Author AaliyaA Posted January 13, 2003 Author Share Posted January 13, 2003 Hello Ally Boo and Kat, This is the way I see it. I don't mind receiving advice... good or bad and I do appreciate it. But I think both of you are COMPLETELY missing my point. When you give advice can you please state it in a logical and clear manner without using harsh terms or making short and rude statements and not elaborating on it. I think that the way you gals respoond is DISRESPECTFUL and IMMATURE. Because I am simply asking you all to word your advice better... I mean whats wrong with that?!?!? I hope when you two respond again that you will address the real issue that I have just stated here instead of making it seem like I don't like receiving advice, which is false. Because again its how the advice is delivered and packaged that makes a difference. And I don't see where I belittled anybody here, if I did then please quote it for me and I will apologize if I agree. At least I am open and willing to see my mistakes and apologize for it, but the two of you seem to be so stubborn that you won't even accept the fact that you could have possibly been wrong. For the record my guy has been calling me all the time and on time ever since we had the talk. I now never have to call him - hee hee I told him in such a way, which made him feel really bad. I did so without sounding like a nag. So here is proof that the way you say things make a difference. I delivered my message so good that I totally got through to him and thats what everyone should do. So my final words for you all to remember me by is that: "IT'S NOT ONLY WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY, BUT IT'S HOW YOU SAY IT". Laterz, AaliyaA Link to post Share on other sites
Ally Boo Posted January 13, 2003 Share Posted January 13, 2003 Originally posted by AaliyaA So here is proof that the way you say things make a difference... So my final words for you all to remember me by is that: "IT'S NOT ONLY WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY, BUT IT'S HOW YOU SAY IT". I think that if you would have followed your own revelation this entire time, no one would feel insulted. That's all I have to say on this. Glad things are working out for you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author AaliyaA Posted January 13, 2003 Author Share Posted January 13, 2003 Hello Ally Boo, That was a quick response. Anyways thanks for the good luck. And I still don't see how I was wrong at all, but whatever lets just say that we will BOTH keep my words in mind for future reference and move on. Take care, AaliyaA Link to post Share on other sites
Ally Boo Posted January 13, 2003 Share Posted January 13, 2003 We only have so much energy in one given day, and I'm not going to waste anymore energy negatively on your posts. I'm sorry that you don't see where you got defensive and rude with people that were trying to help you. I'm from the south, and maybe it's a cultural thing...but seeing as how a lady from Australia is in agreement with me, I don't think that is the case. At any rate, Kat was right in that your tone is to defend these people whose behavior you originally questioned. And it is my opinion that if you are going to defend anything that is said on the subject....why post in the first place? I find that strange. And while we are on my opinions, I would say that that change in behavior and attitude you have displayed throughout this thread, leads me to believe that you have no self esteem and would do anything for the attention of a male. Perhaps you could consider seeing a very good therapist to help you with this. You are not alone in this. There are many females who feel this way, and it usually stems from the lack of attention from a father figure while she was growing up. It is also the lead cause in why women put up with abuse from the men in their life...be it physical, mental, emotional, etc. The only reason I have continued to post in this thread is because your attitude about letting this guy play games with you, disturbs me and has me concerned for you. Those concerns have made you defensive...and since you wanted an example.... I said that your man's excuse for not calling you to "keep you on your toes" is insane. And it IS insane...or just a REALLY bad excuse. You immediately replied by saying that I was insane. Then said that we have made this thread into a judgment session. I said that the concept was insane...you said that I was insane. Who is doing the judging here? I'm sure your intentions were not malicious in nature, but you felt threatened by our comments, and then attacked us. I never said that I WASN'T happy for you. If you are happy, that's great! There are many people who go through life NEVER finding happiness. But there are just as many people that go through life, letting people push them around. By reading your posts, I felt that you were being pushed around, and I was doing my duty, as a member of this forum, to bring that to your attention...because many times it takes someone else to help us see what we can't see. You don't want to see anything that I have to say, and I completely understand. I'm not the most educated person on this board, I don't have all the answers, and I will never claim to, but when I see a behavior that needs to be addressed, I will do so...just so that I know I did what I could to help another person. I'm sure you will feel like you need to respond, bc you are probably defensive again. But I just want you to know that any future posts will be "Marked as Read" and that I refuse to discuss this any further. I just wanted you to understand my intentions. My well wishes remain... Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted January 13, 2003 Share Posted January 13, 2003 For the record my guy has been calling me all the time and on time ever since we had the talk. I now never have to call him - hee hee That's really great, but it's been what, two or three days? Come back in a month and let us know if he's still doing this. I tend to think that old habits die hard, and that he will eventually start wanting to "keep you on your toes" again. But that's just my opinion. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts