Guest Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 Before i met my GF i was a virgin, she however has been with guys before. We are very loving with eachother and have been together for many months. We've only had sex twice and it's safe to safe it wasn't 'mind-blowing'. Anyway i think alot about her past relationships, in particular the partner she had before she met me. They were together for many years and he was substatially older than her, meaning he no doubt had alot of experience. This intimidates me so much, i find myself obsessing over it. I hate the thought of her with another guy and never ask her about things she's done in the past, but at the same time part of me wants to know everything about her ex-partner, wants to know what he was like, the things they did etc. I know they had unprotected sex, which considering they were together for so long shouldn't be a surprise. Having no sexual experience prior to her I feel like i'll never be able to make her feel nice the way she probably has with guys in the past. The thought of making love to her fills me with bad emotions such as anxiety, nervousness, insecurity and so forth. This way of thinking is having serious effects on me and my self esteem and confidence, she of course doesn't know, i don't feel it's something i could talk to her about. Link to post Share on other sites
megnog Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 i haven't been in the exact same situation BUT i do wonder about my boyfriends exes and if they were better than me in different ways (sexually). and that really saddens me because of course i want to be the only one to satisfy him .. however, everyone comes with a past. if you let this get to you, you will drive yourself INSANE. please don't let this get the best of you. as far as the sex goes, it will get better. as your relationship grows, you will understand eachothers needs and what you two like and dislike. you need to understand and fully believe that she is with you now and wants to be with you. even if the sex isn't great, she is probably loving it because its with YOU. you are lucky .. i think girls have it worse, i.e. if the situation was the other way around.. but because girls are emotionally into sex, unlike guys who are more physically into sex, she will be satisfied and happy. Now, as a first timer, you should explore and verbally ask her what she likes and maybe she could help you, if you guys haven't done that already. this will definately help you to feel better about pleasing her. Good Luck!!! oh and one more thing, don't ask her about her past sex life. i have wondered like hell and asked and got answers and now they can never erase from my mind. just don't ask Link to post Share on other sites
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