of frustration. It does not make it justifiable, but I hope that one day you can at least understand and perhaps even validate that the frustration I felt was not unreasonable. I really did feel as if I had spent four years trying to be in a relationship with you and you spent four years resisting while not letting go either.

 

I don't view you as a bad person, and despite your thoughts to the contrary, I thought you were the one for me for so long. You affected a change in me, a change in my personality for the better that I could not understand, and then one day, you were just . . . gone.

 

Sure, you were an occasional message in my email, a disconnected voice over the phone, a goodnight text, but once you got to *******, it just felt like you were . . .

 

I know I didn't help matters when I panicked. ****** **** was a difficult time for me. I am sorry for making your time in ******* more difficult due to my own anxiety.

 

I still think so very highly of you. But I think you made mistakes, and those mistakes did affect me. I was hurt by a severe lack of communication during that time and after you got back. I understand you felt pressure from me, pressure to answer questions you didn't have answers to. Still, somehow I feel that if you would have been communicating with me on a regular basis we would have figured it out.

 

All you ever had to say to get rid of me was "****, I don't feel the same way." and I would crawl into a hole and you would never have to hear from me again. But you didn't say that. Instead you place all the blame on my shoulders because of stupid mistakes I made and frustration that I felt. Thus forcing me to live with this guilt. That, is your biggest mistake as far as I am concerned.

 

Anyways, I will not bother you anymore as I am sure you are moving on with your life. I will move on with my life as well. I have gotten good at living my life without you. I just wish we could have made it work.

 

You don't know what "always" means until you have woken up every day for six years with hope that this is the day that the person you love decides to be a part of your life again.

****

[Kamila]

Hey there,

 

I feel better, really I do, I'm placing you in my heart, I'm accepting that we're not together anymore, I'm accepting the break-up, I accept that you're up there, and I'm down here.

 

Hum, does that mean I'm moving on ? Cos I feel so lonely, but at the same time I'm cherishing my freedom. I can do what the hell that I want. And that is awesome. I'm not afraid of telling people I'm single and nearly 30. Ha !

 

So what do I want to say ? I'm happy ? I'm fine being what I am right now ?

 

Don't get me wrong, but I still get flashs of our early encounter and how we were madly in love and making out in the back of your car. I'll just cherish those sweet hot memories now eh.

 

I must admit you had the most gorgeous body, smile, face, hair, everything. MMMM.... I don't regret that at all. Your personality, mmm, a bit of a bad character eh ? You should work on that. You're not getting anywhere when you're a badass. Just try in being more nice and polite.

 

But I guess you'll learn that at uni now. You'll mature, and be more responsible.

 

We had bad timing eh ?

 

Everything was up against us, the distance, the situation of us, the political views, the ideas on life. Except for our love, that was the only thing that kept us together for 2.5 years.

 

It's not fair, but in retrospect, isn't it better ?

 

I've been replaced to another workplace and I wouldn't have made it if I had moved to your city to live with you. Seems like my gut instinct and head was right.

 

Being with you was wrong, it was not meant to be.

 

I wish you also think that and that you haven't got much trouble with the fact I went no contact honey ? You know why I did eh ? I just wanted it to stop, I wanted you to stop screwing with my head, my heart, my feelings, my everything. I lost control of myself and I had to regain that by pushing you aside. No friends, no nothing. I had to be purged of you. You were no good, but good for me to learn me about bounderies. I learned you.

[LostJustLost]

Evenin' love.. I thought I had a pretty good grip on things until tonight when Bently got into an argument with himself in the mirror and the first thing that popped into my head was I cant wait to tell *** about this!

 

But you're not here for me to tell anymore. You walked away without so much as a farewell whisper or nod in my direction. I still cant believe I ment so little to you that you just.. left.

 

I read threads here about how you may have felt, how you may feel, why you might have left, trying to understand, trying to cope, trying to get myself back on an even keel. But what I need, what I really need yall to man up babe. Sadly I've come to believe that will never happen and that makes me want to cry. Even if it's an email it would really help me sort all this mess out. I doubt myself on every turn now, my confidence is gone. I was wrong about you, I was wrong about us, ya know? I've stopped talking about anything to anyone because I don't believe in anything anymore.

 

Like I said, thought I had a better grip on things until tonight. This involuntary roller coaster ride yall threw me on is on a straight down shot tonight.

 

I would like to get off now.

[foolishlover]

morning _____

 

Its been 2 weeks and in all honesty, i thought i was holding out pretty well. I cried every single day for the first week and then i slowly picked myself up. I tried to look objectively at our relationship and it was when I saw the problems we had that I realised breaking up was probably for the best.

 

I do look back and think how you would have viewed me. We were on and off and i was crying my eyes out asking for you to stay with me. I cant believe i stooped to that level and i am certain I will never do that again.

 

For some reason, I am feeling the pain and hurt all over again this morning. I am crying and i dont know why. I was doing ok the past few days.

 

I also had a dream about you. I went to your place and everything was changed and rearranged. Everything I gave you was thrown out.

 

You know, i am reading these forums and it gives me some solace. I try to deny it, but somehow it gives me hope that in 2 months or so you will actually start to miss me. In all reality, I know that you wont miss me. You didnt even shed a tear when we broke up. You are enjoying your freedom and I hate it how you come out unscathed.

 

I think about you everyday. Every. Single. Day. I also hate how it is xmas and new years. It makes the loneliness that much heavier.

 

I know we will run into each other in the new year and i honestly dont know how i will cope when i see you. I will try to put on a fake smile, but seeing you in the flesh, seeing you happily moved on and living your life will cut me so deep, that i do not know how I will hold myself when that day comes.

[SelfCentered]

Hi

 

**** YOU

 

Regards

[Sugarkane]

Dear ex, I had to breakup with someone earlier this year. Unlike you I didn't dump them by text, refuse to talk to them let alone meet them. And above all I didn't blame everything on them and verbally abuse them by text. then call them crazy. I hope someone's screwed you over. Thanx a**hole.

[sandybeaches]

A little reminder popped up on my calendar, telling me to order your birthday gift: a Kenneth Cole travel bag and a buckwheat pillow for your work travels.

 

They were already in my Amazon shopping cart. I place the order twice and canceled it once. Why? Because a part deep inside of me still loves you. Because I hope you can set your life straight. Because I was taught love is the strongest force on earth.

[OnyxSnowfall]

Despite all of the chaos and all of the misunderstandings and all of the actual errors that we both made --- you are truly a beautiful person. I know we met and fell in love at the wrong time... within circumstances that seemed extremely hopeless.

 

As much as I've been aware of our vastly different perceptions and our strange incompatibilities (some of them stemming from good places within us both), I wanted us to be together. I still ****ing do. It's only day two of no contact and I'm having such a difficult time believing you're really gone. Stupid tears are streaming down my cheeks. I hate that I well up with such sorrow.

 

And somehow I have to be strong. And go forward, and know, that you are too. I miss you and I hope you're doing better than I am right now. Gah.

[LostJustLost]

Today was a very dangerous day for me baby and I wanted to run to you, tell y'all everything that happened, have you reassure me... You were always my rock in the struggle to stay clean, you always got me to be strong.

 

But.. you're not there anymore.

 

I wanted to ***.. god I wanted to. I wanted that feeling so ******* badly, to not feel the pain for just one day, one hour, one minute. Instead I said yeah, thanks but no, I cant. I've got the kids and bolted for *****s house. I almost turned around at the end of the lane, at the corner, at the T-road.. all the way to her place.

 

I pray that I can do the same if the opportunity arises again. God I hope Im stronger then I think I am. I hate that every thing that happens makes me want to run to you, to talk to you, to share it with you. I hate that I can't seem to make sense of any of this, that I can't seem to stop needing and wanting y'all in my life. I hate that I've lost my strength, my self confidence. Most of all I hate that I still love you with all my heart, or what's left of it. ~L

[EyeAlone]

Dear N***

 

Hey, I hope you're happy now. I bet you feel so ****ing relieved that you don't have to put on your act anymore and pretend to love me. I wonder why you pretended for such a long time...I bet it was because you knew you wouldn't be able to find any other girl to be with you so you had to string me along. I hate that you lied to me. You told me that you would be honest with me...so why the **** did you wait so ****ing long to tell me? Well he's some **** that I want to tell you.

 

**** that I hated about you and I'm so glad I'll never have to deal with again:

 

-You never explicitly said "I love you." That should have been a huge flag to me that you were hiding something.

-You didn't put in nearly as much effort as I did into the relationship. Yeah you said you were busy, but I'm busy too and I still managed.

-You were really pushing the boundaries with your female friends.

-I was so sick and tired of hearing about your exes. I never gave a flying **** about how awesome T***** was. You knew that and yet you blabbered on. I don't care what you told me; you never moved on from her. Never.

-You told me that you weren't passive aggressive and yet you always made stupid comments about me and my "other boyfriends." If you had a problem, then you should have said something. Oh wait. You were too busy ACTING.

-I know guys don't talk about their emotions as much as women do but you took the ****ing cake. You even admitted that you present yourself as a "character." Wtf? That's another flag that I should have noticed. You never told anyone anything about yourself.

-Speaking of talking, you didn't tell anyone about me nor allowed me to meet your friends. ****tard.

-You room is a mess. Clean it up.

-You're so neglectful. I feel bad for your pets.

-Most of all, you ****ing lied for 8 months.

 

You told me that I probably wouldn't want to be friends with you after the break up. No ****, dumbass. But you know what? Even if I never dated you, I don't even think I could be your friend knowing what I know now about you.

 

Oh yeah, I saw that you emailed me about my Scrabble board game and fudge pan at your place. Do you really think I'm that stupid to go over to your place and see your stupid face to get something that I could replace otherwise? **** you, you're not getting off that easy.

 

Good ****ing bye.

 

EyeAlone

 

PS. Last night I threw away your expensive shirt that you left at my place. This morning I heard the garbage truck emptying the dumpster. Adios!

[sandybeaches]

S -

 

I was never a jealous woman and I thought it was awesome that you had so many female friends. Now that I know things weren't how they seemed, I wonder how many of these friends were something more.

 

You had no boundaries. You told women what they wanted to hear. Not for their benefit but because you wanted their devotion. You wanted to hear how smart, handsome and fabulous you are.

 

I still wonder what happened to you. What turned this shy guy into such a cruel jerk? Why couldn't you be happy with what you had instead of needing so many women to adore you? The women you pick are as damaged as you are.

 

I knew all this about you but I wanted to be an exception to your rule. I thought if I could just love you enough, you'd love yourself and then you would love me. But it was also a way for me not to fully invest myself in a relationship because I knew this only had an outside change of working. I am the wrong religion, older than you are ... you never invested as much as I did. I sent you a birthday gift. You sent me a happy birthday email on Facebook. How is that even remotely close to how a boyfriend should act?

 

I did a lot of lying to myself and I made a lot of excuses for you. I could have made you really happy but you never would have made me happy in the long run.

[Lis007]

I still love you xxxxxxxxx

[Butterfly21]

Tonight is a real bad night. I really want to message you and tell you how much i am hurting. I wonder if you even realise what damage you have done! I am broken. I have nothing left...for no one. Not even myself

I feel empty..

 

We haven't really spoken much but every time you do message me you hurt me a little more. Why?? Why can't you just leave me be. Do you not think you have done enough? Please just leave me be. I can not deal with this anymore. I know everyone is right and i should just block you from messaging me, but the only reason i did keep you unblocked from my messenger was to hear about the divorce. Even though you message me about the divorce you feel the need to brag about how wonderful your life is and make comments about how you want to make sure this is deff the end so you can do stuff with other girls.

 

Yesterday you said our marriage was done ages ago. I feel like i wasted all that energy that i had left for nothing. I let you break me and now i have no one to pick me up. Im lucky that i have a wonderful family who is supportive but i don't want them to see how much i am really hurting. That is why i usually cry in the middle of the night once everyone goes to bed.

 

I don't feel anyone around me understands how i feel. How could you put me through all this..You abused my heart, my head, my soul and i don't know how i am ever going to be happy again. It is like no matter how hard i try i just can't pick myself up. I don't want ''time to heal'' I wan't to erase it from my life now!

 

Sounds like you already have a new gf and we aren't even divorced yet, haven't even been apart 2 months yet..Please don't abuse her too. No one deserves to go through what you put me through. I know i wasn't perfect but i would never dare treating someone i love the way you did me. I loved you so much and tried to be the perfect wife for you and you always threw it back in my face why?

 

I wish i knew how to deal with this. I wonder if you even care?

[punkinless]

i don't think you know how much you can hurt. u prolly think i'm doing just fine. well its an act.

 

ur bro says you have done nothing but smile the past 2 months. good for you. ur now happy. i just wish you didn't have to take all my happyness to get it.

[EyeAlone]

N***,

 

Please get out of my head. I want to sleep without the assistance of medication and/or alcohol.

 

Thank you.

[sandybeaches]

Today is a rough one ... two months ago I left you at the airport. The last image I have of you is tears pouring out of your eyes and you saying you love me so much. I know you are scum and I don't want you back. The crazy thing is, I don't even know why I'm upset anymore. You are an asshat, I have proof that you were one before yor met me, and you are never going to change. I think there is a piece of me that thinks if only I built shrines to you online, if only I was a young virginal Muslim woman you would have treated me better.

 

Why am I so insane??????

[Nikki Sahagin]

I dreamnt about you last night.

 

In my dream we were invited to a party at my aunts house, and you turned up with friends. I avoided you, and you pulled me to the side and said you'd grown up and regretted what you'd done and wanted to be with me again. You text me a list of everything that had happened since we'd been apart; what you'd done and who you'd slept with, and said that you just wanted to be with me.

 

I woke up and felt...weird.

 

Deep down I know I'm not over it completely. Otherwise why would it come back to haunt me every now and then?

 

I guess its just one of those days and i've been depressed all day since that dream.

 

Still, I hope life is being good to you.

[LostJustLost]

Hey baby.. its just me, avoiding contact by posting here again. Seems I'm not as good at hiding my emotions as I thought I was. The kids came over yesterday morning with coffee, dew and muffins. They sat at the kitchen table and ***** said Mommmm.. can we talk? I arched an eyebrow and thought o'great, what's the drama now.

 

But it wasn't like that. ***** looked at me with sincere concern in her eyes, ***** was all marine, pushing a napkin around in front of him for a bit then looked up and said point blank "We want our mom back, not the shell that's taking up space." It was a short conversation, they didn't pry, both of them called it as they saw it, just like they were raised to do. God it was tough to keep from reacting, really tough, but the more they talked, the more I realized just how much was passing me by because I'm still lost without you.

 

I didn't have the tree up, didn't have any decorations out, I hadn't bothered with voluenteering to make any goodies or snacks for the Christmas gathering. What slapped me in the face was realizing I have not done anything with the little ones that wasn't an automatic action or reaction since yall left. There's no mess under the table from paper chains and homemade cards, no pile of mixing bowls or cookie cutters waiting to be washed in the sink, no smells of anything but cigarette smoke near the back door. And no, ***, I'm not blaming you. This isn't on you, darlin, its on me, yep, y'all took the cowards way out and left without warning but I'm the one who chose to stop living.

 

Shame on me.

 

I don't miss you any less, and I will always love you but it's time to suck it up and stop missing out on what I've got right here in front of me. You're gone, they're still here. And they actually care. Lucky for me they don't care how long I wasn't myself, they only care that I'm finding my way home.

[Lis007]

Dinner tonight with the kids was so much fun and we were all so happy... just like old times huh?

 

2 weeks ago you said lets talk... but you haven't said when that might happen... I know work is busy leading up to Christmas and you don't need anymore stress but I just worry that after Christmas there will be another reason to avoid us talking. Don't get me wrong we communicate brilliantly around the kids but you just can't communicate with me on a personal level just the two of us... well you choose not to...

 

I am never going to give up on us... and whether people think I am a doormat or not I am waiting here for you for us and I know in my heart that we will get through this and our love will shine again...

 

Forever yours xxx

[karmaqueen]

I know you are still lying your way through life. If only you could stop and learn from your lies. Even the counsellor was a lie. Pfft.

How will you ever be a good father? Guess you will go on to hurt others but thank goodness it won't be me. Three times you said you would pay me back and still nothing.

Slowly I'm letting go of all the hurt and have given up expecting you to stick to your word. A decent man would have paid me back by now. You are a fake who has to live with knowing that.