cryptic message from ex?

[Guest]

I stopped seeing this woman I really liked about 2 1/2 months ago. She liked me, but not as more than a friend even though it started off pretty intense, but it all fell apart. We got along great and always made each other laugh. When push came to shove, I told her I didn't want to be friends and that if she change her mind, she knew how to reach me. This was so hard to do because I was really faling for her.

 

So instead of trying to get her to reconsider her decision or do anything that would make me look needy or desparate, I completely disengaged from her. I never called her again. She called me a couple of times since and I have returned her calls a few days later, but I really didn't want to, but I still liked her. When we did talk, I kept the conversation completely away from the relationship and only talked about everyday fun stuff. Never letting her know I was really still hurt and missing her. I just played it like I didn't care anymore.

 

This has been so hard for me to do because I am still in love with her and the only reason I stopped being in touch with her was so that I wouldn't make a fool of myself and come off as a needy, loser ex-boyfriend and also to lick my wounds. I had never really heard of no contact until I saw it here and I guess that's what I was doing although I didn't know I was doing it. I have done my best not to call her because I don't want to lose it on the phone if she tells me she is seeing someone else. That's how much I still have feelings for her.

 

Well, the other day, I am on a local missed connections board that is part of a personals site that we met on and I saw something that caught my eye. I don't really think anyone would be looking for me, but there was one that I knew was from her. It had her age and my first initial and her location in the title. So I go and read it and it says "You're the only one who never tried again, I miss you".

 

This totally fit what I did and it did seem like it could be her, so I posted an anonymous reply a little later on the m4w side saying "How could I try again when you said you were seeing someone else and I knew it was time to back away and remove myself from that situation?" Then later that day on the w4m side, I see a post that starts with my first initial and her location and it says "I'm in love with you" and the text says. "I wish I could tell you this, but I can't. I don't know how this happened, but it did"

 

Now I am almost sure this is her, but I am wondering why it is so cryptic and placed in such a manner where I would most likely not see it and most likely not know it's for me. Just to be sure it's her, I phone her a day later, something I have never done since we stopped seeing each other and just left a simple what's up message and to say hi, not ever mentioning the messages I think she posted. She usually returns calls pretty quickly, but it has been about 4 days and nothing from her.

 

This leads me to believe it was her because I think she realizes I am calling her out. I hope she calls me so we can talk. If she is in love with me now and I still have feelings for her, how do I proceed? Why is she being so aloof now and not coming out and telling me? I hate games, I am a straight up guy.