How can I tell if she's interested?

[echoloco]

Hi newbie here ,

 

I have a relative old question but I haven't found an answer that seems to work for me. Most answers are of the sort: "look for her tilting her head while she fixes her hair", "if she touches you then she's interested", etc. I'm more interested in actually attitude cues.

 

I'd like to give you a bit more background since it might help answer my question. It's going to be long so if you don't want to read through all of this I would still like any tips you could give.

 

I have this friend, lets call here Rebecca, that I met back in university together with another girl I was actually interested in at that time. When I met Rebecca she had a boyfriend and as I mentioned I was trying to go out with her friend. Rebecca's friend wasn't interested in me and she only wanted my friendship.

 

Three or four month later Rebecca ended her relationship with her boyfriend and her friend told her what about me. So Rebecca called me and asked me if I was interested in her friend and I said yes, so I basically killed my chances with her then.

 

After that we didn't talk to each other. I then went to a different country, we lost contact except through MSN were we had each other as contacts but didn't actually talk.

 

Now almost 10 years later we met each other at a funeral and we had a small chat there and started talking again over MSN. Lately we've gone out as friends to a wine tasting event. She invited me and my friends over to her house to play poker with her friends. We went out to a bar with friends and she and I stayed there talking until they kicked us out.

 

Now we talk to each other each day on MSN about relationships, work, everything. I compliment her and she takes them well. She shares her family news with me and we generally make each other laugh.

 

However, recently during one of our chats she mentioned she wasn't looking to be in a relationship at the moment. I know this should give me a clue but I'm not good at interpreting girl signs/language.

 

I'm starting to go head over heels for her, she's smart, funny, successful, gorgeous and I feel like a loser for not being able to read signs correctly.

 

How can I tell if I have a chance with her?

 

Help!

[monkey00]

Im confused is the girl that you like Rebecca or her friend?

 

Usually when women use womanese for "im not looking for a relationship at the moment", its true. However that also implies a possible relationship can arise if/when the right guy comes along, it could be today, tomorrow, etc.

 

From the sounds of it you're in the zone, its not always a bad thing. But dont forget being in the zone also means you're in the backburner. who knows maybe she's waiting for you to make your move...if given the right incentive/situation women can easily change their minds as quickly as they make up their minds.

[echoloco]

Hi Monkey00,

 

Thank you for your reply.

 

Im confused is the girl that you like Rebecca or her friend?

 

The girl I like is Rebecca, but at first I was trying to date her friend.

 

Usually when women use womanese for "im not looking for a relationship at the moment", its true. However that also implies a possible relationship can arise if/when the right guy comes along, it could be today, tomorrow, etc.

 

From the sounds of it you're in the zone, its not always a bad thing. But dont forget being in the zone also means you're in the backburner. who knows maybe she's waiting for you to make your move...if given the right incentive/situation women can easily change their minds as quickly as they make up their minds.

 

So basically because I suck at reading women's signs I'll screw myself since I probably won't notice where I stand with her.

[monkey00]

So basically because I suck at reading women's signs I'll screw myself since I probably won't notice where I stand with her.

 

Well no need to put it that way. (Try to date other women and) be less available, through this way you can gauge her true interest level in you - not only that but it helps to escape the zone.

 

Or, if given the right moment make a move and see what happens.