Art_Critic Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 So then you think the blame is 100% against the doc and zero% againt her? I don't agree. She is NOT an innocent victim. She's got a selfish agenda of her own. And her talk of love and marriage doesn't make it all OK. Based on what she says, the doc is a scumbag. But she's wrong too. And you're one of the women here who is overlooking he part in this. I'll hand it to you for being sympathetic but that's about it. First off.. I'm a guy.. A clown... She may have her own agenda.. but she is the one with the issue that she is seeing a therapist for.. He isn't paying her to fix his issues.. As far as I see it her responsibility ends when she writes the check to her therapist.. it then becomes his.. She is responsible for going to the therapist and her actions outside of therapy.. But inside of therapy he maintains control of the room and the session so the responsibility is his and only his .. Link to post Share on other sites
pulse Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 So then you think the blame is 100% against the doc and zero% againt her? I don't agree. She is NOT an innocent victim. She's got a selfish agenda of her own. And her talk of love and marriage doesn't make it all OK. Based on what she says, the doc is a scumbag. But she's wrong too. And you're one of the women here who is overlooking he part in this. I'll hand it to you for being sympathetic but that's about it. While he is not responsible for her crush, he is responsible for leading her on. He should have recommended her to another therapist once he realized that she was becoming emotionally attached to him, rather than kissing her. She is vulnerable and he is the one who is being paid to help her reach emotional help and he is taking advantage of her vulnerability. Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Give me a break.... Let me guess.... Women who get raped and dress provocative and ooze sex are also not victims ?.. They were asking for it ? You'd be wrong there too. Women who dress provactive and ooz sex are very cool - to me. Rape, on the other hand, is violent and horrible, not her fault. Doctors preying on patients - very bad. Women (even weak patients) trying to steal the doctor from a happy marriage (her words) - Also bad. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Greg.. If you go to a mechanic to have your car worked on and tell them the clutch might be going out and they replace the clutch and some other things. Then you find out that nothing was wrong with your car that it was only a lose screw that they tightened. When you questioned them they told you that when you brought the car in that you said it was the clutch so they aren't responsible that you are becuase you said the clutch might need replaced. Is it your fault the clutch got replaced ??? No... You payed them to fix your car.. not rip you off.. He is ripping her off... Granted comparing a car to therapy isn't exactly apples to apples but I thought I might try the logical approach with you. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Doctors preying on patients - very bad. Also against the law Greg... the DR is held civilly liable in court for this and all repercussions of this.. including his license. If there is fraud involved then it is criminal.. Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 First off.. I'm a guy.. A clown... Jeeez - I'm sorry - the picture looked like Tammy Baker ... I thought you were a girl Link to post Share on other sites
torranceshipman Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Come on guys, the guy is a Class A sleazebag. This is total manipulation and control of a very vulnerable woman, who felt that she could trust him implicitly (as he is a therapist) and let her guard down totally at her most vulnerable moment...that's the point of therapy, isn't it?-to open up emotionally, let your guard down, etc, which I presume requires real trust...on top of that, he is married - so a total lying sleaze, and clearly devoidof conscience...he actually sounds like a dangerous guy and to be honest, a little bit sinister, given that he can manipulate and use his authority in the situation to take advantage of vulnerable people like this (I am sure that this woman wasn't the first and certainly wont be the last)... Are you sure he is completely qualiied? Have you checked out his qualifications? Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Also against the law Greg... the DR is held civilly liable in court for this and all repercussions of this.. including his license. If there is fraud involved then it is criminal.. She's still not innocent. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Jeeez - I'm sorry - the picture looked like Tammy Baker ... I thought you were a girl That is just my humor I guess.... Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Come on guys, the guy is a Class A sleazebag. This is total manipulation and control of a very vulnerable woman, who felt that she could trust him implicitly (as he is a therapist) and let her guard down totally at her most vulnerable moment...that's the point of therapy, isn't it?-to open up emotionally, let your guard down, etc, which I presume requires real trust...on top of that, he is married - so a total lying sleaze, and clearly devoidof conscience...he actually sounds like a dangerous guy and to be honest, a little bit sinister, given that he can manipulate and use his authority in the situation to take advantage of vulnerable people like this (I am sure that this woman wasn't the first and certainly wont be the last)... Are you sure he is completely qualiied? Have you checked out his qualifications? YES - HE A TOTAL SCUMBAG - OK? But what about her? What about trying to break up the scumbag's marriage? Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 But what about her? What about trying to break up the scumbag's marriage? That needs to be dealt with in therapy.. with a new therapist..preferably a female one... this latest twist with her therapist is going to set her back emotional and certainly financially Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 She's still not innocent. No, not completely innocent. She's allowing the manipulation by creating a fantasy to affirm the rightness of the situation. But... Look at her and tell me this isn't someone who needs therapy, therapy that should help her, not hinder her ability to recover. Full circle back to the therapist... Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 That needs to be dealt with in therapy.. with a new therapist..preferably a female one... this latest twist with her therapist is going to set her back emotional and certainly financially And again ... you keep trying to convince me he's a bad guy. I agree. But you also keep trying to convince me that she's innocent in it all. I don't agree. ---------------------------------------------------- Art Critic: Do you realized you even implied that I'd blame a sexy girl for getting raped? Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 No, not completely innocent. But... Full circle back to the therapist... Sounds like you kinda - sorta want to admit she's responsible too. But then back to full blame on him. Oh ... maybe you mean innocent by reason of mental problems ... So if a girl who wasn't being manipulated by a shrink, tried to break up a happy marriage. Then would you see that as wrong? Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Sounds like you kinda - sorta want to admit she's responsible too. But then back to full blame on him. Oh ... maybe you mean innocent by reason of mental problems ... So if a girl who wasn't being manipulated bu a shrink, tried to break up a happy marriage. Then would you see that as wrong? If someone is seeing a doctor for a painful terminal medical condition and the doctor knowing this, manipulated this person to ensure he was the only beneficiary in her will, do you consider her a victim? After all, he was only being kind and helping to alleviate her pain, no? Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 She's allowing the manipulation by creating a fantasy to affirm the rightness of the situation. Right! - rationalizing. ... and when a guy does it, it's called bull sh*t, even if he does believe his own bull sh*t. And now you believe her "manipulation by creating a fantasy to affirm the rightness of the situation" (bull sh*t). Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Right! - rationalizing. ... and when a guy does it, it's called bull sh*t, even if he does believe his own bull sh*t. And now you believe her "manipulation by creating a fantasy to affirm the rightness of the situation" (bull sh*t). Answer my question. Link to post Share on other sites
Storyrider Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 YES - HE A TOTAL SCUMBAG - OK? But what about her? What about trying to break up the scumbag's marriage? Here's the thing, though. We don't know the exact nature of her problems. As Amerikajin pointed out, she writes well and can make arguments rationally. But that doesn't mean her decision-making abilities and her emotional state are normal. I have a feeling her inability to judge character, to make good choices for herself, and to see things objectively are part of her disorder. And he knows every last detail of her disordered mind. As if he had a map. I'm not saying this excuses her, but if she were a child would you hold her responsible? She is very child-like in some ways. Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 If someone is seeing a doctor for a painful terminal medical condition and the doctor knowing this, manipulated this person to ensure he was the only beneficiary in her will, do you consider her a victim? After all, he was only being kind and helping to alleviate her pain, no? OK OK - answering your question here. I'd agree the doc's a manipulating scumbag - OK. But let's correct you're analogy to fit Fun2BeMe ... This time the patient is trying to break up the scumbag's marriage. You think that's OK cause the doc's a scumbag. Another slight correction ... I think this doc wants punnani - not her estate. - But I still thinks he's a scumbag. I guess you just think she's totally innocent because he's a predator. And I think she's a scumbag-ett. I doubt we'll agree. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 OK OK - answering your question here. I'd agree the doc's a manipulating scumbag - OK. But let's correct you're analogy to fit Fun2BeMe ... This time the patient is trying to break up the scumbag's marriage. You think that's OK cause the doc's a scumbag. Another slight correction ... I think this doc wants punnani - not her estate. - But I still thinks he's a scumbag. I guess you just think she's totally innocent because he's a predator. And I think she's a scumbag-ett. I doubt we'll agree. F2BM is quite wealthy... Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 But that doesn't mean her decision-making abilities and her emotional state are normal. I have a feeling her inability to judge character, to make good choices for herself, and to see things objectively are part of her disorder. ... I'm not saying this excuses her, but if she were a child would you hold her responsible? She is very child-like in some ways. I agree about her mental state. Her condition (limited reaoning) is intuitively obvious to the most casual observer. But even with a child ... we're not talking about cookies are we? We're talking about marriage break-ups. Yes, even children must be told when they're wrong too. And I'll never agree with all these excuses that so many here are willing to allow for what she's up to. Except for Art Critic - I think you're women who will cut some serious slack for her because she's a woman, - and a patient to boot. Link to post Share on other sites
GregsBad Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 F2BM is quite wealthy... Oh .... maybe he is after money and not punnani. So how much money we talking about? Hmmm ... and she certainly seems like a sexual girl ... I'm single and she wouldn't have to kill a marriage You know, I'm begining to see your side of this thing Link to post Share on other sites
Storyrider Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 The first fifteen pages of this thread are all men and women telling her she's wrong. I do think she's wrong. But he is mostly responsible. Should she drop him and drop this whole thing? Absolutely. However, I don't appreciate your accusation that my opinion derives from my gender rather than from my own reasoning, which is not impaired at all. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Hmmm ... and she certainly seems like a sexual girl ... Okay, just relax GB. You're certainly showing signs of living up to your username. In all honesty, if you don't want to give advice, stay off this thread. At this point I think FUN needs more support than BASHING. You're going in circles, arguing that she is more at fault than him. WTF. He should know better, he's the therapist, he's the one who sees her vunerable, who knows things about her, private things, and he was WELL AWARE of her 'transference of feelings' a while ago. Yes, she is wrong to kiss him, or kissed her, who cares now how it happened, POINT IS, it did happen, so let's just focus on HOW we all can support her to help get her OUT OF this situation! She's already decided she's NOT having sex with him, so your little 'hmm, she seems sexual" comment is cruel. Go back and read her past posts for the year, maybe then you'll understand her frame of mind and why she was IN therapy for starters.... PS oh yeah, A_C is a GUY not a GAL. Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 I can't help but to wonder how today's session went. If she told him about this thread, and he reads it - she is hosed. He will use every single thing in this thread to manipulate her further and demonize the people who are trying to convince her to untangle herself from this mess. Link to post Share on other sites
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