STARBABE911 Posted May 21, 2007 Share Posted May 21, 2007 Hey guys, So i was in a relationship with my ex boyfriend for 1 year and 8 months. i am 20 and he is 22 i was his first ever gf or the first girl he had ever been with. he loved me so much. about 11 months into our relationship i transferred to a different college 3 hours away so for about 9 months i saw him every other weekend about. when i went to school i broke up with him because i just wanted to have fun and see what was out there i just wasnt ready i guess. but after 2 weeks of being up there i wanted to be with him again and we got back together. then about 2 months ago i decided to move back to the same area he is and go to school bcuz i didnt like the other school. and when i found i was gonna be living in a really cool house with 2 girls i decided to break up again thinking i was gonna have fun. but then about a month ago i completly fell in love with him again and in my mind i know this time its more real than ever and im here to stay this time and not hurt him anymore. well when i did this he did a 360 on me and said well he didnt wanna be in a relationship right now and he wants to just do whatever he wants with whoever and not have to report with anyone. he wants to go out and party and stuff but thats not him at all! and he tells me well i go from being a good girl to a party girl but now im over the whole partying thing and hes neevr done that. and i told him well u like good girls but what do u think u r going to find out partying def wont be the good girls! we havent seen each other in a couple weeks cuz we have noth been gone but when we did we were acting like we were together even though we werent. i know i really hurt him b4 and that might have something to do with it but ive told him im serious this time and i really have changed but i know words dont say much. he is also going through a huge time in his life right now he just graduated from school and doesnt know what he is going to do and he is gettting surgery next week and he is not from america so he has another year here and then doesnt know if he will be able to stay in the country. wheneve i say ok then its over forever right he gets mad and says no y do u say forever i never said that. he says he loves me but just doesnt love me the way i want him to right now but yet his actions sometimes show otherwise. its just like hes locked himself off emotionally so he doesnt get hurt again. i love him soo much and i am just soo devasted right now. ive also been reading the ebooks on how to get them back and to just not have contact, but the problem with that is he will still be in contact with me he will just im me to say hey or something since he cant call he is out of the counrty right now. he comes back into the country in a week and i just dont know what to do! i really feel deep down he does love me hes just hiding it all right now for soo many things hes going through..so please any advice would be great! Link to post Share on other sites
chryssy83 Posted May 21, 2007 Share Posted May 21, 2007 Sounds to me like you hurt him badly enough by yanking him around before that he doesn't want to be in a relationship with you anymore. I think that what you did to him was immature and it doesn't sound like something you do when you love someone. Is it possible that you want him back now more than ever just because it seems that you can't have him? If it were him that had written on this message board instead of you, I would tell him that you didn't seem mature enough to be in a real relationship and that he'd be better off finding someone who deserves him. If you want to find "success" with him or another decent guy, focus on becoming someone who deserves him rather than just getting him back. Link to post Share on other sites
honeybees28 Posted May 21, 2007 Share Posted May 21, 2007 i think you should allow yourself to mature a bit more before you enter into a relationship with anyone. the story you gave was really rotten. how could you do that to someone? and expect them to keep taking you back? please, girl. you were not in love with him. people that are truly in love dont hop in and out of a relationship like that and treat the other person as if they were nothing but a play thing. your actions have proved again and again that you are not ready to be in a committed relationship. i would say leave him alone. sorry. that was a super hurtful thing to do to him. hopefully he finds someone who will love him enough to not leave every few months. Link to post Share on other sites
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