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I'm not sure how i should proceed...


Passionate Lover

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Passionate Lover

Well, i really like this girl, she is just as sweet as me and she really makes me smile. I know she is special and i wouldnt dare to hurt her in anyway nor would i take her for granted.

 

But my last relationship ended because i jumped in head 1st and i scared her off.

 

 

But im not sure what to do now, i dont wanna lose yet another girl to the same mistakes, im trying to give her the space she needs but i dont know what to do, should i take it slow , but then maybe she will think i don'nt care, or should i go at the pace that is classed as "Fast".

 

We gotta a date 2morro and im not that nervous, i'm just scared incase i say i love her by mistake.

 

 

Any help would be greatly appreicated, thank you.

 

 

We aint been going out for long few days, but i thought it would be better to seak advice at the start so i wouldnt screw up :p

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Well, Guest, I can give you the girls perspective on guys who chase girls a little too much...because im in the situation now. Ask yourself if you would want a girl telling you she wants to marry you and she has kids names picked out, etc. on your first date. scary right? so think about what you're telling her (im sure thats not what you say), and dont try to be anything but yourself. ask her questions, and let her talk about herself. Really, if shes going on a date with you, dont try all that hard. be polite and if you have stuff in common, talk about that.

basically, act like you two are friends, it will slow things down, and then maybe she will have a chance to pursue you a little. who doesnt want to feel wanted?

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Uh, yeah, saying you love her on the first date would definitely be moving too fast.

 

Take it slow. I sense that for you, slow is going to be normal speed for other people so you run no risk of her thinking you're not interested.

 

Go out, call her a couple days later and ask her out again for the following weekend. Don't see her more than once or twice a week for a while. Don't spend all your time texting and phoning and emailing and whatnot. Gradually build up to that level of communication or you will be coming on too strong.

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Norajane's advice is very good. Also, telling someone your dating that you love them, is a big deal; a serious thing to tell someone. It shouldn't be thrown around too easily. Give dating enough time to develop a friendship or relationship (or both) and discover your common interests, share thoughts and small talk. If you call too much, you will appear too anxious. And once a dating relationship is established, still hold back on pursuing too much. Call several days a part at 1st; give her a day at least to return your calls if expected. But even if she doesn't call you for a week, it doesn't mean she doesn't like you; it would be ok to call her one more time at this point. If ya get nothin' here, she's losing interest. If you ever get that vibe from here, back off a whole lot. This is when you should consider dating someone else as well. Ask another girl out.

 

It takes practice, dating does. And eventually you'll know when it's really right to say you love her! Remember your not in a race against time.:)

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