How do men handle jealousy?

[LoveLace]

Do they hide it as much as possible? What if a guy asks me about if another guy is my boyfriend? A guy i've known many years...but either way, is it out of feelings/jealousy, or just a friendly question? Wouldn't a guy not even ask if he didn't care?

[Lizzie60]

Do they hide it as much as possible? What if a guy asks me about if another guy is my boyfriend? A guy i've known many years...but either way, is it out of feelings/jealousy, or just a friendly question? Wouldn't a guy not even ask if he didn't care?

 

Some men are just curious... they don't necessarily care or being jealous, IMO. It all depends on the situation, the look on his face when he asks the question... it's hard to say.

[Enema]

I think your situation is different considering your history with the guy.

 

But, Lizzie is on the money.

[Green]

if when he masturbates he imagines he is the guy doing you, then yes he is probably jelouse to have asked that question. Good luck finding out if thats the case. What goes on in the mind of men is sometimes dark and disturbing, he might only think of you as a butter face and want to do you dogie style

[silentcharon]

Yes, I think it's jealousy. Kinda the same way it happened to me with my ex, except we had broken up, and a guy asked him if I was dating someone else, know what my ex said? He said "Kind of. Me." :mad::mad::sick::sick: I was beyond pissed, my ex did that out of pure sheer jealousy.

[LoveLace]

if when he masturbates he imagines he is the guy doing you, then yes he is probably jelouse to have asked that question. Good luck finding out if thats the case. What goes on in the mind of men is sometimes dark and disturbing, he might only think of you as a butter face and want to do you dogie style

 

 

I've noticed that if I'm dressed up or just looking "nice", a little sexy, whatever- it seems like he has trouble looking me in the eye...in my younger days he probably didn't see me as the independent, sophisticated, attractive grown woman that I am now. By the way, we are roommates! I've talked about guys before and he's never asked if one of them was my "boyfriend"...in fact he's never asked about them at all. I was talking about the guy while on the phone with a friend, and after I hung up he asked if that was my boyfriend I talked about. I was caught off guard, so I just said, "uh-whatever ya wanna call it-"...stupid! I should have said no!

[Not_That_Innocent]

I think men exhibit jealousy by acting possessive/territorial.

[LoveLace]

I think men exhibit jealousy by acting possessive/territorial.

 

True; I know women who have acted that way too, though, including myself! I think it can come in different forms. It could be the cold shoulder, asking questions, or like you said, possessive/territorial which is the more extreme one I think. I'd say I'm guilty of all three at some point in life. My RM asking me about the boyfriend could have been friendly conversation, but out of the ordinary for him, and I've never asked about any girl he's been on the phone with. If he talks about them, it's without my asking. He isn't the type to be possessive, I know for a fact...so he has to express his jealousy in some way...if I sound like I want him to be jealous, that's because I do. But I don't go to extremes to try and make him feel that way. I have refused to play that game this whole time. So maybe he is finally starting to get jealous all on his own.

 

One particular Saturday night was dateless for me, and the RM was off work, so we hung out a little, then he said he was going to see about a girl. I said, "Aw i'm jealous"...because he had a date and i didn't. Then he said, "Oh..well..maybe not.."- and said he'd be back shortly. I got comfy on the couch with a movie. He only returned an hour or so later and said "well, i guess we're in the same boat". Then he joined me for movies and seemed enthusiastic about the whole thing, wasn't disappointed over any girl. Things always go over my head so it wasn't until much later before I realized, he thought I meant jealous over the girl! It looked a bit like he came back just to hang with me...only one of several things that I missed and didn't take advantage of. Now, the relationship is a bit awkward because there are only 3 months left of us living together. Can't put my finger on it, but there's something in the atmosphere...and now we're both stressing because we did this to help each other financially, but now we'll both be back to doing it alone. I don't think either of us want to bother with finding a new roommate. It's almost ridiculous for us to end it when we really still need each other.

 

But jealousy is all thats truthfully driving me out. It gets hard to be patient with him having girls over. But I've never admitted it. Especially with getting closer to his kids, and trying to be the sensible adult and cool roommate at the same time. He thinks this whole deal is ending because I'm too distracted by his kids. Then I get my grades from nursing school and I got 2 b's and an A. So apparently, studying isn't a problem for me! I feel ready to talk about my feelings, yet I keep driving myself into the ground looking for clues as to how he feels about me. You know the book, "he's Not That Into You", yea I've heard of it. But I'm the opposite..I usually lose guys because I figure out that they were into me more than I ever knew. I've brushed off so many positive signals over the years, that I guess I try not to do that anymore.

 

Tonight I found out from a friend that my RM has tickets to the baseball game tomorrow, and I was going to ask him to go to the carnival with me tomorrow. I'm disappointed but I texted him, "I'm jealous! have fun tomorrow". And I'm sure a date is involved there. sigh.