mandypandy Posted April 27, 2007 Share Posted April 27, 2007 i have been with my man for 3 1/2 years before i met him i didnt believe in god since i met him our lives have been blessed we moved away from home and nothing but good things have been happening for us we give back to god every chance we get well just recently my man has become more and more for god he spreads the word every where we go but last night he really blew my mind and made me have doubts about some of the things i believe now he said "in the old testament men of god had many wives and that he is a man of god and he feels that god has blessed him and told him that he should have two wives to spread the word" is that right?? like i said i didnt believe in god before so i dont know too much about this stuff but if thats true dosent it go against alot of things??? and if it says that i dont know if i believe as much as i thought i did because why would god want one man to divide his love between two women please help me i dont know what to do im so confused and i dont know if he is too because that just dosent sound right to me Link to post Share on other sites
lonelybird Posted April 27, 2007 Share Posted April 27, 2007 That is just so LAMB. NO, that's not true. In fact, in the Old Testament the man's first wife advised the man to have another woman because at that time the first wife can not have a child. it was his first wife UNBELIEF in God's promise which caused that the man had another woman. In the very beginning, God made one man and one woman to be a couple. and God wants the man loves his wife as love his own body. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted April 27, 2007 Share Posted April 27, 2007 sounds like he's selectively culling Scripture to justify his desires and/or behavior, and you don't need to put up with that kind of BS when you have a sneaky suspicion that it's wrong, wrong, WRONG!!! morally, he'd have a divided loyalty between two women; legally, bigamy is against the law; practically speaking, he'd have a time of it trying to make a three-way relationship work if there are actual feelings involved. I say he's trying to see how far he can push the boundaries. If anything, use common sense to whack him back into shape –*I know you've got a bit of a troubled relationship in the sense that you're together, but not actually "together," and he's finding ways to hurt you because of your life before you met him. put down your foot and tell him, "Either you're in a relationship with me, and only me, or you're not. What's it gonna be?" And don't back down or let your guard down – people only treat you as bad as you let them. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted April 27, 2007 Share Posted April 27, 2007 "in the old testament men of god had many wives and that he is a man of god and he feels that god has blessed him and told him that he should have two wives to spread the word"First off......tell him that he isn't in the position to consider HIMSELF a, "man of God". Secondly, the NEW testament says that even if he THINKS about another woman in that manner, he's comitting adultry. He's playing a very dangerous game here......he'll get burnt.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author mandypandy Posted April 27, 2007 Author Share Posted April 27, 2007 That is just so LAMB. NO, that's not true. In fact, in the Old Testament the man's first wife advised the man to have another woman because at that time the first wife can not have a child. it was his first wife UNBELIEF in God's promise which caused that the man had another woman. In the very beginning, God made one man and one woman to be a couple. and God wants the man loves his wife as love his own body. do you happen to know what scripture thats from??? Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted April 27, 2007 Share Posted April 27, 2007 It begins in Genesis Chapter 16. But I caution you, unless you know more scripture than your husband does, he can twist this around on you. You just need to put your foot down with him is all. You might lose him, but you don't want to be part of a harem either..... Link to post Share on other sites
Author mandypandy Posted April 27, 2007 Author Share Posted April 27, 2007 It begins in Genesis Chapter 16. But I caution you, unless you know more scripture than your husband does, he can twist this around on you. You just need to put your foot down with him is all. You might lose him, but you don't want to be part of a harem either..... omg i read it and i even read some foot notes telling how many people actualy live that way and believe it and it even says that god dosent condem it so am i just not understanding or am i totaly right for thinking its wrong see i use to always argue in the begining (when i did believe too much in god) that even though i think the bible is the word of god that man still wrote it and it could have been mis qouted (in some places) i mean i still think we should go by it but things like this make me think that way again its like yall said god put adam and eve on the earth to be a COUPLE ONE MAN AND ONE WOMAN so way would he contridict himself??? see this is all confusing me so much i mean IM NOT GOING TO DO IT but i do wanna be with him i just wish i could make him see that hes not "gods gift to me and another woman" (qouted by me just the way i feel he feels) i dont know i just think hes getting outta hand with this whole god thing am i wrong for that??? Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted April 27, 2007 Share Posted April 27, 2007 you probably have a healthy sense of right and wrong ... and what's bullpoop. Like what he's trying to peddle. think of it this way: Loving someone doesn't mean you should put up with things you know are wrong. And using "God said in the Bible that ..." is very much wrong because he's trying to justify future behavior. turn on your BS detector, and go from there! Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted April 27, 2007 Share Posted April 27, 2007 mandypandy, Please, keep in mind that you're reading from the OLD testament. This type of lifestyle is not what God has in mind for us in the here and now. You have to read scripture in light of scripture. You can't just read the Old Testament without knowing the New Testament, and vice versa..... This is a common mistake by alot of believers, and it WILL lead you astray. (which I think is happening to your husband)..... Link to post Share on other sites
amerikajin Posted April 27, 2007 Share Posted April 27, 2007 Better yet, f*** the scripture and just think for yourself. Life's a lot easier that way. Link to post Share on other sites
Topper Posted April 28, 2007 Share Posted April 28, 2007 In the old testament there are 45 polygamist mentioned. Among them are Abraham , Jacob ,Moses. King David and Solomon Salomon. In Deuteronomy there isa section on the laws of polygamy. These are laws handed down by God. Such as the first wife is to be treated as such. The 2nd wife is subject to her. The first wifes sons will be the first in line to inherit. There is also a provision that a man must marry his brothers wife if he should die before producing a male hair. Your husband is right in the Old testament there isn't any prohibition on Polygamy. None! In the time of Jesus Polygamy wasn't practised as it once was by Jews. Jesus himself never addressed the issue. Paul seems to put the idea of one man one wife out to the christian Followers. Yet even here there might be some Controversy. The Greek word used in Paul's letters could be interpreted in a couple of ways. The word for "one" can mean " One" or it could mean "First." So is he talking one wife or the first wife? Jews put a ban on polygamy in the 11Century. The great Christian reformer Martin Luther in his time, sanctioned some Polygamist marriages of one or two German Princes. There is a new Christian movement that claims that they have the right to polygamy. Of Course The Mormons use to practice polygamy. it is still Practised in Islam yet not as much as it once was. So your husband is right .That does not mean you have to live with this. If it is against your wishes and you are not happy, let him know. The Bible also says that Slavery is OK and even says you can beat your slave. Does something being in the Bible make it right? Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted April 28, 2007 Share Posted April 28, 2007 Better yet, f*** the scripture and just think for yourself. Life's a lot easier that way. Mandy if it is not something that you just don't want for yourself then you should not buy his BS... Ha same goes for you then you should be able to take another man. I would hope that you are not trying to justify his words by reading scriptures... Link to post Share on other sites
Curmudgeon Posted April 28, 2007 Share Posted April 28, 2007 My question would be, why would any man want more than one wife when sometimes it's difficult enough to maintain a healthy relationship with just one? On a more serious not, the scriptures can be twisted in many ways, especially when one has their own selfish reasons to do so. Likely as not he merely wants to try to legitimize sleeping with more than one woman at a time. For you I'd avise pulling up stakes and looking elsewhere for a truly good man. I doubt he fits that description. Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted April 28, 2007 Share Posted April 28, 2007 My question would be, why would any man want more than one wife when sometimes it's difficult enough to maintain a healthy relationship with just one? On a more serious not, the scriptures can be twisted in many ways, especially when one has their own selfish reasons to do so. Likely as not he merely wants to try to legitimize sleeping with more than one woman at a time. For you I'd avise pulling up stakes and looking elsewhere for a truly good man. I doubt he fits that description. BECAUSE HE IS A CHRISTIAN PLAYER...hiding behind the scriptures or what his perception of the bible is. Link to post Share on other sites
IpAncA Posted April 28, 2007 Share Posted April 28, 2007 What about many husbands? It's always the guy who gets all the girls. What about the other way around? Hmmmm.... Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 Is the OP writing some kind of avante-garde stream of consciousness prose? All I understood was her husband wants a second wife. Link to post Share on other sites
Topper Posted April 29, 2007 Share Posted April 29, 2007 Is the OP writing some kind of avante-garde stream of consciousness prose? All I understood was her husband wants a second wife. That is what she is saying. Her husband is useing the Old testament law as a justification to become a Polygamist. Most people can find what they want in the Bible to justify just about anything. Including Murder, Rape, infanticide, and yes even abortion. There is a recipe in the bible fora potion that Temple priest could give to a woman to see if she was in fact carrying her husbands baby. If the Baby was still born that was proof the baby was born from sin. If she had a full term healthy delivery., that meant it was her husbands baby. There is also passage after passage on Gods sanctioning of Slavery. Just because something is in the Bible does not make it right or Holy. Sorry people but this is more proof that the Bible isa flawed document. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 So your husband is right .No he is not right if you read the entire Bible.The Bible also says that Slavery is OK and even says you can beat your slave.No it does not, again, you need to read the entire Bible. Non believers often say that Christians pick and choose Scripture that would most benefits our purposes. YOU seem to be ATTEMPTING to do the same. Most people can find what they want in the Bible to justify just about anything. Most people with more than 3 brain cells would read the entire Bible before jumping to conclusions about what's justifyable or not.Your husband is right in the Old testament there isn't any prohibition on Polygamy. None! Before the fall there was one man, and one woman. Adam and Eve, not Adam, Eve 1, Eve 2, Eve 3, Eve 4, Eve 5......... I'm so tired of trying to explain this to you, (and some others). You simply ignore me because it debunks everything you stand for.....you cannot just read chapter one and claim you've finished the book. Taking what you know about the Old Testament without applying what is revealed in the NEW Testament is like reading a book halfway and putting it down. AND, you mislead people. I don't care if you choose to mislead yourself, but for crying out loud.....QUIT claiming that which you know NOTHING about. OR at the very least, claim these as your OPINIONS and not FACT. :mad: Luke 16:18 Matthew 5:27 James 2:11 Are just SOME examples of how, (in my opinion), WRONG, wrong, wrong you are. Link to post Share on other sites
Topper Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Moose I have read the Bible. I have read it in the context of the times and with an understanding of the people who wrote the Bible. I don't just read the sections that support one position or the other. just a look at Deuteronomy 21:15-17 isa clearly about Polygamy Exodus21:10 another passage Passages in Deuteronomy also give clear instructions on how a Slave is to be treated. There are more concerning the practise of Levirate marriage. Some here believe that every word in the Bible is from God. I do not. I am attempting to point out the flaws in a flew Book. You can put any spin you want on it. The fact remains the commandments from God are there in the Bible. Laws given to Moses by God. Polygamy, Incest , Murder, Rape, Genocide are all part of the Bible and often commanded by God. In the Torah there is a another version of the Garden of Eden in that version Adem has wife named Lilith, Adam was unhappy with Lilith so god gave him Eve. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Moose I have read the Bible.If you had, then you'd know that everything you're pulling from the Old Testament has been changed by the New Testament. Yet, you keep trying, (key word is trying), to prove your point by pulling only the Scripture out that support your arguement. I'm not saying that polygamy didn't exist, or that it never happened, or even that God didn't accept it. What I am saying is He does not accept it now. Not since Christ came and put the old laws to rest. THE NEW TESTAMENT SAYS: Hebrews 13:4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. Why would anyone want to have 2 wives, but to have another piece of tail in bed with him? The OP's husband is using the excuse, "to spread God's word"......oh puhhleeeeeze!! In regards to how to treat slaves / servants: Ephesians 6:9 And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him. Colossians 4:1 Masters, provide your slaves with what is right and fair, because you know that you also have a Master in heaven. I don't just read the sections that support one position or the other.I just proved that you do. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 I just proved that you do.I should've said, alot of people do instead singling you out. But I do think you shouldn't leave out New Testament Scripture and tell the OP that her husband is right......it's simply not true enlight of Scripture.... Link to post Share on other sites
Topper Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Either the Bible is the word of God or it isn't. You can't have it both ways. Christians use the parts of the Old testament that support their position. They then and dismiss those portions that they find inconvenient. The dismissal is always the same. Jesus brought a new convenience. So why does the Christian Bible even have an Old Testament? Is this Book the pure word of God or not? Didn't Jesus say he was not here to change the laws of Moses but to ad to the laws? Levirate marriage is spelled out and very clear. It is not a suggestion by God it is commanded by God. A Mans whose Brother has died before his wife has conceived must marry his sister in law, and produce a child with her. That is Gods law. I did not make these things up they are there in the Bible You even gave me ammo with those passages on how to treart your slaves. It doe not say thou shall not commit your brother to Slavery It says you better be a good slave master. Link to post Share on other sites
Moose Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Either the Bible is the word of God or it isn't. You can't have it both ways.Topper, you're saying you're well versed in the Bible......how are you then coming up with such hog wash? The Bible is the Word through and through. I believe that whole heartedly. So where do you come up with that I don't? Didn't Jesus say he was not here to change the laws of Moses but to ad to the laws? For the last time, the Old Testament was written for the people of that time before Christ came to FULFILL the law, not, "add" to it...... All the laws and decrees in the Old Testament where placed for the fundamental reason of pleasing God. They were hard to follow, they had to be precisely carried out, and hardly ANY of them can be followed in today's day and age!So why does the Christian Bible even have an Old Testament?We use the Old Testament for many reasons. Lineage, history, prophecy....Jesus brought a new convenience.Not a new, "convenience", a new COVENANT: Hebrews 8:6-13 6 But the ministry Jesus has received is as superior to theirs as the covenant of which he is mediator is superior to the old one, and it is founded on better promises. 7 For if there had been nothing wrong with that first covenant, no place would have been sought for another. 8 But God found fault with the people and said: "The time is coming, declares the Lord, when I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel and with the house of Judah. 9 It will not be like the covenant I made with their forefathers when I took them by the hand to lead them out of Egypt, because they did not remain faithful to my covenant, and I turned away from them, declares the Lord. 10 This is the covenant I will make with the house of Israel after that time, declares the Lord. I will put my laws in their minds and write them on their hearts. I will be their God, and they will be my people. 11 No longer will a man teach his neighbor, or a man his brother, saying, 'Know the Lord,' because they will all know me, from the least of them to the greatest. 12 For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more." 13 By calling this covenant "new," he has made the first one obsolete; and what is obsolete and aging will soon disappear.Levirate marriage is spelled out and very clear. It is not a suggestion by God it is commanded by God.Only because at that point and time, they were a DYING race.....jeeeeezzz...... That is Gods law.That WAS God's law at THAT time.....I did not make these things up they are there in the Bible No kidding! It doe not say thou shall not commit your brother to Slavery It says you better be a good slave master.Oh for PETE'S Sake! Slave Master, Supervisor, Boss, Manager......Officer.....that passage applies to ANYONE in a position of leadership......jeeeezzz give it up man! Link to post Share on other sites
Geishawhelk Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 Anyone want to discuss polyamory....? Where each partner can have multiple partners, but they aren't shared by the other partner...? So the "wife" can have 1/2/3 other men in her life, the "husband" can have 1/2/3 other women in his life....but there's no group sex, and it's all agreed? Anything to get back on topic..... http://www.polyamory.org/ Link to post Share on other sites
lonelybird Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Why can't a man only love one woman? Hoolywood movie sucks, just opposite to reality Link to post Share on other sites
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