Woggle Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 Cheating and affairs are not passive acts. They are something that you actively choose to do. I have done many wrong things in my life but I own up to it and I acknowledge that it was my doing. Some people on here act like they are being governed by some magical force beyind their control that is making them do these things. Link to post Share on other sites
Author scaredinlove Posted May 4, 2007 Author Share Posted May 4, 2007 Nothing is always black and white in life, but even if a BS is a horrible person, it's still a thinking process and a choice for a WS to cheat. But, to say that the BS drove the person to cheat is a cop-out...Especially if the BS is an abuser, that's like saying the WS deserved to be abused because WS drove BS to abuse them...So WS cheats because BS made them do it, it was their only choice? What ever happened to just leaving? No it is not there only choice, but sometimes people visions are clouded for pain or despair and they make wrong choices. You may not have been around a lot of crazy people like I did, unfortunately just leaving is not that easy. Link to post Share on other sites
Author scaredinlove Posted May 4, 2007 Author Share Posted May 4, 2007 Cheating and affairs are not passive acts. They are something that you actively choose to do. I have done many wrong things in my life but I own up to it and I acknowledge that it was my doing. Some people on here act like they are being governed by some magical force beyind their control that is making them do these things. Not everyone is self assured and strong. It is good to be able to come up and say that you you have control of your life and self. Not everyone is like that. And there are magical forces that make you do things you didn't want. Those magical sources are the reason people seek support groups and therapists. Some want to find and will find why they did something and move on.Some won't! Some won't een realise they need help. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 No it is not there only choice, but sometimes people visions are clouded for pain or despair and they make wrong choices. You may not have been around a lot of crazy people like I did, unfortunately just leaving is not that easy. Well, I've been around some crazy people..including my ex. Who said leaving is easy? Do you always only do what's easy even if it's the wrong thing to do? Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 Not everyone is self assured and strong. It is good to be able to come up and say that you you have control of your life and self. Not everyone is like that. And there are magical forces that make you do things you didn't want. Those magical sources are the reason people seek support groups and therapists. Some want to find and will find why they did something and move on.Some won't! Some won't een realise they need help. The only answer to a person's problems is to become self assured and strong. Taking reponsibility for your life is the only way to improve a situation. I do have sympathy for people in horrible situations who do dsersperate things to survive but for people who are addicted to relationships with people that are obviously not good for them I have no sympathy. I also have no sympathy for people who are bored in their marriages and cheat instead of fixing things or getting out. Link to post Share on other sites
Author scaredinlove Posted May 4, 2007 Author Share Posted May 4, 2007 Well, I've been around some crazy people..including my ex. Who said leaving is easy? Do you always only do what's easy even if it's the wrong thing to do? No, I left my exH and I it wasn't easy, I could have ended dead. But I cannot expect everyone to do the same. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 No, I left my exH and I it wasn't easy, I could have ended dead. But I cannot expect everyone to do the same. Well, that's very strong of you to do that. And I guarantee that no external "magical force" was involved in your strength. It comes from within. Link to post Share on other sites
Author scaredinlove Posted May 4, 2007 Author Share Posted May 4, 2007 The only answer to a person's problems is to become self assured and strong. Taking reponsibility for your life is the only way to improve a situation. I do have sympathy for people in horrible situations who do dsersperate things to survive but for people who are addicted to relationships with people that are obviously not good for them I have no sympathy. I also have no sympathy for people who are bored in their marriages and cheat instead of fixing things or getting out. Sometimes becoming self assured and strong takes years and many mistakes.There is a saying that say that " sometimes a person has to go all the way on the wrong path before they can turn to the right one." Link to post Share on other sites
Salicious Crumb Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 Are you sure you are not hurting people deliberated too? deliberated? And I do not and will not deliberately hurt anyone that doesn't deserve it. If someone is an uncaring and destructive person to someone else, then boo hoo if they can't take the heat. If you want to deliberately hurt other people so you can sleep with someone elses husband, don't expect sympathy from anyone except other people that could care less who they hurt to get their own satisfaction out of the situation. Link to post Share on other sites
Salicious Crumb Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 No I just said that we should not be black and white, there are a lot of gray areas in this situations. Maybe the BS is a orrible abusive person and the WS cannot find a way out and they cheat. Oh thats brilliant...if a BS is an abuser, especially a physical abuser....then hey..by your logic...go out and cheat. Ya, thats the ticket...do something that will REALLY get our ass beat. But this isn't the case with your situation..the woman whose husband you are boinking isn't beating his ass........or is she? I assume not because you made absolutely no mention of it. Link to post Share on other sites
Salicious Crumb Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 Not everyone is self assured and strong. It is good to be able to come up and say that you you have control of your life and self. Not everyone is like that. And there are magical forces that make you do things you didn't want. Well there is a place for people who are controlled by "magical forces"...its called an insane asylum. Not talking about people with a weak constitution...talking about the mention of "magical forces" here. You really believe in a magical force that controls you? really? Link to post Share on other sites
Author scaredinlove Posted May 4, 2007 Author Share Posted May 4, 2007 deliberated? And I do not and will not deliberately hurt anyone that doesn't deserve it. If someone is an uncaring and destructive person to someone else, then boo hoo if they can't take the heat. So you do hurt people deliberated ! God Bless you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author scaredinlove Posted May 4, 2007 Author Share Posted May 4, 2007 Well there is a place for people who are controlled by "magical forces"...its called an insane asylum. Not talking about people with a weak constitution...talking about the mention of "magical forces" here. You really believe in a magical force that controls you? really? I hope you to find love in this world! Link to post Share on other sites
Author scaredinlove Posted May 4, 2007 Author Share Posted May 4, 2007 Oh thats brilliant...if a BS is an abuser, especially a physical abuser....then hey..by your logic...go out and cheat. Ya, thats the ticket...do something that will REALLY get our ass beat. But this isn't the case with your situation..the woman whose husband you are boinking isn't beating his ass........or is she? I assume not because you made absolutely no mention of it. She did have a affair that lasted three times longer his and mine ,and that happened before I come to the picture. Am I OK now ? according to or logic I am. According to you if she hurt him before I can hurt her. That is not how I think but according to your logic I am free of charges.I Am found not guilty , realised!!!!!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 Worrying about being killed is not a reason to think why not to do this stop putting fear into her n reguards to this matter. Instead think of reality. OP's life is meaningfull, she is struggling with this decision or she would not have posted this thread to being with. I don't think that she wants to be his mistress forever she knows it and I know it... Death is a reality! Fear can prevent a person from doing harmful things to one's self, including putting yourself in danger! Apparently it's wrong to point out the dangers, oh well..... time to bite the bullet. Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 Hi Pricillia, I was not targeting possible violence in Darths comment, but the fact that I thought less of myself and am now thinking more of myself.... For the record, fear saved my life, fear is not always a bad thing.... My point in general. Link to post Share on other sites
Darth Vader Posted May 4, 2007 Share Posted May 4, 2007 and I should add... that these people who are quick to judge should never say never... (could happen to them as well) People who say never say never in these cases say that because it eases their guilt from their own actions. Also saying people judging means, they don't want to take responsibility for their actions. So they say that to cover themselves, what bullcrap! Link to post Share on other sites
Salicious Crumb Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 deliberated? And I do not and will not deliberately hurt anyone that doesn't deserve it. If someone is an uncaring and destructive person to someone else, then boo hoo if they can't take the heat. So you do hurt people deliberated ! God Bless you. First of all, you use "deliberated" wrong in a sentence. Secondly...people who hurt people deliberately who don't deserve it, like you, deserve to be chastised for the hurt you are bestowing on people. I hope this wife of the other man finds out and comes looking for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Salicious Crumb Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 I hope you to find love in this world! You don't know what love is. Nice try at pretending to have a heart...god knows you could care less about the woman and kids of the husband and father you are spreading your legs for. Link to post Share on other sites
Salicious Crumb Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 She did have a affair that lasted three times longer his and mine ,and that happened before I come to the picture. Hmmm...yet you didn't mention this before...it would have been an important piece of the story if that were true.....so why don't I believe you? Am I OK now ? according to or logic I am. According to my logic? When did I EVER say cheating and sleeping with someone elses spouse is ok? Never...thats when. Nice try at pulling something out of thin air. And no...you are not ok. According to you if she hurt him before I can hurt her. When did I say that?..care to quote? That is not how I think but according to your logic I am free of charges.I Am found not guilty , realised!!!!!!!!!!! Once again, you are pulling this out of your ass. Anyone who knows my posts KNOWS that I don't think cheating and being the OM/OW is ok......EVER. Once again...care to quote where I ever said anything of the sort? Good luck hunting all over this forum for such proof of your assertions though. Link to post Share on other sites
Salicious Crumb Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 People who say never say never in these cases say that because it eases their guilt from their own actions. Also saying people judging means, they don't want to take responsibility for their actions. So they say that to cover themselves, what bullcrap! BINGO!!....very well said. Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 You don't know what love is. Nice try at pretending to have a heart...god knows you could care less about the woman and kids of the husband and father you are spreading your legs for. SC... yet another example of you putting your feelings towards your wife and situation towards someone that has nothing to do with your situation. She has a heart and guilt and compassion just like you... I know for you it is burried deep down.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author scaredinlove Posted May 6, 2007 Author Share Posted May 6, 2007 SC... yet another example of you putting your feelings towards your wife and situation towards someone that has nothing to do with your situation. She has a heart and guilt and compassion just like you... I know for you it is burried deep down.. thanks, Priscilla I hope you are feeling better now. Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted May 6, 2007 Share Posted May 6, 2007 thanks, Priscilla I hope you are feeling better now. a little better...there are a few things in my life that I need to change! Link to post Share on other sites
Salicious Crumb Posted May 6, 2007 Share Posted May 6, 2007 She has a heart and guilt and compassion just like you.... So she shows her heart and compasion for this wife by f#cking her husband?.....uh.....ok Link to post Share on other sites
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