sunshine79 Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 my fiance and i have been doing really well...until about a week ago. his snoring has started effecting my sleeping and causing us to bicker (half-awake bickering) i wake him up to have him roll over so i don't have to hear his snoring in my ear. i hate it. last night it was so bad i had to wake him up to tell him to roll over and it pissed him off...(i haev to understand..it's 2 in the morning, i would be pissed too) and he said that he's going to start sleeping in our guest room...i'm so sad. we're not even married and will be sleeping in different rooms??!! ugh i can't take it anymore though, tossing and turning and just about falling asleep and the snoring start. i'm worthless, i'm sleepy, i go home every day to take a nap and not do anything because i'm so tired. i don't get anything done, i haven't cared about teh cleanliness of our house, about my job...i'm just so tired. the culprit is his weight gain, he knows it, i know it...but i'm afraid it's going to ruin us. i'm a very sensitive person and when it comes to hearing that i won't be sleeping in teh same bed with my fiance i'm crushed...waht do i do?? he's on a diet so hopefully that will help but the sleepless nightsa re catching up with me and we're starting to bicker... anyone been here before?????? Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 He could be having problems breathing due to allergies too. I don't know what to tell you. It sounds like you are mad at him for something he maybe can't change and use it to make excuses on why you're slacking off at home. Maybe he's punishing you by sleeping in the other room or maybe he's doing it so you can stop complaining about something he maybe can't change. Regardless, you should really re-evaluate your relationship before getting married. Link to post Share on other sites
Citizen Erased Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 If you can't sleep because of his snoring, then hop in the spare room bed. I can understand you wanting to sleep next to him, but it is not something he can control, yet I can understand he doesn't want to be woken up every night. This is not his fault, I would bet the majority of people snore, it is something you are just going to have to deal with because it is not like there is a cure. You can try to get him to go to those sleep clinics or whatever, but they are really for people with real problems like sleep apnia. BTW, I like your little remark about his weight gain. Skinny people snore too honey. Link to post Share on other sites
Jinxx Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 the culprit is his weight gain, he knows it, i know it...but i'm afraid it's going to ruin us. Been there! Even the friggin dog snores. It gets worse with the weight gain and eventually you'll find yourself sleeping on the couch or in another bed. Hopefully your fiance will stick to his diet. My husband (legally separated) never did but has to now. He never snored before he got fat. And now his his health is suffering because of his poor eating habits and weight problem. Keep encouraging him to stick to his diet. Work out together. Walk together. Do whatever you need to do to stay active. As back up -- get yourself a prescription for Amiben. That will help you sleep through anything. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sunshine79 Posted May 14, 2007 Author Share Posted May 14, 2007 isn't that a little harsh amaysn?? reevaluate getting married?? didn't think it was that major of a problem i'm going to start walking and pushing him to get back in shape. and yes, weight gain does play a BIG part in this. i just think sleeping in different rooms, will make us grow apart Link to post Share on other sites
Jinxx Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 i'm going to start walking and pushing him to get back in shape. and yes, weight gain does play a BIG part in this. i just think sleeping in different rooms, will make us grow apart The weight gain will make you grow apart too -- especially if you are in shape and take care of yourself. And you are right -- it does play a HUGE part in this. My husband was furious when I opted to sleep outside of the bedroom. I got tired of going to work like a zombie. Good for you for giving him that extra shove to get in shape. You both will be much happier if he can get a handle on it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sunshine79 Posted May 14, 2007 Author Share Posted May 14, 2007 he's definitely trying and i know that is what has caused his bad moods lately...he's unhappy with himself and now that it's summer time i think he wants to be back how he was. i still think he's gorgeous but when he complains about it all the time it does get on my nerves and then make me think about it. i wish my fiance would get furious if i decided to sleep outside the bedroom but instead it's me getitng mad and worrying, that's why i havent' done it...plus i can't sleep anywhere but the bed...i for some erason won't hear my alarm and have overslept for work every single time i slept out of our bedroom i just talked to him for the first time this morning and he didn't even remember getting ill with me, he said he slept 'great'...ugh...atleast he didn't remember saying he was sleeping in the guest room! lol Link to post Share on other sites
Miss_Bee Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 my fiance and i have been doing really well...until about a week ago. his snoring has started effecting my sleeping and causing us to bicker (half-awake bickering) i wake him up to have him roll over so i don't have to hear his snoring in my ear. i hate it. last night it was so bad i had to wake him up to tell him to roll over and it pissed him off...(i haev to understand..it's 2 in the morning, i would be pissed too) and he said that he's going to start sleeping in our guest room...i'm so sad. we're not even married and will be sleeping in different rooms??!! ugh i can't take it anymore though, tossing and turning and just about falling asleep and the snoring start. i'm worthless, i'm sleepy, i go home every day to take a nap and not do anything because i'm so tired. i don't get anything done, i haven't cared about teh cleanliness of our house, about my job...i'm just so tired. the culprit is his weight gain, he knows it, i know it...but i'm afraid it's going to ruin us. i'm a very sensitive person and when it comes to hearing that i won't be sleeping in teh same bed with my fiance i'm crushed...waht do i do?? he's on a diet so hopefully that will help but the sleepless nightsa re catching up with me and we're starting to bicker... anyone been here before?????? Sorry that you guys aren't getting along to well Sunshine. Both my bf and I grind our teeth in our sleep, but surprisingly, we've never fought over it before. I got a splint from the dentist that i hate. Thankfully my bf was sweet enough to insist on ear plugs, so i don't have to wear that damn thing. His grinding rarely bothers me because the dead are livelier than me when i am sleeping . But on occasion when i do wake up, and he's grinding and snoring, I rub his cheek and that usually stops the snoring and grinding. I suggest you try some good quality earplugs, also try rubbing his cheek. I don't know if that's a common way to get someone to stop or not. But it works on him, and he said it worked on me too. Link to post Share on other sites
littlekitty Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 My H2B fidgets (to the extreme) and has a sniffing tick. His sniff is sooo loud it wakes me up out of a deep sleep! On a bad night he will take himself off into our spare room to allow me (a light sleeper) to get a good nights sleep. I don't believe it has effected our relationship in any way! We're as close as we always have been!! Link to post Share on other sites
milvushina Posted May 14, 2007 Share Posted May 14, 2007 Maybe you just need a little practice to get him trained to roll over on his side when he wakes you up. My husband is a snorer and he used to get really mad at being woken up until he got used to it. Now I don't even have to wake him up all the way, just push on his arm and whisper to roll over. Still snores but its tolerable on his side. Or: is it possible for you to sleep with earplugs? (Miss Bee, you really should wear your splint. I know that they suck but I wish I would have worn mine starting years ago... I hate for other people to get joint and muscle problems from grinding, like I did...) Link to post Share on other sites
amaysngrace Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 isn't that a little harsh amaysn?? reevaluate getting married?? didn't think it was that major of a problem i'm going to start walking and pushing him to get back in shape. and yes, weight gain does play a BIG part in this. i just think sleeping in different rooms, will make us grow apart It just seems to me that you are picking on him, showing him your dissatisfaction. You are complaining about his snoring and his weight gain. Meanwhile, you even blame him for the things you don't accomplish, like the housework. And now he suggests you two sleep in different rooms as a solution to what you're complaining about but you are even unhappy about that. I just thought I should point it out to you that I see a pattern here that you maybe focus on the negative of this man. In time and in marriage these things usually only get worse if this is what you see in him. It doesn't mean that you don't appreciate him at all. Maybe you are just going through a phase or something and used this place as a way to vent. I don't really know your situation or your relationship at all. I was just trying to throw it out there is all. And maybe try to keep you from making the mistake that many have fallen into...seeing the faults in their partner rather than their attributes. But you know your relationship best. Link to post Share on other sites
candy Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 People are being a little hard on you! i know the feeling...i'm not engaged but my BF snores horribly, and it is a big issue. people always joke about snoring but it can be horrible, especially for a light sleeper like myself and apparently you, too. its no joke! when i sleep over my BF house which i do like once a week, his snoring is louder than anyone i've ever heard snore. and i ask him to sleep in one of his other bedrooms but he says "its my house i'll sleep in my bed" and thats true, sometimes i go in the other room. but that's not a permannent solution, esp. if we were ever married. i woudl want to sleep in my husbands bed with him. and it's not that he' s so heavy, although he has a little pudgy stomach he's basiclaly in shape and goes to the gym often. i think it's he had a bad nose job once....i tell him to sleep on his side or stomach cause they say your back is the worst place to sleep. have your fiancee try that! also the nose strips helps some people, or possibly ear plugs for you. i tried them all, nothing worked they may help you. i sit there waiitng for the snoring to start, so i can't fall asleep, if i finally do he starts and i hit him. then the next day i am so tried, i need at least 8 hours to function. and once a week is fine , but again, if we were ever ,married , or you and your fiancee, then what?? they also have sleep clinics, my BF too stubborn to do that, maybe your guy will do i t. but it is a real problem, not funny, you're not being bithcy just need sleep!! and i think our men should do anyhting they can to allevaite the problem,a sit is usually curable or controllable Link to post Share on other sites
Miss_Bee Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 (Miss Bee, you really should wear your splint. I know that they suck but I wish I would have worn mine starting years ago... I hate for other people to get joint and muscle problems from grinding, like I did...) People get joint and muscle problems from not wearing a spint? I've never heard of this before. Link to post Share on other sites
milvushina Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 People get joint and muscle problems from not wearing a spint? I've never heard of this before. I am sorry....I do not want to get off subject but I don't seem to be able to PM. Grinding isn't always that serious Miss Bee, but if so it can cost lots of money to fix, and it can get worse over time. It usually is worse if you grind because your teeth are not aligned right, than if you do it out of stress. Please look at this link http://www.dentalconcepts.com/html/bruxism.html That is all! Sorry again. Link to post Share on other sites
VinaAmez Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 I could never get use to snoring and can't stand listening to someone else doing it. Why not have him try those snoring strips or you try ear plugs. Link to post Share on other sites
milvushina Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 Those snoring strips are great, they really do work. If you can't wear earplugs because you need to hear the alarm, try the strips. Link to post Share on other sites
VinaAmez Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 Those snoring strips are great, they really do work. If you can't wear earplugs because you need to hear the alarm, try the strips. Shoot I should take that advice myself. I've been told I snore but I have yet to hear it myself so I can't confirm this information. Link to post Share on other sites
annabelle75 Posted May 16, 2007 Share Posted May 16, 2007 My ex-husband snored so loud I started sleeping on the couch at one point. Then one day while I was complaining to my mom about it, my dad said, "Buy some earplugs and stop waking him up." I hate to admit it, but my dad was right. Even though sometimes i could hear him through the ear plugs it wasn't as bad and once I went to sleep he never woke me up. It was an easy fix to a debilitating problem. As long as your alarm is loud enough to wake you in the morning, it should work for you too. Link to post Share on other sites
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