In general what are ways to ger you ex back?

[LucasSoLost]

Now that i know the basics could someone personally help me.

first of all my ex broke up with me a week ago. She gets angry easy is really controlling and possesive. she gets mad and swears at me and bishes for 5min then she says sorry and feels like crap. the thing is her best friend thinks im cute i guess. so she made me promise not to talk to her which i was fine with. we all play this game called maple story which is really dumb i played it because i got depressed a year ago then me and her met over it and we found out we both live in hawaii and we kinda liked each others personality so we got together and took it from there. the thing is in this game u can have like ur little gf bf thing like its weird but u get married in it and w/e and u get rings to make it like ur bf and gf. so before i met her she had this bf in it whos from france and is obsessed with her its really weird like there good good friends though well he loves her hes crazy even calls her. she told me like she hates it because she let it go to far with him and she cant break up with him because he would seriously hurt himself. so basically she likes him as a super close friend like loves him as a friend but hes like all weird one time i talked to him as a friend. he told me like oo me and her are going to meet up when she comes to france and i asked her about it she said yeah i was going to france after i grad but this was before i met you. she also said she was just gonna meet him. her brother was taking her for graduation because she takes took french in school as do i. so he like sees some future in this. soo when he logs on the game and if im not with her or haning out with her she hangs out with him and she likes to make me jealous spamming things like ''ilove you'' or ''hi honey<3'' yeah its anooying and i get in a bad mood. then she gets all mad because i am and ignores me. so this brings me to her best friend. in the game we all hang out and my gf has a lot of people that like her in the game. so a lot of people are always coming to her. so she talks to them and her friends there so we talk she gets all mad because i talked to her friend. so that happened a few times then in real life we went to the mall she was trying to get her friend to flirt with me and it was obvious she was doing it so i was like okay u dont trust me now ur really not gonna dna i flirted with her. she kept telling me things like o go hold her hand. then she had to leave early so her friend asked me oo lucas can u wait with me. i kinda mumbled and said umm idk dont think i can and looked over at my gf she looked fine so i said oo alright sure. so then i got a text msg saying lets just be friends=]. i was like o wtf called her up talked to her and argued a bit said hey look u asked her to flirt with me i know what u were doing. so that was her st time breaking up with me. then i texted her asking for another chance. she said no then later that night called missing me. so now to the final break up. one day on maple story that game she was ignoring me because of that guy. it was late at night and i had no friends online so i msged her best friend and said i miss her hoping she would tell her and she would realize how means shes being ignoring me for this guy. most girls would think its sweet well i thought. so 2days later she said so u were talking to her again i said yah u ignored me i msged her said i miss you to her. shes like u promised me you wouldnt talk to her i said yeah ur right i messed up but my intentions were good. shes like i dont care about ur intentions ur promised me and in the beggining of our relashinship she said i hate liars and i will break up with u first lie. she's super strict about her little crap rules because her ex's all treated her so good and did anything for her she said they stoped being friends with all there friends because she didnt like them. so shes got high standards. so that day she broke up with me she was also very sick and has been. so i thought it was maybe her flu called her the next day asked her if were gonna get back she said no. this is where i make the dumb mistake and beg i begged and said id do anything. then the next morning she called me and said oo i miss you and all this stuff. so i was like o yeah i miss you 2. then i talked to my friend on maple story who informed me about this website long time ago. she said i should go nc for a while. this was reallly hard for me to do. so that day she called me she said call her at lunch and i couldnt help myself so i did no answer which i figured. later that day she texted me what are u doing i told her then i asked her do u really miss me? do u still have feelings she said yea. i just needed to hear it i guess she asked it back to me then. the next day she asked how have my last few days been and what did i do. i said surf w/e w/e w/e w/e shes like oo u seem to be fine without me i said no i miss you truth is i need to get my mind of u i dont wanna sit in my room depressed. so for the last3days now i have not been making contact with her she contacts me now but in the game she i will say hi and bye. i also try to be very talkative in the game and make smiley faces=] to make it seem like im fine. so last night she called me and we talked normal i kind of didnt put much effort into the conversation. then i texted her a smiley face=]. then this morning she texted me good morning=]. i responded with good morning just woke up feeling better. because shes been sick. she then said ur late again why are u always late i said no im taking my motercycle today ill be fine. so then she responded can i call u at recess i said sure. offcourse she didnt call. i didnt expect a call so its fine. i'm not sure if what im doing is right i need help advice pls someone=/

fyi: i do not love her yet and she knows it we dont say i love u. we take our relashinship very serious though.

[madgun68]

Here's my 2 cents on this whole issue.

 

If your ex dumped you because they fell out of love with you, then you can choose to go NC or not, either way, it won't matter much. I think you can make it a lot worse by chasing, begging, pleading, etc (especially if they are involved with someone else). But really what you should be doing is at least some form of NC to get yourself back into shape. NC is not and should not be viewed as punishing your ex. That may be a by product of it but it isn't the reason for it. The reason is to get yourself fixed. The reason is for yourself, not for them.

 

If your ex dumped you because they felt unloved or unappreciated, your odds of getting back together are a lot better as long as you do a self-evaluation and figure things out. If an ex is still in love with you then you stand an excellent change of reconcilliation.

 

The problem with NC is when it's not used for what it was intended for and that is for healing yourself. If you know that maintaining contact with your ex is not good for you, CUT THEM OFF. Go strict NC until you feel that you can handle a conversation with them without breaking down, begging, pleading, etc.

 

NC isn't about playing games (ie: manipulation, punishment, etc). It's about healing and nothing more.

 

Follow CaliGuy's advice.. Concentrate on healing yourself.

 

Definately remove them from contact lists where ever possible. This will ensure that you won't be able to reach them during any moments of weakness.

 

I didn't have that kind of advice and yes, it made matters worse. If you don't ruin the chances of being reunited outright, it'll just take much longer to happen.