mikesherry22 Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Hi everyone, First off, great forum weve got here...its a really great support network, and Im grateful to have found it. Here is my situation with my ex as it is now: We have been broken up for about 2 months. We were together for a year and a half (although I had to be away from her for about 6 months) We maintained a very strong relationship even when I was gone..and we were there for eachother in the ups and downs. I was the one that started to distance myself from her, get interested in seeing other people and to basically end it. I know that she cried a lot, and was probably very hurt. At the time, it seemed like the right thing to do...and I was fine for a few weeks. Then, a few weeks after the break, I realized what a great and amazing person I had let slip out of my life, and begun to try and win her back (did not work, although we hooked up a few times physically, of course) Right after we ended things, I was dating someone else, and when she got wind of that, she jumped to "kind of see" a guy that had been after her and flirting with her while we were together...although she had rejected him during those times because our relationship was her priority. So, this seems to be an obvious rebound, right? He was nearby, and giving her attention I guess...and I imagine that I left a pretty big hole-vacuum in her life...makes sense from a logical point of view anyway So- I realized that after a week or so of contact, trying to get her back, some hooking up, that I was starting to feel pretty hurt, and I came to my senses and started no contact. I didnt tell her, I just started moving on with things in my life, not calling her...changed my gym schedule so I wouldnt see her, etc. All good. I have been no contact with her for maybe 3-4 weeks or so. In that time, she called me once on the cell to see how I was...I said fine, etc..it was short and sweet. Then, I ran into her at the gym, but we just briefly spoke...and she wrote me an email the next day telling me how nice it was to see me...that I am doing well etc. I didnt write back (no contact). 2 weeks later...I have a lot of things going on...music projects...a new apartment, gigs, and have even met a new interesting girl, weve been out a few times, but nothing has happened yet except for some good chemistry and good conversations. Ran into ex at the gym today, and felt a lot less of an emotional reaction (a good thing!...I think this means I have been healing and moving on) I was pleasant, said hello...and continued my excersise. Later in the afternoon...I realizxed that I was feeling good and strong...and decided to break NC for LC...because I hadnt responded to her last email...just gave her a quick call..nice to see you at the gym, things going well...hope you are well...take care...and ended it. Unfortunately...she was pretty cold and guarded on the phone (obvious)...although this didnt get to me too much as my life is staying pretty full thanks to what I have learned about healing and moving on...had I not been able to handle this...I would not have called. Anyway...I am going to keep NC-LC going and continue to move forward. Any thoughts or inspiration from any of you out there? I think that I am handling this well...although we both have broke NC a few times in the past few weeks. For full disclosure...I still have strong feelings for this person and the connection that we shared...and I would imagine that she does too...I dont think that deep love can just be "turned off"...although I know that things do get weird and can go hot and cold after a break up. Anyway...I want to keep healing and moving forward...with a possibility at a future connection with her.... So, am I doing the right things? I mean, I know that I initiated the break, but when I tried to go back, I felt rejected, etc etc. So, hope this all makes sense...I would respect and appreciate any of your input on this...and I look forward to meeting some of you on this helpful and supportive message board! take good care...a big hug to all mike Link to post Share on other sites
littlexemoxpenguin Posted April 30, 2007 Share Posted April 30, 2007 Well.. I just wish you the best of luck. breakups are ****. :\ Link to post Share on other sites
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