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polywog

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The sad thing, i want to talk to you all the time but know what, i wouldnt know what i really want to say so how about i just go with f*ck you very much.

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Man what a set back. I should be stoked, what with my promotion, the accepted offer on a house, and things going well. At least I know that it will pass. Was nice though still kind of sexy but not the same, hope all is well. It truly is old news and we all know it now.

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Hi Hun. So, so sorry you are hurting. It's gonna be okay. It's just gonna take time and I know that sucks. My roommate told me "give time, time." I have to work on that too.

 

Thank you soo much for this. You really don't know how much it means! I feel like the more I hear positive things like this, the more I'll start to believe it.

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Yesterday I felt I was finally over you for good, but today I miss you so much. I want to contact you, hear your voice, meet up with you, but I know it won't do any good so will stay NC. Can't figure out how I can go from feeling over you yesterday to missing you so bad today. The thing is I know all your days feel like my yesterday in regards to me. I guess part of me wishes they didn't.

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Okay, this is just utterly stupid, so stupid I had to share.

 

You dreamed about us playing chess. Weird. So weird I just had to google its possible meaning later when I was bored.

 

And of course, traditional interpretation of playing chess is: “To dream about playing chess […] may also demonstrate that you have run into your equal in either a business affair or in love

 

Seriously. I know it doesn't mean anything, but come on! Of all the things you could possibly dream of and tell me after. Now even the internet turns on me showing me this stuff. F u.

 

And by the way, I went to check out a possible meaning to my dream, too. That one with you, covered in bandages like a mummy, where I asked you if I could lay on you if it didn't hurt too much, and you said it was okay. “Dreaming of bandages, no matter how they are being utilized is a symbol of something we want to “fix” or “mend” in our life. Usually, this problem or situation is so large, and seems so hopeless, that we push it aside in our mind. It’s easier to ignore it than to try to come up with ways to mend it. Often times, the situation we want to fix is actually out of our hands and we realize it.”

 

Pretty accurate. But I already knew that all too well.

 

So, folks. At the end of the day, homemade dream interpretation sucks. Leave it to the pros, if you really want to, and when you have a very, very weird dream, forget about it. Dreams are just there to mess with our heads as soon as we stop doing it on our own.

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seriously, wtf.... this is total nonsense, I need to get past all this. I have entirely to much positive things going on to let this derail me!

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Hey Ler. I was giving my dogs a bone today, and I instantly had flashbacks of hugging you. You smell JUST like a beef dog bone. It's kinda freaked me out how similar it was, actually. Just thought I'd let you know. Maybe you should take a shower and wash your clothes, yeah? Just in case your new girlfriend isn't as tolerant to the foul odors you emit as I was. Goodnight! Mwah! Sweet dreams! ***hole..

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~Days like this I want to drive away

Pack my bags and watch your shadow fade away

‘Cause you chewed me up and spit me out

Like I was POISON in your mouth

You took my light, you drained me down

But that was then and this is NOW

Now look at me.....

~This is the part of me

That you’re never gonna ever take away from me, no

Throw your sticks and your stones, throw your bombs and your BLOWS

But you’re not gonna break my soul

This is the part of me

That you’re never gonna ever take away from me, no

 

~I just wanna throw my phone away

Find out who is really there for me...

You ripped me off your love was cheap

Was always tearing at the seams

I fell deep and you let me down

But that was then and this NOW

~Now look at me I’m sparkling

A firework, a dancing flame

You’ll never put me out again

I’m glowin’ oh whoa

So you can keep the diamond ring

It don't mean nothing anyway

In fact you can keep everything yeah yeah

Except for ME!!!

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I was so close to contacting you an asking if you see a future with us. But deep down i already know the answer to that. I know what it is you want from me and it doesnt involve taking me out or doing anything in public. Im not prepared to lower myself to be your bit of fun. The thrill of seeing you after all this time would not compare with how used i would feel afterwards. go and find someone else if thats what you want.

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Thank you soo much for this. You really don't know how much it means! I feel like the more I hear positive things like this, the more I'll start to believe it.

 

Believe it!:) One day you will no longer be a sad little bee. You will be a happy little butterfly. Just let yourself heal and give yourself lots of hugs.

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What's up, you disgusting bombaclot?

 

It was such a nice day today. I'm so glad that I did not have to deal with your underarm odor or your elongated hemmorhoids. EEK, you are one nasty SOB.

 

F you, you sad sack of gorilla crap.

 

Remember, keep reading books on how to wash your filthy, disgusting body. Remember...soap...good, lies...bad.

 

Soap...good; lies...bad

 

Soap...good; lies...bad.

 

Got it? F you, you worthless piece of scum!

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Hello dummy,

 

It's me again. It's been 30 days since we have spoken...thank goodness I have arrived at the 30 day mark. I hope you have used this time constructively, such as getting yourself fixed and self-flogging. Your life is meaningless. You ruin everything you touch. You use every girlfriend you ever had. You are the most disgusting thing I have ever seen in my life. You're nasty, you stink, you don't use enough soap when you wash. I saw how little soap you use to clean your filthy, disgusting body. I could not believe it. Nasty on the outside, nasty on the inside. Only a dirty slut like you could appreciate filth the way you do. You are a dirty slut. You live like a dirty slut. You will die a dirty slut. You are just an insult to anything that is good and clean. You have poor cleanliness skills. You don't understand how to properly use soap. You are as dirty on the inside as you are on the outside. You like feeling your own hemorrhoids. You are disgusting.

 

Update: You're still nasty. Go and wash your filthy, raggedy buttocks.

Edited by CopingGal
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you have no idea how great it finally feels to be so close to being over you. All the thoughts of wanting to text you, wondering who you are with and whether you miss me are finally being replaced by thoughts of you being a lying, selfish, strange, compulsive lying fantisist. And you have put them thoughts in my head so thanks for that. You have done me a huge favour by just being yourself. Just wish Id have felt this way a long time ago.

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Darkesthour33

You left in November 2010, and even though I know everything now, about your boyfriend that you been seeing at work, now you guys are living together portraying the perfect couple, yea I heard about that,

 

I still love you with all of my heart, I thought we would be forever, I miss you so much, I'm getting better now though, I no longer shake in my sleep, I dont wake up in the middle of the night reaching for you as much, but my mind and heart is still with you, I know you dont love me me anymore, you made that quite clear, when you said you wanted to be friends,

 

I know you have built a new life with him, becuase of this I had to let facebook go, to see him holding you, and you smiling kills me inside,

 

I still hold a torch in my heart for you, and I know I have to let it go, but I still love you so much, your my first thought of the day and my last thought at night, I still love you, and I cant believe that you really dont want to see me or talk to me anymore, its one of the hardest things to except

 

things are going good in my life, but its hard to celebrate because we would always celebrate together, I think of you all the time, i know your not thinking of me, and that you call the females that I'm dating just to check on me, but I know you dont really care about me you do it because you probably think its funny

 

You were my everything, I know I will always love you, I dont even wish you any misfortune, but it hurts to know that you give him your smile, and kisses and affection, it kills me to know that you are held by him everynight, I know we cant be together, but I still love you, the 9 years we were married were some of the happier times in my life and I will cherish what we had, I know you dont feel the same, and thats why I know we cant be together, but know that I still love you the same as I did when we were 19, I just miss you so much, but you dont love me no more, the pain is indescribable, I hope you never have to go through this ever

 

I still love you

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Darkesthour33 I am so sorry for your pain. That is the most awful thing. I can not imagine myself being able to deal with being married for 9 years to someone I met in my youth and then having to accept that its over. My heart goes out to you. I really hope your life turns out to be better than you ever dreamed it would be without her.

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Darkesthour33
Darkesthour33 I am so sorry for your pain. That is the most awful thing. I can not imagine myself being able to deal with being married for 9 years to someone I met in my youth and then having to accept that its over. My heart goes out to you. I really hope your life turns out to be better than you ever dreamed it would be without her.

 

Thank you, its really nice to hear that,

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Man...just about a whole year now.

 

You burned me bad. I had trust issues before I met you, and you took them to a whole new high.

 

But I'm getting my courage back, to trust again. Day by day, little by little. And every victory I gain is a step toward freedom. Freedom from the past, from poring over what went wrong with you, why my trust and love wasn't enough for you.

 

I forgot that. And I forget how awesome I am. That's really what gets me down. I focus on the good times with you and the good things about you, and forget about all the great things about myself that you stopped appreciating. Tha's not my problem.

 

By this time tomorrow, I hope I'll have gone back to having forgotten all about you again.

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I've been away for 3 weeks to a tropical island. It has done me good. I thought about you. Sometimes. I didn't think like last year. It was less intense.

 

I guess I just miss having someone. And now after this long break and no contact, I can finally think clearly. I realize now more than ever that we were not meant to be together.

 

Well how could we have been ?

 

You didn't know what you wanted from me ? So what difference would it have made if I had stayed or not ? You don't know what you wanted back then. Now I understand perfectly. You're still soulsearching, trying to find out who you are, what you like, etc ...

 

I hope you'll find what you want.

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I am so dissapointed in myself. I have got to let things be.

 

I understand. I feel like a jackass for thinking about his lying ass even knowing he is not even caring about me. He could care less if I am taking pills to get over him or barely hanging on. The lovely thing is I am neither. My only fault lies in thinking of him. The why's and how did I miss how evil he really was? If I can help you any check this out: Madea Gives Relationship Advice – Break Your Shackles - BreakYourShackles

That video truly stopped my tears and foolish thoughts of love. I got over that the moment I watched this. Now my brain is simply stuck on how did i miss all those damn red flags. Am I color blind???????????????

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(OMG forum, I want to send this email SO bad!!! Somebody please stop me)

 

Hello,

 

The first week you were gone was really hard for me. But, I've grown a lot since then. I had a lot of alone time to think and reseach about marriage. It is what it is... I accept that you don't love me anymore. Im sorry for the things I said that hurt you. It was always in the heat of the moment and I always regretted saying them afterwords.

 

But, I need to move on with my life. I can't just sit around mope anymore. It's just not healthy for me or the kids to do that. We need set some boundries. I don't know what your doing every night, when you do call me your not providing any details about your evenings. So, maybe not, but I suspect your going out with your new friends sometimes, and just dont want me to worry. I know if i ask you, you will just get mad at me and say "NO" anyway. Just remember what I said "don't do anything that you wouldn't want me to do to you".

 

I know I'm a descent guy and a good catch. And someday you will remember everything about me that is good. I still love you and I hope we can make it thought this. I hope you can love me again someday...

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I want to contact her so bad right now!! I know it may sound strange but everyone complains about bread crumbs but I don't have any. With bread crumbs at least you know that you are still in their thoughts and that they still cared. It has been 4 weeks since the break up and she has only contacted me once just to thank me for sending back her belongings. How does she just walk away from this? Did I not mean anything to her? Its as if the whole relationship never existed and if it did.... it was nothing important because it was so easy to walk away.

I understand that I may not have been the perfect boyfriend but she wasn't perfect either. Everyone has their flaws.... I was willing to accept her for who she was so why wasn't she able to accept me? While she broke up with me she made me feel really bad about myself. Its as if I was the only one that contributed to the break up. I did not say a word and just sat there and listened. I love her so much... she was the one that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I even told her that just a few days before this all happened. Why does it have to be like this? I want to reach out and ask for answers but I'm afraid of the answers. I don't want to put myself through that type of pain. She won't be treating me the same way..... probably just really cold as if I didn't even matter to her. She has already moved on... maybe not with another person but at least from an emotional stand point. How come I am unable to do the same? How do people cope.... I see all these people on here that always seem so positive about their situation and I envy them on how strong they are. I wish I had only some of the strength these folks have.

I have been in NC for 4 weeks now.... trying to move on. But I can't really do much since I have a broken foot. All I can do is just lay in bed or the couch and let my mind wander. I guess it just hurts to know that someone you love so much no longer cares about you and is willing to wipe you out of their lives completely. Am I just tricking myself thinking that with No Contact she may miss me and come back? Is this the only reason why I am so commited to it? Please help.... I don't know what is going through my head. Its just all a big mess!!!

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I'm sorry your brain works the way it does. I'm sorry your so dysfunctional.

I'm sorry you look at relationships as merely a way to use women. I'm sorry you are a compulsive liar.

 

I can't imagine what it must be like to live life the way you do...to make so many people so angry at you.

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