atn:sooni

[robyn]

ou seem like a very bright person who has been around the world. thankyou for your advise i do appreciate it. But one more question what would you do if it were you? Do I keep digging for more info or do i let it go? By the way, i am digging on my own due to the fact that i am afraid to ask him about it because it was a bad experience for him (prison) and he doesn't like to talk about it. Are you a woman scorned yourself? Hope to hear from you soon. Thanks again.

[Sooni]

Am I a woman scorned? Hmmm? I use to be....really, really bad!

 

I feel like I'm on the Jerry Springer show on The Love Shack! I'm only 33 have been through alot. I use to be ashamed to tell people what I went through. Now I'm not. I made a conscious effort to make some major changes within my self. I've been single for 8 years now and have alot of time to learn about myself and have choose to make my bad exeprience a stepping stone in my life.

 

What would I do if it were me? First of all I would have never allowed him to move in. That's MY space. That's where I go to be alone....to get away. Plus it's easier to send the guy home than it is to kick him out!!! Then as I am dating, I ask alot of questions. Most men don't like that but I like to know what I'm getting into. I've been dating this guy for over a year.....all I need to say is I have children. I have grown really fond of him. But I know it's not going to work. I hate the thought of breaking it off..but I need to. In order for me to be happy...I need to. I'm miserable! Sometimes the hardest things to do in life is the best thing to do. And as a woman and an individual....never 2nd quess you gut feelings.

 

Anyhow!

 

I was married to a guy who smoked pot. Sold it, bought it. Later I found out he was snorting coke. I still hung around. As time went by he started smoking crack....then he went into smuggling herion......Ha! Now is in prison for life in Thailand! And from what I hear. He is still doing drugs. And almost 4 years ago his mother kiddnapped my little girl and I am still unable to find her.

 

I've been married twice. My first husband was an alcholic. Has 13 Dui's. Which makes him a convicted felon. He still drinks. He's been in and out of pen's, rehab centers, half way houses. You name it, he's been there! He's 34 and still doing the same thing. He has lost all credibility of character with me....but who am I? I am someone who swears to never get involve with men that has a past like that. I desereve better than that.

 

We as humans tend to have a pattern in which we are familiar and are comfortable with. I had a pattern with not 1 but 2 husbands. The hard part is trying to break the cycle. But I did it! All I have is me and my children. And we only live once. We deserve to be happy. So why do we permit things that are negative to consume our lives?

 

We rob ourselves of a full life.

 

You should not have to dig. Granted we all secrets that we share with no one. But his secret past was a way life for him. And if he has not made the effort to change that past, then it effects everyone he comes in contact with....even you. Some people don't talk about things because they either don't want to, are ashamed to or their hiding something....or it just could be the comfort level isn't there or the trust hasn't been built. What ever the reason, you as an individual have a right to know because he is now a part of you.

 

Sweetie...I can not tell you how to live you life, like wise no one can tell me.

 

But remember you only live once. We cannot turn back the hands of time.

 

I sit in front of a computer all day...sorry it get so long winded. I'll get off my cracker jack box now!! :0)

 

But I'm here if you need me!