Meggedy Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 Okay, I admit it, I snooped. I did a bad thing. Not good. What I found was worse. There have been little signs lately - smells, strange, stilted phone conversations - and I snooped. I take full responsibility for snooping. Not a good move. I went through his txt messages and found a txt to a girl saying, "How bout that blow job you wanted to give me last night?" Then others a couple days later making plans to go out that night. This is eating me up. Do I confront him about this - and admit I snooped? Or let it lie, since I shouldn't have been looking anyways? I should mention that I really, really am in love with this guy, and I'm strong enough to break it off, but it would freaking HURT. What do I do? Link to post Share on other sites
2sunny Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 unless you want a whole life ahead of you like this - break it off. without telling him why - he deserves no explanation. Link to post Share on other sites
ash519 Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 WOAH! I would LOSE It!!! #1, he was obviously with another girl who wanted to blow him and #2 he has her phone number and wanted to take her up on her offer. Do you want to be with a man like that? This guy is doing you a favor...he is giving you a chance to go find someone who doesnt want blow jobs from other girls. EEW! I'd be so mad! I know you love him and it is so hard, but really, can you trust him now? Link to post Share on other sites
Lizzie60 Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 Okay, I admit it, I snooped. I did a bad thing. Not good. What I found was worse. There have been little signs lately - smells, strange, stilted phone conversations - and I snooped. I take full responsibility for snooping. Not a good move. I went through his txt messages and found a txt to a girl saying, "How bout that blow job you wanted to give me last night?" Then others a couple days later making plans to go out that night. This is eating me up. Do I confront him about this - and admit I snooped? Or let it lie, since I shouldn't have been looking anyways? I should mention that I really, really am in love with this guy, and I'm strong enough to break it off, but it would freaking HURT. What do I do? Hum... my guess is that you are very 'dependant' of that guy... come on! be independant, strong... leave him. I can't believe you're feeling guilty now!!!! OH yeah...you really really love this guy...but HE doesn't love you! He's a player... It will hurt one way or the other, trust me... at least, you'll be the ONE to say: Enough is enough jerk!!! No need for explanation, he will LIE, LIE, LIE anyway and you'll get weak and will let him manipulate you... Give your head a shake girl!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
dropdeadlegs Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 Once you know something, it's hard not to "know" it. I don't think I would be able to pretend that I hadn't looked at his text log. Love isn't something you can turn off with the flick of an internal switch for most people, and if you could I would have to question whether it was really love that you were feeling. That brings up the question. How long could you love him if he is actually engaging in this type of behavior? Even texting of this kind would be so hurtful to me, but there are women who turn a blind eye to cheating in the name of love for their SO. I would fess up to the snooping, explain that you felt something was "different" in the relationship, and then take a break from each other. If he feels the need for that kind of attention from another woman, I would assume that he must not be happy with me. That might break my heart, but I couldn't overlook it because I got the information in the wrong way. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 Yes, I would admit to snooping too and then dump him. His knee jerk defense will be to focus on how evil and nasty you are for snooping through his cell phone. The best defense is a good offense. Don't let him pull this on you because I can see that you already feel badly about doing it. This guy is obviously cheating on you. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 Yes, I would admit to snooping too and then dump him. His knee jerk defense will be to focus on how evil and nasty you are for snooping through his cell phone. The best defense is a good offense. Don't let him pull this on you because I can see that you already feel badly about doing it. This guy is obviously cheating on you. I agree with TBF.. Meggedy dump his cheating ass.. snooping or not won't change the fact that he is getting sex from another girl.. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 Just break up with him. Tell him that you know he's cheating on you. If he says he isn't, just say "Do you think I'm that stupid???" Not sure how long you've been with him, but ask yourself this...IS the relationship worth saving??? IS he worth fighting for?? Link to post Share on other sites
megnog Posted May 1, 2007 Share Posted May 1, 2007 wait wait wait!!!! how the HELL are you going to feel bad about snooping when you found something like THIS?!!?!? holy crap i give you props for not freaking the F out and doing something crazy. not only is he being offered blow jobs by other women, he is flirting and saying he wants it . how can you still be in love? i would feel sick to my stomach, probably puke, and then key his car lol you must be real strong. nevertheless, GET RID OF HIM. sooooooo not worth the pain that will present itself. and do tell him... "you can go get that blowjob now, because WE ARE OVER!!!" lol maybe a little less dramatic. idk... good luck Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 how can you still be in love? i would feel sick to my stomach, probably puke Her mind may HATE him, but her heart, well that's a different story. It's not so easy just to turn those feelings off, even though he's done something so wrong and deserves to be dumped. Link to post Share on other sites
silentcharon Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 What if the guy was joking? was there any texts back from the girl? Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 What if the guy was joking? was there any texts back from the girl? See below... There have been little signs lately - smells, strange, stilted phone conversations Link to post Share on other sites
nittygritty Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Maybe he wanted to get caught. Why would he leave his phone when he was waiting for an answer to a text like that? It doesn't really matter that you had to snoop to confirm your suspicions. You caught him so what are you going to do about it? It doesn't sound like your handling it very well when your first reaction to your discovery is to blame yourself for snooping??? Come on, you didn't cause it and you can't cure it so dump him immediately! No explanation is needed, he will know why. Quit worrying about his reaction, he already has a spare girlfriend to worry about him and you know she's getting a cheater, so his feelings and issues are no longer your problem. Getting your self esteem back up after being with a guy like this is what you need to be working on. Just because you love somebody doesn't mean that you should waste the one life you were given by being destroyed by a person who is not capable of loving you back. What will this guy have to do before you dump him? Where do you draw the line? Link to post Share on other sites
Miss_Bee Posted May 2, 2007 Share Posted May 2, 2007 Just break up with him, and leave him wondering why you did. He doesn't deserve an explanation. I wouldn't take a second glance at him if i were you. Before you go, poop in his shoes. Link to post Share on other sites
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