23 years later we finally found each other

[delfina]

I'm struggling with this man. We were a couple for a few months when we went to the same college, over 20 years ago. What was unusual about him is that he remained my friend after our relationship ended. That's really unusual, at least in my experience. We found each other finally on one of those class reunion type websites.

 

We have been inseparable...well technologically speaking...since we found each other a month ago. E-mails, chat, chat with microphones, phone calls, some mail. He is so much more emotionally available than he was back then and it is much easier to be open with him. We have talked about meeting, then living together and have both hinted about marriage. We are both in the U.S. but 1650 miles apart.

 

When things get close emotionally, he sometimes makes really stupid jokes to break the tension. I just want to strangle him. I know he is just afraid of some of the emotion, but man it really pisses me off.

 

What do I like about him? Well he loves me. He has trusted me with very personal stuff, more than ever in the past. And he didn't have the guts to tell me he loved me 20 years ago. However now he is one of those guys who won't tell you every day...like it is just too much for him. We have talked all about failed relationships we've had since then and it has been really helpful in understanding each other.

 

The more I write this the more it sounds like I am just too frustrated. I would like it to work out with him but don't know if he has the balls to do it, no matter how much he wants to be with me.

 

Suggestions?

[delfina]

Do you have anything to say about my situation? It has cooled off a bit in the past week because his modem died, and it'll be a while before he gets a new one. Does anyone have experience, even if it happened to someone you know, about people reconnecting after so long? Thanks in advance for your replies.