Prim&proper Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 So my bf and i broke up in jan. One month later to the day, he comes back claiming he's made a mistake. Says he's lost weight, can't eat, can't sleep, feels crappy all the time and wants to give it another try. I was hesitant and said we were only talking, though we acted like we were together. He travels for one month and we go away for a 2 week trip together. The first week we fought due to the stresses of my job and just learning to be together again. When we get back from the trip, he tells me that he has doubts about the relationship. He feels bad that we fought so much on the trip and there was one fight that he can't get over. He says he's not as gung-ho as he was before about the relationship. So I broke up with him last thursday. I'm going on Day 6 of NC. He hasn't contacted me but that's because he's traveling. This really sucks. I was doing so well and now i feel like i have to start back with this pain all over again. Overall, I'm doing a lot better than when we broke up last, but it still sucks. I'm convinced that people break up for a reason and second, third, or fourth chances just doesn't work. Link to post Share on other sites
hurting_in_nw Posted May 9, 2007 Share Posted May 9, 2007 I'm convinced that people break up for a reason and second, third, or fourth chances just doesn't work. Hopefully the folks in Hollywood don't catch wind of this... Link to post Share on other sites
ibitealil Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 Its our second chance in our relationship. I hope you r wrong, cuz its going pretty well right now. I can see hes trying and im trying too. We r in LDR. Its been three months since we got back together again. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Prim&proper Posted May 10, 2007 Author Share Posted May 10, 2007 Ibite, I hope for you it works. I think the chances are slim that it'll work, but if you both are trying and determined to try, then it may work. My ex seemed to want to try only when he was away from me. When he is with me, he gives up so easily. I couldn't live with that wishy-washiness any longer. He went from one minute believing we were meant to be (usually when he's traveling) to being completely pessimistic about our compatibility. I think the idea is not to rely on quick fixes, because the same problems will come up again and you have to be determined to find ways to fix it. Good luck to you. I hope it works. Link to post Share on other sites
ibitealil Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 Thanks a lot for your concern, What was the reason of your arguments or nc if its ok with you to ask? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Prim&proper Posted May 10, 2007 Author Share Posted May 10, 2007 Ibite, it's a long story. But basically, I can't stand the wishy-washiness any longer. He would think we're meant to be and then we have moments where we fight (he gets exasperated and impatient with me, and I can't deal with that). The fights make him think we're not compatible. This time we had gone on a long trip together. during the trip, we went on a tour with a few other people. During the tour, i felt as if he just wanted to socialize with other people and felt really left out, so we got into a discussion about that. He felt really beaten down because he felt as if he tried really hard to minimize his "socializing" with other people, and yet I was still unhappy. So we come back and he says he has doubts about our relationship. He doesn't know whether we should be fully together, break up, or somewhere in between. He tells me he's ambivalent about the decision. So I said, i want to be with someone who wants to be with me. If he doesn't or is ambivalent, then it's best if we just break up. So I broke up with him. I haven't heard from him and have no desire to contact him. It hurts, but I think i deserve someone who really knows what he wants and that's me. I want someone who would never risk losing me because the thought of being without me is just unimaginable. I realized that my ex isn't it. Link to post Share on other sites
ibitealil Posted May 10, 2007 Share Posted May 10, 2007 Of course you deserve a man who makes you happy. In my case we also had too much arguments and then he got cold feeted about us because of it. But we r in LDR and i was acting needy and wanted constant attention from him which is impossible to give 100% in LDR. Then we talked it over and now i am trying to be cool and hes trying to be more attentive. Now things are a lot better, at least we dont argue that frequent anymore. I am still worried but hope it ll work out. I wish you all the best and if theres anything i can do plz txt me here :-) Link to post Share on other sites
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