Hestia Posted October 30, 2009 Share Posted October 30, 2009 So let me see if i got this straight. She texts you but I'm not allowed to do so. One word from her and you travel hundreds of miles so you can meet her. But you want to spend some time at my flat? Because the timing suits you? You are in need of some holidays? And have sex with me? Aww... You're revolting! You dont deserve my efforts. I'm sick of pretending I care about the supernatural stuff you come up with. I'm sick of you. You're just... a silly boy trying to get laid. Acting like a teenager who just found out about it. Oh my God, it's true isnt it? Pathetic. I'm so much better than you in every way, what am I doing putting myself down like this? You dont deserve me, you dont even try to. You're so full of yourself you cant see anyone else. For you I'm just a sad replacement of your girlfriend. We're not going anywhere, as I frequently understand. I dont want to forget it this time. You're no good for me and I'm wasting my time with this sad neverending game. This is not going anywhere. Whatever. Link to post Share on other sites
Mollyanna Posted October 30, 2009 Share Posted October 30, 2009 Dear J: I haven't heard from you in 2 days. I know you are upset about me texting and calling one day upset and angry and telling you off and then the next day wanting you to talk to me and "let's be friends". I don't know how to do this. What you did to me was sooooo low and yet I still have this desire to see you and be with you. I don't want to be your girlfriend or your wife, but I guess I want to go back to being the way we were before we let relationship talk get in the way. I sometimes think it will be OK to continue having sex with you too, just until I found someone else.. When you asked me over last weekend, were you just wanting sex also? Or did you miss me? Because you and I both know you could get some just about anywhere.. I guess I could too but I only want to be with you right now. I'm obsessed thinking about you and that scares me, and I can imagine my 20 texts/email days scare the hell out of my too. How many times have you called me psycho now? So why can't I just stop!?!? I guess I just want to feel better and I don't know how. I miss you and I am lonely. Link to post Share on other sites
Bulldozed Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 It was obvious to me, the day your friend came to visit you at the mall, when, for some ****ing reason you felt the need to share with me that one of the things you asked her was, "since you and Tom are separated, does that mean I can date him"....talk about one of the tackiest things I've ever heard said to a friend. Especially her, having just walked on a relatively new family. Did it ever dawn on you that maybe she was there to reach out to you, perhaps share her side, since you clearly only heard what he fed you? Afterall, no attorney, no going after the money she racked up on his credit card bills...what person with half a brain would allow her to get away with that, seriously? Clearly, there's more to the story...isn't there...or he's just a ****ing idiot! Question: did you ever actually find out what drove her away, considering all the money his parents ponied up to adopt their son? My GOD, what went wrong with you? seriously? WOW....clearly you don't value friends. She was yours for how long? Didn't you stand up in her wedding? Wasn't she the one we bought the Kid Rock shirt for at the Joe two winters ago? It certainly wasn't Tom....your good friend, was it?....imagine this conversation....Hey Tony, sorry to hear you and Jennifer split, because you met someone else....do you mind if I date her, since were good friends for nearly 14 yrs? HOLY ****....not even an option....why? I shouldn't have to tell you. No matter how dispicable my friends may one day be to their spouses, friendships endure, and I'll always value them. They've done and contributed more to me than their wives ever will, regardless of how cool, and hot they may be. It's ****ing TABOO for a thousand reasons. You are ****ing this chach....I know it....you stay there multiple times a week....why's it a ****ing secret? Seriously? Either shame or embarassment, or both....and rightfully so....remember this...when this rebound fling is over and Tom realizes what a truly depressing, un-motivated, intellectually bankrupt person you truly are, and that getting yourself pregnant is all consuming for you, he'll be gone, and you'll still be living with and inconviencing mommy and daddy....and working for scraps. Your future truly is bleak! So sad......That's a fact....it'll happen, maybe not this month, or 6 months from now....but trust me, he's 40, decent looking dude (albeit somewhat cheezy) and he'll find someone younger than you....and far more mentally stable. In the end, the world punishes stupid people....regretably, you continue NOT to be the exception. I'm so much of a better person than you...personal character is all we have Susan....and your's, unfortunately is clearly in the toilet. And yes....this note is hurtful, but considering your total lack of decency and class, and the way you ended a 16 yr friendship and cheated, rightfully deserved. You have your mother to thank for the way you've turned out....you may want to consider therapy....seriously! You may also want to lay off the miller lites, or is it Coors light now, since that's your new bf's drink of choice? Alcohol is a depressant, in case you didn't know that....it allows you to distance yourself from your emotions, unless of course your drunk and you just got laid....where after you'll tell the person, how much you "need" them...and are they going to take care of you...blahblahblah.....I never "needed" you.....i "wanted" you.....and yes, I would have taken care of you, more than you'll ever know. But the truth is, I used to ask you questions about us (when you were sober), and you'd look at me like a deer stuck in the headlights...Nothing....empty look..? very strange, I got to tell you....I've always dated college educated women...figured, what the hell, I'll try something different...you know what, during the first 8 months, when all the real "fluff" between us was in the full force, it was pretty damn good. Funny thing, "Fluff"....you always said there was no fluff with us, never did understand where you were coming from whenever you said that? As a guy who has been in a number of real relationships, I definitely know all relationships in the beginning are nothing but Fluff....you know, everythings new, fun and exciting. Of course its ****ing fluff. Once that fades away, then two people are now facing a real relationship, based on true and honest commication, committment and trust....that's the hard part. That's why successful relationships are hard work! Perhaps that's why all of your previous relationships all failed? Maybe marriage isn't meant for you? Maybe you should just bounce from guy to guy every 6-8 months or so at the apex of the "fluff" stage, then move on to the next one? This way you're able to experience perpetual "nirvana" all while living at your folks, rent free. As far as children go, you're 41, given your level of intellect and some of the genes running through your body, I wouldnt risk it....go rent a trailer and get a cat! Clearly you're not mentally equipped to handle a real relationship, not to mention the thought of you actually raising a child! An no...I don't ever want to or expect to ever hear from your pathetic ass again. Best of luck to you! Link to post Share on other sites
Mollyanna Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 i hate this.. I miss you so much. I miss how much fun we had and now it is gone. We were supposed to be moving in together and now I sit in the new apartment alone.. and wondering where you are. And where you will live now that your lease is up today also.. Why did you have to screw up so badly? You said you had more fun with me and told me more than ANYONE you had ever met. Then why aren't we together? Why did you have to keep going back to your ex?!? I was so happy and now I don't know how to get that feeling back. I don't want to be around anyone but you.. Link to post Share on other sites
sugahoney Posted October 31, 2009 Share Posted October 31, 2009 I am tired of feeling like this, I wish I didnt care about you. I need to find the strength to let you go and move on because you have obviously moved on and dont want or need me in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Limbo21 Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 (edited) Morning baby, hope you slept well. I popped a sleeping pill again but it doesn't stop the dreams early morning. was only a short while ago I'd wake with you kissing my back or Id open an eye and you'd be staring at me smiling. It's your bday soon and that'd make you 12 years younger than me!! A scary 28 years old! I miss our jokes, our compatiblity, our intimacy. I miss telling you how beautiful you looked ... That's because you are. I fancied you so much, physically, mentally & emotionally ... I was the person I always wanted to be when I was with you. I don't miss all the blokes staring at you though, that used me make me jealous, but also proud I'm going to church now, I don't believe a word of it but you wanted me too when we was together and I just took the piss ... Now i've lost you I just see it as a way to still be close to you. I've still got it bad ... I love you, always have always will. A girl I know is interested in me but I'm not interested in her. That's the problem I'm going to have ... You've set the bar to Olympic heights so even when I'm totally over you I'll not be able to get together with a normal woman shed have to be special ... Like you Edited November 1, 2009 by Limbo21 Link to post Share on other sites
HeavenOrHell Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 I have too many words, emotions, going round and round constantly. I want to see you all the time but I am trying to be strong now and not even text you, you've said you miss and need me, but friendship isn't enough for me, I can't go from 18 years of being partners to being just good friends. I am torn in two, I want to see you, but I can't because it's too painful, we're not even allowed to hug now. I want to be able to let go before you meet someone else, because I just can't BEAR the thought of it. I will never meet anyone I feel so deeply about, not being negative, but realistic. So you will move on and settle down with someone else, and I will be stuck in the past. I am the one who feels hurt now. Link to post Share on other sites
cheeze Posted November 1, 2009 Share Posted November 1, 2009 S, How could you tell me that you 'kissed her a couple of times'... Why do I have to hear all this from you. Dont you have a heart? Are you the same person I adored all these years. Link to post Share on other sites
DustySaltus Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 So last week was a rough week for me.....but you'll never know about it. My birthday on Monday...no call from you. Your birthday on Tuesday, no call from me. Our wedding was supposed to happen on Friday, instead my best friend gets engaged to his girl that day....... And you know what? I'm OK. I'm not GREAT, but i'm ok. I have women flocking to me left and right but all I ever wanted was you. I just wonder if all that sh*t you were talking to me was ever even really true. Oh well, I know mine was. Link to post Share on other sites
Dark_of_the_Moon Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 Last three days have been hard. This morning I SO want to contact him. Why, why, why....why did he do this? Why did I fall for him, Why did......oh well. No answers for me, I hate the thought that I am totally forgotten and was only a game to him. Annoying....never to have loved and when you finally do open yourself up, you get a dagger to your heart. Oh well. I should be handling this more gracefully...but I am not. Never understood so many things....hard lessons....hard to kill dreams. I would break something, but then I have to clean it up.....bummer. All right. Done, enough tears for this morning. Link to post Share on other sites
novack Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 You think that after waiting all summer, you can just go through a week of partying and ditch me. You made me feel special and made me the happiest i have ever been. On the other hand, at OAP, what you did was awful, how could someone you treat any human being like that esp. one you loved for 20 months. Your life may be great right now, i have it all but dont want. Soon the tables will shift, and one day i will look back at what we had smile but be thankful its over. You restricted me and yourself eventually bringing us down. I have learned alot about relationships and i wont make the same mistakes again. Your coldness when we ended it showed me that we could never be compatible, i the human and you the dancer Link to post Share on other sites
almostpassedit Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 I thought I saw you yesterday in the city. Not sure if it was you or not, whomever that female was, it looked like she had an attitude with me, I just seen her reaction and kept walking. I didn't look back but at the same time, I thought it could of been you, I didn't see the face. Haven't seen you in almost 2 years. I guess thats the way life works. Soon I'll find someone, someone to make me forget all about you. Link to post Share on other sites
sugahoney Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 Well its finally over it hurts so much right now I dont know how I will function tomorrow at work. Today was hard enough. So in a month you and her will be moving in together. i dont know how you expect me to remain friends with you knowing how i feel. If you cared anything for me you wouldnt push this but I guess after 2 years of putting up with crap you realisse you can do anything and i will still be there. That is not going to happen this time. I am not good enough to be your girlfriend but you think it is ok to use me under the guise of being my friend? I would do anything to be back with you but you choose her, the one that you argue with so much but I am too emtional to deal with. I cant do it any more, I cant sit around and watch you be with her, I know you will realise what a mistake you have made and by then I will no longer there for you it will be too late. I give you 6 months before you realise that you made a big mistake going back to someone because you know what to expect with them and things with me are too uncertain. Have fun arguing and being miserable, I will try my hardest to get over you and I will savor the moment you come crawling back to me but by then I will have moved on. Link to post Share on other sites
lilbelle Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 You could have been a man. You could have let me go. You didn't have to come back to do it again. I loved you unconditionailly. I can't believe how disrespectful you became. You lied to me and said you were done with her. I'm heartbroke, shattered, fragile and you took advantage of that. We were golden together and yet you can't just listen long enough to realize that this is real. I can't keep up with it. I'm sorry and I love you. Link to post Share on other sites
onewillburn Posted November 2, 2009 Share Posted November 2, 2009 In the end, you lied about everything. You turned out to be more selfish than I had previously thought. All you can do is blame, but that's what weak people do. At least I can admit my faults and work towards a better life. You bask in your misfortunes, hoping somebody will take pity and shower you with the validation you're always so hungry for. But I know you'll get bored again. You can't erase two years. You can't pretend forever. But I won't be there for you ever again. You were such a coward and left me cold and dry on my own. Your confidence is on such stilted legs, I could break you in two breaths. You egotistical, pathetic problem child. I have no respect for you and not a hint of love left. You ruined something that could have been incredible. You haunted everything with your melodramatic bull****. I am ashamed for ever putting up with it. Link to post Share on other sites
McGrupp Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 **** i miss you so much. i know someone doesnt come back once you call them a bitch twice. i dont know what to think anymore. all i know is i have to move on. i want the final thing i ever send you to be this poem i wrote you in college. its corny as hell. and i know its not going to do anything. i miss you so much i cant handle it. She sews the pocket strong, With wrists and curves Graceful like the pearls, Around her expression Our lips trying, To leave this discussion Her dress, A world of desires At the crest of her neck I kiss I ponder, If she will get prettier, As we get older And sigh Beauty like that would not evaporate To last a lifetime with this in my grasp Will be the greatest of all fates Lie and awake each morning Take in all the wind To breathe sweet, And have sweetness due i want you so bad. and i cant have you emotionally i am still a wreck. i know you dont care. what am i supposed to do? Link to post Share on other sites
Northwesthunny Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 i miss you Link to post Share on other sites
sugahoney Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 How can you act like everything is ok and that you are concerned about me. You have basically told me that who I am is not good enough for you and you want me to talk to you and pretend that everything is ok with us. I cannot do this, I can't pretend that this doesn't hurt and that I am ok with this. I just want to stop feeling like the bottom dropped out of my world and like I have lost my best friend. We will never be friends so I don't know why you won't stop trying. I will give myself 1 month to get over this and move on. You don't deserve anymore of my time. Link to post Share on other sites
Limbo21 Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 Hiya baby, as you have probably guessed I've not going to read your texts, emails or answer the phone to you. Why do you keep contacting me? What's changed? Your being for want of a better word ... Cruel you know I love you but I'm guessing you've always thought you can snap your fingers and I'd be there? I'm not strong enough to have further heartbreak. I love you. I just don't know what you want from me? All my love Richard x x x Link to post Share on other sites
Ultiman Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 Hey i miss you so much and just wanted to see how you were doing. Honestly i want to beat the ****ing living ****t out of that mother ****err u keep hooking up with but i cant let u know the truth or else you will think i am weak. I am not weak i just truly did love you. I loved your honesty, your morality, your determination, your strength and o god that ass was so nice to ****k. Anyways im just rambling to release some stress so i wont really call u and make a fool of myself. Have a great day Link to post Share on other sites
lostmirthfulness Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 f*** you, honesty was my policy, not yours. Link to post Share on other sites
ChameleonLvr Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 (edited) I'm deeply saddened by the fact that you don't even realize that you are your own worst enemy. You have a serious issue regarding your need to control. I'm not sure where that came from but it is ruining your chances at having the true loving and trusting relationship that you seek. It was your need to control that drove your family away. It was your need to control me, my thoughts, my feelings, my actions that kept me from truly believing in you. I'm sure that your motivation or intentions were good but you don't realize the damage you do by not allowing those that you love live their dreams, be themselves, express themselves, by correcting them, and by "educating" them on how they should be. You ultimately drive everyone away from you. Do you realize that you controlled everything about our relationship? When, where, what and how. But you could not control me completely. I will not be controlled by anyone (not even you). I hope and pray that you figure this out for yourself. Although it's too late for us, I hope that your dream of love and true partnership come true. Edited November 3, 2009 by ChameleonLvr revisited Link to post Share on other sites
Canuck81 Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 I feel I'm a much better person now. I feel a sharpness and and awareness I haven't felt in years. It sucks that it took you leaving me to find that in myself. I would have found this in me had you given me the chance. I would have loved to have been able to see you with my new eyes, I feel I have so much love to give you. Now I'll meet someone new and share my heart with her. I want it to be you, but you didn't think I was capable of being a better man and left me before I had the chance to show you. I hope you make your new love last, you had better make it worth breaking my heart to get your chance with him. Link to post Share on other sites
lilbelle Posted November 3, 2009 Share Posted November 3, 2009 I realized today that I was selfish, impatient, unappreciative of your own time. I know you felt for me, and maybe I didn't have your heart but you had mine. You didn't need to crush it. You could have just been honest. You shouldn't have come back to me. I was over it, I was moving on. Now I'm in a place that I can't climb out of. I will not let you make me hate you. I will love you regardless of your immaturity and lies. Link to post Share on other sites
sugahoney Posted November 4, 2009 Share Posted November 4, 2009 what is wrong with me, when you told me that she collapsed the first thing that went through my head was oh maybe she will die. What kind of person thinks that. I wish I didnt care about them and their relationship Link to post Share on other sites
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