Spiraling down into a world of unhappiness and frustration

[cm12345]

Good morning All. I've come here because I feel this is one of the easiest ways to let out my feelings, by typing it out. I'm 29 years old, and have been with a great girl of exactly one year yesterday. I never knew someone out there existed quite like her. She has the be the most caring,loving and most fun person I've ever been around and I want to spend the rest of my life with her.

Now for the reason I come here. The last few months, I've felt ive gone to being a bf who didnt have a care in the world,was always happy,and felt like he was on cloud 9. Fast forward to now, and I still feel like im on cloud 9 minus being happy with myself. I seem to have a major issue with overanalyzing the most little things, which then anger me and wind up usually causing an argument between my gf and I. It can be that we go out to a lounge one night, and she tends to dance by herself because shes not all into that "all over each other while dancing", I take it as she doesnt want to be seen around me. Or it can be that shes cranky from work and such, but I for some reason think that its me and start arguing with her. She also tried quit smoking for my bday 3 weeks ago which is a great feat in its self, but when I still see her light up, I get such angered with her that it starts a fight.

I really dont know what to do. I am very happy in my relationship with her, but I almost feel damn near controlling and fatherly and it scares me so much. I want to change, but just dont know how to get into the mindset of changing those things. I really hope I can get a few opinions here or advice on my situation. Thank you all.

[alextop30]

I see what you are saying and yes it is very hard to stay where you are and not turn into that father figure. There are two choices that you have here and now. First focuse on yourself and when ever you feel like you are mad go and poor yourself some water or a drink if you feel like it and sip it down very slowly and calm yourlsef down. Second in order for you to really be father feagure you can have a child that would give u the perfect excuse to be doing that LOL.

 

It comes all down to you most of the time - I would suggest doing something extra so you dont focus on the little things as much when people are busy they dont think about details that much.

 

Hope I was able to help.