Jealous

[ashposer10]

my boyfriend just moved 2 hours away to play baseball at FSU and being who I am....I'm very worried that girls are going to be all over him. I could be one of the most jealous girls ever and even though I know I don't need to be I can't help it and it tears me apart. Seeing how this is the first time we have been more then 10 minutes from each other I don't want to mess things up by acting jealous and upsetting him. He tells me I have nothing to worry about and I believe him but has anyone been in this situation?....And advice of how I can get over the jealously and actually act normal with him?

[HokeyReligions]

You just have to be strong and make yourself act the way you normally would. Telling him that you feel a little jealous can be flattering, but consistently telling him you are worried will send a message that you don't trust him. If you DO trust him then remind yourself of that often.

 

Shortly after my husband and I were engaged he got a long-term job about 3 hours away - in a college town. He was surrounded by college girls for months. I was a little jealous too and worried that he might be tempted, but I told myself that I trusted him and that of course he would be tempted -- he is only human, but acting on the temptation or even putting himself in a situation where he had opportunity, just wasn't like him. I knew he loved me and would not do that. When we did see each other he was VERY affectionate with me, and when we would talk on the phone the conversations were brief, but we said what we wanted to say. Talked about movies or "old times" or what we would do together when he got back--things like that. I might tell him something cute the dogs did, or he would tell me a joke he heard at work.

[Ally Boo]

Has he ever given you a reason to be jealous? If not, I think you might be over-reacting. Don't let past relationships, or your fears get in the way of happiness. Jealous does not bring two people together...it tears them apart...especially if its unjustified.

[ashposer10]

No he has never given me a reason to be jealous. We did break up briefly this summer and he dated another girl and that just made me rage with jealously even to this day thinking about her but I just need to let that go because we were not together and he would never do anything to me worry or anything. I do trust him very much and yes I think I will tell him that more often. But when I tell him I get jealous and just laughs at me and tells me it's the dumbest thing to think about with him.

[Kat]

Sometimes being jealous becomes a habit instead of a feeling.

 

You just have to take a deep breath and realise that it is just your body on auto-pilot and that it isn't in anythint but your head.

 

Of course people can always hurt you, but that is what love is.

Love him, Trust him, and take his work over any other. But don't be stupid!

 

From what you say you have no reason to worry, but I you sound just like me, so I know you will. Good luck honey, it is ok to worry about your b/f running off with someone else, but not if it takes over your life. Remember he is with you, and he has chosen to be with you, and stay with you.

[ashposer10]

Thank you so much that is great advice and really makes me feel much better to know I'm not the only one with this jealous habit.

[Jamie31]

Listen girl!! If he wants to cheat he will do it even if he's only ten minutes away. He chooses to be with you, you are not forcing him. Girls may flirt with him and that's only natural but you have to trust him to say I am in a relationship. You can't say no guys flirt or hit on you. Do you cheat ---- NO. You say I have a boyfriend. So don't worry. I am in a relationship and fixing to be married and I am off at school. We are fine and still have a loving, trusting relationship. So stop tearing yourself apart that will just get you down and can lead to health problems. Trust him and your relationship.