Post here instead of contacting your ex!

[Trialbyfire]

S-

Are we friends or are you just like the rest of them? Are you hanging around pretending to care for the off chance that you will get in my pants again? I know that you aren't self aware enough to know how you feel let alone discuss it. I'm not angry with you but I hope you understand that I am beginning to get the impression that you don't respect me or my decisions. I need you to know that there is no chance of me getting back with you, there is no chance I will sleep with you. You had more time than I have ever given anyone to step up to the plate and you didn't. You have no right to pout and no right to dump on me everytime you feel a little jelousy. I don't appreciate you ignoring or avoiding things that are important parts of my life because you are still uncomfortable. It's been years since we broke up and we have been friends but if you are still this uncomfortable with me wanting someone else - so much that I can never even mention it... well, I think there is something you need to face. It is unfair that I should have to deal with your fickle friendship. I have not dared hurt you or upset you over my simply dating guys that might not have been around after a few months. Yet, you knew I was dating and trying. I was respectful and now you need to be that for me. You are either my friend or nothing. I need to be able to trust you. I need to know where you stand because I am not going to let a fox into the coup. I treated our relationship with the same respect. Remember? I hope you expected nothing less from me. So, ummm, what's it going to be?

-Charlotte

LC, I think you should just say this directly to your ex. What can you lose besides his friendship? What kind of friendship is it, if you can't be honest?

[LikeCharlotte]

LC, I think you should just say this directly to your ex. What can you lose besides his friendship? What kind of friendship is it, if you can't be honest?

You are 100% correct TBF. In fact I asked him to sit and talk with me but it hasn't happened in over a month because we are both pretty busy. I almost think he is avoiding it but I don't want to be paranoid because he agreed to talk about it and has apologized for his reactions recently. This was sort of a practice run. I am trying to get an idea of how I feel and how to best say it to him. I am not angry at him. I am more concerned that he might not be ready for a real friendship with me and I have enough respect for my newer relationship and myself to not allow these things to go unchecked. I know for certain that I am going to continue a romantic/intimate relationship with someone and if I cannot be honest about it with him then he isn't my friend. I know it might be a little hard sometimes for my ex but I need to know he respects me and really wants to be a friend - and that includes talking about or knowing (assuming they get on well) anyone I chose to love... so, yes. I will tell him. I'm just figuring out how. I don't want to seem angry but I also need to be firm on my point. I may post a few more. Didn't want to call him out of the blue and dump on him without some preparation.

[Trialbyfire]

You are 100% correct TBF. In fact I asked him to sit and talk with me but it hasn't happened in over a month because we are both pretty busy. I almost think he is avoiding it but I don't want to be paranoid because he agreed to talk about it and has apologized for his reactions recently. This was sort of a practice run. I am trying to get an idea of how I feel and how to best say it to him. I am not angry at him. I am more concerned that he might not be ready for a real friendship with me and I have enough respect for my newer relationship and myself to not allow these things to go unchecked. I know for certain that I am going to continue a romantic/intimate relationship with someone and if I cannot be honest about it with him then he isn't my friend. I know it might be a little hard sometimes for my ex but I need to know he respects me and really wants to be a friend - and that includes talking about or knowing (assuming they get on well) anyone I chose to love... so, yes. I will tell him. I'm just figuring out how. I don't want to seem angry but I also need to be firm on my point. I may post a few more. Didn't want to call him out of the blue and dump on him without some preparation.

It's all good if they're practice runs! As long as you get what you want from them and then take it to real life to get clarity from your ex, that's great. Sometimes you just have to take the bull by the horns. On the otherhand, sometimes the bull just needs a swift kick in the butt.

[Sandy22]

I stay up pretty late to see if you will come online but it seems you won't come on at least for a while following our conversation the other night. You seemed upset about what I said. Well, I did apologize and I'm sorry to for saying that. I didn't mean to put it that way. That being said, I want to ask you what is it that you want?? I can't assume i know so that is why i'm asking. If you want us to get back together then I'm afraid it isn't something we are just going to talk about on the phone. You will have to come into town so we can see each other and talk about things. I do have a lot on my mind to say to you and I know you do as well. I still care about you a LOT!

[BackonTrack2]

holy ****, i just had a realization... THANK YOU BABY GIRL!!!

 

man oh man, if you wasn't the trecitious scandlious, whoring young slut you were, man oh man, i would of married your stupid ass and then got cheated, destroyed even more 5 years down the line..

 

i'm breathing a sign of relief.... oh ****, thank you man, you thought me so much, about hurt, whores, females, everything, just what NOT i want.... thank you......

 

i couldn't see it but there is a light... hrm now i'm wondering if you felt the same way... well whatever who cares.. i learned.. thank you for being the whore that you were....

 

oh yeah.. what the hell are you up to anyway??? still whoring? did you get back in school?? ah whatever, good luck

 

 

damn.. maybe i could of had sex with you and your roomate at the same time... i wonder if i can still have sex with your bf??

 

damn.. i could of got more... i just wasn't thinking about using you....

my mind was messed up.... i just didn't want to do you dirty.... but you liked that, u wanted me too, u crazy

[Ratherunique]

Damn....thank god I initiated the break up. It was dumb of me to try to reconcile a day later b/c I missed the security, but imagine if I never did anything. Probably 2 years down the line, we probably would have been married, you would have left me for another man, and ran me for half of my assets. Thank god this ish is over. The sex was great, but I'll get more. All you were was a good piece of ass who's cunt smelled like fish. You are a female Narcissist who cares only about herself you damn whore.

[smiiiley]

I have so many things I want to say, I dont even know where to start. First I want to tell you that I go through so many emotions with after what you did to me. You have got me so messed up, it's like somebody shocked me and now I just don't know how to get back to my normal self. No matter how hard I try it never seems to work for me.

 

 

On one side I hate you so much and I am so hurt by your actions that I wish I could have told you exactly how I felt. Instead I made you feel like walking all over me was okay. IT WASN'T! How could you treat me so cold but have the guts to say you care about me so much.Why? No you don't. I don't even feel like writing anymore. I have so much to say but what's the point? I can't get closure from within. to me you were an angel, you were my everything. We were each other's first everything, how could you? I really hope someday I can tell you how much you hurt me, I regret being the "bigger person" because apparantly all that does is allow people to walk all over you

 

 

I love you so much and I wish you could have some respect for me and to apologize for how much you hurt me but you act like Im not even alive.

[LiveandLearn]

I relapsed. It's 4 in the morning and I couldn't sleep. I had to check your bank account to see what you've been up to. I checked your email. And I even checked your facebook. You bought her quite an expensive gift for xmas. I know it was for her because I know that's HER favorite store. I just KNOW you drove back down from San Francisco with her on Sunday. I just know it. I don't know how she did it; how she got away from her husband and her family for xmas weekend. I guess she doesn't care much about her family right now, or ever, really. This will come back and bite both of you in the ass later.

 

God, I was doing fine the past few days, too. I had a lot of fun with my friends on our road trip. But just being back at home got the best of me. Why can't I stop obsessing over you two? I mean, seeing you last week and seeing how sad you were, or you at least looked it for those few minutes we were together....how the hell did I get back here?

 

I want(ed) to get you a birthday gift. I don't know if I should anymore. I want to because I still care for you and still love you. I know you would like what it is I want to get you. But you don't deserve it. You don't deserve my kindness. I'm not the cold-hearted b*tch you once made me out to be. I know my gift would be more thoughtful and personal than whatever it is she will get you. She doesn't know you the way I know you. I'm trying really hard to tell myself to not get you anything for your birthday. Knowing how I am, I'll probably still get you that gift.

 

F-ing bastard. Why am I so nice to you after what you did to me??!?!?!??

[skinman]

Dear D.

 

I said something really mean the other night out of anger and I wanted to apologize for... I said I would never remember the good times we shared. It is because of all the good time we shared that I am finding it so difficult to let go even though i know I must do just that. At one time we shared a love for each other that was inseperable... You might not think that now but I know if you look back you will agree with me.I will never forget the good times we shared. You opened my eys to our country with our trips. So many wonderful memories to think back on with those alone.

 

The smile on your face with the birth of Sky the tear in your eye when B started pre school.. you know in my heart that I didn't mean what I said. I hope one day when all the hurts have healed that you to will be able to look back on the life we shared together and smile. Who knows maybe even shed a tear yourself..I know I will one day...

 

You know I will always have a reserved special spot in my heart for you and our memories... even knowing the way you feel now I would like to think that you will hold a place for me in your heart... Thank you for all the wonderful memories D......... You have taken everything else but you will never take those from me.....

[Crazy.S]

Damn man we used to be so close. We used to be able to share our problems together that we couldn't with other people. You were my best friend. We clicked on another level. I loss that and it sucks. I have no one to turn to. You used to be there for me when I had a problem. And now you are my problem. I have no one to turn to anymore. Why? Is this normal?

[Ash.]

My lucky streak of not dreaming of you has ended today. When I opened my eyes, I felt nothing but anger. The mornings are so difficult. I think about you all the time. I think about who you`re with. I can only imagine the things you must say about me now. I wonder sometimes, if I ever really knew you at all.

 

There are days where this all feels like a dream. There are days when I know its not. There are days when I can`t wait for the person who will take your place. Though I know it`ll hapen eventually, will I ever feel the way you made me feel again?

 

New Years Eve is tomorrow. I remember this time last year we were miserable without each other. Now I am just miserable without you. Sometimes I am so grateful you ended it, so we could both get out of that mess. So you couldn`t hurt me anymore, so I could get better. I miss you. I don`t want to know how you are, I don`t want confirmation of who you`re with, I don`t want to know the details of your priviledged life. But more than anything, I miss you.

 

I don`t know where you`re going for New Years, though I have a few guesses. I know when the countdown happens I`ll be trying to let go of all these memories, and leave you behind. I hope you think of me, really think about me, and miss me a little too.

[LikeCharlotte]

O-

I can't remember things. This happens more and more. I don't know where they go. I just tried to remember last year and I know you were there. I remember being nervous but that is all. Was it special in any way? You were right. I don't remember much. I'd ask you about it because I hate forgetting everything but it is better this way for me I think.

-Charlotte

[BikerBeagle]

I sincerely hope you have a great new year, C.

 

"My Wish" - Rascall Flatts

 

I hope the days come easy and the moments pass slow,

And each road leads you where you wanna go,

And if you're faced with a choice, and you have to choose,

I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.

And if one door opens to another door closed,

I hope you keep on walkin' till you find the window,

If it's cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile.

But more than anything, more than anything...

 

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,

Your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,

You never need to carry more than you can hold,

And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,

I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,

Yeah, this, is my wish.

 

I hope you never look back, but you never forget,

All the ones who loved you in the place you left,

I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,

And you help somebody every chance you get,

Oh, you find God's grace, in every mistake,

And always give more than you take.

But more than anything, yeah, more than anything...

 

My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,

Your dreams stay big, your worries stay small,

You never need to carry more than you can hold,

And while you're out there getting where you're getting to,

I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,

Yeah, this, is my wish.

 

This is my wish

I hope you know somebody loves you

May all your dreams stay big

[calculus]

Dear Ex,

 

Why do you keep on tormenting me on instant messenger. I'm already a nice guy where I don't really delete people but just simply ignore them. Yet you still happen to say hi. You ask if I'm still interested in being friends and when I offer a peace branch offering of "yes", you say you're still not over the hurt and don't know if you can get over the hurt. Then you have the nerve to unlist one of my good friends that actually understands me from facebook and you add this idiot friend who's only interested because I told him that it's like his type. And you talk to him too. Please make up your f'ing mind already. I already moved on and made peace with myself about you. I'm done crying, lamenting, ruminating why I said that hurtful things. I'm tired of remembering the good memories I had in the relationship that I lsot. I already told you that I wish I could take back what I said. Remember how you said you wanted to work through the hard times with me? Well I guess you didn't want to that last time. I've already asked around solid references and they mentioned that what I said definitely isn't worth breaking up over, but I think this was your opening to run back to your former flame. Ooops. That's crashed and burned though since you told me he didn't want anything to do with you anymore. Please leave me alone. I'm trying to get back to the point of my life before you entered it. When I was single and happy. This is a new year and don't want old baggage following me around. Sure, you're a part of me since we had that short relationship and yes I did have that feeling of love for the first time with you, but you're an ex now. You broke it off even though I wanted to work things out. So please stop bothering me.

[jc]

Well Mister.

 

This is not how things were supposed to turn out. Remember all those plans we had? The life we dreamed up together? The life that we were living together? Why was this so easy to give up on for you? Did you ever really love me?

 

You had so many reasons for breaking up and none at all. You're confused. You're not happy. I don't make you happy anymore. You felt like you were dating your ex again. The last couple of weeks were horrible. You had a horrible time on vacation. I wouldn't give you the space you needed. You don't know what you want. You need some time. You want to be single. You think I need some time to be on my own to work on myself.

 

But I guess it all amounts to the same thing. What you want is a life without me in it.

 

The last time I saw you, I asked you "So you'd rather go through life without me than with me?". And you said "I guess so".

 

I wish I could believe that this was a mistake. That you haven't really thought this through. Well maybe you haven't. Maybe in a couple of months you'll have changed your mind. But by then it will be too late. It's too late right now. You threw me away. And people who love each other and who want to be together don't do that.

 

I know that this had to happen. Otherwise, how can I find a real, true partner? I wish it could have been you. But it's not. I just need to believe that.

[onemorecupofcoffee]

Dear you,

 

It's only been a day and already I miss you. I hope you are missing me too. I also hope you think what I think you're thinking and that we both need some time to grow up and maybe live closer to each other in order to really get to know each other. I also hope that we truly do stay in touch... that I get to hear what you're up to every now and then, maybe we get to visit for a cup of coffee every now and then to catch up.

 

Maybe this is the way we should have done it - go through the getting to know you phase first. It gives me hope that we can fill in all the stuff that was missing the two times we tried this. Maybe we will rediscover that we are compatible, that you are the one for me and I'm the one for you, just like we thought when we first met. Just like we thought when we endured all that time apart but still together.

 

Like I said, I miss you. Maybe I'll post again to tell you how I'm doing down the road. In the meantime I am looking forward to the next time we get in touch. I hope new years' went alright for you, and I can't wait to get to know you better to see if we really could have been something great, like you always told me we could be.

[alwayssme]

Why did you do this to me. What we had was so pure. I am so angry at you. You were my everything. You were my life. You were my love. Why couldn't we have worked through our problems together? Or is that just a delusion. F*ck you. You are a vile person. I shouldn't love you.

 

 

lol co-sign

[Surfer Dude]

You vermin piece of sh*t, if you contact me ever again, I'll visit your new boyfriends with a baseball bat and crack some skulls.

 

F*CK OFF! LEAVE ME ALONE!

[D-Lish]

One week of me ignoring you... Today I feel sick missing you and all I wonder about is if you've met someone new yet.

 

I got your last message two days ago... I'm still holding on strong not answering you.

 

I hope one day you look back on us and realize what you've lost. I also hope by the time you come to that realization that I have moved on...

[smiiiley]

Ew it makes me sick thinking of you with someone else...i have no idea if you are or not..I am listening to people and doing NC although it isnt really healing me...

 

 

Was it a good thing that I walked away being "the bigger person"? Sometimes I wish I could call you and let you know about all the hell you put me through...u really have no idea because i try to act like im okay...maybe that just makes u feel less guilty...But then talking to you, you wouldnt understand because you even said it yourself, i was your first relationship and nobody ever broke your heart so you have no idea how this feels...so of course u wouldnt understand...

 

 

im so angry at you....it makes me want to call you and just scream at you but instead i'll just suck it up and try to move on....i hope someday u can at least realize how ****ed up you got me and maybe if u ever feel this pain in your life, then you'll realize how much i loved you and how heartless you were to me. maybe then you will feel some remorse...

 

 

all this pain for simply loving your ass!!!! thanks alot...you have managed to become the worst thing in my whole entire life...sucks at one point you were the best thing that ever happened to me........i wish i never fell in love, blah

[EmperorR]

I guarantee you'll cheat on your new bf when you go back to russia this year.

[not_a_happy_camper]

i haven't got a lot to say to you.

 

two words; your loss

[GoneButNotForgotten]

I hope that you can live with your decision. I poured my hear out to you. I wanted more than anything to make it work. But you know what you did? You ran away. Just like your dad. I've done my grieving for this relationship. I can only hope that the grass really is greener on the other side. Because you kept pushing me. Well you found you breaking point. I can only hope that the lesson has been learned. I have no ill wishes toward you. You made your choice. You turned down someone that wanted to treat you like a princess. You turned down someone who put your wellbeing before his own. I made my choices and I would not change them given the chance. I have made mistakes. I have made errors. This one is not mine and I am thankful for that. Your friends are a great bunch of people from what I can tell. I can only hope that they are worth the loss of someone who loves you and had the same idea of life ever after as you. I guess at this point all I can do is thank you. Thank you for setting me free to find someone who wants to be with me. Someone that when I say I want to spend the rest of my life with, that they can say the same thing back to me in pure honesty. And not be lying to me just to drag the relationship on for longer. Thank you for your compassion in breaking my heart into a million little pieces that can pass through the eye of a needle. It may not seem like it, but there is no sarcasm. The scars remind me that the past is real. While I pick up the pieces of my broken heart one small fragment at a time, I can only hope that I can still trust and love as deeply as that which I had for you. I do not regret my decision to come back and stay in Texas for you. I do not regret many things that I have done. You can regret, you can hate me, I do not care. You have made a choice to cast out the one person that would not leave you. I hope that you can find the love in your life that you are looking for. I know that I will find mine someday. Thank you for setting me free to find that person.

 

(I wrote this while drunk last night and managed to pass out before sending it LOL)

[MWH]

Dear Ex,

 

I hate calling you that. "Ex". You are SO much more to me than that.

 

Well today I go back to work. I hope there is some money to be made as I'm broke and business is the worst it has ever been. Life is the worst it has ever been too. The whole damn thing just stinks.

 

I'm sorry you gave up on us. You never even tried. You broke every promise you made and in the end you raged just as you had in the beginning. It hurts me so badly that you color our demise as inevitable, that you are too "tired" to make any effort. You never DID make any effort; you only talked about it.

 

I know that you're all mixed up and in a way that makes it easier for me. A lot of the things talked about here on LS don't really apply because of your issues. I used to visit another site that dealt more specifically with the issues that you have but all it really was was a place where people just ripped on their Ex. How can I rip on you beause you have some problems? I can't do that. I come here because I have a better chance of healing.

 

I've gone through the anger stage. I never was one to stay mad for too long. I can't be mad at you for something you have no control over. I can, however, be mad that you refuse to admit your problems and you refuse to seek help and in the end you refused to work with me. Sure, I'm mad at those facts but I'm not mad at you. Not at all. I know that the awful things that have been eating you alive for so long are the things that keep you from seeing the truth about your actions and the motives behind them.

 

I know how smart you are and I know how deeply you feel things and it frustrates me that in spite of that you suffer and have in turn caused me this great suffering as well. I'm mad at the damage done to you and I'm mad at the animals who damaged you. I wish there ws some way to get through to you that I'm not mad at YOU.

 

In fact I love you. Always have. I stood by you through thick and thin and right up to the bitter end I hoped that we could work together as a team to get past your troubles and have a good life together.

 

I did the best I could and I guess you did too. It is not your fault that you have problems. You don't deserve it at all. In the end, though, it seems that we both got ripped off.

 

We had it made in the shade dammit. In all my years I've never EVER felt so ripped off.

 

There is nothing I can do except try to move on in my life. I'm going to work today, thank God, and I hope that makes things a little easier for me. This time off has been like prison for me. Empty days blurring into empty dark nights. I don't have any hope to grasp ahold of and I don't have anyone to talk to about all this other than the people on LS. As I said, though, a lot of our situation simply doesn't apply. I do my best to get something out of it to hold on to and take forward with me.

 

I miss you so badly it literally hurts inside. This is, by far, the very worst pain I've ever felt. I'm sure you are hurting too. You have no idea how many times I've felt like picking up the phone or driving to your house. I sat here alone on Christmas Eve and lit a candle in keeping with our tradition of lighting that night with only candles. I sat here and hoped that you would arrive. I know- just a silly sad wish of a lonely little boy on Christmas. I wonder if you felt me that night? it is impossible to ignore the connections we shared and I still wonder if you feel me. I don't suppose I'll never know.

 

I'm sorry you gave up before you ever really started. I never did get that fair shake but there is no sense whining about that now.

 

I wish you well and I hope you get well.

 

I love you, I miss you, and I care about you. I just can't do anything about that so here I sit writing to nobody as the sun rises on this cold winter morning.

 

I would have carried you on my back. If only you had let me.

 

Love,

 

MWH

[LiveandLearn]

Happy New Year to you, too. I got your txt yesterday. I contemplated whether to txt you back or not. I haven't yet. I don't think I will. We last talked Christmas day. Your birthday is coming up next week. I guess that'll be the next time you hear from me. I'm not that bitter or cold-hearted to ignore you on your birthday. I know how much birthdays mean to you. I actually got you a gift. I'm sure you'll like it. You won't be getting it from me directly though. I wish you well this year. It's a new year; a fresh start. I am looking forward to having a wonderful and eventful year.