Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[sugahoney]

Dont know where else to put this, but I feel like I need to say this to get it out of my system.

 

After hearing a conversation I really shouldnt have, I am finished, I will not be contacting you anymore or responding to any attempts you make to contact me. I cant do it anymore, I tired of letting you mess with my head and make me think that there is a chance that we will get back together. I know now that its not possible, I'm tired of feeling this crappy when you cancel our plans and blow me off, I have never cried so much in my life and it sucks.

 

Just know I have no ill feelings towards you, I just need you to let me let you go. I have accepted that we would have never worked and I am not willing to waste anymore of my time crying over you and hoping. I hope I am strong enough to do this and I know it will be difficult for me seeing you everyday and keeping my distance but I know I have to try.

 

Dont worry I wont try to be friends with you because I know that wont work as long as I have these feelings.

 

I am letting go please let me do it.

[HopeDiesLast]

Hey ex-

THIS BETTER BE A PHASE.....seriously. who the f*** talks about rings while on vacation then breaks up with me a month later????? i dont give a sh*t what your coward ass says.....you freaked. u pussied out and crawled back into your cave when your ass figured out that u had to grow the F*** up. your so stupid. seriously. your just so dumb- you woulda had it made. i did everything for you. I asked you not to put me on the back burner- u never did. until u got scared. till u realized "oh sh*t this girls not going home for summer vacation like my college gf's. shes for real." and you bailed. YOU F***ING COWARD. GROW THE F*** UP AND COME BACK TO ME.

[laars]

To P,

 

I'm at such a loss at what to do. You said that if we break up now it will give us a better chance in the future but you don't think we should be expected to wait for one another. If you don't want me to wait for me don't give my any %$&*ing hope that we'll get back together. If you'd left it at goodbye I'd be finding it a lot easier to move on right now.

 

Right now I feel like a right idiot for hanging onto this. i'm trying to let go but it's so hard to let go of something that could be so good.

 

L

[Jono]

Another day without you.

Another day waking up angry and hurt.

The mornings are the worst. By the end of the day I've rationalsied it in my head and I go to bed ok, thinking it's gonna be alright. Then I wake up and it's like the weight of the world is crushing me into my bed. I feel like someone has kicked my chest in.

What kills me is that it's been like 3 or 4 weeks and you've moved on, got a new boyfriend, are happy, going on a holiday, having a great time. And here I am, miserable, dragging myself into work, draggin myself home to my empty house. I meet girls and I can't talk to them, the idea of being with someone else makes me sick. I slept with another girl the other day and I felt guilty. F#$$ing guilty!! Like I owed you something! And you're fine. It kills me.

How can you be so shallow? I want to see you suffer, just so I know the person I gave a year of my life to is an actual f#&$ing person, who feels things, who is real. How can you be so casual about it? How can you tell me that what you did was the right thing for both of us??? It was the right thing for you, you don't give a f$%k about what's right for me.

And what was I thinking in the first place? You were with a guy when I met you and you left him to be with me... So why am I surprised that you leave me and go to another guy? You are a dirty fu*$ing hussy!!

And I know it's your lack of self-esteem. I know that you need a guy to make you feel whole, to make yourself feel worthwhile. That you define yourself by outside compliments, outside influences. I realise that you'll do the same thing to this guy that you did to me, that you've done to so many other guys in the past.

But at the begining I warned you. I told you it was a bad idea. That you and I were from two different countries, that we would struggle to make a future. I told you I had had my heart broken before and I didn't want it to happen again. And what did you say? That we would make it work. That you wouldn't hurt me.

And now I'm just ****ing empty. There's an empty cavity where my heart used to be. I'm depressed, so depressed. I'm not sleeping enough, not eating right, not able to laugh and smile and be happy.

I just want my happiness back, my sense of myself. I want my self-esteem back, my confidence. I want to feel whole again. And the worst thing is my instinct is to turn to you. I want your sympathy, as stupid as that is. And you say you're sorry, that if the situation was reversed you'd feel horrible. F^%* you for that. F*%^ you for inflicting on me what you would never want to have inflicted on yourself. You selfish, immature bi&ch. You heartless, shallow little girl.

And now you're going back to Ireland, and I'll never see you smile again, never hear your voice, never make you laugh again. And I'll stay here and pick up the pieces of my life, pull it all back together. And I'll never forget, as much as I want to. I'll think of all the things we did together, when we went to Manly together on the ferry, when I held you as you cried about your friend passing away in that little one person bed in that apartment in Bondi. As I held you I thought to myself, 'I'll never hurt you. I'll always take care of you. I'll always be there for you. I won't let anything hurt you again.' And here I am. Alone, empty, hurt. And every memory stings, every thought of you is like a stab in the heart.

How could YOU do this? How could the person I trust the most betray me the worst? How could the person I cared about the most hurt me more than anyone else? What was I to you? Who am I now?

You've broken me. You've taken my dreams. You've shattered my confidence. You've stolen my happiness. I would have given you the world. And you didn't want it from me..........

My sweet, smiling Irish girl. Now a memory. It's like you've died. It's horrible. Just horrible.

And I don't know if I can do it again.

Goodbye baby. Goodbye my love. I miss you. I always will. I've nothing left.

[sugahoney]

Why did I agree to go to that movie with you tonight. I know you dont really care and just sitting there next to you with you trying to hold my hand and me knowing what I know hurt so much. I didnt want to have to tell you not to contact me, I thought I could just withdraw and you would leave it at that but I dont think that will work.

 

Are you really going to force me to tell you I dont want you in my life anymore? I wish I could get angry at you that would make this so much easier.

 

I really dont know what I am going to do.

[atzorvas]

To my ex-

 

Dumping me was the best thing you could do to me! Thanks for making me a better lover, guy, friend, kisser, etc... You allowed me to see my flaws and now I can correct them. I will have an awesome life in the future, I will get into med school, earn a nice salary, have a satisfying career, I'll be fit and healthy, and one day I will share all that with someone special and someone alot better than you! your loss, haha!

 

P.S. I don't love you anymore too! And I'm not hurting! Best of luck in the future =)

[tuscansun]

Hey A- it's me. Do you have any idea what Im going through to get over all of this? I have grown so much, I wish you could see it. I changed my hair, finally got that tattoo. Lost ten pounds...I look pretty darn good actually......

 

Church is wonderful, you should think about going back to yours. It's helped me so much.

 

This new chick has changed you so much. You're unrecognizeable. I hope you have friends that are brave enough to tell you that, I don't think you even need them too though...you already know. but you'll ride this train as far as it takes you.....

 

I wish you knew the deepness of my hurt. How stupid I feel for praying that the man you could never be would one day show up. But you never did. You failed me.

 

It took you so long to propose to me, I wonder if you'll wait so long with her, or just to prove you're a man you'll do it quick just so I can't say I told you so....I wonder what you'll do with that baby rattle I gave you with my promise that I'd give you children one day....I wonder if she'll find it in your drawer and wonder what it's diong there...I wonder what excuse you'll give. You always had an excuse for everything.

 

I'm throwing out our pictures today. All three years of them. GOne. I don't need them anymore. I'm done. I'm going to move on with my life now, and I will try so hard not to regret you, for my sake, not yours....You were my first love yes, but definitely not the love of my life...I have much more of it to live, and without you.

 

B

[saams]

'' Another day without you and damn i miss you, i wish things would have gone diffrently and i could hold you in my arms and look into your eyes again and tell you how much i loved you...

i guess nothings forever but i was hoping for it to last longer, i suppose we didnt match at all and it just wasnt meant to be but yet i feel like i've lost alot more then just a girlfriend.

i hope one day we can put this behind us and start over again.

i love you with all my heart.''

[Heal]

Just when i thought i was out, you pulled me back in.. and now you're being flakey. Yes i messed up the other night with that text but i was just protecting myself as you were just being too flakey..

 

**** you for that, **** you for contacting me. I texted you last night and no response.. Are you ****ing someone else? you told me you were'nt seeing anyone but you're so busy these days.. you must be...

 

I know you and i know how you work, you have one man and keep an ex hanging... I hate you for ignoring me and for canceling wednesday. I can't wait till i'm over you..

 

**** you

[skyjarr]

hey

 

so now that im here and you paid for my ticket there are just a few things i want to say...

 

please dont say anything...at least not until im done...thats THE LEAST you owe me

 

ive always been there for you anytime you needed someone to talk to and someone to vent to

 

the friend you called when you found out you got someone pregnant

 

the girl you cried to and told her things were supposed to be different

 

that one day our timing would be right

 

that you were tired of being hurt

 

the one you told that you hoped she could believe that you would never break her heart and that she was your perfect woman

 

....

 

i know deep down i honestly know by the way you would looked at me and the way you touched me and kissed me and wanted to look in my eyes while we were making love that you meant it

 

but you let him corrupt you-you let her corrupt you...you let everyone but me in and they told you half truths that permeated your insecure and childish brain and turned you into the ******* that everyone had always been to me and NO ONE ever expected of you

 

you let that manipulative lying cunt ass bitch hit you and yell at you because thats what your mother did and you dont think you deserve better....and instead of being with me you "settled" (your dads words NOT mine) and got back with her cause you felt bad you broke HER heart while i was dropped without a word from you

 

your a coward and now, you too unfortunately fall into the ******* category....youve said several times that i deserve better than you because you always mess up things that make you the happiest

 

and as much as i love you....more than you will ever care to believe for fear that it may ruin you once you realize what you let walk out of your life....you are not the *endearing nickname* i have known you as for all these years....you are now JOHN to me....and god that sounds awkward...but you are...and i dont deserve JOHN....i deserve *nickname* and so do you because we were BOTH happier than i had ever seen either of us....

 

but according to you hes "dead"....but really you just drowned him in the acohol that you also used to blind yourself to the ****ed up things you were doing....your a coward in the worst sense because you step on the really good people to make you feel better about YOU....even people you admittedly hate are treated better than me

 

i WILL NOT BE YOUR DOORMAT ANYMORE...and since the person i once knew is dead....i can not be your friend either....you are not a friend to me anymore...

 

you stole my heart only for the pure joy of crushing it and scattering the pieces to the wind while you laughed on the outside....

 

deep down i know you are crying and thats what makes it even harder....i know you way too well to hate you...but that would make it so much easier

 

someday i hope you find what i found in you-what i thought you found in me...unbelievable happiness, a sense of safety and trust, school girl giddiness and those lovely butterflies, everything youve ever wanted....

 

and you know what i hope happens??

 

 

 

i hope she loves you forever and i hope your smart enough to let her...

 

goodbye john

[Beee]

I miss you, every little part of me misses you! I miss waking up with you and going to sleep with you.... I miss laughing with you and just being with you!

 

I wish you could tell me it will all be better soon... I wish you would trun up on my door step and tell me what an idiot you've been... and lets try again!

 

I miss you!!!!

[sugahoney]

Maybe this decision was a mistake. What are you doing, why are you doing this to me. Why are you letting me know what you are doing. why did you text me last night to tell me you will be home soon. What does this mean?

 

Am I fooling myself that I can cut all contact with you? I dont want to push you to find out what is going on but we have some serious communication issues that we need to work out.

 

But again I am getting ahead of myself I dont even know where we stand.

 

Too many questions

[Tripped up]

Does what I did make everything impossible?

 

I kissed someone.....I feel horrible.

 

Does what you did make it impossible?

 

You lied, broke up with me, used my place to live, and brought drugs into OUR home. Why?

 

 

 

 

Now, after 2 years, after a month of being apart, and after just a week of you telling me you love me and kissing me.........you are mean to me.

 

You no longer want to see me.

You dont ever call me.

I truly believe that i am nothing more than an after thought of yours now.

 

Why is it that you always run when things get tough?

I NEVER ran.....No matter anything you said or did to us, me or yourself.

Why is this so easy for you.

I spoke to you just 2 days ago, returned your lost damn dog....and all you could do is leave because you didnt want to see me.

 

That hurt like you will never understand.

 

I find myself thinking that this will be the day that you call. This will be the day that you show up at my door. This is the day we will go see that movie we owe each other. Then I sink right back to reality, and realize that day will never come. You and I are no more. After as much I have loved....you have loved....We are no more. I truly wish we could embrace each other as we have in the past, and work through things rather than run away.......

 

 

But that will have to remain just a wish.....

[tuscansun]

Do you ever wake up in the morning and think about all the horrible things you've done to me?

 

When you look at her , do you ever think about whose expense your fling is costing? How much I have had to get over?

 

Are you hurting too?

4 years is a long time, I find if hard to believe that you're just okay....

 

On the other hand, I can't believe how selfish you've been this year....I could have been over you in January, but no, you dragged this on and on and on when all the time, you knew what you were working at with her.....Now it's August and Im just beginning the healing process because you had to be so selfish....

 

It's such a relief to know that I don't have to have you in my life anymore...

[sugahoney]

Another crappy day and guess what I am trying to so hard to move on. Every time I try to let go you do something to pull me back in, but I cant do this anymore I hurts too much, please let me let go.

 

I heard a line from a song today that said that the less you give the more I want and I realize that there is alot of truth to it. The more you ignore me the more I want you but I wont do it anymore, you might not see anything wrong with how you treat me but there is alot I cant take anymore.

 

I would love to tell you all of this but I refuse to speak to you, you are not worth my time or tears anymore.

[ahhhchooo]

Why'd you tell me there's a chance you'll come back? Why do you insist you still care for me? Why do you feel the need to even talk to me, when there's nothing to be said? All you do is take. You're unforgiven, and you will be so until the moment you prove yourself to me - but I guess that will never happen. Noone has ever made me feel this bad in my entire life, and you did it so carelessly.

 

I warned you before I'm old at heart, but you assured me that you'd take care of me, that I'd take care of you. You told me this exact situation would never happen and I listened. Your words meant nothing - except the world to me. I was stupid to trust you. I won't fall for it again.

[Jono]

Another morning waking up hurting. When does this go away?

I guess today isn't as bad as yesterday. Maybe tomorrow will be a bit easier again.

I need to let you go, I know I do. And I know I'm not letting myself, I keep refusing to forget you, I refuse to let what we had fade in my mind.

It's because I haven't gotten over you, I still have feelings for you. Unrequited love and all that garbage.

I know the best thing for me is to just say "fu-k her" and move on...

But the idea of that is horrible to me.

I need to move on. I need to stop humiliating myself by speaking to you, telling you how I feel. I have given away my power, you've unmanned me.

I need to find the strength though, to just say goodbye and mean it.

To let you just become a bitter memory. It just makes me so sad to do it.

But it's all I can do to save my self.

[wareagle]

Yea you were the one who dumped me left me for someone else without the decency to tell me the truth! In all reality though I was the one who really let you go! I was the one who went NC and ignored your pathetic attempts at keeping your foot in the door! I was the one who ignored your pathetic attempts to try and hurt me more months after you left my heart broken on the floor! So I am really the one who left you! I am the one who will not rebuild the bridge you have burned so many times before!!! So don't even bother attempting to contact me anymore for I am done with you!! You are nothing but a memory!!!

[JustSo]

Today I really have a bad day.. can't stop thinking of you..

 

I really want to tell you that I love you, but it won't change a thing... except pushing you away..

 

It's still strange that you start talking to me about all the stuff you do.. and never ask what I'm doing or did.. I don't know if you just don't care or that it hurts you to hear that I can have fun without you..

 

It's not that I can't have fun without you, I know I can do without you.. but I really don't want to..

 

I notice that when we meet, when I get close, you push me away.. but when I ignore you, you come closer.. Is this just jalousy or is it more?

 

I'm just confusing myself.. you know what you feel.. and I can't change it. I just have to accept it..

[sugahoney]

I am so sorry that I have to see you every day at work and pretend that I dont hate your guts. You have finally done it, you have made me hate you, are you happy now.

 

I can see now I have only been fooling myself that you care anything about me. Lastnight proved that, they say actions speak louder than words and I finally understand what is meant by that. You do one thing, knowing I would be angry and then have the nerve to ask me if I am not speaking to you. If I wasnt at work with ppl around listening I would have let you have all of the anger and frustration I have been keeping inside.

 

I now officially hate you, so you can stop pretending to care about me. You can go and talk to your new best friend, you have done with her what you refuse to do with me and I dont want it anymore.

 

Just go away and leave me alone. I hate you.

[Mending1985]

I need to get you out of my system. I need to remove this hold you have on me, because I'm strangling myself with the addiction, and it's eventually going to kill me if I don't harden up and walk away from this.

 

When I said I wanted you back the other night and it hurts that it's never going to happen and you replied with "How do you know it's never going to happen? You haven't given it enough time and space to happen!" it hurt all over aagain.

 

It's all about time and space, and even though I love you, I don't know if I have the time anymore. I can't get over someone specifically for the purpose of seeing if I'll fall back in love with them. It doesn't make any sense to me.

 

I know I pissed you off last night, and I know I should've left it alone, but you know me - not my strong point

 

I just want this to be easier. I don't want to think about you every 10 seconds. I want to think about something else in the morning and before I sleep at night. I don't want to drunk dial you anymore. I don't want to seek your approval. I just want this to be over and done with for now.

[BackonTrack]

**** im forgeting you, i wonder what you look like.

hrm, ah, hrm, i wonder if your still give me a blow job?

hrm, can i cum on your face???

hrm, i miss the blow jobs & the massages

 

you were the best **** buddy i ever had

 

why did i let you go?

[foolednm]

hello again,

 

 

After the wrongs you have done me. Things you said to me and about me. I forgave. I took you back, loved you, took care of you. After being a pillar in your life when you needed it most, you run from me when I need you most. I know I made a mistake too. But then you tell me that not everything is about me? Really?? ITS NEVER BEEN ABOUT ME! ITS ALWAYS BEEN ABOUT YOU! How you could even say this pisses me off and destroys my heart all at once. Everything I did was about and for you. Were you just looking for a way out? Had you already had your eye on your ex or someone new? How am I so easy to drop? Will I ever speak to you ever again. My guess would be no, you will never miss me, love me, or call me again. I have always loved you unconditionally, I pray that someday you realize this. Day 5 NC.

 

So true, it is all about THEM!! I gave and gave and even gave up my friends and family to try to make her happy, but it didn't work.

I have not had contact with her since the first week of June. I see her ocassionally here at work but we act like we don't know each other. No hello, no eye contact, nothing. It is amazing how so many people like us get so hurt by the one person we truly loved and were devoted to for so many years (9+) and they can just sleep with someone else the next night after sleeping with you. Yes, she did that. She blamed it on the alcohol, but she knew what she was doing. She even had a crue way to brag about it in an email...she wrote "how would you feel if I told you that I slept with someone else"? Well, how the hell do you THINK I would feel you dumb bitch?? Then while we were still trying to patch things up between us, she was advertising herself on yahoo personals and on match.com...she was on both of them at the same time!! Now she has a new boyfriend that has money and with as much debt that she has, I know she needs a sugar daddy.

 

So much for real love and real caring in a relationship. It was all about her. Everything was all about HER!! What can I do for her today, or this coming weekend, or when can we go to her parent's house or her daughter's house and see the grandkids. I totally loved her kids from middle school age through college, and they loved me too, but now that it's over, I hear nothing from them. I'm sure she slandered my name all over the place to her kids and parents.

It's funny how I loved her kids for all those years but yet she wanted nothign to do with my kids, only met each of my daughters once. Never asked about them, never cared. She had two daughters, I had two daughers and they were all very close in age, but she wouldn't allow my kids to get with her kids.

 

Oh well, I know I'm better off without her, but I do still miss the good things about her, but the bad things outweighed the good by about 5-1. We'd have one or two good days a week or so, then I'd have to kiss her ass or beg her to forgive me for doing something she didn't like for the rest of the week. Yeah, I miss her, she was so attractive and the sex was fantastic, but her moods and rules and controlling ways weren't very attractive or appealing. I put up with it, and it's still hard to forget the good stuff, but I'm trying. I'm really trying to get over her.

 

It's taking longer than I thought it would. WE all need help to get over loving someone with all our hearts and then they just run it through the blender. I wish I could erase every memory of her. I wish I never met her.

[blackandblue]

You broke my heart. Not just when we broke up; slowly at first, the whole time we were together, then suddenly at the end. You took so much from me and I let you, hell, I gave you it. I've gotten stronger since then and realized all my own self-worth. You'll never hear from me again and that's what you have to live with.

[foolednm]

You broke my heart. Not just when we broke up; slowly at first, the whole time we were together, then suddenly at the end. You took so much from me and I let you, hell, I gave you it. I've gotten stronger since then and realized all my own self-worth. You'll never hear from me again and that's what you have to live with.

 

All your words hit home. I could have written that word for word because I did the same thing, I gave and gave and gave, and it was never enough. I kissed her ass for so many years to try to make her happy. It didn't work. I wonder though, your last sentence is something I hope will give them something to think about, but I fear that once they have moved on to someone else, we aren't even a thought in their mind. I hope one day she looks back and realizes what she had and then she has to realize that she let me go and now she has to live with it.

So, I will echo your strong words. It has taken me a while but I too, have gained some strength and some self worth. It's a long, slow road unfortunately.....