marlena Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 Careful what you which for! You just might get it! I got my second, well, third chance (some people just can't get things thru their thick skulls) with my ex! We have started seeing eachother two or three times a week and calling eachother on a daily basis! For us it wasn't the NC rule but LC instead! There was no pleading, no stalking, no negotiating! Everything was kept on a friendly and casual basis,very civil and polite, for slightly over a month. When we see eachother we do not talk about the relationship and its problematic areas. We keep it light as if starting from scratch again. We simply have fun talking most of the time. We have not even attempted to sleep with another yet (that was one of the HUGE problems to begin with)! So what have I gained? What have I got? Back to where we always were. The issues are still there, remaining unsolved,just festering, waiting I'm sure to explode one day! Are second /third/fourth chances such a good thing after all? Link to post Share on other sites
melodymatters Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 Thats a good point and a good post ! Depending on what the issues were, and if it is basically a personality conflict, what is going to make it better THIS time ? I used to always go back to ex's. Now I don't because its the same old shyte, different day. Good luck in your situation and don't be afraid to walk away if it looks like a reheated, repeat of the original crap ! Think back 2 or 3 BF's aren't you glad THOSE ended ? I don't pine for ANY of my ex's. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted May 5, 2007 Share Posted May 5, 2007 It sounds like a friendship although you can't be friends with someone you have strong feelings for. Take a step back because your issues can't be resolved due to his dysfunction. If and when you honestly get over him, this is when potential friendship might be possible. Link to post Share on other sites
Author marlena Posted May 5, 2007 Author Share Posted May 5, 2007 ThanksTby F, I know that a friendship isn't possible since I obviously continue to have feelings for him. Still, my feelings have altered considerably. They are not as intense as they used to be. Furthermore, I just don't care that much anymore either. He has lost a lot of the power he had over me. I see the real man now and not the man I thought I was seeing then. I know him/us better now and so have few, if any, expectations. I also know the limitations of what the two of us together can achieve. That's why I haven't addressed any issues yet...don't know if I ever will. For the time being I am just accepting what is ..going with the flow... MM, Thanks for wishing me luck and no, I won't hesitate to walk away if it begins to look like a re-run of a flick I didn't like much in the first place (though the actor was gorgeous)!!!! I don't pine for any of my ex's! Thank God for small miracles, huh? Link to post Share on other sites
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