allie_lgh Posted May 4, 2011 Share Posted May 4, 2011 I can see you're happier without me. Even when you say you're miserable I know you're not. If you were you'd want to work things out. I wanted to work things out. So here is my list of F**k You's- my last gift from the heart... F**k You for breaking my heart, our vows and our plans F**k You for ever using my body as your personal playground F**k You for making me feel like the bad guy when you're the one who gave up and walked away F**k You for ever being so special to me that I'd rearrange the stars. because I did, and now I can't seem to find where I put them F**k You for being the only person who ever got me F**k You for not really getting me after all F**k You for telling me you will still love me forever and finally F**k You for not meaning that in the slightest Hell has a special place for people like you, I hope your bones melt and the emptiness where you soul would reside caves in on itself to show there was never anything to fill it. Link to post Share on other sites
Blueberry7691 Posted May 4, 2011 Share Posted May 4, 2011 So here is my list of F**k You's- my last gift from the heart... F**k You for breaking my heart, our vows and our plans F**k You for ever using my body as your personal playground F**k You for making me feel like the bad guy when you're the one who gave up and walked away F**k You for ever being so special to me that I'd rearrange the stars. because I did, and now I can't seem to find where I put them F**k You for being the only person who ever got me F**k You for not really getting me after all F**k You for telling me you will still love me forever and finally F**k You for not meaning that in the slightest I'd like to borrow all those words... I feel the same. Link to post Share on other sites
marqueemoon4 Posted May 4, 2011 Share Posted May 4, 2011 you're the cruelest, most ruthless, inconsiderate, manipulative, dishonest, disgusting, and worst excuse for a human being I've ever met. I wouldn't care except you're the mother of my son. f you Link to post Share on other sites
robkris8079 Posted May 4, 2011 Share Posted May 4, 2011 You have been getting so annoyed with me lately for no reasons at all. Over the smallest most trivial things. You know how I feel about you and what my plans, actually our plans for the future were. Now you tell me that " you don't know what you need honestly!! Your on then your off your up then your down!! You don't know what you want or where your goin!!". I can not be with someone who isn't in the relationship like I am. I can not be with someone who is uncertain if they want to be with me. It is not fair to me. It's also you not being fair to yourself. You know exactly how I feel. I've shown it over the years more then I have even said it. I want someone who can do that for me. I wanted that someone to be you but it's obvious it is not. When you figure out what you need, when your on, when your off, which way is up, which way is down, what you want and where your going feel free to contact me then if any of that includes me. But most likely by then I will not include you. Link to post Share on other sites
TragicAlliance Posted May 4, 2011 Share Posted May 4, 2011 It seems that you don't like what I have to say. Well, that's too bad, honey... you didn't care to hear me before, so why should I care if you're upset now? Sometimes the TRUTH hurts - DEAL WITH IT. Again, you called me a know-it-all. I think coming from you, that's a compliment. At least I don't have my head shoved up my ass, playing ignorant. I'd rather "know everything" than know nothing. You tell me that you don't believe you took advantage of me. Well, of course you don't believe it... why would I ever expect you to take responsibility for yourself? Just like you always did with me, you make EXCUSES for yourself. It's always something with you. "I'm tired." "I'm busy with work." Blah, blah, blah. Go feed your crap to someone who will eat it; I've had more than enough. I finally told you to leave me alone today. And HOW DARE YOU tell me, after I tell you to leave me alone, "Well, I'm going to talk to you later." Um, no. You aren't. You don't dictate what I do or who I talk to, so do me a favor and shove off. Go whine and cry and offer up your excuses to another gullible moron who will listen. You made this bed, now you have to lie in it. And I sure as hell am not going to be the one lying with you anymore. Sorry that my opinions make you so upset. No wait. I'm NOT sorry. I'm not sorry at all. Suck it up and get a grip, sweetheart. You need one, badly. Link to post Share on other sites
RetroFan00 Posted May 4, 2011 Share Posted May 4, 2011 Yeah, you're turning out to be what you despise....a coward! You said you'd never hurt me and that you loved me. Why are you avoiding me? You haven't unfriended me on Facebook yet but I know you will. If I continue to carry on this way, I'll have a nervous breakdown. And I know YOU aren't sitting there feel like I'm feeling. It's okay though. I hope you can cope with the fact that acting as you are won't get you anywhere. Did you not learn from the constant conflict that you have with the mother of your son? I just can't deal with this. And you aren't making it any better by NOT telling me how you feel directly. Link to post Share on other sites
chloe56 Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 I wish I could talk to you and ask for advice on my current issues. Miss your clear cut analysis and solutions to problems. I am missing you alot lately, thought I had moved on somewhat. I wish that you would write sometimes, other times I am glad there is NC. I have promised myself that the next time I am asked out, I will say yes. Time to leave the past in the past. Link to post Share on other sites
robkris8079 Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 Hey what time are we meeting at the restaurant tonight? Can't wait for some margarita's on this Cinco de mayo! Wish I can say that like this never happened . We had been planning to go out this night for awhile now. Ha I gotta find other plans tonight or I will go nuts . Link to post Share on other sites
TragicAlliance Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 (edited) First day after the proverbial end of the world... and here I am, waking up alone. Then again, I usually woke up alone anyway, so I can't judge how I feel about everything based on my present "Oh, I'm alone. Oh well, what do I want to do today?" feelings. How did YOU feel when you woke up this morning, honey? Or did you beat yourself down until you went emotionally numb - you beat yourself down just like you used to do me. That's lousy. Hope you get over that one day. Again I find myself saying "thank you" to you. What for today? For not chasing. Half of me thought you'd go crazy stalkerish and spam me with messages galore on any and every IM program we share, send me a mass of emails, and then text my phone until it exploded in flames. But that would've taken a major bit of effort from you, and you probably had something better to do. Still though - thank you. By keeping your distance, I can keep mine - and I'll be feeling better soon. I told you at the beginning of the relationship that I grieve and move on relatively quickly - 2 weeks. I figure yesterday was the official start of that period. I warned you what this would entail - I don't stalk, I don't reach out... I don't move backwards, I go forward. Haven't taken the smallest peek at your Facebook... don't have the temptation there. I know what's there... and it's nothing that would do anything but hurt me. Remember when I told you the analogy "When something burns you, you learn to be cautious or stay away altogether?" You burned me, honey. And now I know better. I guess that my taking care of myself and standing up for myself makes me "mean," "cold," and "she doesn't love me anymore." You're wrong... but you're not allowed to know how I feel about you anymore. I tried to make it your business - you had other things to do. So don't try to make it your business now - you're lying to us both, pretending it matters now. It's definitely lousy that the last memory we'll ever have of each other was that damn confrontation. Someone I've known for 5 years... nearly 3 of those being with me giving EVERYTHING I had... and my last memory of him was "Well if you don't like it, you don't have to bother." Gotta admit, though - you were right. I DON'T have to bother. And so I shan't. Still, wish I could've had a better "last day" with you. But I won't dwell on what I can't fix or change. Never again. Have a good life, honey. I just seriously hope you don't treat the next one as cruddy as you treated me... though that may never happen - I seriously doubt you'll ever find another girl as patient and tolerant as I was. You had patience, you had tolerance, you had someone always in your corner, you had someone who was willing to take a bullet for you... yet it wasn't good enough for you. But in the end, that's your loss to deal with. I guess I'll sum it up in a lyric, like I've done before, today from my favorite band: "I'm sorry for the demon I've become. You should be sorry for the angel you are not. I apologize for the cruel things that I did, but I don't regret one single word I said." Edited May 5, 2011 by TragicAlliance Link to post Share on other sites
allie_lgh Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 I'd like to borrow all those words... I feel the same. Feel free to help yourself! At least you know you're not alone in your feelings Link to post Share on other sites
allie_lgh Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 Perfect statement. I can't find mine either. I can't even manage my own words. Maybe it is because he is such a sad cliché that everyone else's will do just fine. When did I get so boring? you're not boring. Well I don't know you, maybe you are just kidding! I felt so lost when this all first happened. I felt boring and dull, like someone took the vibrant person I used to be and put me in the wash with bleach. I still feel that way a lot of the time. You'll find your words. And when you do you won't be able to do anything except scream them as loud as you can. AND IT WILL FEEL AMAZING!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
The Great Gazoo Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 I miss you. I have to move on. I miss you. I have to move on. I miss you. I have to move on, why am I trying to get you back ? Money? Love? Friendship? Normalcy? What wasted energy I could be spending on rebuilding myself and the kids. But... I so need you home.... with me. So empty without you here, so damn empty. So echoey and dead. You were the life in this house. The life in the deepest warmest place of my heart. So cold. Now its empty, icy, dead. Link to post Share on other sites
robkris8079 Posted May 5, 2011 Share Posted May 5, 2011 forget what I said. Let's just go back to the relationship we had where you got annoyed at me for absolutely no reason and you question in your head if you want to have a future with me. Link to post Share on other sites
PelicanPete Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 It's so hard now to remember any moments where I felt happy with you. It's been 5 months since you left me but I have changed so much since then. I look back at the time we shared together and it's almost like I wasn't the person that spent those years of my life with you. I picture the smile you use to give me that would always make me feel so special, and I reflect back on the moment you looked in my eyes and first told me that you loved me, but I feel nothing from those memories now. It feels like the whole thing was just a dream. I remember always thinking and telling you that you were the most beautiful girl I ever saw. I always felt so privileged holding your hand and getting close enough to you to smell the perfume you wore just for me. You always denied it when I told you how amazing you were, and now I finally understand why. It seems the only truth to your words was when you would tell me that I was the reason you were so beautiful. I don't hold any negativity towards you. Despite the heartless things you said to me, cheating and leaving me for another "man", and harassing my emotions even after we broke up, I feel sorry for you. The difference between you and I is that I am not a coward. I was able to face all of the pain and suffering you inflicted on me and become a much more powerful person. Even with all of the changes I've heard you made in your life, you cannot run from yourself. You've never been one to face your problems. You blamed the whole relationship on me, you broke up with me only when you had someone else, and now I hear you are married and living on the other side of the country. Even though you abandoned your old life and responsibilities, none of that will permanently silence your insecurity. No matter how many positive things happen to you, you will never truly be happy until you find the courage to face and accept who you are. I never thought the person I wanted to spend my life with at one point would turn into an example of a person I would not want to become. I fell inlove with that mask you wore around me, and I'm sure your new husband has as well. I know I made mistakes in our relationship, but I now know what to look for. You only know what to hide from. I will come across a genuine woman one day, I know for sure it will never be you. Some people stay children their whole lives, and I'm beginning to think you will be one of them. Your impression on my life is beginning to fade just as my emotions towards you have, and soon you will just be a morsel what once was. We all make mistakes and I hope some day soon you are brave enough to learn from yours. Link to post Share on other sites
Blueberry7691 Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 J- Timing IS everything. Too Late! Link to post Share on other sites
Ghosst Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 It's so hard now to remember any moments where I felt happy with you. It's been 5 months since you left me but I have changed so much since then. I look back at the time we shared together and it's almost like I wasn't the person that spent those years of my life with you. I picture the smile you use to give me that would always make me feel so special, and I reflect back on the moment you looked in my eyes and first told me that you loved me, but I feel nothing from those memories now. It feels like the whole thing was just a dream. I remember always thinking and telling you that you were the most beautiful girl I ever saw. I always felt so privileged holding your hand and getting close enough to you to smell the perfume you wore just for me. You always denied it when I told you how amazing you were, and now I finally understand why. It seems the only truth to your words was when you would tell me that I was the reason you were so beautiful. I don't hold any negativity towards you. Despite the heartless things you said to me, cheating and leaving me for another "man", and harassing my emotions even after we broke up, I feel sorry for you. The difference between you and I is that I am not a coward. I was able to face all of the pain and suffering you inflicted on me and become a much more powerful person. Even with all of the changes I've heard you made in your life, you cannot run from yourself. You've never been one to face your problems. You blamed the whole relationship on me, you broke up with me only when you had someone else, and now I hear you are married and living on the other side of the country. Even though you abandoned your old life and responsibilities, none of that will permanently silence your insecurity. No matter how many positive things happen to you, you will never truly be happy until you find the courage to face and accept who you are. I never thought the person I wanted to spend my life with at one point would turn into an example of a person I would not want to become. I fell inlove with that mask you wore around me, and I'm sure your new husband has as well. I know I made mistakes in our relationship, but I now know what to look for. You only know what to hide from. I will come across a genuine woman one day, I know for sure it will never be you. Some people stay children their whole lives, and I'm beginning to think you will be one of them. Your impression on my life is beginning to fade just as my emotions towards you have, and soon you will just be a morsel what once was. We all make mistakes and I hope some day soon you are brave enough to learn from yours. Wow, what an amazing post. You deserve better than how you were treated. Good luck finding her Link to post Share on other sites
giuliano-3 Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 J - You gutted me and left me to rot. Your actions in the past year indicate you never truly loved me. I was a convenience. I hope one day you learn that hurting a good man the way you did is unforgivable. I've tried to forgive and forget but that will never happen. I've learned so much this past year, faced so many demons and come out stronger than before. Thanks to you. You and Grey-Hair are perfect for each other. Party it up, forget about life stuff and keep being a princess. One day you will be gone from my conscious thought. That day is coming soon, I can feel it. You never deserved me. Eat a D, have fun at the Ritz-Carlton hanging out with psuedo-celebrities. You are a pampered, prissy, selfish and boorish little girl. If you ever grow up...nah, that won't happen. Good luck with life, you're going to need it. To do what you did the way you did it while I was going through what I was going through is unfathomable. You may have made me the loser short term by what you did, but long term it is you who will be paying the emotional cost. I curse you to feel guilt for a thousand lifetimes. I will never forgive you completely, hopefully I will forget you though. "you're the worst thing that's ever happened to me" Link to post Share on other sites
TragicAlliance Posted May 6, 2011 Share Posted May 6, 2011 Had a dream that I glimpsed at your screenname on MSN... dreamt that your personal message was about missing me. And because this dream was so vivid, I double-checked. I was wrong, just like I knew I would be. This is definitely going to be a long two weeks - fluctuating from not caring that you made no effort to feeling like total crap because a tiny part of me wishes you would try. I find myself seriously doubting those wonderful things you used to tell me: "TragicAlliance, you're the best thing that ever came into my life." ...If that were so, then how could you let me slip away so easily? If I was about to lose the best thing in my life, I'd fight like hell. To the death, even. I guess not everyone feels the way I do, though. I get the feeling I know what you're out there doing - throwing yourself into dangerous stuff, avoiding your computer like the plague, probably drinking yourself stupid at night. What's that going to accomplish for you, really? What if you break a limb while doing your thing and suddenly can't do it for a few months? What then? You need to find a safer outlet before you actually do hurt yourself. I know I shouldn't care anymore, but that's much easier said than done. I guess I need to take the next step - I need to gather my will and just delete you off the messengers, as I'm slowly becoming convinced that I'm holding onto a dead memory - the name of a ghost. But maybe then I'll be able to give up, just like you did, and find something else to spend my time on... although I won't be doing anything that I could possibly hurt myself physically doing. At some point, too, I guess I need to get rid of any of my stories and writings that had your character in them - guess I'm about to completely clean out my writing projects folder. You hated reading, and never read any of the works that I put so much of my time and energy into... just like you hated emotion and never did appreciate anything I did. You won't care about all that wasted emotion in those pages - but I will. If I weren't so emotionally messed up that I physically can't cry anymore, I know that doing this would make me. I'm planning to go to visit my mother and stepfather for the weekend, starting tomorrow afternoon. I guess all of this means I don't have to bother taking my laptop. Man, everything in my life completely snowballed, and where were you? Conveniently absent. Just like always. Whatever though. You're making it clear that I'm not worth your time anymore. Maybe one day you won't be worth mine, and we can both go on happy. Link to post Share on other sites
Moutonrose Posted May 7, 2011 Share Posted May 7, 2011 okay instead of sending this to my ex I will post here...cause I dont want to break nc....ever! I cannot beleive after 7 years you would do this to me.....the last 2 years you stopped loving me and decided it would be easier to lie to me each day??? wtf??? each I love you was fake...your smiles were fake, your kisses were fake and I guess when we made love it was just sex to you cause you were probably thinking of some other girl you banged....yeah nice for me to find out by my best friend that you apparently cheated on me for 2 years with many girls and that you came home after to me and did me afterwards! what the hell is going threw your head??? WHERE IS THE GUY I MET 7 YEARS AGO WHO HAD A ****ING HEART! how could you even plan a wedding with me if you didnt love me for the past 2 years out of 7!!! how??? how could you make all those fake promises to me....the baby, the house, the sheep farm we wanted to start....how could you just tell me everything was going to happen.... how could you also not even be able to tell me the truth on the ****ing day you break up with me!!!! tell me a ****ing lie that you are leaving me cause of my borderline personality disorder!!!! wtf??? I was heartbroken then cause you wanted to end our relantionship cause you didnt wanna wait 3 years for my group therapy clinic to get me back on track!!!! I cant beleive you also told me that you wanted us to get back together one day when I am all well and better so we can go on with our dreams!!!! those were lies....all lies....because all the truth came out a week later when you invited my best friend over to tell her everything so she could tell me cause you werent man enough to tell me to my face the truth.... you were always running...always running from the truth...and how nice was it for me to find out after that from a friend that your car was parked at one of our common friends house at 7am....you sure didnt go there to talk!!! you are a sick person....very sick...you have wasted my time and energy and made me sicker! I am fed up that about 10 people have lied to me none stop to hide your little dirty secrets...I cant beleive some of the people you screwed with were common friends!!! and they would come home to our place and would act like nothing happened....you never learned to respect boundries....you always wanted to be free.... you are free now...you are acting like a goddamn 17 year old. drinking all the time...hanging with people that are alot younger than you...partying with the same people and then going to work and acting like an ass over there....you are running your life....and you ruined mine...I am stuck at my dads who is bipolar and who lives in the middle of nowhere...I am alone and I have no friends here because you kicked me out....I had to move back to my dads who was 5 hours away... and what friends would I have back whre you are? none....they all lied to my face and betrayed me as well... I hope one day you find the courage to call me and tell me I am sorry for treating you like I did...I was wrong.... yes you were wrong...very wrong....but hey, i am going to wait a very long time for that phone call...cause i know you will never realise anything... rot in hell ******* sorry needed to get that all out before I exploded Link to post Share on other sites
IfiKnewThen Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 i didn't want to give you or us a hard time. i really didnt. crazy as it sounds i want to see you happy. i just didn't want to be treated like the plague anymore or worse totally invisible. its hard after 10 years, to at this point not have even gotten get a courtesy acknowledgment on any level. Link to post Share on other sites
loverboy1984 Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 Me:Hey Id like to order a Pizza, large with everything on it...uh hello? Her: excuse me? Me: sorry I got the wrong number, I thought I deleted your number from my phone. Her: ok whats up Me: Nothing hungry for some pie....not getting any from you so Im ordering. Her: dial tone..... Link to post Share on other sites
Ghosst Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 Me:Hey Id like to order a Pizza, large with everything on it...uh hello? Her: excuse me? Me: sorry I got the wrong number, I thought I deleted your number from my phone. Her: ok whats up Me: Nothing hungry for some pie....not getting any from you so Im ordering. Her: dial tone..... LOL.....good for you.....after all....still a sense of humour Link to post Share on other sites
Infomercials Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 Hey, I don't think we're done. You said you wanted space, and I smothered you. I wanted to keep acting like a couple even though we weren't...bad idea. I hope you figure everything out. I'll give you that space now, and I'll be even better in the future, with or without you. I still do hope it's with... Link to post Share on other sites
SimonSerenade Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 I can't believe you can still hurt me like you do after all this time and all this progress, thing's were absolutely fine the way they were so why louse that up for me?, your the one that messed this all up yet I'm the one getting punished for it day in day out, I can't see my son now for 3 weeks because your taking him away without once again asking my permission, your a spoilt brat and if there was any justice in the world then Lucas would be with me full time and you can see how this feels, to be pushed out, to be deprived, to be all alone. You always get your own way and I just wish that you could see this stranger that I see right now because back when we first met, you were lovely and kind and would never have caused any of this, now your bitter and twisted and say things like "sometime's I think it would be better if you and your mum didn't want access at all", that's just messed up but I'll never give you that satisfaction because despite what you think of me I am a damn good father and I would do anything for our little boy and you can just go to hell and burn there like you deserve if you ever try and deprive him of a real father. It took me a long time to get over you but no contact worked, I kept looking back and looking back and looking back until eventually I found a loophole and realised I was only looking back at the good stuff and next to that there was betrayal, lies, deceit, insults, no respect what so ever and romance and love was whistling in the wind as far as you were concerned, all you ever did was mess me around and throw me away time after time and I took it and condoned it because I didn't want to feel like a worthless no account and for some messed up reason I needed your validation to clear that up. I am so far from the weakling you once knew and I'm not going to sit around any more and take it up the tail pipe from you!, I can honestly say I don't take crap from anybody any more and I'll never let anybody hurt me or mistreat me the way you did because I deserve so much more than that, I am a good hearted loving person and one day you'll look back and know you messed that up because you'll never get better than what I gave you but for me, I will get better, I'll make sure I get better and when I do she is going to be a million times the person you ever were, right now I'm looking back on you and I ain't looking back in sorrow or anger or anything like that, I'm looking back on the selfish egotistical bitch that thankfully! got away. Link to post Share on other sites
bl22 Posted May 8, 2011 Share Posted May 8, 2011 I can't believe you can still hurt me like you do after all this time and all this progress, thing's were absolutely fine the way they were so why louse that up for me?, your the one that messed this all up yet I'm the one getting punished for it day in day out, I can't see my son now for 3 weeks because your taking him away without once again asking my permission, your a spoilt brat and if there was any justice in the world then Lucas would be with me full time and you can see how this feels, to be pushed out, to be deprived, to be all alone. You always get your own way and I just wish that you could see this stranger that I see right now because back when we first met, you were lovely and kind and would never have caused any of this, now your bitter and twisted and say things like "sometime's I think it would be better if you and your mum didn't want access at all", that's just messed up but I'll never give you that satisfaction because despite what you think of me I am a damn good father and I would do anything for our little boy and you can just go to hell and burn there like you deserve if you ever try and deprive him of a real father. It took me a long time to get over you but no contact worked, I kept looking back and looking back and looking back until eventually I found a loophole and realised I was only looking back at the good stuff and next to that there was betrayal, lies, deceit, insults, no respect what so ever and romance and love was whistling in the wind as far as you were concerned, all you ever did was mess me around and throw me away time after time and I took it and condoned it because I didn't want to feel like a worthless no account and for some messed up reason I needed your validation to clear that up. I am so far from the weakling you once knew and I'm not going to sit around any more and take it up the tail pipe from you!, I can honestly say I don't take crap from anybody any more and I'll never let anybody hurt me or mistreat me the way you did because I deserve so much more than that, I am a good hearted loving person and one day you'll look back and know you messed that up because you'll never get better than what I gave you but for me, I will get better, I'll make sure I get better and when I do she is going to be a million times the person you ever were, right now I'm looking back on you and I ain't looking back in sorrow or anger or anything like that, I'm looking back on the selfish egotistical bitch that thankfully! got away. well said Link to post Share on other sites
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