New to most of this.

[Shizz]

Hey everyone.

 

I'll be completely honest with you all.

I'm fairly new to the whole dating etc thing. I've been out on a few dates before, but they never panned out. I've never been in a serious relationship. I was homeschooled, and as such missed out on most of the stuff teenagers get involved in. (First relationships, etc.) This hasn't helped my social abilities either, which coupled with the fact that I'm a naturally shy person makes me seem boring for some of the ladies my age. I've never been very good at making lasting friendships, but the few that I do have are really close.

I have been trying to improve, but I still lack polish when it comes to talking to new people, and new ladies in general.

Whats funny is the fact that despite my failings, I'm often told by loads of female friends that I'm a wonderful person, and they would go out with me, if they weren't already attached, etc. I'm also good with children, which often wins me the praises and admiration of mothers.

I'm also a virgin. I've had plenty of opportunities to lose it, (my brother has a penchant for women of loose moral values, and has introduced me to a few.) but have never met any women that I felt close enough to.

 

Recently I've met two new people.

This lovely young lady at obedience classes. It off slowly, the odd look here, the odd look there. She's a ginger, short stout and curvy stature, so had instant appeal for me.

Things progress, each session we seem to be spending more time eyeing each other up. Then my sister who works there lets it slip that I like her and wouldn't mind asking her out. Well, she got positive feedback. So next time I saw her, I asked her out, and she gave me her number. I called and recieved the grave words, she has a boyfriend, but she said she'd really like to get to know me better, since I seemed like a nice person.

 

Our first date was going out for coffee, which lasted about six hours. It was wonderful, we talked about all sorts of stuff, no awkward silence, no loss for words, we ended back at her place. I wished her goodnight all went well.

 

Next date, we go to see a movie, she asks if she can invite a female friend, I agree. We pick her friend up, who also turns out to be really pleasant. Then we went saw the movie, ended up going back to her place, and pretty much stayed up the whole night talking, ended up with us sleeping on the couch with her legs across mine.

 

I'm currently trying arrange a third date, she's invited me to go to a show with her and her female friend.

 

Also I've met up with an old acquintance and we are working together on a play. At the beginning, she was fairly tense, and quiet, but now she is starting to open up more. I'd love to ask her out on a date. But I'm not sure if she is interested. I've also got to kiss her for the play, which shouldn't be hard except the fact I'm usually shy about that sort of thing. Our conversations were slow to start, sort of like feeling around in the dark for a door knob, but now she is starting to open up more. She's a bit like me though, and lacks the fine polish. I went to rehearse at her house the other day, and she seemed much more at ease as well.

 

I have some questions for all of you.

 

Out of respect for her current beau, (I've never met him.) I've not made any intimations or tried anything untoward. We are currently platonic friends, leaning towards something bigger. She too has been very careful, to invite her friends along. Normally I'd never do anything like this, but the fact is, is that I honestly feel a connection with her, and I'm sure she feels one for me. I can tell from body langauge. And I'm willing to wait until she finishes her relationship before starting ours on a more intimate level. So how exactly when the time does come, do I go about initiating intimacy. I've kissed girls before, but never, kissed kissed. How exactly does one go about it? I've never been in this sort of relationship before, and never had anyone or anything to gage my examples by?

 

Also I've been invited to a wedding, in the coming months, and I'd really like her to be my date to the occasion. I'm usually depressed at weddings since I never seem to have a date. Do any of you think this is the right sort of thing to do?

She is a woman of experience and I'm a virgin, how exactly do I go about it when the time comes without looking like a complete fool?

 

And as for the Actress, how do I tell if she is interested, and is just a shy person? She doesn't seem to mind it when I touch her in the play, and she doesn't mind the odd touch now and then, but still seems to be a bit shy to it all. What are your guys thoughts?

 

Hope you guys can help.

[Shizz]

I forgot to add, that my first girlfriend cheated on me. Along with a stream of dissapointing attempts, has left me sorta gunshy up until now. I want to take things slowly, so to speak. Bur not too slowly;)

[Bree]

the first girl, she has a boyfriend so she is off limits leave it alone, at least till she is single. The actress if you feel a connection ride it out it may take awile but if she is worth it waiting will be worth it too.

[Shizz]

Thanks for your reply Bree.

 

Normally, I wouldn't date a girl with a boyfriend. (I've been previously burned by that fire.) Except for the fact that I don't meet people, or pretty young women often, that I like. Hence my reluctance to outright give her up. I am interested in a romantic relationship with her, but at the moment we are just friends. The only reason I was willing to go ahead originally was because I was told that she wasn't actually in a relationship with him, she was just living with the guy and her other housemate until they bought out her share of the house. The housemate has even been preparing to move his girlfriend in once she has moved out.

(Its troublesome though, she has seemed somewhat distant recently. One of her girlfriends for no reason at all told her we were sleeping together, and as such her boyfriend is also convinced of the fact, and as such wants to "Murder me.")

I realize she is trying to keep some distance between us while he is home from his job, which is fine, but I don't like getting blown off without an excuse. Its not like were doing anything two normal friends wouldn't do anyways.

I really really like this girl, but I refuse to be left expecting something to happen again, and never having it materialise. Like I said, I was bit by that flame before, and I never want to go through that process again. Even today, I've been left in a moody sort of apathy.

 

I'm determined to ask her where she stands with her boyfriend. She's mentioned on more than one occasion, that she doesn't really like him. So I'm going to ask her outright. And I will make my choice depending on her answer.

 

Any thoughts or advice on this strategy? I'm not really experienced so any good advice will be greatly appreciated.

 

 

As for my actress friend things are going well, I had to kiss her on stage the other day. (It was without a doubt the most enjoyable rewards of the evening.) She told me the other day that she is free for the summer, so I am definately going to ask her out. (She keeps on getting more and more appealing each time we meet.) The biggest obstacle I think will be her mother, who is more concerned with her achievements at the moment then her relationships.

 

I'm sorry to ramble on. I do appreciate the help this site give, and the people on it who have experience.

 

Shizz.