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SimonSerenade

Dear Samantha

 

Today has been hell without you, Half of me is grateful for the presents and the other half really wishes you hadn't, It's been a hard time and I don't think it'll be over for a long time, We still feel so damn unfinished, Thinking of you with others kills me so many times over but thats life now whatever you decide to do.

 

I love you so so ****ing much, Hearing your voice tonight brought it all back, Geuss I'll always be holding up a light for you in my heart, Nobody will ever compare to you and that's just how it is so I'm just not going to bother anymore in truth, I only want you and I'd hope the same would apply to me though I know you'd never ever admit it, I geuss now there's nothing more to do than go back to no contact, I just wish I knew what all this meant but I geuss I never will cause you'll never tell me.

 

I love you Sam... always remember that.

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I really wasn't expecting anything yesterday. But I was hoping. It's been a long and hard process, and maybe I just wanted some validation that it's been long and hard for you too. But I also know you, that you'll move on quickly. I have to try and do the same too. One more day forward. One more day stronger.

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This Holiday season has been tough. Having to remember the first one with you two years ago and the next year. Having to remember the time we drove around looking at the Christmas lights, seeing the house where we once lived, remembering the love that I had for you. Remembering the wonderful man I had first met. I know now that you are not that man, but you were and you were special to me. I've had all this time off and sometimes wish we were still spending time together. We always had a good time. You definitely bugged me, you could be controlling. Mostly I miss you, but I know I can't tell you because I will be hurt if I do. I want to do things different than I have in the past although it is very difficult not to call you and beg and plead, but I also know that you are not worth that. It is tough I don't know how or when I will get through this.

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still can belive you are married and not mine anymore. still cant stop thinking about all i didnt do and could have done to save us. sorry i hurt you. wish you didnt hurt me. this whole thing is so messed up and such a tragedy. at least for me. i am so profoundly sad and miss my best friend. i hope someday you will have more mercy on me

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I hope you had a lovely birthday and xmas, I did not contact you as I have done alot of begging in the past for you to talk to me. I will not anymore. You could have also contacted me, if I was worth it for you.

Did I cross your mind at all? Do you remember what we always did for xmas?

It was heartbreaking, but guess what I have a nephew now! He is absolutely gorgeous, my bro and wife are so so happy. It was bittersweet for me, I kept having to force myself not to call you, kept reminding myself that you knew about this.

Don't know what I expected, you really did not want to be part of my life any more. Hope your CBR is keeping you happy or whatever you ride now, no actually, I hope you are miserable and regret this.

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make me feel better

i'm still thinking about you. why didn't i realize you were so perfect before? why didn't i love you more and make the most of the time i was with you? now i look back everything is so much clearer now. i didn't realize how important you were to me, how beautiful you are, how much we had in common, how happy i was to do everything with you. i miss you so much. i hate how u don't even give a damn to even respond to me, like you are trying to forget i ever existed. do you know how hard it will be to forget my eight years with you? i'm still thinking about you each and every single day. i miss you and just wish you'd come back to me one day. you hope you miss me too and its tearing at your heart and you want to get back with me.

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dear j i could mirror the letter the last poster wrote about making them feel better. only we were together 10 eyars and you are now married.

 

but you ignore my heartfelt letters... my heart. period

 

i still pray for peace everyday

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SimonSerenade

Dear Samantha

 

I think I've near enough gotten my strength back now, Can't be too sure though till new year has been and gone, You pretty much killed me over Christmas buying me those presents though it was a kindness on your part, It just killed me and seemed pointless as did me buying gifts for you, Won't be doing that in the future thats for sure and hopefully you won't either.

 

When I think of all I lost in this, My heart breaks all over again, It truly does, We had a family together and you walked away from that time and time again only this time you walked for good and no amount of words from the heart or actions of loving kindness could bring you back to me so what else am I to do now but move on completely and forget about you completely.

 

You will always mean something to me, We had our first child together, I was your first time and your first love and it kills me now to imagine you with others, I remember some guy coming back from the direction of your house and wondering if there was anything going on but despite all of this I know you and your not one to sleep with somebody your not with and don't love and if anything, I can at least take comfort out of that.

 

I geuss now I have to realise that your not the girl I fell in love with anymore, The girl I loved would of never left or thought she could find better elsewhere, Maybe you are going through G.I.G.S or maybe I just messed up so bad you can never see me the same again but either way you changed way before any of that and treated me badly and selfishly moved out on me with our son.

 

I truly believe one day we'll sit down and talk about all of this, I feel you at least owe me that, All I got when you left was a phone call and never got to say goodbye to your face, Got no kind words or feelings on your part, No reassurance that you weren't going to go out and do something stupid.

 

What scares me the most now is never finding what I had with you again and never leading the family life I could have had with you, That messes with my head more than you could ever possibly know, What scares me the most is the chance you may one day come back and want me back after being with somebody else and after that I won't be the only person you've ever slept with anymore or the only person you've ever loved, That meant alot to me, It was special beyond all belief to me, Lets hope it's the same for you.

 

I geuss if that happened then I couldn't take you back and after all the damage you've done and all the pain you've caused, I don't know how I can ever trust you again or forgive you for how you acted and left things, I don't think about these things a lot and after the things you've said and done so carelessly, How you've watched me fall apart and beg and cry and just laugh in my face, I can't take you back, I deserve so much more than that.

 

I could never of left you or seen you in that state, I'd of always stuck around to work at it and comfort you should anything be on your mind or tearing at your heart, I'd of held you through it all and caught every tear, How you can sleep at night not seeing me infront of you with arms wide open I don't know but now's the time for me to do the same and get back out there and get better for myself, I won't take you back after this, Like the old as time saying goes, Fool me once shame on me, Fool me twice shame on you but fool me any more than that then your never coming back, You ran the risk of never having a thing to do with me again once you let me go and now that I realise you don't deserve a thing from me then that's what you'll get, Absolutely nothing so sorry but your risk didn't pay off for you this time.

 

What breaks my heart the most beyond all else is how your going to justify this person you are now to our son, How your going to explain to him how you left his father at every opportunity you got, How you moved out on him the moment he was born, How you denied him the chance of living that all great and mighty family life style because you simply couldn't be bothered opening up and talking things out or making a single effort to change your selfish heartless attitude towards him, How you just couldn't bare to cut the breast milk and move out of your mothers house when you promised you would.

 

I won't have this guilt because I did everything I could and let you in on how my heart was feeling, I stayed loyal and true to my feelings and never left when most would of just bolted straight away, I was the best you'll ever have and I know in my heart that nobody will compare and show you the compassion and love that I did, Your not mine anymore and I accept that now, You won't have me ever again should your mind change in the future, Nothing would change and things would never feel the same after the abandonment and lack of heart you've shown me plus if you ever did have sex again then you'd of killed it off all together so hope you can live with that.

 

In the end I'll always love you so I'll give you that one but from now on I'm doing things for myself and I'm going to do my damn best to keep you out of my head and out of my heart, Somebody out there deserves a great guy and I pretty much fit the bill, If anything I've learned out of this is how good of a heart I really have beating away in my chest.

 

I'm one in a million and my darling I've now realised that your just a dime a dozen, Make sure you never forget that. :)

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I'm really curious, when did this become 100% about YOU, not our son and certainly not me? You're the coldest, most selfish person I've ever had the misfortune of meeting.

Edited by marqueemoon4
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I've been doing some reflecting and you really did put me through a lot of ****. Do you realize and feel bad? Not sure. You don't really show it because your so damn good at hiding your feelings. I was looking back and I thought about the day we broke up. You got angry at me because I DIDN'T EAT YOUR ****ING EXPIRED CAKE and I got mad at you because you constantly ignored me after telling me you would change. You never took interest when I spoke to you, you never looked me in the eyes and you always cut me mid-sentences to talk to someone else. When you spoke to someone else, you looked ENGAGED and INTERESTED and with me, you looked BORED like you didn't care for me. Anyways Meg, the reason I didn't eat your cake was because WE WERE WORKING THAT DAY. I didn't want to eat at that time, I wanted to save it at the end of the night and share it with everyone. Wouldn't that been nice considering it was our last day of working? I hope you feel completely stupid and realized how big of a bitch you are. You told me that the icing was expired, so wouldn't you be happy that I DIDN'T eat the cake? Or were you trying to poison me on purpose? After all of that, what did you end up doing? You suggested we take a BREAK Seriously? A break? We're not Ross and Rachel. This isn't FRIENDS. How does a break fix things? The problem would not be resolved that way. You always hid your problems away from me and were afraid to tell me how you felt. That's why I was pissed and ignored you all night. I didn't want to fake it in front of everyone. That night, you spoke to all my friends and texted on your phone, planning on your way to dump me. You called me ON THE PHONE, dumped me, and my life changed forever. The next day all you told me was "you'll find someone better","everything happens for a reason", "I won't date until college because I want to focus on school" all the TYPICAL dumper bull****. Fast forward to today. You had 5 flings over the summer, one only 3 WEEKS after our break up and now you have a new boyfriend after you told many that "HS relationships are immature and pointless" and "I'm not girlfriend material right now". Your actions don't fit your words. You're a liar and I can't believe the new you now. You're no longer that 80s loving, shoe lace adoring, painter that I once knew. In my eyes you're a piece of trash that has no sense of empathy and will one day crash and burn. I hope you get your heart broken in the worst kind of way so you can finally know how I feel and how your other bfs feel went you break their hearts.

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The posts in here are freaking hilarious!

 

The things people say and how they say them are CLASSIC!

 

Some of the best put downs of all time!

 

I agree... with the poster above... You should have eaten the cake!

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The posts in here are freaking hilarious!

 

The things people say and how they say them are CLASSIC!

 

Some of the best put downs of all time!

 

I agree... with the poster above... You should have eaten the cake!

 

you should've eaten the cake

 

If I did, maybe she wouldn't have dumped me because I would've gone home sick :p

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If I did, maybe she wouldn't have dumped me because I would've gone home sick :p

 

You have a GREAT SENSE of HUMOR!

 

Sounds like your EX is an idiot!

 

Breaking up all due to a cake?!?!?! This has to take the cake as far as the dumbest reason why a couple broke up!

 

Hahahahahahaha!

Edited by homebrew
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Dear Maude,

 

you act in a manner that I never understood until I read about the GIGS, I miss you (particuarly your body) a lot today. I'm really grateful I could enjoy the company of such a young and attractive girl like you. I don't know how you did it to make me fall for you after 6 months of FWB, even after I rejected your love at the begining. Being dumped showed me how insane a brain can become, by thinking obssesivly about you and even by thinking that you are not so dumb after all (we both know you are). I realized you could fall in love with someone you would never date, god did I learned about me in the last 3 weeks. Thank you

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Alex,

 

I should have noticed the red flag when you stopped attempting to communicate with me soon after I moved to Tennessee, due to work and not sleeping enough, but always found enough time to comment on your female friend's Facebook pages and say hello to them, but you couldn't find any time to call or text "I love you" to me for an entire month.

 

You told me you were in this for the long run. I remember when I was in my car, sniffling and crying because the next week I would have to move out for my 9-month internship. You looked me straight in the eye and said "we'll be ok", and smiled at me with that smile that captured my heart.

 

I lost my boyfriend and my best friend when you called me at midnight to break up with me over, in my opinion, reasons that did not seem as grounds to break up. My heart is shattered, even though you promised not to hurt me. Apparently you were only telling me what I wanted to hear.

 

I miss holding your hand, remember when you commented on how both my hands fit perfectly in both of your huge palms? I miss your smile and I miss your laugh and your warm eyes. I miss your big arms around me. I miss how excited you'd get when you saw a souped up car drive past, and the way you'd explain to me the intricate workings of car engines. Your passion for automotives made me passionate in my artistry.

 

It's nice that you've completely cut me out of your life, when we were once such an important part of each other's lives, and it's nice that you continue to talk to your female friends on facebook with such happiness and nonchalantness, while I'm drowning here in a pool of disbelief.

 

I love you

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oh, i shouldnt have text you today about our son. Logic and common sense means nothing to someone who cares only for themselves. You continue to hurt our child because you are too much of a coward to face YOUR issues. You make me f*cking sick.

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You have a GREAT SENSE of HUMOR!

 

Sounds like your EX is an idiot!

 

Breaking up all due to a cake?!?!?! This has to take the cake as far as the dumbest reason why a couple broke up!

 

Hahahahahahaha!

 

Thanks? haha

 

Well that wasn't the big reason why she did. It just set her over the edge. She saved all her complaints about our relationships when we had arguements, so when I didn't eat the cake, she just unleashed everything on me.

 

What makes me laugh is, she told me it was expired the day after she dumped me.

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So she was trying to KILL you then! Glad that you got out while you are still alive!

 

JK - Sorry about your loss man... It sucks no matter how you slice it!

 

Hahahahahahaha!

 

Sorry, I can't help myself!

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What the h*ll happened? I had NO intention of contacting you. I deleted you as a contact in my cell yet it still rang you today while in my pocket. It scrolled all the way back to Dec. 7th, the last time I dialed your number. God, how I was mortified and confused! How I was floored! What was that? Divine intervention? It's mind boggling given all the numbers I've called since us last speaking. Yet it called you. Plus, it takes multiple steps to call a number that old. I don't know what to think.

 

What impression were you left with after our text exchange that followed? I was friendlier than I should have been. I let you know I'd been in town but didn't contact you. Can't tell if you cared. Ah well, back to NC.

 

I don't know what purpose the Universe had for dialing your number but I'm going to trust it was for my well-being, and perhaps for yours as well.

Edited by cerridwen
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SimonSerenade

I miss you and what I'll miss most is the family we could of had, What will be the hardest to see is somebody else raising our child now when all along it should of been me, I felt I deserved it but I didn't deserve any of what you've done to me, I love you to death but it's time now to let go and let somebody else in who can do the same.

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soleharmony1123

I'm beyond p**ed at you! You call, you text, you text, you call. Set me free & stop trying to string me along. Let me go! Beyonce, help me out:

 

Irreplaceable

 

"...So since I'm not your everything

How about I'll be nothing, nothing at all to you

Baby I won't shed a tear for you, I won't lose a wink of sleep

'Cause the truth of the matter is replacing you is so easy!

 

To the left, to the left..."

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Why am I thinking about you? It's been 1.5 years since we broke up, 1 year since any contact.

why do I think or wonder about you every day?

Is it because I'm single?

I know we'd never work, in my heart and soul I know you're gay. You are an abusive man..I would never go back to you..but we had a connection. We had FUN together. I haven't found that FUN factor since you. I haven't really been searching for it though. I haven't been dating at all since you really. Guess I need to, huh. I think I'll be ready 6 months from now..and then we'll see where I am. A part of me wishes you would unblock me on fb and write me. I mean..you loved me enough to propose to me. But then you block me and never talk to me again? Just weird to me.

Oh well. I'm single and think of things too much.

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